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Kinsey

 

“Do you two know each other?” The Italian man named Michael demands to know.

“Yes,” Cesare replies as his caramel eyes pierce through me.

All these men are in designer suits similar to Cesare’s. Add that to the shooting and the method of questioning, and I know exactly where I am—with the New York Syndicate. 

Cesare and Michael radiate authority, and every woman around me is shivering in terror. My surroundings seem unreal as the stench of blood and gunpowder infuses the air.

“How?” Michael barks.

“She’s
my
Kinsey,” Cesare explains.

So, Cesare has talked about me to Michael?

“And, Joey, how do
you
know her?” Michael settles his scowl on him.

“We met at a café a couple of days ago.”

Cesare rakes his dark, wavy hair back with an obviously frustrated swipe of his hand.

I can’t seem to tear my gaze from him, and my heart hurts to see him after so long. In his tailored suit that doesn’t hide his muscular physique, he’s no longer the boy I loved. And he’s grown more handsome with age. Though, with his beard and strands of longer hair that end just below his ear, he seems harsher as well. Yet, he’s still as enticing as ever. I’d resigned myself to the idea of never seeing him again and am completely blindsided.

“I need to talk to Kinsey,” Cesare announces and hauls me by my upper arm to the hallway and into the first bedroom.

Still slightly intoxicated, I’m finally catching up to the fact that I’m in serious trouble. 

“So, you’re fucking my Capo?” Cesare hisses. 

The hostility vibrating off him is excruciatingly palpable. Nonetheless, apart from fear, I feel a rising strength. After five years, he can’t even manage a hello?

“That’s none of your business.”

He takes a menacing step closer. “It became my business when you came to this party.”

I try to get my bearings, but having him this close is wreaking havoc on my brain. His familiar ocean cologne brings back memories better left in some distant, dusty corner of my mind.

“Jesus Christ, Kins! What are you doing here?” he stresses.

“I-I…
shit
! I’m just friends with Joey, and he invited me to this…” I wave my hand around. “…this massacre.”

“How did you meet Joey?”

“In a café. Cesare…” 

When I say his name out loud, it’s as if we finally realize that we’re really, truly standing in front of each other. Cesare edges closer, his breath fans my cheek, and my hand rests on his chest of its own volition. In reaction, he covers my palm with his, and electricity pulses from the heat of his skin.

“Kins…” he whispers in an anguished tone and braces my neck, pulling me to him.

I inhale sharply as he nuzzles me, just like he used to. And it causes the reality of how I ache from his absence in my life to rise to the surface. My entire body is drawn to him as if time hasn’t altered our feelings.

I remember the words he said to me so many years ago—
I’ll take care of you now.

But then he steps back, shaking his head and releasing my hand. Rubbing his beard incessantly, he holds my gaze. “What happened to you? You look different, not like
you
.”

“I
am
different. Five years have passed. I’ve changed.”

“I guess…”

“What’s going to happen now?” I ask.

Cesare merely studies me, seeming lost in thought.

Abruptly, he orders me, “Don’t talk to anyone. Only answer questions from Michael.”

“What? Why? Are you keeping me here?” Frantically, I close the distance between us, but he retreats as if he can’t stand to be close to me.

Before he exits the room, he tells me bitterly, “Kinsey, just do as I say or…”

Cesare lets the threat linger, and I swallow. He’s fuming, although his eerily calm façade hides it, but I can see his nostrils flaring. My best choice is to comply, so I nod, unsure of his intention. There’s so much I want to say, but I can’t because the circumstances of our reunion are clouded by murder and death.

Without another word, he opens the door and beckons for me to follow him.

Back in the spacious living room, I notice fewer people. Men are already clearing out dead bodies.

Cesare barks, “Where’s Michael?”

“He’s putting Rachel in his room,” Joey replies, sneering at me when Cesare looks away.

I simply ignore him and stand there uneasily.
This is so surreal.

Michael returns and passes me, going to Cesare. They whisper back and forth.

Then Michael points to five girls and me. “You’re staying here until I’ve done a background check. If I find out any one of you is involved with the raid and my fiancée’s murder, you won’t leave this place alive.”

“You can’t just keep us here,” I protest without thinking.

Cesare throws me an icy glare, silently ordering me to zip it.

Michael insolently cocks his head and calmly states, “Do as I say, or I’ll show you things worse than death.”

His words effectively shut me up as a shiver runs down my spine, and a man with a heavy Italian accent grabs my arm. “Walk.”

I pull my arm back, but Cesare’s on the Italian within seconds, shoving him away from me. 

“No one touches this girl!” And he sends a damning glare around the room, finally resting it on Michael, who makes an almost imperceptible hand movement. It’s as if they’re silently communicating.

“Cesare,” Joey says. “She’s
my
date. What are you doing?”

“Are you questioning my authority?” Cesare snarls.

A gasp comes from the other men.

“No! But…who is she to you?”

Michael and Cesare look at each other again, and Cesare visibly changes. 

“Who’s she to me?” He gives me a sidelong glance. “I took her virginity.”

“You ass!” I retort, unable to hold it back.

And Cesare smirks, dispelling the tension among his men.

Hurriedly, Cesare hauls me with him, back to the room, and practically throws me on the bed. 

“You’re staying here tonight.”

Before I get the chance to react, he slams the door closed and locks it from the outside while I bang my palms on the surface. “Cesare!”

But he’s already gone, and I’m trapped in here. Then it dawns on me that he isn’t the Cesare that I used to know, yet he is. He was always protective of me, beyond reason, just as he’s been today, but the years have hardened him. I guess Cesare must’ve become a very high ranking member of the Syndicate.

Sitting down on the edge of the mattress, I wait while our past invades my thoughts.

 

 

Eleven Years Ago ~ Age Sixteen

 

Kinsey

 

Cesare has been my best friend for four years, but lately, there’s a difference. I’m constantly aware when he touches me, and I’m also quite aware of how cute he is. Other girls in school always giggle and flirt with him, and recently, I’ve started to resent it. But I haven’t said anything to him about it, and unfortunately, it’s resulted in a distance between us. While I used to see him almost three times a week, now, I sometimes don’t speak to him for days. 

On occasion, I wonder if he’s getting more involved with his father’s gang. I’ve learned that Cesare’s father is part of the New York Syndicate, and I understand that their wealth comes from the
Cosa Nostra
, from the criminal world. And Cesare knows about his father too, but he says he isn’t part of that life—yet.

Today after school, I’m in the park, lying on my back and reading, when Cesare joins me.

“Hey,
piccolina
.”

Because I’m still only five-foot-four and my body refuses to grow, he calls me
piccolina
, which is Italian for
shortie
.

Cesare plops down sideways, resting his head on my stomach, and takes the book from my hands so that I’ll look him in the eye. “Want to hang out tonight?” He tosses my book on the ground and turns onto his stomach, now resting his chin playfully on my belly.

He’s so striking, and I fight the urge to wind my fingers in his dark, thick hair that constantly falls over his forehead with strands that never stay in place.

While I want to meet him tonight, I’m otherwise occupied. “I can’t.”

He perks a brow. “What are you doing?”

“I have a date,” I comment softly.

Cesare sits up instantly, and I follow suit so that he doesn’t tower over me.

“A date?” he repeats skeptically.

“Yes, a date.” It
is
my first date, so Cesare’s surprised reaction isn’t odd.

“With who?” A vein in his forehead throbs, and tension coils his body.

“Are you angry? You go on dates all the time, and then you tell me about them in great detail. I need to date too. I’m almost sixteen, and I haven’t even been kissed. It’s pathetic. I’m this close to hiring a male escort!” I hold my thumb and forefinger an inch apart and grin.

He barks out a laugh, but the moment of fun is gone as soon as it came, and he quietly murmurs, “I miss you.”

“We can hang out tomorrow.”

“Why aren’t you answering my question?”

At first, I’m confused, but then I state, “Oh, my date is Parker.”

“I fucking hate him!” Cesare hisses.

And I’m surprised by his reaction. Could he feel the same pull between us? He can have any girl, but could he be attracted to me?

I need to know, so I prompt, “Why are you so mad? Is…Do you not want me to go?”

His gaze snaps to me as he considers his answer. “If you want to go, you can. Just be careful.”

I can? And wow, did I just entirely misread this situation.

“I can?” I spit and rise. “I don’t need your permission! Just be a friend and support me. Tell me to have fun, like I have over and over while you go on dates with every skank in school!”

Cesare looks as if I’ve slapped him and grits his teeth. Instead of taking me on, he stands up and strides away without a word.

So I go home to get ready for my date, and, hopefully, a first kiss. Even though it’s not with the boy I wanted, I’m still nervous. I’ve waited long enough for Cesare to kiss me, and I’m done waiting.

 

 

Eleven Years Ago ~ Age Sixteen

 

Cesare

 

I find myself stalking Kins because I can’t stand that she’s on a date. I know she only sees me as a brother, but I sure as hell don’t see her as my sister. While I’ve grown to almost six feet, Kinsey’s still just as tiny, although her body and face have changed. Her hips and ass have filled out, and her full, pink lips always tantalize me. My hormones are in overdrive, and I’ve been having dreams about her. When I’ve kissed other girls, she’s popped up behind my eyelids. I want to kiss
her
. Touch her bare, smooth, bronze skin. Slip my hands through her long black hair. Taste her. Fuck her. 

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