McIver's Mission (21 page)

Shaun decided that he might be willing to endure the
interrogation, but he didn't have to make it easy. "The two of who?"

Colin took a long swallow of beer. "Cut the crap.
I know you spent the weekend with Arden."

"How do you know that?"

"Because both you and Arden were out of town on
the weekend, and I obviously interrupted something hot and heavy when I stopped
by Sunday afternoon."

"You should have been a rocket scientist instead
of a hockey player," Shaun said dryly.

Colin shrugged. "Just confirm that everything
went okay, so that I don't have to worry about Nikki worrying about
Arden."

Shaun couldn't prevent the grin. "Everything went
okay."

"Geez, Shaun. I don't need to know that kind of
stuff."

"I didn't say anything."

"It was the look." Colin shook his head.
"Man, I never thought I would see the day that you fell again."

"Fell?"

"In love."

"I'm not—" The denial had risen immediately
to his lips, but he couldn't speak the words. And he wondered if maybe his
brother wasn't right. He remembered how he'd felt when Arden had walked out
Sunday night. He'd never minded living alone in the four-bedroom house—he liked
the space, the solitude. But after spending the weekend with Arden, the house
had seemed emptier than usual. He'd felt alone. Incomplete.

"Maybe I am in love," he admitted at last.

Colin raised his glass, drank. "It happens to the
best of us," he said. Then, "What does Arden have to say about
it?"

Shaun didn't have to think about the question.
"She'd panic."

"She doesn't know?"

"No."

"You plan on telling her anytime soon?"

"I think I need some time to get used to it
myself." Then he'd figure out some way to ease her into it. To help her
realize that she loved him, too.

Colin shrugged. "It's your life."

It was, Shaun realized. And nothing in his life
mattered to him more than Arden.

He continued to ponder the situation long after Colin
had gone. He hadn't been joking when he'd said Arden would probably panic if
she knew how he felt. The realization had almost sent him into a tailspin.

He'd only ever been in love once before, with Jenna.
But what he'd felt for his former fiancée was different from what he felt for
Arden. He'd been a lot younger when he'd known Jenna, easily dazzled by her
effervescent personality. No one would ever describe Arden as effervescent. She
was, however, as committed to her career as Jenna had been. And that worried
him.

Was he destined to fall in love with women who
subjugated their personal lives to professional obligations?

Arden had made it clear that her clients were her
priority. But with Jenna, it had all been part of a master plan to get ahead—to
become the rich and successful attorney. Arden's motivation went deeper. Her
law practice wasn't just a business to her, she cared about her clients. She
fought for them, not because she was being paid to do so, but because they
needed her. And because she needed to know that she could make a difference.

She'd already made a difference in his life. She was
the strongest woman he'd ever known, almost fiercely independent. He'd thought
he wanted a woman who needed him. A wife who would be content to stay at home
and have his meals on the table at the end of the day. Okay, so maybe it was
chauvinistic and old-fashioned, and he knew now that it wasn't what he was looking
for. He wanted a partner in every sense of the word.

And he knew that Arden could be that partner.

Now all he had to do was convince her of the fact.

* * *

Less
than half an hour after Nikki had gone, Arden pulled open her door to find
Shaun on the other side. Her heart jolted, did that long, slow somersault in
her chest. She couldn't believe his mere presence still had this effect on her.

"How do you always manage to get into the
building without using the intercom?" she asked.

Shaun grinned. "Mrs. Dempsey. She likes me."

Arden shook her head despairingly, but she couldn't
deny the truth of his statement.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

Arden stepped back, and he stepped into her apartment.
Before she'd even closed the door, he had her in his arms, his mouth on hers.
His kiss was long and lingering.

"I've been thinking about you all day," he
admitted.

It worried her that his words so clearly mirrored her
own feelings. She'd been convinced that she could enter into a consensual
sexual relationship with Shaun with her eyes wide open, that nothing would
happen that she didn't want to happen. But somehow her emotions had spiraled
wildly out of control.

It hadn't scared her so much on the weekend because
she'd convinced herself that it was the romantic atmosphere of the hotel. But
this was the real world, and still, he made her feel things she'd never thought
she would feel. He made her want things she knew she could never have.

Making love with Shaun was unlike anything she'd ever
experienced. Not just because of the mind-blowing orgasms, although those were
worth the price of a ticket themselves. But it was so much more than the
physical. Being with Shaun, having him beside her, made her feel complete.
Fulfilled.

And it terrified her, because she knew she was falling
in love with him. Everyone she'd ever loved had left her. From her father, when
she was only four years old, to Brad Fullerton, in her last year of law school.

But she'd never had a relationship like this. So easy
and relaxed. So comfortable. With anyone else she'd dated, she'd always felt as
if she had to be on her best behavior, that she had something to prove. Shaun
had never asked her to be anyone but herself. He accepted her, completely and
without question.

Of course, he didn't know everything there was to know
about her. Would it make a difference to him? She didn't want to think so, but
she didn't know. And she was afraid to find out. Afraid that if she did tell
him, it would matter, and he wouldn't want to be with her anymore.

His kiss pushed her concerns aside. When he carried
her down the hall to her bedroom, she couldn't think about anything but how
right it felt to be with him. And when his body joined together with hers, she
knew she'd finally found the place where she belonged.

After their bodies were thoroughly sated, Arden sighed
and snuggled against him. It was so much more than the sex. It was Shaun. She
closed her eyes, finally acknowledging that she was in over her head and
helpless to do anything about it. But she didn't have to let him know it. As
long as she kept her feelings to herself, she could maintain the illusion of
having some control over the situation.

She cared about Shaun, and the affection she felt
intensified the experience of their lovemaking. But that didn't mean she was in
love with him. She certainly didn't want to be.

It's not a matter of choice or preference
.
Shaun's words echoed in her mind, taunted her. Arden banished them to the back
of her mind.

Love complicated things. Emotional attachments made
people vulnerable. It opened them up to heartache and disappointment. She would
enjoy her relationship with Shaun for as long as it lasted, but she would
not
fall in love.

So resolved, she let the strong and steady beat of his
heart beneath her cheek lull her into a deep, contented sleep.

* * *

Shaun
had never given much thought to his morning routine. He got up when the alarm
went off, stumbled downstairs to the kitchen to turn on the kettle, then jolted
himself into wakefulness with a cold shower. He'd been doing the same thing for
too many years to count. But waking with Arden in his bed—well, that was still
a new and exciting experience.

She wasn't a morning person. She didn't offer much in
the way of conversation until she'd had a shower and at least one cup of
coffee. The first night she'd stayed over, she'd been appalled to realize he
didn't even own a coffeemaker.

He'd gone out that same day and bought one. Now, when
Arden spent the night, he'd turn on the coffeemaker at the same time he put on
his kettle. He enjoyed the routine they'd established when she spent the night
at his house, or he at her apartment.

It mystified him, how easily she fit into his life,
how firmly she'd established a hold on his heart. He knew she wasn't ready to
hear how he felt about her, and he was trying to be patient. There was no need
to rush when he knew they'd have the rest of their lives together.

"Do you want to catch a movie tonight, or would
you rather stay in?" Shaun asked her Friday morning.

"Oh, um, actually, I have other plans."
Arden was leaning against the counter, sipping her coffee.

"Other plans?" Shaun frowned, not
comfortable with her response, or his instinctive reaction to it. "What
kind of plans?"

"I have a dinner meeting."

"With whom?"

"Warren Blake."

He dropped his toast onto a plate, carried it over to
the table. There was no point in overreacting, he told himself. If Arden was
having dinner with Blake, there was a logical explanation. But he wanted to
know what the hell it was. "Why are you going out with the assistant
district attorney?"

She refilled her mug with coffee. "It's not a
date, Shaun. It's a sentence negotiation."

"Why can't you negotiate during regular business
hours?" he grumbled.

"Because he's been tied up in a trial for the
past two weeks, and we're back in court early next week for sentencing."

"I'm not going to pretend I like this
arrangement."

Arden straightened her shoulders. "This is my
job, Shaun."

He sighed. "I know. And if it was anyone but
Blake, I wouldn't say anything about it."

"What do you have against Warren?"

"I don't trust him," he admitted.

She frowned. "It's a business dinner."

Sure, he thought. And all he'd wanted was to be her
friend. "Be careful."

"Don't you think you're overreacting just a
little?"

"No, I don't." He pushed away from the
table.

"I can take care of myself."

He smiled and brushed his thumb over her bottom lip.
"Make sure you do."

Her tongue traced the path of his thumb, a
subconsciously erotic gesture that almost made him forget he was due in court
in twenty minutes.

"I'll call you tomorrow," Arden said.

"Call me when you get home."

"I'll call you tomorrow," she said again.

Shaun touched his mouth to hers, nibbled gently on the
fullness of her bottom lip until he heard her soft sigh, felt her body yield
against him.

"Maybe I'll call you when I get home," she
relented.

He walked out of the house with his briefcase in hand,
a satisfied smile curving his lips.

* * *

When
Arden pulled into her designated parking spot outside her apartment building
early Saturday morning, she was starting to lose the battle to keep her eyelids
open. She was looking forward to a long hot shower and a few hours of sleep—not
necessarily in that order. She grabbed her purse off the passenger seat and
stepped out of the car. The cold wind slapped her in the face. She wrapped her
coat more tightly around herself and headed for the front door.

"Where the hell were you last night?" Shaun
demanded.

Arden glanced up, surprised to find him standing
there, waiting for her. It was proof of just how tired she was that she hadn't
sensed his presence, didn't know how to respond to his confrontational
greeting.

"What are you doing here, Shaun?"

"What am I doing here?" he echoed, his tone
a mixture of anger and incredulity. "I've been looking for you."

She stifled a yawn. "Why?"

"Because I tried calling you last night. All
night. And you never picked up the phone."

"I've been out all night," she said wearily.

"Obviously."

She frowned as she located the front door key on the
ring. "For some reason that seems to annoy you."

"For some reason that seems to surprise
you," he said sarcastically.

"Do you want to come inside and talk about this,
or would you like to continue yelling on the front lawn where all my neighbors
can overhear?"

His lips thinned as he came up the front steps. He
pulled the door open when she released the lock and stalked down the hall ahead
of her. He was waiting outside her apartment when she made her way up the
stairs, his expression murderous.

"I need caffeine," Arden said, automatically
moving into the kitchen to start brewing a fresh pot of coffee. The shower and
sleep would have to wait.