Matters of Circumstance (24 page)

“Have I ever said that you’re my best friend?” she said when they separated, lingering and slow. Naturally, Farrah was aware that she had never said such a thing before, but it felt like a good intro.

Neal’s eyebrows went up a little. “What are Ruby and Michael, chopped liver?”

She understood what he was getting at, but he hadn’t heard her side of it, either. “Don’t get me wrong: they’re awesome, incredible people and I’m lucky to know them, but they only come second.”

“Why?” He really didn’t seem to get it. She couldn’t figure how. He couldn’t event take a guess?

She was nervous; she was so nervous right now, she almost didn’t want to answer. But he deserved to know what she thought of him. She never expressed herself enough, and she didn’t want to make the same mistake that had almost gotten her sent to the doctor a week ago. Neal had always done so much for her, this was the least she could do for him.

“That’s a pretty long story,” she said, trying to ease herself into it. To maybe soothe herself, she began sifting her fingers through the hair on the back of his head. He didn’t mind, if the way he was gazing at her was any indication. She hoped not.

At his patient expression she forced herself to just
talk
already. This was so much easier than telling her father about her wings—this time the person already had to have some kind of an idea—and yet she was just as hesitant to get the words out.

“You’ve been there for me since the day we met, for starters,” she said.

“Except for—you know—the insignificant parts where you’re harassed by crazy magazine reporters and protected by the CIA.”

He was clearly trying to brush it off, but Farrah wasn’t going to have it. “You always listen to me, no matter how insane I sound or how freaked out I am, and when I’m done you make me see sense. Making sure I get through the aftermath means more to me than you being there for the incident itself,” she said in her best No Backtalk voice. “Ruby and Michael would never tolerate me if I acted like that, but you do.”

At this point Neal wasn’t trying to make light of the situation; he listened with undivided attention, his beautiful blue eyes grave.

Simultaneously flushing and emboldened, she made a point of blundering through the rest as quickly as possibly. Hands falling to her sides, she took a step back. He let her go with a slightly curious expression. Involuntarily, Farrah’s eyes became downcast and her voice got soft, but she hoped it wouldn’t lessen her intensity.

“And… we always have a good time together. You’re so easy to be around, you never stop supporting me, and I can talk to you about anything. I think I’ve talked to you more than I have to anybody in my life, but no matter what I say it doesn’t seem to change your opinion of me.” Then her head snapped up and she stared into him full-force. “Why
wouldn’t
you be my best friend?”

He did nothing at first, then Neal fidgeted and it became apparent that he was either totally uncomfortable or taken aback to the point of embarrassment. She hadn’t meant to do that to him, but… he still needed to know, right?

“When you put it like that I sound pretty amazing,” he mumbled, squirming again.

“I think s—” But then Farrah caught herself and said, “You have to admit that you go above and beyond the duty of a new boyfriend. I mean, most people are still kind of honeymooning at this stage.”

When he heard that Neal’s face broke into an unexpected grin. “Most people weren’t accidentally given wings by a twisted pediatrician, either,” he said humorously.

She smiled, too, because she couldn’t resist when she saw him. That was about when the slightly tense atmosphere disappeared and she stepped into his arms again. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to tell you that,” she said, resting her cheek on his collar. Her whole body was relaxed against him; he was… he was home.

“I got that impression,” he said lightly, touching his lips to her temple and causing her pulse to jump. “Thank you for the incredible ego boost.”

That was Neal: making jokes out of a serious situation. “That’s my line,” said Farrah, lifting her face to him again. “You’re always doing things for me; let me show my gratitude for once.”

His eyes got a little soulful. “Is that what all of this was for? Because you think you owe me something?”

“Yes. I thought you were enjoying yourself.” If he wasn’t Farrah didn’t know what she would do. Apologize a lot, she supposed.

“No! That’s not what I’m saying. I’ve loved this, Farrah,” he said, urgently trying to get her to understand. “I just… wasn’t expecting that to be the reason why, that’s all. I didn’t think you felt so strongly about it.”

“Trust me, I do.” She shut her eyes, gathering her resolve, and then opened them and looked Neal dead in the eye, hoping that her expression would communicate how serious she was about this. “Would it be crazy to say that I think I’m in love with you?”

For a while Neal looked like he didn’t know what hit him. Farrah’s cheeks became painfully warm as she waited for him to react. She meant it, and she couldn’t—didn’t want to—take it back, but what if
that
ruined things between them? She had never thought of that before, and it had to be the last thing she wanted.

“I won’t say I didn’t like hearing that, because that would be a lie,” he said carefully, restraint practically radiating from his suddenly tense body. “But don—don’t you think it’s a little early in life to be saying things like that?”

And perhaps it was a little weird, after all she had just said, but she did take the time to consider this. Eventually Farrah said, “What if that’s how I feel, in spite of it all? What if I decided that I didn’t care? Would that be crazy, too?”

For a moment the restraint became exponentially bigger, and then it disappeared completely. He put his hand on the side of her face, his thumb on the underside of her jaw, and tipped her up towards him. The look on his face was indescribable, but the tension had left him and in response she had never felt so energized. He just looked so
passionate
and
sexy
from this angle.

Neal’s other hand was stroking the skin in between her wings in the most provocative fashion. His lips were a hair’s breadth away from mashing into her, and when he spoke their closeness caused them to feather against each other. “If that’s crazy, then I’m insane too,” he murmured before discovering a perfect moment of his own and literally kissing her breath away.

The End

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