Mail Order Tiger Bride Wars: A Scorchingly Hot BBW Shifter Romance (10 page)

25

They rode to Brazzaville in the Range Rover.
Ellen was all questions, asking Cole about his parents.

“
Do you look like your father or mother?”

“Neither. I was adopted.”

“Seriously.”

“No.”

“No brothers and sisters?”

“Unfortunately . . . no.”

“Why do you say ‘unfortunately’?”

“Y
ou are a Curious Benjamin today.”

“Sorry.” Ellen was contrite.
“I get this way sometimes . . . when I’m not babbling.”

“No . . . you have every right to be curious. I say ‘unfortunately’ because
my parents have pinned all their hopes and dreams on me without anyone else to spread the weight of their misdirected expectations.”

Cole stopped short of saying ‘You’re lucky not to have parents like mine’, because Ellen wasn’t lucky. Not really. Her parents being alive w
ould have cushioned Terry’s cruelty and probably made Terry a lot less high maintenance than she was. It was when young people grew up unchecked and unchallenged . . .

Oh well.

Ellen cocked her head. “Are you talking about them making you marry a tiger shifter?”

She was incredibly perceptive.

“Yes.”

“
I don’t think you should do anything you don’t want to do. Like . . . if they are making you do this, then you shouldn’t be doing it. You know? I mean, I think you should be doing things for the right reasons. Like because
you
want to do them. Am I making any sense?”

“Yes,” he said. “You are making perfect sense.”

It was exactly the same conclusion he had reached himself. The beauty of it was that it was so simple . . . and yet the emotional repercussions from it were so nerve-wracking and brutal.

“So do you really want to marry me?” She said this in a very small voice
. Her face was averted to his, and yet she was not really looking at him, as though the full heat of his frontal (would be) rejection would be too excruciating to take in.

He stared at the road.

Did he really want to marry her?

She was sweet.
Impossibly sweet. He couldn’t get over the sweetness and adorable dorkiness of her.

He said, “Let’s get to Brazzaville.
Then I will tell you everything.”

26

Ellen was impossibly sad. But she was glad that Cole respected her enough to be totally honest with her.

Of course she had known it was something like this.

His father.
A specter that led to the series of events which culminated in her being here.

It’s not Cole’s fault.

You responded to the ad
.

You made the decision to stay with Cole.

And it’s not Cole’s fault your sister is a bitch
.

She said, “So if you don’t do what he says, he will pull out all funding from your dig?”

“Very likely, yes.”

“So you don’t want to marry me?”

Her heart clenched with visceral pain. But she had to hear this. It was part of growing up and knowing the truth, allowing it to hurt her, and yet being stronger for it.

He said, with much hesitation, “I’m not sure I’
m ready for marriage.”

A sharp stab pierced her
chest. That was the hurt. But with the hurt came the truth. She could see it on the way he firmed up his jaw on his side profile.

Now she must allow the strength that would soon steel her resolve to wash away the hurt.

But it was so hard!

“I’m sorry, Ellen. I’m telling you the truth. I’m very attracted to you.
I never thought I would be, but I am. When I’m with you, I’m happy. I look forward to every minute of time we spend together. I love having sex with you.”

He paused.

“
But I’m not sure I’m ready to be married.”

The pain
will pass, she willed herself. It will pass.

It was an effort for her to sp
eak.

“Thank you,” she said. “Thank you for being honest.”

“I’m sorry.”

He suddenly hit the brakes and veered the car to the side of the road. Thank goodness it wasn’t a busy road.

“Why did you do that?” she gasped.

“Because you look like you need a good cry.”

“I don’t.”

H
e raised his hand to touch her cheek. “You do.”

This broke her dam.
The tears which had threatened to spill now did so. In a deluge.

H
e took her in his arms. She cried and cried for all the pain she had been dealt and all the pain he had inflicted on her.

“I’m sorry,” he kept saying. “I’m sorry.”

“No. You are just being honest. I guess I’ve been wishing and wanting and hoping so hard to finally find someone who wants to be with me . . . and . . . and . . . ”

“You have. You have found someone who wants to be with you. I
’ve never lied about that. It’s true.”

He took her wet face in his hands and kissed her.

“You are special, you know that?”

‘N-n-not special enough.”

“That’s bullshit.” His eyes were very serious. “Do you love me, Ellen? Did you fall in love with me these past few weeks?”

He was honest, and so she saw no reason to be anything but.

“Yes.”

Now h
e was going to berate her for being stupid enough to fall for him.

He said softly, “
I’m not sure what falling in love would be like, but if it’s about wanting to be with you, looking forward to every minute I’m spending with you, and loving to have sex with you . . . then I’m not far off. But I need more time to decide if I want to get married. It’s all me. Not you. Please, please don’t think it’s about you.”

She nodded.

He’s just not that into . . . not me, but marriage
.

“I’ll be OK,” she promised him, wiping her eyes.

“I know you will. And I’ll be right beside you.”

27

They checked into a
plush hotel in what was meant to be their honeymoon suite. This was going to be a test of her resolve. Every single item around her – the bed, the walls, the drapes, the giant vase of pink and red roses on the dresser – was a testament of what wasn’t going to be.

But you can’t base a marriage on a lie, she reminded herself. And that was what it really was – a lie.

Yes, she took a gamble to come down here. Yes, she was a different person now. But if there was one thing she learned out of all this – it was

No expectations.

No regrets.

With that outlook, the bruises on her heart
started to numb and she started to feel better. Strange how things were so much in the frame of the mind. So she was able to admire the softness of the duvet with its eight hundred thread count and the red and white décor which bedecked everything without bursting into tears every few minutes.

Cole, oh Cole.

Oh, stop your caterwauling!

The first thing Cole did in the room was to go to the gargantuan bathroom to run a bath.

“You can never get really clean out in the pits,” he said.

She sat on the bed and looked out of the window. The cityscape of Brazzaville greeted her again with its blend of modernity and local culture. Later, she would go out and explore. Maybe even do a spot of shopping since her clothes were getting quite loose with all the digging she had been doing.

The sound of running wat
er trailed in through the bathroom door. Cole came back.

“I have a treat for you,” he said mysteriously.

He held a blindfold in his hand.

“A surprise?” she said.

“To make up for . . . everything. OK, I know I can’t make up for everything . . . but we’re still together here . . . in this suite. For as long as you want to stay.”

He held up the blindfold expectantly.

She had to smile. Might as well enjoy him for as long as they were together.

“OK,” she said.

He went behind her and wrapped the blindfold around her head.

“Comfy?” he said.

“Comfy.”

The blindfold was not very tight, and yet it was black and quite opaque.
It blocked out the light from the windows completely. The rest of her senses were heightened. Her hearing especially. And her sense of touch . . . or of being touched.

His hand brushed across the front of her neck.

“You trust me?” he murmured in her ear.

“I trust you.”

She felt his lips on her left ear, and then his teeth. He nibbled gently on the cup of her ear, and then inserted his tongue into it. The sensation was unlike anything she had ever experienced before. And yet, it was not ticklish. It was not very wet either. It was mostly erotic, and hot, and loving.

His tongue left her ear and trailed down the side of her neck.
The bristles of his permanent five o’clock shadow brushed against her skin, sending a delicious tingle into her core. He held her arms, and his hands crept to the front to slowly unbutton her shirt.

He did it very slowly while kissing and licking her neck, undoing each button as though it were a precious pearl.
His fingers were so gentle, so tender as he slid her shirt off her shoulders and arms and dropped it with a soft hiss on the floor.

She held her breath in anticipation.

His fingers went to her back – to the clasp of her bra. He undid it, and she felt the lightening of the bra’s confines on her flesh. Off came the straps, and her breasts were freed.

“I love your tits,” he said.

His hands were moving across her body, sliding across her heated flesh and onto the mounds of her breasts, puckering her nipples. Blood flew into her nipples and filled them out so that they became erect.

She felt his hot mouth latch onto
her left nipple. He sucked, and she felt her womb contract and her loins turn to mush. He sucked hard. She placed her hand on his head and sifted her fingers through his hair.

At the same time,
his fingers probed the zipper on her pants. Without taking his mouth off her nipple, he unzipped her and shrugged off her pants. Her pants got caught somewhere around her mid-thigh, and he lifted his mouth off her nipple and laughed softly.

“Let’s get you naked, shall we?”

“Yes.”

He left a patch of wetness on her left nipple. The air-conditioning in the room was actually at full blast, and she could feel the acute coolness on that area of her flesh.
He pulled her pants off her legs. She helped him. Then he slid off her panties.

“Stand still,” he said. “I want to look at you.”

Her skin tingled with anticipation as he took his hands off her. She could sense him inspecting her. Admiring her. She had lost weight, but that was not the point. He liked her body even when he first took her in the jungle, seemingly a lifetime ago.

“You are beautiful.” His pronouncement was reverent.

She flushed.

“Are you game for a little experimentation?” he said.

“What sort of experimentation?”

“It’s a surprise. But I won’t hurt you, I promise, and you can tell me you want to stop anytime you want.”

A delicious shiver ran down her spine.

“OK. I’m game.”

“Good.”

She waited as he busied himself with something.
When he returned, she could feel his heat on her back.

He took hold of her wrists and secured them semi-tightly
behind her back with a silk band. Her breath caught in her throat.

“Do you trust me?” he said.

“Y-yes.”

“Good. Walk with me.” He took hold of her arm. “I won’t let you fall.”

She walked to where he guided her. The carpet was very soft under her naked soles. The sound of running water got louder, and the hot humidity of the bathroom hit her skin like a balm.

She stepped onto the cool tiles.

“Don’t worry, it isn’t wet.” He told her.

Her helplessness and her total reliance on his guidance only served to
increase her anticipation and excitement.

“Raise your right leg.”

She did so, and he maneuvered it so that her toe dipped into the surface of the hot water.

“
Ohhh,” she said.

“It isn’t too hot, is it?
”

“No. But I got a shock, that’s all.”

“Don’t worry. I’m right here.”

She put her
entire leg into the tub, and the water came up to above her knee. He helped the rest of her body in. Then he immersed her in the water fully until it was up to her chest.

“Comfy?”

She felt a little unbalanced with her hands tied behind her back. Her buttocks slid on the smooth porcelain surface of the massive bathtub, but he steadied her. She could tell from the displacement of the water that he had gotten in too. And she could hear bubbles popping around her. The crack-crack-crackle of fizz.

Oh wow, she was in a bubble bath!

He was immediately all over her – kissing her lips and jawline and neck and breasts profusely. His hands were all over her too, squeezing her tits and buttocks and thighs, and delving into the leaves of her pussy.

He stubbed two fingers into her pussy, and she moaned. The sensation here was different than when he had done it outside the water.
Her whole body felt floaty. Vulnerable. Warm. His fingers thronged the tunnel of her pussy deeply, widening the passage and moving in and out. Her juice came out copiously, but she couldn’t feel them because of the water.

She loved it when he did this.
His fingers were so sure and swift and purposeful.

Then she felt his body against hers.
His hands spreading her thighs in the water. Her hands, helpless behind her. Helpless to prevent him from doing anything he wished to her.

“Do you want this?” he asked her.

“Yes.”

Could she even contemplate the word ‘no’?

He held her legs apart as his cock penetrated her pussy.

“
Ohhhhh,” she cried.

It felt different in the water, and it certainly felt different
with her hands bound behind her back.

He began a slow fuck.
In the water, the sensations were dulled and yet magnified. Like in slow motion. She could not grip him in any way, and so she had to just lie back in his embrace and let him have his way with her.

His cock pummeled and stroked her sensuously.
Her body juddered in the water with each hammer. Water splashed on her face and lips. She opened her eyes to regard his face. He was staring at her, and his eyes were full of love.

Love
.

W
as she wrong? Was she in some ecstasy-fuelled haze where she interpreted everything in the way that she wanted to see it? He already said he wasn’t ready to be married. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t love her.

Right?

This love thing between men and women was such a muddle to her. All she knew was that her feelings for Cole were very real and sincere. She did love him. And it didn’t matter if he wasn’t ready to commit, because it didn’t detract from how she felt about him. In that true sense, she had grown up as a person.

“Ellen,” he murmured.

She blinked.

“Look at me.” His hand stroked her jaw.

She looked.

He leaned over to kiss her, and her pussy
combusted as his cock angled in to stroke her G-spot. She opened her mouth to cry out her orgasm, and he sealed his mouth over hers to capture her breath.

“
Ohhhhh!”

Something jetted into her pussy amid the
warm, swirling water. His precious seed, filling her.

She collapsed on him as the water splashed all around them and onto the floor tiles. They had truly made a torrid mess.

When they had both come down to earth, he stroked her wet hair back.

“You OK?” he said.

The band was beginning to chafe her wrists, and so he undid her bonds.

“Yes.” Tears came into her eyes. “I love you, Cole. I just wanted you to hear
me say that. I didn’t say it to make you feel guilty or anything. But I just wanted to say it just in case I don’t get the chance to say it again.”

He visib
ly flinched.

H
e said, “I want to be able to say it back to you, Ellen. But I can’t. Not right now. When I say it, I want to be really sure about it. I’m sorry.”

“D
on’t be. I didn’t say it because I wanted you to say it back to me.” She meant it too. Her heart was squelching with so much hope and yet not hope because it was painful and sad and deflating and sobering at the same time.

“I know.” He clasped her hands in the water. “And I meant it when I said that it’s all me. It isn’t you.”

“I know.”

“I’ll figure it out,” he promised. “And when I do, it will be the truth.”

Now why did that scare her so?