Mad About the Hatter (17 page)

Henry was keenly aware they were holding hands, and from the look on Hatter’s face, he was too. Henry wondered why the thought of leaving Hatter behind bothered him so much.

I can think about it later, like Hatter said,
Henry thought, tightening his grip on Hatter’s hand. “For now, all we should be concerned about is the Red Queen, and how we’re going to overthrow her without losing our heads.”

But thinking about their kiss was so much more fun than pondering war strategies, and soon all thoughts of the Red Queen were pushed out of Henry’s head, replaced with the memory of warm lips, garlic breath, and bolts of lightning zinging through his body.

T
HE
FOLLOWING
morning, the rising sun found them already gathered in Alice’s kitchen for breakfast and a strategy meeting. Alice’s husband, Phillip, and the children were the only ones absent, most likely still asleep at the ungodly hour.

Leonard had dressed in his full Red King regalia, presumably the same wardrobe he’d been wearing when he’d gone through the mirror with Alice into Henry’s world. A small golden crown studded with rubies encircled the crown of his head. He wore a longish tunic of deep crimson, with matching leggings and knee-high boots. A heavy cape of bright red velvet trimmed with white, black-tipped ermine tails, thrown over his shoulders, made him look twice as broad as he actually was, and swept the floor behind him in a short train. He would’ve looked quite regal if it hadn’t been for Alice’s cats, Romeo and Juliet, who chased after the robe’s fur-trimmed train, jumping and clawing at it. Perhaps they thought it was a rival cat, or more likely, just fun. Either way, Leonard found it necessary to flick the edges of his robe continually, trying to shake them loose. He finally solved the problem by taking a seat at the table and piling his robe on the chair next to him. The cats jumped up on the windowsill and stared at him, obviously irritated.

Alice placed carafes of piping hot coffee and tea on the table, along with a platter of scrambled eggs and another of crispy bacon. She added yet another plate piled high with toast, and set a few small jars of jams and jellies on the table before taking a seat herself. “Well, we’re all here. What are your plans, Your Majesty?”

Leonard helped himself to the fluffy yellow eggs and a few strips of bacon, before passing the platters on to Hatter. “Well, providing the mirror allows us to return to the White Castle, and doesn’t dump us off in the middle of the Great Sinking Sands, or the Endless Sugar Sand Desert, our first priority will be to find our way to the Red Castle.”

“What do you mean? The mirror sent Alice to the White Castle, and you and us here from there. Why shouldn’t it send us back again?” Henry asked around a mouthful of toast and orange marmalade.

“Depends on whether the Red Queen had the mirror moved.” Hatter poured himself another cup of tea, and added a dollop of cream. “It sent Alice to the White Castle and us to here from the same place because that’s where the twin mirrors are located. If the Red Queen had the Wonderland mirror removed from the White Castle and dumped, say, into the middle of the Neverglades, then when we step through we’ll find ourselves up to our rear ends in tree sharks and swamp trolls.”

Leonard nodded. He buttered a piece of toast, stuck several slices of bacon and a wad of scrambled eggs onto it, folded it in half, and took a huge bite. He waited to speak until after he’d swallowed, and although he dabbed his lips with a napkin, breadcrumbs and bacon bits still dotted his beard. “All too true, Hatter. Let’s hope it remains in the White Castle, or better yet, that my wife had it moved to the Red Castle, which would save us quite a bit of time and effort.”

“My guess is she’s left it where it is, and perhaps has it guarded,” Alice put in. “You’ll excuse me, Your Majesty, but the Red Queen was never known for being very bright or having much initiative.”

“That’s quite all right, Alice. I agree.” Leonard’s eyes took on a somewhat dreamy, faraway look, as though he were seeing images Alice, Henry, and Hatter couldn’t, something from his past. “When she was young, she was quite beautiful, you know, and could be extremely charming when it suited her. Her laugh was contagious, and her kisses were sweeter than anything the Confection Mountain Bakers could whip up. I did marry her, after all. However, the years weren’t kind to her. We never had children, although we wanted heirs, of course. She hated the idea that her crown might go to someone other than a direct descendant of her bloodline, and grew bitter and jealous, and more ruthless and despicable with each passing day. I discovered there was something twisted in her soul, something wicked that once unleashed, grew unchecked, while at the same time every shred of decency and humor she once held shriveled and died away.” He blinked, and looked at Alice, Henry, and Hatter in turn. “She’s no longer the woman I married. She’s become a monster, and she must be stopped before she finally destroys Wonderland.”

“How?” Henry asked. “How do we stop her?” He hadn’t thought about the Red King and Queen as a married couple, as his own parents must have been once upon a time, before his mother died and his father began to drink. It put a new spin on his opinion of the Red Queen. It didn’t exactly change what he thought of her—he still agreed she was a monster and needed to be stopped before she cut the heads off everyone in Wonderland—but he realized she was, after all, only human. Or what passed for human in Wonderland, anyway.

“That would be the question, sire.” Hatter set his cup down in the saucer with a gentle ting. “She, herself, poses no physical threat, but she does still command the Red Guards. While most of them are getting a bit old, there’re still plenty of good stomping years left in them. The three of us couldn’t possibly overcome them all.”

“We won’t have to.” Leonard reached up and tapped the golden crown on his head. “I am still the Red King, am I not? The Red Guards are mine to command.”

Hatter gave a little shrug and averted his eyes. “Well, sire, you did sort of disappear into thin air. Most of Wonderland believes you dead, and the rest think you abdicated and ran off with one of the chambermaids.”

Leonard’s eyes grew wide, and his cheeks reddened. “Nonsense! I am obviously quite alive, and I never ran away. I was on… er, sabbatical. I certainly never renounced my throne.”

“Oh, I believe you, sire,” Hatter was quick to say. “The problem is how to convince the Red Guards of it.”

Henry contemplated the problem. He wasn’t so sure Leonard hadn’t run away. In fact, he was quite sure that was exactly what Leonard had done. So, how did one go about convincing an army to follow a leader they believed abandoned them? The answer came to him like a poke from a sharp stick. He actually jumped. “Of course! By explaining that Leonard’s leaving was necessary to overthrow the Queen.”

The other’s looked at him with blank, confused expressions. Finally Hatter gestured for Henry to continue. “Explain, please. I’m afraid we’re all a bit confuzzled at your strategy. How, exactly, was it necessary for the Red King to leave Wonderland to the Red Queen’s fits of temper?”

Henry tried to explain. “Suppose there was something in this world that the Red King needed, something that would assure him of victory over the Red Queen. He needed to leave to get it, but always intended to return.”

“So, you think the best way to gain the Red Guards’ trust is to lie to them? Henry, I’m ashamed of you.” Alice scowled at him, as only a big sister was able.

Ordinarily that look would make Henry squirm, but not this time. He knew he was right. “No, you don’t understand! He did come here to find something he needed to face the Queen—his courage, his pride, and his resolve.” Henry smiled and patted Leonard on the arm. “After living with the Red Queen’s madness for all those years, you simply lost your way, Your Majesty. You needed to come here to find it again.”

Hatter laughed and slapped the table with his hand, making his cup rattle in its saucer. “That’s brilliant, Henry! You wouldn’t be lying at all, sire, and knowing the Red Queen, I doubt anyone would fault you for it.”

“You don’t think it would be admitting failure?” Leonard chewed his lower lip, making his beard bob. “A king can’t appear to be weak.”

“Admitting a truth, even when it’s painful, is never a failure, Your Majesty.” Alice’s smile was gentle. “It’s a strength, one that not many people have.”

“So is learning from your mistakes and overcoming them,” Henry added.

Hatter nodded. “I agree most wholeheartedly, Your Majesty. I believe the Red Guards would understand and respect such an admission.”

Leonard seemed to think it over, then sighed and placed his napkin over his plate. “I suppose, then, that we’ll have to… “ He looked at Alice. “How do they say it here, Alice? Fly it?”

Alice chuckled and shook her head. “I think the phrase you’re looking for is ‘wing it,’ sire.”

“Oh, yes. Wing it. Indeed. We shall have to wing it when we get there.” Leonard smiled gratefully at Alice. “I want to thank you, my dear, for allowing me to tag along with you to your world, and for finding me a place and protecting my identity for all these years. Time certainly flew by us, hmm?”

“Well sure, when Time likes you.” Hatter said. He glanced at Henry, who snickered when Hatter rolled his eyes. “But get on Time’s bad side just once, and it’ll stick you in a never-ending Tea Party with a psychotic dormouse.”

“Hatter!” Alice admonished, shaking her finger in mock anger at him. “Shame on you. Dormouse was not psychotic. He was just a bit… er, shy and retiring.”

“Shy and retiring?” Hatter threw his head back and laughed. “You should have heard him after you left the party, Alice. His language was so blistering, it set the centerpiece on fire.”

“Well,” Alice said, “maybe he was a bit peculiar. But then again, I was a petulant, obnoxious child, wasn’t I?”

Hatter stood up, and tamped his hat on his head, his lips tilted in a wry smile. “I have learned it is never prudent to argue with a Queen, former or otherwise.”

Everyone laughed, although the joke wasn’t all that funny. Henry supposed it felt good because it provided a release of the tension that had been slowly building. He was acutely aware, as he was sure everyone else was, of the danger of their plan.

They didn’t know for sure where the mirror would lead them, or if the Red Guards would be waiting, and if so, if the guards would accept Leonard’s claim to the throne. Indeed, they didn’t know if Leonard would be able to make the claim before the guards shot them all full of arrows.

Even if they did land in the White Castle, and the Red Guards accepted Leonard as King, they would still have trials to face on the march back to the Red Castle, and the final confrontation with the Queen promised to be anything but pleasant.

Henry put down his cup and did something he hadn’t done in years. He took Alice in his arms and hugged her tight. “I love you, Sis. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you before, and for being such a jackass about it.”

To his surprise, there were tears in Alice’s eyes when she finally pulled away from his embrace. “I know, and I’m sorry for being so stubborn about everything, and for sending you to Wonderland unprepared.”

“It’s okay,” Henry said. “It’s been an adventure, for sure. When I get back, I plan to make it up to you. I promise.”

“Sure.” The threatening tears escaped, rolling slowly down Alice’s cheek, although a tremulous smile played at her lips. “When you get back.”

Henry frowned. Why did he get the feeling Alice didn’t think he’d be coming back? He shook himself.
Don’t be stupid. Of course she believes you’ll return. It’s the stress, that’s all. Everyone’s on edge
. He returned her shaky smile, and stepped back as the others said their good-byes.

Alice led them up the stairs to the second floor of the house, cautioning them to keep quiet so they didn’t wake her husband and children. She reached for a pull chain in a panel of the hallway ceiling, pulling down a drop-ladder to the attic.

They climbed it, one after another, and Henry and Hatter found themselves back in the spacious, pitch-roofed loft where they’d first arrived. Boxes, bags, and a few trunks were stored on the far side of the wall. A dressmaking model stood bare, a fine layer of dust its only covering. An ancient sewing machine cabinet, the rocking chair missing a few spindles, and several dusty toys took up the rest of the floor space. In one corner a tall, flat object stood alone and apart from the other clutter.

Alice gestured toward the mirror, twin to the one he and Hatter had gone through in the White Castle. She stepped to the side, and smiled a smile she clearly didn’t feel. “Here it is. Good luck, and Godspeed. Promise to find a way to tell me how it works out.”

“What are you talking about? I’ll tell you all about it when I get back.” Henry frowned, and felt a shiver dance up his spine. Didn’t Alice believe he’d return?

That same shaky smile returned to lift Alice’s lips again. “Of course. How silly of me. I love you, little brother.”

“Love you too,” Henry replied, still puzzled.

“Well, we’d better get going.” Hatter swept off his hat and bowed deeply. “Many thanks, Alice, for everything.”

“And thank you, Hatter, for seeing my brother through Wonderland. Give my best to Caterpillar and the Cheshire Cat.” Alice kissed Hatter on the cheek.

“Bah, the Cat? He deserves a swift boot up his furry rear, not a thank-you,” Hatter huffed. “Never met a more contrary, frustrating beast in my life.”

Alice waved off his concerns. “Oh, give him a chance. Something tells me you’ll change your mind.”

Hatter sniffed and raised his chin. “Not likely. He’s all claws and teeth, held together with spite and an evil sense of humor.” He stepped aside for Leonard to bid Alice a last good-bye.

“Take care of them, Uncle.” She threw her arms around Leonard’s neck and hugged him. “I know you’re the Red King, but you’ll always be Uncle Leonard to me as well.”

Leonard hugged her back, tears glimmering in his eyes. “The honor is mine, dear Alice. You are the daughter I never had. I shall miss you, but who knows? Perhaps someday I’ll return for a visit, or you’ll come to Wonderland.”