Loving Heart (The Broken Heart Series Book 3) (11 page)

“Thank you. I’d feel safer if you were there anyway. But, we’re not together. I still want a divorce.” His eyes widened. “Will you see Dr. Logan with me?” I whispered.

“A divorce? Can we hold off on that? Please.” He pleaded with his eyes. “Yes. Yes, I will see Dr. Logan with you.” he answered.

The drive to the apartment was silent but filled with promise. There was something different about Michael and I was hoping it was the beginning of what I was looking for…peace.
We walked into the apartment building, staring at each other like two strangers. The baby was moving…a lot. I smiled just thinking about him fluttering inside of me. As we walked through the front door of our apartment, bouquets of yellow roses filled the foyer. I glanced over at Michael who was turning on the lamp in the living room.

“Michael?”

“Yeah?” he answered as he plopped himself on the couch.

“This is wrong.” I leaned my head against the wall.

“One step at a time.” he said softly.

“I don’t know how to take that first step.” I shook my head. He stood up and walked towards me placing his hands around me leaning them against the wall. He hovered over me, his face so close to mine, I could feel his breath on my lips.

“This is the first step, Jenesis.” He placed his lips on mine tenderly. I closed my eyes and lifted my hands to cup his face. He parted his lips and slipped his tongue into my mouth. I could feel the warm moisture between my legs on my lace panties. His touch alone made me wet. I kissed him back and our tongues whirled in each other’s mouths. It felt so good to kiss him, to feel him, to swallow him. So much happened in one day; my life was spiraling out of control and I didn’t know how to get it back. He pulled away from me suddenly.

“Jenesis, we need to take a break.” he whispered. My heart sank into my stomach. I released his face from my hands.

“Okay, whatever you feel is necessary to make this work.” I lied through my teeth. I wanted to cry but I held it in.

“I’m leaving tomorrow for California.” He pushed himself off of the wall.

“California? What’s in California?”.

“I have a case. We need the money. Things have been slow since the Marquis case.”

“What about me and the baby?”  I walked over to the couch in the living.

“I spoke to Dr. Logan. You’re staying with her until I come back.” he said confidently.

“Oh, well, I guess you have everything planned out.” I shrugged my shoulders and sat like an Indian on the couch.

“It’s just for two weeks. We need the money.” His voice was low and saddened.

“What if I told you I didn’t want you to go?” I stood up and approached him. He stared at me; his eyes locked with mine. I didn’t want him to leave, but he looked like he already made up his mind.

Michael   

“Jenesis, it’s time for me to grow up and take responsibility for what I’ve done. If I don’t keep my promise to you, then I’m the same person I was before. I love you, Jenesis, I love you so much.” My voice was trembling and I could feel the lump in my throat growing thicker. I wasn’t a sucker. I didn’t want to cry, but something deep down inside of my soul needed to be released, and that’s exactly what happened.  I stared into her beautiful hazel eyes and gently placed my forehead against hers. I held her gently in my arms and I began to cry.
What man cries?
I thought to myself. I tried to hold it in, but I couldn’t. It just took over. I sobbed into her hair and she began to cry on my shoulder. I cried so hard that my body jolted up and down; I was crying from my gut.

“Jenesis, help me, please help me.” I whispered.

“Michael? What is it? What’s wrong?” She said as she wiped her own tears.

“I don’t want to be like…
him
.” She wiped my tears with her hands.

“You’re nothing like him.” She whispered. She was lying to me. I knew what I was and I…
was a monster
. I placed my head on her lap, leaning my big body on the couch sobbing uncontrollably. My body was shaking. My hands were clenched on her inner thighs. My pain was so real; I didn’t think it could feel worse than the day Dave killed my mother in front of me; or the day I watched him rape my wife. No one understood the extent of my pain. All she sees is a man who helped his father kill women. If she really only knew…

She grabbed my hair gently and lifted my head off of her lap. She cupped my face into her hands.

“Promise me something?” She kissed my forehead.

“Anything.” I whimpered as I lowered my eyes to the floor.

“Love me, love us, unconditionally, the way that I love you. Don’t question my love for you and don’t question the love between us and this baby. This baby is not Dave’s. It’s not. I can feel it” She stared at me hard trying to convince me that all I needed to do was believe her. I raised my eyes to her.

“What about Nick?” my voice trembled with anger.

“What about him?” she answered.

“Do you love him? Did you ever love him?” I shook my head to get rid of the thought.

“Of course not.” She released my face from her hands. “I can never love anyone but you.” She whispered.

“I don’t deserve you.” I slid my fingers through my hair knowing damn well I didn’t. I ruined her life. It’s just unforgivable.

“You do. You do because I love you.” She kissed my lips then held me in her arms. Her cell phone vibrated, the sound of a text message coming through echoed in the hallway. “Let me see who that is.” She let me go then walked over into the hallway.

“Who is it?” I asked walking over to her.

She scooped up the cell phone from the table, typed in her code and read text message.

“Who is it?”

She almost dropped the phone when I asked.

“No one.” She replied. But, it was too late it was written all over her face and I knew something on that phone had shocked her.

“Give it to me…
please
.” I said as I slid the phone gently out of her hands. “put the code in,” I asked softly.

“Michael, this isn’t necessary.” She said as she tried to grab the phone out of my hand.

“Jenesis, no more lies. You promised.” I said sternly. She typed in the code without removing the phone from my hand. The message popped up and my lips parted in awe as I read it.

Today, 7:49 PM

Jenesis, Michael is lying. He’s lying to you. He knew everything Dave was doing. He’s in on it. Trust me. You don’t know what you’re dealing with. He’s a murderer. A killer. Like his father.

“What the fuck is this?” I said through gritted teeth. “You gave this piece of shit your number?” I said angrily.

“He always had my number.” She said as her voice quivered.

“Do you believe what he wrote?” I asked. I was livid as I walked over to the kitchen. I wanted to punch something. But I had to stay calm. She would be frightened and I didn’t want to frighten her. She walked behind me in the hopes that I would calm down, so I did my best to do that. The phone’s text message sound went off again in my hand. I looked down at the phone that was in my grasp. My heart stopped for a moment, I felt my face flush. I stood staring at the phone, then I looked up at her. I handed her the phone and as she reached out to grab it from me I grabbed her hand.

“What is it Michael?” I whispered.

“Read it.” I said softly. She grabbed the phone and read the message.

Today, 7:54PM

Jenesis, the results are in. I am your father.

Joe

She placed the phone slowly on the kitchen table. She looked up at me and walked out towards the hallway. At that moment I didn’t know what to do. I just stared at her thinking, this is either the best or the worse day of her life.

                               
 
Jenesis        Chapter 9

“Jenesis?” Michael called out to me.

I stood against the wall with a ball of my childhood memories choking me at the back of my throat. The tears were brimming to the surface of my eyes but I refused to let them spill over. I’ve cried so much; I didn’t want to cry anymore. Maybe this could be a positive experience. Maybe I could find the love that I had with Dave with Joe. Michael approached me and I put my hand up in the air to stop him.

“I’m okay. I’m okay.” I whispered.

“Jenesis, I’m sorry.” he placed his hand on my shoulder.

“I want to see him.” I said as I glanced up into his eyes.

“Let’s do it.” he said without hesitation.

“Alone, I want to see him
alone.
” he nodded his head as I sent Joe a text message.

I’d like to meet. Can we meet tonight? I can’t wait until the morning.

Jenesis

As I finished typing the text I heard a faint knock on the door. Michael’s head turned suspiciously towards the door.

“I’ll get it.” he walked towards the door and turned the knob slowly while looking over at me. He opened the door and to my surprise Joe was standing there with white orchids in his hands. My face froze. My heart hammered against my chest when I saw the flowers.  I felt a stab in my heart and Michael knew why. Michael stood staring at him with pure hate in his eyes.

“Michael?” He extended his hand out.

“Can you leave the orchids outside?” he motioned with his hands.

“Sure,”

“She’s allergic.” Michael said quickly. “Please, come in.” He stepped out of the way to let Joe in.

“Jenesis, my sweet, Jenesis. I’m so happy.” He held out his arms to hug me.

“Joe?” I whispered. Michael knew exactly what I was thinking. He knew I was scared, terrified at the idea that the man standing in front me was my father.
How was I supposed to greet him? How was I supposed to call him dad?
I was shaking internally and I could feel the baby twisting and turning with excitement. He had a grandfather. His
real
grandfather. I walked over to Joe and slipped my arms around his waist. He kissed the top of my head and inhaled deeply over my hair.

“I’ve waited so long for this. I’ve waited twenty-three years to hold you like this; To tell you that I love you. You’ve always been my little girl. I’m so sorry we didn’t tell you before. I’m so sorry.” I could feel his chest heaving in and out and I could see the storm of emotions ready to explode from his face. And he did, he busted into tears and lost control. “I loved your mother, I loved her so much…I just can’t believe she’s gone.” He sobbed as he covered his face with his hands. Michael escorted him to the living room to sit on the couch.  I held my stomach as he mentioned my mother. I was angry at her, yet, I had no reason to be. She always wanted to protect me. My baby fluttered within me and I rubbed my belly gently. I caught Michael staring at me and he smiled bringing me the warmness in my heart I needed to feel right at that very moment. I looked over at Joe. I wanted to hold on to Joe forever and never let him go. Now that I knew he was my real father, I felt relieved.

I walked over to the couch and sat by Joe. He finally removed his hands from his face, looked at me then cried on my shoulder. Michael walked over to the kitchen and came back with three beers and handed one to Joe. Joe grabbed the beer and whimpered as he sucked down the beer leaving little air between his clogged nose and giant gulps.

“Well, congratulations you guys!” Michael shouted as he saluted us with his beer in his hand. We both looked up at him, our swollen and tearful eyes meeting his. Michael shrugged his shoulders quickly and sat down on the opposite couch chugging down a beer quickly while we stared at him in shock. I shook my head at Michael.

“Joe, please, try and calm down.” I said softly hoping he would calm down and take a breath.

“I’m sorry. I just feel so…hurt.” he answered. He slurped down the rest of his beer and wiped his nose with his sleeve. “May I use your bathroom?”

“Sure, down the hall to your left” Michael replied. “Jenesis, this is great news, right?”

“I’m not sure. I’m still in shock. So many questions that need to be answered; How did Dave know about all of this, surely, he needed to know someone?” I leaned my head against the couch trying to gather my thoughts. It didn’t make sense.
How could Dave know something so personal like this about my family?

Joe returned from the bathroom and stood by the living room entrance. We heard a knock at the door and Joe walked over to answer it.

“It’s probably Kate. I invited her over. I hope you don’t mind.” he shouted as he opened the door. The shots that rang out sounded like firecrackers and Michael and I automatically hit the floor and crawled to each other. Michael made me hide behind the couch.

“Stay here.” he whispered as he placed his hand over my mouth. My body was trembling and my hands were sweating.