Love Story for a Snow Princess (Siren Publishing Classic) (9 page)

She lingered over that detail, mesmerized by the word
disfigured
. She knew, without any doubt that if she asked him to describe himself, he would specifically say that word. As she shut down the computer, she wondered what part of Paden was disfigured.

* * * *

He walked into Suinnak’s the next night, making her stop in mid-step. It was near closing time, and the usual crop of patrons had slowly started to trickle out, leaving only two customers behind. Instead of taking his usual seat at his usual table, he walked right up to Thea and planted himself in front of her.

“I’d like to talk to you,” he stated.

“Well, I don’t want to talk to you,” she replied. “If you want your dinner, then sit down and Miki can get it for you.”

She went to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm. She hated that as soon as he touched her, tingling sensations shot up her arm. As he leaned into her, causing his breath to fan across her face, his nearness caused her heart to thump. And it thumped with excitement instead of dread, darn it all.

“Please, Thea,” he said.

She met his gaze. Within the green depths he pleaded with her, begging without words. Something dark flittered through his eyes, and it took Thea a few minutes to realize he was nervous.

Nervous she wouldn’t talk to him?

“Miki,” she called out. “Do you mind if I leave early?”

“No, go ahead,” Miki answered, and her gaze darted between Paden’s tense stand and Thea’s insecure one. “You two all right?”

“Just ducky,” Thea mumbled, taking off her apron. She frowned, remembering something. “Hang on, I have to get something.”

She disappeared for a few minutes, rushing out the kitchen door to the back that led to the stairs to the apartment above. When she came back down a moment later, Paden waited with her coat.

He helped her put on her coat, being gentlemanly by making sure she bundled up warmly and holding the door open for her as they exited. She slipped on her goggles as he led her to his snowmobile and held tightly to his back as he sped through the night toward his home.

The fire was banked inside the house and it only took a few minutes to have it blazing with warmth. She took off her gear and laid it on the floor since there was no place to hang anything, then warmed her hands in front of the fire.

“Would you like something to drink?” he asked her, his nervousness still apparent in his tone.

She shook her head. He sighed, ran a hand through his hair, and went into the kitchen. A few minutes later he brought out two chairs for them to sit on.

“Thank you,” he said to her as he watched her sit down.

“For what?”

“For coming. I know I must seem erratic.”

She raised her eyebrows, her only acknowledgement of his statement.

“I just couldn’t leave it on what you must be thinking of me,” he started. “I mean, I never meant to put you in the middle of something you have no idea about—”

“Why are you so cold?” she whispered, interrupting him. “You’re like an animal with a thorn in its paw. Ever since I’ve met you, you’ve pulled me in and then pushed me away and yet every time you’re near me I can feel…”

“Go on,” he urged, his body bracing as if he were waiting for a verbal attack.

“I think you hate me.”

His startled expression made it clear that wasn’t what he was expecting. He gave a strangled snort of amusement. “Why would I hate you?”

“Because I think I make you feel something.”

He leaned over and rested his elbows on his knees, his body hunching over as if he were trying to fold in on himself. He looked like he was in pain. She felt his pain, heard it in his voice. Unknowingly, he had dropped his guard for a tiny bit, and she saw a side of him that surprised her, a hurt that discolored his soul. She rose from the chair and walked slowly to him, reaching up to caress his hard jaw.

“You’re…hard to touch. There’s a wall that you present to the world, and everyone is kept behind it. Yet once in a while, I see a glimpse of a man full of something more, something brighter, and my heart aches for that man.”

He was breathing harshly, as if he had just run a long distance. “Thea, please stop.”

“Do you want me to go?”

“Yes! No!” He groaned. “I’m so confused.”

“Well, you brought me here. So no more running.” She clasped both of her hands around his. “What is it, Paden? Whatever it is, can you just let it go and talk to me?”

“Let it go? Can you let it go, Thea? Your great, fantastic life. Don’t think I don’t realize what gives you nightmares.” He abruptly pulled away from her and stood, putting space between them. “You think you can walk into my memories and figure out all there is to know about me?” As soon as the words left his mouth his eyes widened. “Damn it,” he muttered and ran a hand through his hair.

“You’re yelling at me,” she said calmly, “because I’ve hit a nerve. I think I’ve been hitting that nerve a lot lately. All right Paden, yes, my life was great, and I had a great family, but they’re dead now. And I may have come to Alaska to run from it, but at least I want to keep on living. But what about you? Is this you?” She flung open her arms to encompass the empty room. “There’s nothing here, Paden! Is this what’s inside of you? Nothing?”

He didn’t answer. A minute went by, then two. Thea became frustrated with him. She was done banging her head against a wall. She turned away and started putting her winter garb back on.

“My first memory is of being on water,” he suddenly said, out of the blue, so low she barely heard him at all. “All my life I’ve been connected to it. Yet, much as it filled my blood then, now it turns my heart cold.”

He fell silent again, thinking. She waited, her hand on the zipper of her coat.

“As a boy, I thought the ocean was limitless, endless, full of possibilities. In the end…it just made me sick.”

She took off her coat and dropped it. “What happened?”

“Captivity.”

“What?” she asked, shock leaking into her voice.

He sighed and shut his eyes for a brief moment. When he opened them, raw pain radiated from them. “My father is the founder and chief designer of Navires Yachts, one of the most exclusive and expensive shipbuilders in the world. The headquarters of his company are in Miami, where the majority of the boats are made.”

“You’re an heir to a yachting dynasty?” she asked dubiously.

“To me, it was a normal life,” he replied, matter-of-factly. “My parents never really acted like we were some of the richest people in the world. Which, I suppose, made me an easy target.”

“What type of target?”

“Kidnapping. Ransom.” He said the words flatly, but she could hear the horror in them, just as she could feel the horror of their meaning sink in. “I was taken one day from school.”

She didn’t say anything when he fell silent, only kept her eyes focused on him. She let him gather his thoughts to continue on his own.

“He kept me on a boat. Day after day the boat simply sailed, constantly in motion. My father paid the money, but they didn’t return me. The head kidnapper held out because he wanted more. Always more.”

“How long?” she whispered.

“Ten months.”

She walked up to him and took hold of his hand. He held it tightly and looked at her with dark, bruised eyes. “That’s the most horrible thing I’ve ever heard. They were never able to find you?”

“On a boat it’s easy to sail around, dock at some marina for a while. No questions asked. Eventually I was found because somebody saw me one day, chained. I don’t know, they must have seen through a curtain or something. Anyway, I got rescued. But, I wasn’t the same.” He blew a harsh breath out of his lungs. “After, I couldn’t stand being on a boat. I hated looking at the marinas. God, I haven’t talked about this in ten years. And I swore I’d never do so again, but I couldn’t with you. I saw your eyes and I knew…”

“You knew what?”

“That you went through it, too, being utterly destroyed inside.”

Her breath hitched in her throat, and she couldn’t take her eyes off him.

“I wanted to let you know,” he whispered, “that it’s not you. I’m still not right, Thea. Something is dark and hateful inside, and it makes me do hurtful things. I just want you to know that I…care about you, but I’m not a very nice person.”

His face was turned away from her, his jaw locked in place, as if afraid he’d say something more. He looked so lost to her, so defeated that it broke her heart. Without thinking, she reached up to grab his face and bring it back to hers. She stood on tiptoe to make sure he saw her as she spoke.

“I’m not scared of you, Paden,” she whispered. “Whatever darkness is inside you doesn’t scare me.”

She kissed him on the lips, softly, once and then twice, pressing her mouth against the seam of his. Then she rubbed her cheek against his, and his composure broke. His arms came around her and he pulled her into him, almost crushing her as he found her lips with his.

She opened for him, and his tongue swept in, allowing him to take from her whatever he needed. His kiss was possessive, dominant yet tender, a heady combination that sent her senses spinning. She slipped her arms around him, hugging his waist, feeling the strength rippling through him, and a little moan escaped her throat.

Immediately, he swept her up into his arms, not breaking the contact with his mouth. He carried her, though she was hardly aware of where they went. She was half conscious to going up to his loft, where the only light came from the glow of the fireplace below. He laid her in the middle of his bed, falling upon her, cradled between her legs.

His hands roved over her body, not giving her a chance to protest even if she wanted to. But she didn’t. He unzipped her pants and his hand slipped inside, under her panties, to find the slickness of her pussy. One finger slid in and she moaned, lifting her hips to help him ease in further. His thumb rubbed her clit, teasing the nub while another finger also pushed in. In and out he rubbed, up and down. Her body tightened, and she panted, her hips bucking against the fingers driving her crazy.

Then he pulled back, finally breaking his kiss to trail over her cheek, down her chin to her neck. His hand left her slit. She moaned in protest and shifted her hips higher, pressing against his hardness. But he tugged at her shirt, hurrying to unbutton it to reveal her thermal undershirt. For the next few moments it was all about getting her naked.

Once she lay before him, exposed, he took a moment to stare at her while running a hand over her skin, over her breasts, teasing the nipples to pucker. Thea shifted restlessly, arching her back to get him to touch her more.

His fingers trailed down, over the concave contour of her belly, into the red curls hiding her femininity. He shifted lower, and his fingers parted her folds as his mouth settled on her aching clit.

She arched with a screech of pleasure, bucking hard against his mouth. He sucked her deep, his tongue probing into her opening and licking it. Her hands clutched uselessly at his hair, either urging him on or trying to make him leave, she wasn’t sure. She wanted more, she wanted to feel all of him but wasn’t quite sure what to ask for.

He seemed to know, however, and moved off her. She reached for him. She may not have known exactly what she was reaching for, but she knew she didn’t want him to go away. He moved, his clothing shifting off, his skin hot against her touch. She touched his chest, his hips.

“Do you have a condom?” she whispered.

He blinked, confused.

“I have one,” she told him. “I thought, you know, just in case.”

She reached for her jeans and took out the little foil from her pocket. She heard the tearing of a wrapper, and then he was lifting her hips, settling them over his shoulders. He rose up between her legs, holding firm to her thighs. In one thrust, he entered her.

She cried out as pleasure exploded.

“God!” he groaned. “You’re so tight!”

He held still as they adjusted to the new feeling and warmth enveloping them both. Though his body didn’t move, she could feel his cock twitch deep inside her. Each flutter of him touched an interesting spot. It made the shock of the penetration disappear while something new took its place.

“You feel so good, clutching my cock so tightly,” he whispered as he lowered his chest toward her. His hands moved up to encase hers, and their fingers twined together. “Like a glove. Yes, squeeze me. I have to…God! I have to…Thea!”

“Yes,” she moaned as she moved her hips.

That was all the encouragement he needed. He surged, burying himself deep, this time nudging that spot inside that liquefied her bones. Again and again he thrust, the pace slow at first then increasing with every breath, every heartbeat.

Over and over, he brought her to the peak, only to slow and leave her panting for more. Her legs slipped from his shoulders as he leaned over her, chest to chest. His hands left her to tangle in her hair.

He created a rhythm that had her crying out with a madness so divine, quivers churned her inside and out. He trembled against her, she felt him start to stiffen, and she opened her half-blurry eyes to watch him…not noticing the knife until the blade tipped to catch a sliver of light.

She had no idea where the blade had come from, but she could do nothing but stare in horror at it. She could not cry out or pull away or even reach up to stop him. The seconds passed by in a blur, yet at the same time they rolled by ever so slowly. She watched as Paden brought the blade down to his leg, slicing deep through the skin and muscle…and immediately felt him shudder to his climax, crying out his own violent passion.

His blood ran freely, and the knife clattered to the ground. With each pump, he jerked with his hips and warm blood spurted to coat their bodies. It was everywhere…the thick stickiness pooling like a crimson river, running into the white sheets.

Thea’s terror melted away the erotic euphoria she had held a moment before. Her eyes were wide with incomprehension as Paden give one more surge with his body, before falling limply on her.

He had passed out, either from the loss of blood or the shock of the wound or from the climax, she didn’t know. She lay on her back, her lungs compressed from his weight, her mind numb. She wiggled from under him and pushed him on his back. The wound on his leg bled profusely.