Love Lifted Me (29 page)

“We miss her so much,” she said, quivering, struggling to hold herself together.

“I can't imagine how hard this must be for you.”

“When Landon called us, we thought for a moment, we'd get our girl back. He'd sue for custody, then give Asa to us. Gus had him all talked into it when he found out Benson had deep pockets. A million dollars . . . he's a fool. What was Rice thinking, going to bed with that man. My stars, you'd think she was raised in the hills by wolves. I taught her, Jade, to be discerning.”

“My own mama died in the spring, Lorelai. I can't know what it feels like to lose a grown child, but I have lost four babies to abortion and miscarriage. I am far too acquainted with grief.” And the child she loved now was not her own.

“A woman lives her whole life dreaming and hoping for her children. Rice was to marry well and have gorgeous, smart children. We'd have family vacations, celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas. We'd be best of friends with the in-laws.” She pulled a tissue from her purse. “When she was engaged to Max all the dreams were coming true. Then she found out he was addicted and bolted to Washington, D.C., so fast, it left us all spinning.”

“Sounds to me like the pills were an excuse, Lorelai.”

“I don't know, maybe you're right. She did tell me I could be a bit smothering. Trying to make her live life for me.” She smoothed her hand over Asa's arm. “I was more prepared to be a widow than childless this stage in my life. Gus and I decided when one of us died the other would move to California to be with Rice. At least part of the year. We were looking into town houses when she died . . . in that stupid, stupid plane.” Lorelai smacked the table with each “stupid.” Asa jolted, eyes wide. “The mechanic told her it might not be safe, but Rice . . . never a fear.”

“It's what made Rice . . . Rice.” Jade smiled tentatively at Lorelai. Did she understand it was uncomfortable to talk so casually about Rice? No, probably not. Rice was her daughter, and right now she saw only through the narrow eyes of grief.

Jade preferred to never speak of Rice again. But since she lived on in Asa, Rice McClure would always be a part of their lives.

“Foolishness is not the same as fearlessness.”

“More, Mama. More.” Asa raised his juice cup, dropping it on the table.

Jade scooted away from the table.

“He's all we have of her, Jade.”

“I know.” Jade filled the cup with juice, cutting it with water. “But you have to stop throwing punches, Lorelai.”

“We'd decided to accept things until Landon came around.” Tear chased tear down her cheek, carving a wide trace in her makeup. “We miss her so much. We used to talk every day. Then I saw her one morning, said good-bye, and she never came home. Gone so suddenly. Then Max banned us from Asa and . . .”

Her words . . . her tears . . . watered the dry soil of Jade's heart. The places where she'd patted over her own sorrows. She brushed the dampness from under her eyes. “I'll talk to Max, Lorelai.”

“Jade, I promise.” She regained her composure. “We'll not do anything like this again. We can't raise a two-year-old. We're seventy. Gus's diabetes is giving him problems and we long ago lost the energy to chase after a toddler. But we'd love to help you and Max.”

“You are his grandparents.” Jade smiled. “And my parents are out of the picture. I don't speak to my dad, and Mama died in March. I think it'd be lovely if you were in his life. In our lives.”

Lorelai squared back, tugging on the hem of her suit jacket, straightening her composure. “I declare I've cried more tears this year than in my whole life.”

“It's been a year for tears.” And joy. “I was arranging with my brother and sister to spend Christmas together. I'd love it if you and Gus joined us.

Wherever we are. Here or in Whisper Hollow. Depending on what Max and the lawyers say—”

“There will be no need for lawyers. I guarantee it. This ends now.” Lorelai pressed her hand to her chest. “We'll be there for Christmas. If it's here or there or in Timbuktu. We'll be there.” Her words faded, choked and thin. “Thank you.”

Jade reached across the table and squeezed her hand. And for a long while, that was all the talking they needed to do.

“Do it, Rick. Just go in there and drop the pills in his desk.”

“Where did you get these?” Rick pinched the bag between his thumb and forefinger.

“Doc Dooley.” Long time Warrior booster, friend of Bobby's.

“Why am I doing this?” Rick's furrowed brow and quizzical gaze grated on Bobby's last nerve.

“Insurance. They'll help us with Benson.”

“Forget it.” Rick tossed the baggie to the desk. “I agreed to help you find a way to the head coaching job, but I'm not planting drugs to frame Max.”

“You owe me.” Bobby prowled toward him. He could almost taste the job, the sidelines, the cheers, the glare of the lights. No way was he spending one more year in this claustrophobic athletic director's office. He'd signed his last girls' softball and volleyball rec form. He was a football man. The only sport that mattered. Football and the Molnar legacy.

“I don't owe you anything worth this. You want to out me for my part in sabotaging the coaches for you, go ahead. But you'll go down with me.”

Bobby glared at Rick.

“You're right.” He tossed the pills into his trash can. “I just get riled up at times. I'm sorry, Rick. I've tested our friendship and overstepped propriety.”

“Wise decision, Bob.” Rick started for the door, then backed up and took the pills from the can. “Let this season play itself out. Wait and see what happens.” Bobby followed his broad back as he went into the bathroom off his office. “Benson has a law career in Tennessee. Fifty bucks he'll go back on his own at the end of the season.”

“I'll take that bet. Steaks at the Stampede.” Bobby winced when the toilet flushed.

Rick came out holding up the empty baggie. “I'm in.”

Rick left and Bobby dropped to his desk chair. Rick was a good friend. An idiot, but a good friend.

Twenty-seven

From the empty bleachers Friday night, Jade watched the Colby Warriors go down to the Palo Duro Dons 52–0. Her heart sobbed as Max tried to hold the team together, but when the Dons went ahead 38–0 at halftime, the Warriors imploded.

Without Noah and Calvin, the offense never found its rhythm. The Dons' offense ran all over Haley's defense. The Warriors moved like slow, sleeping babies compared to Palo Duro's quick backs.

Three times, Max sent Tucker out to kick. He missed—wide left, wide right, and way short. Jade watched Max hang his head each time the refs blew their whistles, swinging their arms, “no good.” Then he'd meet Tucker on the sidelines and pop him on the shoulder pads.
Good try
.

Every time the Dons scored, Max searched the stands for her. She'd smile with thumbs up. But, oh, it was brutal.

She was glad only the faithful few remained when the clock wound down and the torture ended.

“At last, I can breathe.” Brenda patted her chest. “Jade honey, how do you stand it?”

“Part of being coach's wife, I guess.” How
did
she stand it? Jade reached down for Asa and landed him on her hip. Max jogged toward the field house, head down, his feet dragging the ground. What this team needed was a party.

Something fun. “Say, Brenda.” Jade pulled her close. “Have you heard anything? About Bobby?”

“Nothing, shug. No rumors of sabotage or wanting to fire Max. But I've got my ear tuned to Rick Lundy. He and Bobby are T-I-T-E tight, you know, and if anyone's going to cover Bob's shenanigans, it's Ricky. You know, any more games like this where there's no one to buy food and trinkets, the boosters will start crowing. Look, there's Lila Jane. Hey, Lila, is that a new hairdo? Love it.

Love
it.” Brenda waved, smiling, then cut her lips sideways to Jade. “What was she thinking? She's sporting a Brillo pad.”

“Brenda, did you see Lila Jane?” Bit scooted down the metal bleacher. “Hey, Lila Jane.” She waved like Brenda. Then, “She looks like Lil' Orphan Annie.”

“I said Brillo pad.”

“Ooh, I like that better.” Bit patted Brenda on the shoulders.

“You two frighten me.” Jade shifted Asa to her other hip. He was heavy.

“What? We're just citizen observers. Now, Jade, forget ol' Brillo pad hair and Warrior football. What did Dr. Gelman say? And I know you had an appointment 'cause I ran into her at the grocery store the other day.”

“I went. Yes.” A crimson of heat spread across Jade's cheeks. “But it's sort of a personal matter, Brenda.”

“What? Oh Bit, she hasn't told him.”

Bit leaned to peer at Jade. Her blue eyes were accented with major green eye shadow and dollops of mascara on the edges of her lashes. “You're right, B.

She's not told him.”

“Why haven't you, Jade?” Brenda folded her arms.

“Told him what?”

“You're pregnant.” Bold, unabashed. Nosy Brenda.

“Shhh.” Jade looked around. Why? She didn't know. She'd sat alone on her side of the bleachers for the last half of the game. “It's been kind of hectic around our house.” Football. Landon. “I'll tell him when it's right.”

“When will it be right? You know what? You need to go out and do something fun.” Oh, that sounded fabulous.

“The carnival,” Bit said.

“The carnival. Bit, you are brilliant.”

“That's what I keep telling you.”

“Well, keep talking. Jade, do you like carnivals? There's one at the Randall Country Fairgrounds. You and Max should go, kick up your heels, cast off your cares. I'll watch Asa for you and you can
tell him
.”

Tell him
. A recurring theme in her life. “Brenda, thank you, but I can't ask you to do that.”

“You didn't. I volunteered.” Her phone buzzed. “Aw, what in the blazes? It's my husband. He's sitting in the car waiting.” She squinted at her phone's screen. “Says, ‘what's for dinner? Starved.' Mercy, the man has two healthy legs and two healthy arms but when it comes to feeding himself, he's a bawling baby. I knew it when I married him, though. His mama catered to him. Practically fork fed him our wedding cake.” Brenda started down the bleachers. “Bit, I should've never taught him how to text. Jade, how about Sunday night? I'll come over around five.”

“Five? Well, um, sure, okay. Five.”

Bit paused in front of her. “She means well.”

“I know she does.”

“She's the best one to have on your side when the chips are down. I know.” Bit's voice softened. “Have a good night, darling. See you, Asa.”

“Night, Bit.” Jade kissed Asa's forehead and started down the bleachers. The carnival. She hadn't been to one since she was a girl. Mama used to drive a truck for her friend Carlisle's carnival. But Jade had hated the carnival. It usually meant Mama would leave again for months on end and she'd have to help Granny care for Willow.

A carnival
would
be a fun date. Outdoors, under the lights. A great place to deliver the baby news. “Let's go find your daddy, Asa.”

As she approached the field house, Hines passed her. “Jade, come on inside.

Wait in Max's office.”

“Do you think he'll be long? We just want to say hi, cheer him up. I can go on home if he's busy.”

“Well, he's got to talk the boys off the ledge.” He held up his hands for Asa and Jade let him go. “But this little guy will brighten the team right up. Tough night, eh?”

“Brutal night.” Jade adjusted to having empty arms and walked toward Max's office with her hands in her pockets. Hines split off to the locker room with Asa.

In Max's office, Jade flipped on a light and took a seat on his sofa. The leather was thick and deep, but oh so comfortable. What else did he have in this office? Her gaze paused at the window. One, he had an amazing view of the field. Who wouldn't be inspired by this place? Grand field house.

Manicured, custom field with all the bells and whistles.

But Brenda was right. If attendance remained low, the concession staff would make no money. The souvenir sellers would have to fold up shop.

Warrior pride would not live, but die. Max was supposed to be a fresh spark.

Jade got up and moseyed to his desk. Nice chair. She pressed her palms on the arms. And he had the new iMac. Very classy. Absently she opened his desk drawers. So like him. Max the minimalist. Most of them were empty. She spun the chair around to the credenza. Books about football and strategy lined the top shelf. Playbooks and regulations were stacked neatly on the bottom.

Jade drew open a bottom drawer with her toe. Something rattled in the back. She flipped on the credenza lamp. Didn't Max ever dust? She reached inside the drawer. What one thing would he keep down here?