Love Delivered (34 page)

“
Mo
-Morris?” I sputtered. Then my eyes slowly inspected the dark, flesh-colored apparatus, instantly surmising the origin of its name. “I didn’t know you were a fan of
Boyz n the Hood
.”

She cleared her throat. “His résumé has grown since then.”

Things went quiet. I didn’t know how to turn this shit around. I’d been there for almost a week and nothing about it had been sexual. Absolutely nothing. I mean, damn… Zoey was fucking hot, definitely a dime, but I hadn’t allowed my mind to venture there. That wasn’t what this hiatus was all about.

“Jordan does not have free rein of the apartment. He’s not allowed to roam in my room, much less my bathroom if that’s what you’re concerned about.”

Was it? If I would be honest, Jordan never crossed my mind. Her need for a prosthetic did. A damn dildo! I was shocked, angry and…jealous all in the same moment. Then I couldn’t help myself. I didn’t really think about my end game before I spoke the next few words.

“Are you dating?”

With hard eyes, Zoey scraped her bottom lip between her teeth. She didn’t appear nervous or afraid, just jarred like last night when I walked in on her conversation with
Jae
.

“Will my answer be held against me later in a court of law? ‘Cause I mean… those partner support checks come in handy,” she attempted humor, and was full of shit. Zoey didn’t need my money; she hadn’t for at least a year now. Her businesses were turning a profit, this I knew through trusted sources.

I knew I was wrong. In that moment, time had not been flying to the point of leaving me senseless and unable to gather my thoughts. I was
in
the moment and knew my mind was routing manipulative as it had always tended to do to because of my insatiable and obsessive need of Zoey. But I decided on the course very much consciously, didn’t give a fuck. I wanted something from her. I wanted information and
knew
I could obtain it from her. We’d only recently been in touch and managed to bypass the initial formal and awkward period of being in each other’s company with ease because that’s who we were together. Zoey and I were kindred spirits, always expediting the timeline for comfort and intimacy—even if inappropriately.

Tonight would be no different. Hell, I’d take lead. I would push her for what I wanted. Only this time I wouldn’t be alone. Zoey was no angel either. She played coy, but really… What the fuck was she doing coming into the bathroom knowing I’d be undressed? I knew her well enough to know she had a damn agenda herself, similar to the first time she seduced me in Alpine. She may not have been looking for sex this time, per se, but I’m fucking Stenton Rogers: I knew a woman with an agenda when she came sniffing around.

Moment of truth: I truly believed if I wanted to, I could have fucked Zoey that night. I knew what to do and say to decimate her guards. From the moment I walked through that door, needing asylum from the nightmare of Quincy’s death, not once did sex come to mind. And this was a huge feat: I thought about sex with Zoey when we were apart. But now I feel my jealous and protective senses eclipse. It has always been my charge to take care of every one of Zoey’s needs I was capable of. Finances were handled; however, sex hadn’t been tangible because I was never around to gauge that need. She’d shut me out, which was probably for the best or she would have never gotten the space needed to grow. But this shit…it felt different. I felt some kind of way. I felt Neanderthal, and unable to fight my next move.

“What exactly are you asking?”

“I’m asking are you dating anyone.”

“I don’t think that’s what you’re asking while holding Morris up in the air.”

“Okay. Well, why don’t you answer what I’m not asking?”

“No.”

“No? Why?”

“Because it wouldn’t seem fair for you to get significant personal information from me when I can’t reciprocate the inquiry because I already know the answer.”

“You think you know the answer, but you don’t—”

“Oh, brother,” she blurted. “You’re gonna try to tell me you’re not sleeping with Jenna…your
girlfriend
?”

“That’s not what I’m saying at all.”

“I don’t get it.” She hiked a brow while crossing her arms over her abdomen.

I paused, cautioning myself. I knew if given just a half hour I could be buried deep inside of Zoey. I knew our magnetic pull toward each other was that potent. I could tell by the way her pulse was drumming in her neck that she was charged. But this wasn’t about sex. It was about intimacy, no matter how inappropriate it was for us at that point in our relationship. I thought of another way of going about what I wanted from her; Ezra’s admonitions whispering in my conscience be damned.

“Five rounds, Texas Hold ‘Em. The winner of each round gets to ask any question they choose. The loser must answer truthfully without hesitation.”

I challenged her eyes and I could see Zoey’s mind working overtime. She was competitive as fuck. It came with being a top student all her life. This was the manipulation. Here was where it was confirmed that I could have her if I wanted, but I wouldn’t because I respected her too much…and Jenna.

Scraping her bottom lip between her teeth, she nodded enthusiastically. The power of my influence over her tightened my fucking chest. I rounded her to leave for the bathroom.

About thirty minutes later, I sat in Zoey’s office, waiting for her to join me. This was the best room, the least conducive to relaxation—not that I couldn’t take her in here. It just was…best. Zoey came in shortly and we started our card game right away. I let her deal the cards to warm her up. I won the first round, feeling triumphant. My question was already planned.

Zoey rolled her eyes. “I know what your first question is already.”

“No. You don’t,” I fired back. She sucked her teeth. “What was it that you told the dude, Jae, you’ve never done last night?”

Zoey’s mouth dropped. “You were eavesdropping—” 

“Answer the question, Elizabeth!”

She slammed her back into the chair, rolled her eyes again.

“It doesn’t matter because I lied.”
I fucking knew it!
“I…uhhhh.” She licked her lips nervously, unable to look me in the eyes. “I just don’t like discussing my sexual history with men. He didn’t need to know I’ve done it all.” She shrugged.

I’d hoped she didn’t see my shoulders sag in relief.

We played another round…another round I won. Zoey straightened her shoulders, preparing for my next probing question.

“How often do you…” I cleared my throat, “…engage Morris?”

“As often as I need to.”

“That’s really not an answer, Zo. As your former lover, I know that could be… well, a lot.”

“Well…” she inclined, placing her elbows on the table, shifting closer to me across the table. It was a seductive move and intended. “I don’t exactly keep a paper trail of hotel receipts from our encounters, StentRo. Besides, Morris is not Stenton and Stenton is…not Morris.”

Really
…

Fair enough. I began shuffling and dealt the cards, disturbed. Provoked. This time Zoey won. I grabbed my glass of
Maracame Gran Platino
, awaiting her question that could only refer to my sex life with Jenna.

“So, how soon before you and Jenna get married?”

I choked on my drink, needing a few moments to settle my throat.

“Wow. Is that too personal?” she asked wryly.

“No. Not at all. It was just the question…” I cleared my watery eyes. “I’m not going to marry Jenna.”

Zoey cocked her head to the side. “You guys have been dating for almost two years. You aren’t getting any younger. I’m sure that’s what a woman like her aspires to.”

I shifted, uncomfortable in my seat. “Yeah…but there are prerequisites to marriage.”

“Like what?” Her face is wrinkled.

“Like being in love.”

“So, you guys aren’t in love?” Zoey’s eyes are big as hell.

Now
I
can’t give
her
straight eye action. “
I’m
not in love,” I muttered as I reached up to gather and toss her the deck of cards.

From my peripheral I could see she was utterly stumped. Thankfully, she continued without further questions. I won the next round.
Thank fucking goodness
. Honestly, I don’t think she gave much effort that time.

“You’re not on your A-game…didn’t play very hard,” I mentioned.

“No. I’m getting tired. I think I’m done after this round, if you don’t mind.” There was less aggression in her tone.

I didn’t know what that meant, but I was determined to get my next, and apparently, my last question out. I took another swig of my drink, a long one.

“I’m ready for my next question,” I informed with my chin in chest, studying her.

“Go for it,” she murmured, and sat back seemingly disinterested.

“How many lovers outside of…Jacques and Morris?”

It burned my throat to utter that Moreau’s name. I still hated that fucker. I’d probably be buried with venom for him.

“Stenton, this is getting more personal than I originally calculated.”

“You agreed to the game. You lost. I’ve presented my question. I’ve even conceded to you quitting on me early. Answer the damn question, Zo.”

I felt it: the aggressive manipulator in me rising. I wanted answers. Zoey chewed on the corner of the inside of her mouth while she made the clicking sound with the back of her throat. My erection stiffened even more under the desk.

“Zoey, we don’t have a lot of time,” I provoked. 

The fuck am I doing?

Zoey swallowed hard. Her eyes blinked rapidly and repeatedly.

She stretched her neck slightly. “None.” Then her eyes appeared. On my eyes. Before I could let go of my breath, Zoey whispered with heavy eyes, “Goodnight, Stenton.”

I observed the jiggle in her ass as she ambled out of the office, feeling like shit. Did I really have to use scheming methods to have my ego stroked? Was the need so great because I couldn’t have my cock stroked by her?

I knew Zoey’s answer meant that
I’d
given her all those experiences, seeing that the fucker Jacques Moreau couldn’t have in one shot, and Morris couldn’t without a brain. I’d isolated all the possibilities with that maneuver by having her essentially admit to
me
giving her all of those experiences that Jae character mentioned.

~~~~~~~~~~

My chest was heavy and mind wouldn’t slow.
I should call Ezra
. But I couldn’t because calling my therapist would require full disclosure of what got my ass in the predicament anyway. Not only that, but I’d have to verbalize a confession of the comprising position I’d put Zoey in last night, the horny one I’d driven myself into, and worst of all, my fear of her getting release tonight when she left for her date with Jae in Jersey before picking up Jordan.

Man, have I come a long way with this counseling shit. Never did I think I’d be so driven to call someone to help me sort my shit. But I fucked up big time. I was blanketed with guilt for what I’d done. That aside, I’m angry about her being with another man right now. Hell, I’m still aroused about our conversation regarding sex.

Fuck it!

I needed to get this shit off my chest, especially before the funeral tomorrow. I grabbed my phone, tapped away, and held my breath until he answered.

“Yo, Ezra. You gotta minute?”

~~~~~~~~~~

~
Zoey
~

As soon as we walked through the door, I told Jordan to head straight to his room to put his things away. I dropped my purse and keys and started off to the kitchen when I heard a screech so shrilling, I could swear my child’s vocal chords had burst.

“Daddy!”

That shrill stopped me in my tracks. It hit me. His presence is powerful in this house. I wish I could say that fact was exclusive to Jordan, but it wasn’t. Stenton being around for the past few days had charged the atmosphere even for me.

“Mommy, Daddy’s here! Mommy, look!” Jordan screamed.

I didn’t move. I didn’t feel it was appropriate, and Jordan didn’t need me. He was simply expressing his joy and sharing it with me. I continued to the kitchen to get a snack together for us before bed. It was the night before school started and I wanted to ease him into it evenly. It was almost seven in the evening and I knew Jordan would be complaining about being hungry before going to bed. I also didn’t know if Stenton had eaten since I’d left. And me, during that quagmire of a date I had with Jae, the last thing I had an opportunity to do was eat.

There technically wasn’t an opportunity to eat, seeing we met at a coffee shop in Montclair. While there, all Jae had in mind was sex…and Stenton Rogers. He wanted to know when we could meet for the second time…to talk about Stenton’s retirement. I’d only been chatting with Jae on the phone for less than a month. I met him at a barbeque I attended this summer with Angela in West Orange. He was handsome and charming, so I figured
why not
. Big disaster. I wouldn’t be seeing Jae anymore. Jordan’s excitement of coming home to his father eclipsed the huge blow to my ego from my time with Jae. Jae, who by the way, is an editor of a small and unheard of urban magazine. Of course, he hadn’t mentioned that in any of our conversations, not even the few recent ones with the context of sex that Stenton had heard.