Long Time Coming (15 page)

Marnie finally found her voice and quietly informed him, "She died yesterday afternoon."

"Yesterday?"

"Marnie and I discussed it and decided not to ruin your party. I'll leave you two alone.

Come on, Venus. Let's go out back."

The dog followed Law from the hallway leaving Marnie and David by themselves. He was filled with remorse. "Gee, Mom, I'm sorry I wasn't around when it happened."

"You couldn't have known."

"Yeah, but you were by yourself last night"

"I – it was all right. I needed some time to think anyway."

David stepped forward and hugged her. "You must feel awful. I know how I'd feel if anything happened to you."

She wrapped her arms around him and held him close. Tears streamed down her cheeks. "Thank you, darling."

"When's the funeral?" he asked, stepping back.

"Later today I saw no reason to delay it. She had made all the arrangements beforehand. Of course we already had the cemetery plot," she added, thinking of the graves of Sharon and her father.

"Dad and I'll be there. What time?"

She told him. "It'll be a brief service." He nodded, shaking loose several strands of blond hair. Reflexively she reached up to smooth them back. "Did you enjoy the party?"

"It was awesome. We stayed up till four playing poker.

"Poker?"

"Yeah, Dad gave me some pointers before I left and I ended up winning ten bucks."

"I didn't even know about the party."

"I tried to call yesterday and ask permission. Now I know why you weren't home. For a while I was afraid Dad wasn't going to let me go."

"Why not?"

"He wanted to know if Jack's parents would be home and if there would be any booze or drugs or anything like that. I had to convince him that Jack was straight and so was everybody invited. He said he believed me but called Mrs. Moore anyway." He grinned.

"Now I've got
two
strict parents!"

"Is Law strict with you?"

"We've got what he calls rules of the house. No TV until all homework is finished and he's checked over it. Only one soda per day, but I get all the fresh fruit juice I can hold.

Telephone calls are limited to three a night and only fifteen minutes each. If the jambox is loud enough for him to hear, it's too loud.

"He's a lot like you, Mom. He even told me I couldn't lie around on my butt all summer, but had to get a job if I wanted gas money. See? He agrees with you about that. I told him I was planning on working anyway."

"Do you like living with him, David?" She knew it was unfair of her to put him on the spot, but her earnest expression demanded a truthful answer.

"Well, sure," he replied, gesturing awkwardly. "It's a great house. I'd be real lonesome without Venus now, I'm so used to having her around. After dinner every night Dad and I talk about stuff, just like you and I do. Sometimes we crack jokes and laugh, but he gets serious about subjects like God and having integrity things that really matter, you know?"

He covered a huge yawn. "Gosh, I'm sorry, Mom. Last night is catching up with me."

"Why don't you take a nap? I'll see you later this afternoon."

"Are you sure? Don't you want me to come home with you?"

"No, I'll be fine. You rest."

She could tell he was relieved, though he gave her another sincere hug. She was already out the front door when she heard him call out "Hey Dad? Where are you?" much the way he used to greet her.

How could she compete with his natural father, who was an astronaut, who could afford to give him a new car and a new TV, when she had been trying for more than a year to afford new wallpaper for his room?

She couldn't. She wouldn't. Not any longer.

Chapter 17

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^

M
arnie trudged up the stairs of her house. She didn't turn on any lights, although it was already dusk and violet shadows filled every corner.

In her bedroom she stepped out of her black leather pumps and laid her handbag on top of the bureau. Crossing to the window that overlooked the backyard, she gazed at nothing for several minutes. Despair had immobilized her.

Just as she was about to turn away she spotted David's soccer ball lying forgotten beneath the azalea bushes. It looked lonely, discarded and deserted, and seemed to represent all the sadness in her life.

With a heavy sigh she reached behind her for the zipper of her black dress.

"Let me do that for you."

She jumped, then spun around. Law was standing in the open doorway still dressed in his dark suit and white shirt. When her heart had returned to its normal place, she reprimanded him. "You scared me half to death. Where'd you come from?"

"We followed you home."

"We? Where's David?"

"I sent him to my house. He didn't want to go, but I told him that our conversation was for adults only and that he wasn't invited."

"What conversation?"

"The one we're about to have. First I want to know how you're holding up."

"You mean in regard to my mother?" He nodded. "I'm at peace because I know she is.

At last."

"Good. Before we commence, let's get you out of that dress." He moved into the room.

"Turn around."

"I'm not going to take my dress off, Law. If we're going to talk, I'd rather keep it on."

He appeared disinclined to argue. "Suit yourself, but I'm going to get out of a few things." He took off his jacket and tie and tossed both across the end of her bed. He unbuttoned his collar button and rolled up his cuffs. "There. Much better."

"I'm glad you're here, actually," she told him. "I need to talk to you too."

"Shoot."

"You go first."

"Okay," He propped his hands on his hips, took a deep breath, and stared at the floor between his feet for several seconds before lifting his eyes to hers. "David and I have discussed this, Marnie."

"Discussed what?"

"We want to go to court and have his name legally changed to Kincaid."

The words went through her like a spear. She almost cried out in agony. Having David's name changed would make it final. It would cement his identity. He would be Law's son.

Not hers.

"I see," she croaked.

"I want to publicly acknowledge him."

"You don't have to, Law. The public disclosure my mother threatened you with will never happen."

"I know, but public disclosure seems unimportant now. In fact, I want everybody to know who he is and how much he means to me. I called my parents this morning and told them about him."

"What did they say?"

He shook his head with chagrin. "You mean once the shock wore off? They're rushing down next weekend to meet their grandson. He talked to both of them and ran up a hell of a long distance bill. I think it's love."

Marnie, feeling choked up, gave him her back and moved to the window again. "That's wonderful. I'm so glad for David's sake." Her pause lasted for the span of several heartbeats. "In light of that news, it's a good thing I've reached some conclusions of my own."

Her narrow shoulders lifted as she took a deep breath. "I won't fight you in a custody battle, Law. In the first place, I couldn't compete. You're his natural father. Your credibility speaks for itself. I've been an excellent parent, but so far you seem to be doing an excellent job of it yourself, which, I confess, surprises me.

"In the second place, I wouldn't put David in a position of having to choose between us.

He loves me. He loves you. I believe we both love him and want what's best. He's happy living with you. He wants your name. I think it would be best if he went to live with you permanently, I intend to tell him that."

Her throat was achy and tight with emotion. She could barely squeeze the words out.

"In two years he'll be going off to college anyway."

She bowed her head. "I haven't been entirely unselfish, you see. From the day Sharon told me she was pregnant, I wanted the baby because I wanted someone to love, someone who would love me back. A child that I took care of would love me instinctively.

"Sharon monopolized my parents' attention even if it was negative attention. She exhausted them. They had very little energy to devote to me. So I needed David as much as he needed me."

She looked at Law over her shoulder. "But he doesn't need me to take care of him any longer. And I can't burden him with the responsibility of making me happy, fulfilling my needs. I won't."

"I feel constrained to interrupt," Law said. "Aren't you being just a little rough on yourself?"

"I'm not trying to sound like a martyr. Don't think I see myself like that. I spent all day preparing this speech. Every word is heartfelt. Please let me finish. There's something else." He inclined his head, indicating that she should continue. "What happened this morning…"

"Hmm?"

"There are several reasons why it happened."

"Good foreplay for one."

"Law, please."

"Sorry." He gave an impatient wave of his hand.

"I felt so awful after Mother died. Hopeless, you know. Like wondering what good is life if it ends so pitifully sad anyway?"

"I understand. You needed contact with another human being, and affirmation that life might just be worth living."

"Yes," she said, vaguely surprised that he understood so well and was able to articulate what she was feeling. "That's precisely it. And—"

"There's more?"

"The situation caught me at a very emotional time."

"You were seeking an outlet for your emotions. The outlet that presented itself was sex, the ultimate emotional and physical catharsis."

"Exactly," she said softly.

"Is that all?" he asked, moving toward her.

"Yes."

"Liar."

Her head snapped up. "What?"

"You're lying. There's another reason that you had sex with me." He tilted her chin up with his crooked finger. "You love me. Don't you, Marnie?" She swallowed, wet her lips, and blinked. "Don't you?" he repeated.

She closed her eyes and nodded her head.

"I was the dumb son of a bitch who broke your heart."

"You didn't break my heart on purpose," she said, opening her tearful eyes. "You just made it impossible for me to love any other man. Even I couldn't have known that a teenage crush would endure this long."

She felt a seventeen-year-old burden being lifted off her heart. The freedom to speak her love for him out loud was well worth the price of some pride.

"I have always loved you. When you were rolling around on the beach blanket with my sister. When you were being launched into space. When you came storming up my sidewalk, furious over the anonymous letters. I have always loved you, Law Kincaid."

He slid his arms around her and pulled her close. "Marnie, my dear Marnie, it took longer to catch up to me, but I love you like hell." He bent his head and kissed her forehead beneath her bangs. When he pulled back, however, he was frowning.

"That was quite a speech you made, but about three fourths of it was crap. David wouldn't think of leaving you and coming to live with me permanently. He's told me that repeatedly and unconditionally. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if he's packing to come home right now.

"Another thing is that I never thought you were a martyr. You're certainly not selfish.

In fact, you're about the least selfish person I've ever met. You have a huge capacity for loving, which I plan to cash in on." He brushed his lips across hers.

"And if you had let me finish
my
speech before you started
yours
, you would have learned that David isn't the only Hibbs I want to change into a Kincaid."

"What?"

"I figure a name change and a marriage could be handled by one judge. We'd be killing two birds with one stone. It would entail only one trip to the courthouse, and since parking space downtown is at a premium—"

"Law!"

"What?"

"You want to get married? To me?"

"Of course to you. You're going to be the mother of all future little Kincaids." He splayed one hand over her stomach and slid it down to cover her lower body. "In fact, since I broke my own golden rule with you and didn't take any precautions, there might be one already nesting inside you."

He kissed her softly and left his lips against hers when he added, "The last time I failed to use a condom I scored big, so I want to hustle you to the altar as soon as possible. I'd like for my other babies to have the advantages, like legitimacy, that David missed."

He covered her breasts, his thumbs seeking out their centers and making them stiff with seductive strokes. "I want to watch you feed our children."

"Law." She laid her hands against his cheeks and spoke his beloved name in a wondrous whisper.

Angling his head, he kissed her with no restraint. She locked her arms around his neck as her tongue actively mated with his, exhibiting the sensuality she'd been born with but which had been reserved exclusively for him.

"Here are the rules of the house," he said gruffly, ending the kiss while he still had the control to think. "You'll go on being your wonderful self. I'll become a faithful but awfully horny husband."

"Suzette and clones will have to go."

"Agreed. Besides, none can hold a candle to you when you get prone between a set of sheets." His smile gradually relaxed and his eyes peered seriously into hers. "The only thing I can't give up, Marnie, is my work. If I couldn't fly, I wouldn't be Law. If I weren't Law, you wouldn't love me. Okay?"

"Okay."

"It'll get scary," he continued in that same serious tone. "The families go through pure hell during a shuttle mission. I've seen it cause nervous breakdowns. I've seen it tear up marriages."

"Other marriages don't have me," she said with a confident toss of her head. "I'm tough.

And I have infinite patience. Look how long I had to wait for you."

His eyes turned dark with passion. "I know the feeling." He adjusted his body along hers, leaving no doubt in her mind what was coming next, and reached around her for her zipper. "Now can we finally get you out of this dress?"

* * * *