Linda Castle (15 page)

“Linese, one thing I can promise you—I’ll do whatever I have to, to keep you and Grandpa safe. Always. You can count on that.”

Linese was in his arms before he had time to react. He felt her breasts rub against his chest through the layers of their clothing. His aching heart thudded painfully inside his rib cage while he fought a silent battle between desire, passion and his flagging willpower. Without conscious effort his own hands wrapped around her tiny waist, as if they belonged there, as if they had a right to be there.

“Oh, Chase, you are the most wonderful man….”

Chase felt the noose of hypocrisy tighten around his neck. He couldn’t let her go on like this. He unlaced her fingers from behind his neck and held her away from him, even though it cost him dearly to do so.

“Linese, let’s go home.”

Linese looked up at Chase’s stern face. The muscle in his lean jaw was working spasmodically. Anxiety crept over her, but she forced herself to nod in agreement. She held her head high while she walked beside him back to the buggy. She couldn’t become fainthearted now. She had to believe that Melissa was right, and keep doing what the young woman had told her to do. Their future together depended upon it. They were in front of Goten’s Livery when the mayor appeared from a nearby alley.

“Chase, we have to talk—now.”

Linese felt tension telegraph its way through Chase’s fingers and into her back. “Chase?” She detected something sinister in the mayor’s face.

“Get in the buggy, Linese. I’ll be right there.” Chase turned and followed Mayor Kerney to the side of the stable. The mayor hitched up his leg and leaned against the building. His round face was lost in the shadows cast by the overhanging eaves. She could neither hear him nor see the expression on his face.

“What is it now?” Chase growled. It was almost impossible to be civil to the man who held his past over his head.

“I, that is,
we
have been patient, Chase. We kept the old Captain off the gallows two years ago, and for that, we expect something in return. When you decided to run off and
join the fighting, you must’ve thought that would be the end of our bargain. It’s not. When do you intend, to start printing the editorials we want?”

Chase followed the tangled conversation as well as he could. New information settled in his brain. So, he had made a devil’s bargain to keep his grandfather from hanging before he left.

But why? His grandfather didn’t seem capable of doing anything that would earn him a hemp necklace. Chase grappled with his lost memory, praying he could find some spark of recollection about what his grandfather had done.

“Chase? Are you listening? When you provided the alibi for your grandfather, we let it be. The investigation was stopped. We never looked any further when you told us you were with the old man, whether we believed it or not. If I don’t see something in the
Gazette
this week, I’ll see to it that the investigation is reopened. I’d hate to think what the law would say about you lying to protect him.”

Chase swallowed his anger and choked back the urge to smash his fist into the man’s face. “I have to take Linese home. I won’t have her in danger,” he said truthfully.

“Fine, Chase, but you remember what I said.” The mayor leaned away from the stable. “Your grandfather’s alibi is you, and we both know you lied. You couldn’t have been with him at Cordellane like you said. I’d hate to see an old ranger brought to such shame.”

Chase watched the pudgy man turn and walk away. He didn’t have any idea what his grandfather had done—but he was willing to do whatever was necessary to keep him and Linese safe from Mayor Kerney and the pack of coyotes the tubby politician called his friends.

C
hase slammed the library door shut behind him so hard the portraits on the wall shook. He lit a lamp and slumped into a chair. He couldn’t keep this up. He had to remember.

With a sigh of frustration, he began to pick his way back through the old issues of the
Gazette.

“There has to be something here that I will remember,” he whispered under his breath. “There has to be.”

He was desperate to find the truth. Even if his past was tainted with sinister deeds, he had to face them. He had to be a man and help his family. He had to keep them safe. It was all that mattered to him now. Damn his pride and his worry over what kind of man he might have been. He was of little consequence, but Linese and his grandfather were.

Chase got on his knees and arranged the old newspapers in order of date, beginning with the issues just before his wedding announcement, in June of 1862. After a few minutes of quick reading, he leaned closer and squinted at the print. He had finally noticed something.

“What the devil?” He changed them around and rearranged to
Gazettes
in three rows.

The first row of editorials, dating from March 1861, had a strong, opinionated style. It was bold and uncompromising, called for the people to make a stand. Chase assumed those were the ones he wrote before he went to war.

The next row, from May through June of 1862, was different. It was short, clipped, factual and concise. The style was another person’s voice entirely. There was no emotion in the words, just dry facts without flavor or opinion.

The third row, starting in September of 1862 and ending around the time he returned, was the one that captured his interest. Intrigued, he read the editorials several times.

Each editorial was eloquent, impassioned, almost lyrical in its plea for sanity amidst the conflict of Unionist against secessionist. For every account of butchery and violence in the neighboring counties, the
Gazette
editorial provided balance and reason in a world gone mad with politics and war.

Chase leaned closer and focused on the words. Without a doubt, the editorials were the best he had ever read, and they were most certainly not Hezikiah Hershner’s. They couldn’t have been his—so just who had written them? He stared at the pages and pondered the question, focusing all his concentration on the new, unfolding mystery.

Linese eased open the library door and peered in. The thin weight of Melissa’s nightgown did little to block out the chill that crept over her, when she realized what Chase was doing.

His long legs were stretched out on the old rug in front of the cold fireplace. Three neat rows of the
Gazette
back issues were on the floor in front of him. She could see he had them folded open to the editorial page. Her stomach tightened into a ball. He was so deep in concentration he had no idea she was watching him.

She could not go on this way. She had to tell him the truth and remove at least one barrier from their path. If she couldn’t find the courage to tell him the truth, how on earth could she be brave enough to see her reckless plan through to the end? Besides, if she was no longer the same timid girl he married, he deserved to know it. If he could not reconcile her new liberated thoughts and actions, then she should
know it now before she ensnared him with the tricks Melissa had taught her.

Linese gulped down her dread and padded forward on bare feet. Chase continued reading, he never heard her, never looked up. Perhaps, she thought, it would be easier to get the words out if he were not looking at her. She took a deep breath and forced herself to find her voice.

“I wrote them, Chase.”

His head snapped around. He looked up at her and his eyebrows pinched together while the truth registered on every plane of his austere face. Her nerve nearly faltered then, but she summoned the strength to face his disappointment at the kind of woman she had become.

“Hezikiah needed help, Chase. I could not stand by and watch your family business fail like so many others.”

He still had not spoken, so she knelt beside him on the old rug and tried to explain.

“I remember what you said, about women with opinions in their head, but Chase, the war made it so hard to remain that simple, sheltered girl you married.” She peered into his gunmetal gray eyes and prayed he would not hate her. “I didn’t plan it, Chase, but I’m glad it happened.

Linese sighed and felt a great weight ease from her shoulders. She had admitted the truth. She liked working at the
Gazette
even if it was unladylike and not proper. Now she would have to face Chase’s wrath and disillusionment.

“With the war and all, the
Gazette
was nearly going under financially. Hezikiah had not been paid for months. He needed someone to help so he could get circulation up again. We wouldn’t have made it at all, but the Businessman’s Association suddenly came forward and loaned us some money, until we got on our feet. We managed to show a small profit and got them paid back, right before you came home.”

Chase narrowed his eyes at that information. The mayor and his friends had been tightening the grip on Chase’s family even in his absence. If he had not returned when he
did, or if Hezikiah had failed to repay the loan, what would their next move have been? Fury boiled inside him to know his family had been used—even subtly—while he was not here to shield them from the malignancy of Kerney and his greedy philosophy.

“Chase, say something. Are you disappointed in me?”

Chase stared at her for a few long minutes. Watching Linese’s face in the uneven glow of the light had done strange things to his insides. Hearing her parrot the words he had so carelessly flung at her about how a woman should behave and think shamed him. It was more than he could withstand.

He reached out and pulled her closer to him. He turned her away from him, so he didn’t have to fight the lure of her eyes. When her back was pressed hard against his chest, he wrapped his arms around her waist and held her there, tight against him. The soft, warm weight of her breasts on his forearms sent a shiver of desire through him. Chase knew what he was doing was madness, but he did it anyway.

“I could never be disappointed in you. Not in anything you do or say.”

With a sigh of prickly contentment, he rested his chin on the top of her head and held her. The silky hairs tickled his throat. He needed to hold her. He needed to feel her strength of spirit against his body while he gave her a small portion of the comfort and approval she so richly deserved.

“That was why you wore gloves in this ungodly heat, wasn’t it? You were trying to cover the ink stains on your hands.” He kissed the top of her head and hated the man who had left her to go to war. “I left you with a great responsibility when I went away.”

Chase decided he must have run away, been a coward and gone to war, rather than face the threat Kerney and his allies held over him. How could he have been so stupid? Nothing was worth leaving this remarkable woman.

“Taking care of Grandfather, and the
Gazette.
You did a fine job, Linese. I’m proud of you, and I’m sorry I left you with such a burden. Can you ever forgive me?”

Linese blinked rapidly to thwart the tears, but a hot, hard lump lodged in her throat. She didn’t want to cry and was determined not to cry. “Forgive you?” her voice trembled.

He heard the harsh rasp of pent-up feeling in her voice and emotion bubbled through him. “You did what needed doing. If I had been more of a man, stayed here and taken responsibility, then you wouldn’t have been faced with the task.” Chase’s voice was hard with self-recrimination.

Linese pulled out of his arms and swiveled around to look at his face. She saw his eyebrows pinched together, but they no longer seemed to be an expression of disapproval. She saw a crack in his hard shell, and what she saw beneath brought a river of love spilling forth.

“Chase, I understood why you had to go. I’ve never regretted your decision.”

He looked into her clear blue eyes and saw love and forgiveness written there. He didn’t deserve this woman, but he was damned glad he had her. Even the tiny bit of her he could allow himself was more than worth the price not having all of her was exacting upon his soul.

“How can you say you understand what I did?” he asked.

“On our wedding day, when you told me that one more man fighting for the Union could turn the tide, I understood. You have always felt strongly about your convictions. It’s one of the things I love about you.”

She lowered her lashes and her cheeks flushed. The need to taste her lips was so strong he could not ignore it. Chase placed his thumb under her chin and tipped her head up. He leaned forward and. brushed his mouth across her lips.

They were soft and warm.

A harsh groan escaped his chest. He knew he was courting disaster, but the lure of her goodness reeled him in like a hapless trout. Chase crushed her to him and heard the soft sigh of satisfaction from her mouth.

When her arms wrapped around his neck and she pressed her breasts against the bare flesh exposed between the unbuttoned section of his shirt, an inferno ignited inside him.

Dear God in heaven. He loved her. It wasn’t just the poignant, bittersweet need to remember loving her. It was real and immediate.

It had happened. After all the warnings he had given himself, he had allowed it to happen. He had fallen hopelessly in love with Linese.

Chase felt the power of his devotion roll over him in a huge, all-consuming wave. He could no more disregard the longing he felt for her than he could stop the sun from rising. It was a need, a hunger, that made him tremble inside from the force of it.

“Oh, Chase, I was afraid you would be angry with me.”

“I could never be angry with you, sweet.”

Chase cupped her slender throat in his palm and looked at her beautiful face. Her lips were red and dewy from his voracious kiss. He smiled at the sheer wonder of holding her.

“Linese, how did I ever win such a prize as you?” he asked softly.

She smiled and touched the side of his face with her fingertips. “By sheer strength of will. How could I do anything but fall in love, when you all but dared me not to?”

Impulsively he kissed her again. His tongue traced the outline of her teeth and, in a weakening moment, Chase allowed his hands to roam freely over her form, cherishing the way her flesh felt beneath the thin layer of cloth. He committed to memory every soft nuance of her body, telling himself he would have this one precious memory to hold.

He rubbed his thumb over the hard peak of one nipple and cupped his hand beneath the weight of her breast. His flattened palm sculpted over the smooth valley of her waist. His fingers sought the warm skin of her inner thigh.

“Oh, Linese,” he moaned while his desire unraveled the thread of his reason ever further.

His lips moved over her chin and down her throat. She tasted richer than aged brandy, sweeter than sugarcane. He twined his free hand in her hair and savored the feel of it. It was like holding a skein of the finest silk. She closed her eyes and leaned into him.

She was his wife. He loved her. His body ached to know all of her mystery.

“Chase?”

He heard the longing question in her voice. Every nerve in his body cried out to say yes.

But could he? Could he actually allow himself a small ration of ecstasy in her arms and remain strong enough to prevent doing anything that would show himself for the fraud he was?

He would have to try. He could no longer neglect the famine inside him. If he did not taste some of her goodness, he would surely die. Chase eased her back down to the rough texture of the rug. Her eyes were wide and luminous.

“Linese”

Fists banging on the door brought Chase to his feet in an heart-pounding leap. Linese made a startled sound of surprise. He looked down her and saw her gown shoved up to her thighs. Her alabaster flesh looked smooth as satin in the lamplight.

Shame at what he was about to do swept over him. He adjusted his clothes and tried to ease the aching in his groin. Chase grabbed the lamp and strode out of the library doors. He reached the big front door of Cordellane just as his grandfather appeared at his side. Light winked off the barrel of a pistol the old ranger had concealed in the folds of his nightshirt.

“Anyone out at this hour of the night is bound to be trouble,” Captain Cordell commented dryly.

Chase nodded in agreement at his grandfather’s lucid observation and unbolted the door. Sheriff Rancy Thompson was standing outside, blinking against the glare of the lamp Chase held in his face.

“Sheriff?” Chase said. “What brings you to Cordellane in the middle of the night?”

The man shuffled his feet. It was obvious he was not happy to be standing on the veranda of Cordellane, regardless the reason. Chase sensed Linese standing behind him in the shadows by the library door.

“I’m real sorry about this, Major Cordell.” Rancy grimaced. He took a deep breath and then his explanation spilled out in a rush. “Dang it, I’ve come to arrest the Captain.”