Level Five (6 page)

             
She turned to face him and smiled.  “I thought that’s what you said.” 

             
“Sorry about last night,” he said, his breath toothpaste minty.

             
She placed a finger over his lips.  “Let’s forget about it.  We’re going to have a good breakfast and then we’re going to figure out how to spend this beautiful day together.”  She moved out of his embrace and headed for the refrigerator to get the ingredients she needed for the waffles while he headed for the coffee maker.

             
“Actually, I was thinking maybe this afternoon you’d like to go to the bookstore and check out what kind of publicity they have up for your signing next weekend,” he said as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

             
“That would be terrific,” she replied.

             
“And if you feel like it, Teddy invited us to a barbecue at his house at four this afternoon. I told him I’d call him this morning to let him know if we were coming.”

             
“Sounds good,” she agreed.  Although Teddy sometimes made her want to put him in time out, she adored his wife, Lisa and their children. “When you call, ask what we can bring.”

             
“I already asked and they said nothing.”  He sipped his coffee and watched as she plugged in the waffle iron to heat.

             
“Then we’ll stop at the store on the way over and pick up a cake and a gallon of ice cream.  I hate going anywhere empty handed.”

             
He grinned at her knowingly.  “You just want to stay Snap, Crackle and Pop’s favorite person. You know the way to their heart is through cake and ice cream.”

             
She returned his smile.  “Someday those girls are going to hate Teddy for those nicknames.”

             
“I’m not sure Teddy even remembers their real names anymore.”

             
“Sarah, Caitlin and Patience,” Edie rattled off, her voice filled with the affection she held for the girls.  “And they all love chocolate ice cream.  And now, make yourself useful and grab the syrup out of the pantry.”

             
For the next few minutes they worked as a well-honed team to get the waffles on the table.  Rufus gruffed and danced underfoot as if trying to make them believe he was an active participant in the making of the meal and therefore deserved some of the spoils.

             
After breakfast a communal shower led to a watery quickie that had them both giggling like teenagers. Once dressed, they left the house with no particular destination in mind until the afternoon when the plan was to stop by the bookstore and then head over to Teddy and Lisa’s home.

             
“How about a walk at the park,” Jake suggested when they were in his car.  “It’s not as hot today and we should take advantage of it before the dog days of summer arrive.”

             
“That sounds good,” she agreed. “I’ve spent way too much time this week sitting on my butt in front of the computer.”

             
“And it’s a fine looking butt,” he replied with a quick glance at her.  “But, we’re not going to talk about work today.”

             
“Fine with me.”  She’d spent the last week immersed in Colette’s story and she felt the need to get away from it all, to have a day filled with something other than the grim details of a crime that had happened years ago and yet lingered far too strongly in the here and now.

             
The park was the perfect place to spend a late spring morning.  The paths were lined with newly bloomed colorful flowers. They shared the space with families also taking advantage of the unusually beautiful spring day.

             
Jake caught her hand in his as they walked at a leisurely pace.  “This is nice,” he said.

             
She nodded and smiled at him.  “It is.  I’m glad you thought of it.”

“Ever think about calling your mother?” he asked.

              “I call her,” she replied as she fought the impulse to pull her hand from his.

             
“Yeah, once a year on her birthday.  Wouldn’t you like to renew some sort of real relationship with her?”

             
This time she did yank her hand from his, stopped walking and looked at him curiously.  “Why this sudden interest in my relationship with my mother?  Are you consciously trying to ruin a nice walk in the park?”

             
“Not at all,” he protested.  “I guess I mentioned it because I talked to my mother yesterday. It got me thinking about what an empty space you must have inside you without yours.”  He grabbed her hand and squeezed it.  “You have two half-brothers that you’ve never even met.  Aren’t you at least a little bit curious about them?”

             
She continued walking as she thought about the mother who had abandoned her a year after Francine’s death. It used to hurt, to think about her in another state, with a new family to replace the one she’d left behind. 

She told herself it didn’t hurt anymore, that the pressure the subject created in her chest had nothing to do with pain.  She was over it, had been over it a very long time ago.

              “Sometimes I’m curious,” she reluctantly admitted.  “But, the curiosity doesn’t last very long.  She’s happy now.  Why would I want to insinuate myself in her life and ruin things for her?”  Edie shook her head.  “I’ll always be a reminder of the daughter she lost.  I’d rather be nothing in her life than be that.”  She shrugged.  “Face it, Jake, some things just can’t be fixed.”

             
An hour later they walked up the sidewalk toward the Barnes and Noble store in an upscale outdoor shopping mall just north of downtown Kansas City.  Edie’s publicity photo was in the window with a sign announcing the author’s appearance next Saturday.

             
Terri, the manager of the store spied them through the window and motioned them inside.  “Edie, I can’t tell you how excited we are to have you here next weekend.  We’ve already sent out flyers to all our regular customers and expect a nice crowd for you.”

             
“That sounds wonderful,” Edie replied. There was nothing worse than a book signing where nobody came.  “I just wanted to stop by and make sure we were still on.”

             
“Definitely, the books are already here and in the back room just waiting for next Saturday’s release date and the signing.  We’re really looking forward to a terrific day.”

             
“Thanks, Terri, then I’ll see you at two on Saturday.”

             
When they left the store Jake paused in front of her picture.  “That’s one hot woman,” he said as he threw an arm around her shoulder.

             
“Let’s hope she can sell some books,” Edie replied.

             
The subject of her books came up again later in the evening when she and Lisa were sitting on Lisa’s deck.  The three girls were playing in the miniature house in the yard. Jake and Teddy were arguing about barbecue sauce over the grill.

             
“I heard you’re working with Colette Merriweather,” Lisa said.  “How’s that been?”

             
“She’s Colette Burgess now and it’s been difficult…painful and absolutely fascinating.”  Edie paused and took a drink of the strawberry margarita Lisa had made for her minutes earlier. 

             
Lisa leaned forward and tucked a strand of her strawberry blond hair behind her ear.  “What’s she like?”

             
Edie frowned thoughtfully.  “She’s an intriguing blend of vulnerability and strength.”

             
“I heard she was left horribly disfigured.”

             
“He cut her face up and she has some terrible scars, but it’s funny after spending a few minutes with her you don’t notice them anymore.  What you do notice is the brightness of her eyes, the warmth she exudes.  I like her. I’m finding that maintaining my objectivity is tough.”

             
A shrill cry came from the playhouse.  Patience burst out, crying as she ran toward the deck.  “Mommy, Sarah pulled my hair.”

             
“Snap, don’t torment your sister,” Teddy yelled from the grill.

             
Sarah, the eldest of the three girls appeared in the playhouse doorway.  “I didn’t do anything.  She’s just a baby, that’s the whole problem.”

             
“I’m not a baby,” Patience said through her tears.

             
“Come here,” Edie said to the weepy little girl.  “Let Aunt Edie check you out.”

             
Patience came willingly into Edie’s arms and snuggled up on her lap.  “She’s a mean big sister,” Patience exclaimed indignantly.

             
“Show me where she hurt you,” Edie said. Patience touched a strand of her hair.  “You might not know this about me, Patience, but I have magic kisses.”

             
Patience sat up straight and looked at Edie with widened eyes.  “Magic kisses?”

             
Edie nodded.  “If I kiss your head, then it won’t hurt anymore.”  Edie pressed her lips against the strawberry-scented blond curls. For a moment that crazy deep wistfulness that she’d felt on the day she’d learned of Colette’s pregnancy filled her. 

             
Patience looked at her in astonishment.  “It worked!”  She jumped off Edie’s lap and went racing back toward the playhouse.  “Hey, Aunt Edie has magic kisses.”

             
“Ah, the drama,” Lisa exclaimed.  “Now tell me more about Colette.”

             
Edie watched until Patience disappeared back into the little house and then turned back to Lisa. “She’s happily married and just found out she’s expecting her first child.  The book is definitely going to be a testimonial of her strength and courage and her ability to find a happy-ever-after despite what she suffered.”

             
Lisa shook her head and shivered. “I can’t imagine surviving what she did.  Three years of being held captive?  Of being tortured and mentally and sexually abused?  I don’t think I’m that strong. I think I’d just curl up into a fetal ball and will myself to die.”

             
Edie smiled.  “Let’s hope neither one of us ever have to find out what we would do in a situation like that.”  She took another sip of her drink and cast her gaze back to where the little girls had abandoned the playhouse. They were now jumping rope.

             
Their laughter rode the breeze. As Edie thought of that moment of Patience snuggled so trustingly in her lap, that insane wistfulness filled her once again. She consciously shoved it away.

             
“You know, you should have a couple kids of your own,” Lisa said softly as if she’d read Edie’s thoughts. “You’d make a great mother.”

             
“Thanks, but I’m not sure my path in life includes children, unless you count Rufus.” 

At that moment Caitlin screamed that Patience had tripped her and Lisa grinned at Edie ruefully.  “That’s too bad because there are definitely days I would gladly give up one or two of mine.”

Edie smiled and looked at Jake and then back at the girls.  There was a piece deep inside her that longed for children, but there was a bigger, more vocal part of her that reminded her of what she’d said to Jake earlier in the day.  Some things just couldn’t be fixed, and she was certain she was one of those things.

                   Chapter 8

Anthony stood in the bathroom stall, waiting for the two men at the urinal to finish their business and leave.  Anthony never used the urinal, always opting instead for the privacy of a stall.

It was Monday, midday and he’d been fighting a wave of anxiety since he’d opened his eyes that morning and remembered that yesterday he’d buried his latest project.

              He hadn’t intended to kill her.  He hadn’t wanted to kill her yet, but as he’d walked into that room filled with paper from floor to ceiling for a brief moment the hoard had completely overwhelmed him. 

When his gaze had fallen on her she’d looked just like his mother, sitting in the middle of a hoard with a box of newly acquired items from a dumpster.

The rage had descended like a red curtain in front of his eyes, blinding him. When the curtain lifted the girl was dead. 

What upset him the most was the realization that she hadn’t been the one after all. She hadn’t been the one to heal him, to fix him.

              “He’s gotta be gay,” one of the men at the urinal said.  Anthony recognized the speaker as Bob Randolf, who worked in accounting and was something of a homophobe.  “I’ve never heard him talk about any woman he’s ever dated.”