Kozav (9 page)

“You could never be worthless. Never.”

“My family—”

“Died because of crazed males. Not you.
They
tried to destroy your race. Not you.”

He prayed to the skies that he could believe her, but he was unwilling to hope. He’d spent so many years—centuries—with the guilt strangling him that he did not know any other way to live.

“As you say,
shaa kouva
.” He stole another press of his lips on her skin, the feel of her flesh so close, too great a temptation. “As you say.”

Grace tilted her head to the side, seeming to give him more space, and he wanted to take advantage of the move. But there had been assumptions aplenty between them. Choices made with painful consequences.

“Grace?”

“I…” His mate trembled.

“Grace?” Kozav eased her from him, concerned over her shaking. He met her gaze, cataloging her appearance with each passing moment. They were so close, her green-flecked eyes intent on him, her dark curls framing her face and her pink lips begging for his kiss.

“I…” Her fingers danced along her neck, ghosting over the damp spots where he’d placed his lips. He should not have taken such a liberty, but he’d been unable to hold himself back.

“I apologize if I went too far.”

“No.” She shook her head. “That’s not what I was trying to say.” She grimaced. “I liked it.” Was that passion in her gaze? “I liked it a lot.”

Kozav’s
cokh
throbbed, need for his mate growing with every inhale of her alluring scent. “I do not know what that means, Grace.”

“I like the way you look at me, too. Even when you’re yelling at me.” Her small teasing smile had him stiffening further. He would not be able to walk if she did not cease.

“How do I look at you,
shaa kouva
?”

“As if you’d die without me.”

He tilted his head to the side. “Do you not understand, my mate? I
would
die without you. Our beginning was not smooth, but even when you scared me until I thought I’d drop from the skies like a stone, I still could not imagine life without you.”

“I’m difficult.”

“You are a
challenge
.”

“I’m stubborn.”

“The word is
opinionated
.”

“I’m independent.”

“You are afraid to trust,
shaa kouva
, there is a difference.”

Grace broke away from his stare and he immediately felt the loss of her attention. “You’ve been talking to Mom.”

“I assured myself of her well-being before I returned to our quarters. The Preors have taken much from her and I wish for her to have everything she could ever desire.”

She slowly turned her head toward him again. “Why?”

“Because you are my mate, she is your
dam
and someday—skies willing—she will be the
grandam
of our dragonlets.” He hated himself for revealing so much and cursed himself for his loose tongue.

His mate sucked in a quick breath, her wide eyes centered on him. “You want that?”

More than his wings, he wanted that. “It will come—or not—in time,
shaa kouva
. For now, let me continue feeding you and then it shall be time to retire.” Her expression turned skeptical, a female wary of a male. “We are mates and it is best if we share space. There is no other bed and the one I have is very large. You have nothing to fear from me. I will not touch you unless you desire it, Grace.”

Kozav prayed she would desire his hands on her, but in his heart, he knew he would be sleeping with
bluh ballz
. His only solace was that they may not be
bluh
forever. Dam Hall stated that Grace was slow to trust, but once she gifted a male with her heart, he would be one of the luckiest males alive. When he received a small smile from his mate, or a cute grin, he knew the female spoke the truth. He would be the luckiest male if Grace put her faith in him.

In the meantime, he hoped
bluh ballz
was not a deadly condition.

G
race was a big kid
. There was no reason to be nervous about sharing a bed with a man—no, male—she hardly knew. They were mates, right? It should be fine; normal, even. Yeah, someone needed to tell that to the butterflies in her stomach. Actually, they were more like a dozen
ouxch
. The Knowing supplied the word, but her human mind translated it to something like a prehistoric pterodactyl. Great, massive winged things were making a mess of her belly.

She licked her lips, mouth dry, and stared at the massive bed that dominated Kozav’s sleeping chamber. Their sleeping chamber, she supposed. He moved around the room, pulling out tomorrow’s uniform, setting his blades in their place beside the bed.

“Within easy reach should we be attacked. I will protect you, shaa kouva. I will not fail you again.”

She’d wanted to correct him. Her altercation with Impe wasn’t his fault. It was her own, but she knew it would be a pointless exercise.

Kozav strode to the other side of the room and tapped on the wall. A drawer slid out, revealing its contents. Two rows of fabric lined the rectangle, varying colors ranging from white to black and every shade of grey in between. He propped his hands on his hips, staring down at the clothing for a moment. He turned his attention to her, eyeing her with narrowed eyes from head to toe and back again, before returning his attention to the drawer.

“I believe I have made an error,
shaa kouva
.” He finally focused on her fully. “I ordered the ship to construct day clothing, but nothing for rest. I’d believed we would share—”

She could just imagine what he believed. She could just imagine what her mother would encourage her to do now, too.

Embrace life Gracie. There’s no doubting he’s yours, is there?

Yeah, well, she’d embraced enough life for the day
thankyouverymuch.

He cleared his throat. “My off-duty clothing will be large on you and the Preors only wear pants. Wearing something like a human shirt could interfere with our wings.”

So, she’d be topless. Great. She was really regretting the whole “leave the clothes for now because the ship can take care of things” decision. And she’d had the crazy idea to wear Preor clothing.

“I…” The big bad warrior was hesitant. “I live my life with honor, now,
shaa kouva
.”

She shook her head, not understanding him and hating the uncertainty in his tone. “What does that have to do with shirts?”

“I vow I will not
peek
or touch you as we rest. Or we may wait to retire another two hours for the ship to create
pee-jays
.”

Grace almost groaned. Almost. She was torn between, “Please peek and touch me,” “I will cut you if you look my boobs,” and, “Maybe it’d be best if we waited for the ship to handle things.” Mainly because knowing she was his mate and
knowing
she was his mate were two very different things. She wanted him, but… Nope, she wanted him. She just had societal norms and expectations bouncing around her head. Good girls didn’t go to be with guys after spending a few hours with them. Even if she’d already had her hands
inside
him in a not-sexy way. There were names for girls who jumped right into bed with boys.

Except, he wasn’t a boy, was he? No, he was a
male
—a Preor male—who was also her mate.

And hadn’t they already talked about the trust thing? How she needed to trust him?

Not to mention the exhaustion that weighed on him, evident in the way his shoulders sagged and wings curled around him rather than held tensely at his back. He was tired. Tired from his work as Primary Warrior and beaten down by retelling that story. She wasn’t going to be so selfish as to make him stay awake another couple hours just because she was wary.

This would be the first step toward trustdom. She would take comfort in partial covering and put faith in his honor.

“It’s fine.” She forced a relaxed tone she definitely didn’t feel. “I know,” —Hope.— “I can trust you.”

The relieved expression and small smile she received in return were enough to tell her she’d made the right decision. Kozav
was
honorable no matter his past or his beliefs about the start of the war.

Her mate gave her a brisk nod and snared a pair of pants, holding them out to her. “I will leave. You may change and get into bed. I will return in a few minutes.”

She went to him, fingers brushing his as she took the bundle of cloth.

When she would have retreated, he claimed her hand in his. “Thank you for this trust,
shaa kouva
. You will not regret it.”

The combination of his touch and his scent surrounding her nudged Grace into doing something she hadn’t planned. She closed the distance between them and pushed to her tiptoes so she could brush a soft kiss across his lips. It was gentle and quick, no more than a fleeting brush, but it was enough to stoke her arousal. It was enough to have her nipples hardening to firm points.

It was that quick rush of passion from such an innocent touch that scared her. She’d never responded to a man in such a way—ever—and the power of her need surprised the hell out of her. It almost felt forced, as if she had no control over her own body and actions, but the Knowing told her that the feelings were her own. There was no force or interference. Just pure desire on a biological level.

The Knowing told them they were mates. The rest was up to the couple. The couple who was genetically compatible and their attraction existed all the way to a cellular level.

Grace mentally shook her head. She’d analyzed the situation to death and still did not have a firm answer about anything. For now, they’d go to bed and deal with the rest in the coming days.

She pulled her attention from Kozav, hiding from him, her face flushing hot. “Thank you. I’ll…” She pulled the bundle from him. “I’ll just get changed.”

Kozav breathed deeply, once, twice, and then a third time. “Yes,
shaa kouva
.”

She risked a glance at him, surprised by the intensity of his expression. His eyes darkened to near black, his pupils dilated widely, and she couldn’t miss the need that coated his face. She allowed her gaze to travel down his body, over his muscular chest, flat stomach, and finally to the juncture of his thighs. It seemed the barely-there kiss aroused them both to a fever-pitch, desire riding their bodies.

Coward that she was, instead of taking what his body offered—what she wanted most—she stepped back and turned away from him. She strode to her side of the bed and waited for him to leave her alone. His steps were silent as he departed, the only sound of his leaving coming from the room’s doors opening and then closing behind him.

Her body protested the distance, heating further, and her pussy clenched with unfulfilled craving. She knew without touching herself that she was wet—wet and ready for him. It’d be so easy to call him back, to ask him to take her. But no matter how much she
wanted
him, it wasn’t the time to
have
him.

Maybe tomorrow. Or the next day. Or the one after that. Or… when she could finally trust him all the way to her heart.

For now, she slipped off her
xina
and tugged on Kozav’s pants. His scent washed over her and when she crawled into bed, it wrapped around her in its comforting embrace. With that came another wave of arousal, her body trying to convince her that making love to Kozav should happen
now
.

T
he skies hated him
. They wished him to die in bed instead of battle, fighting for his mate and Preor. The pain pulsed through him, pounding an uneven rhythm throughout his body. It hurt to
breathe
, the agony seeming to have no beginning or end. Every thump of his heart sent another round of torment along his spine and his nerves sizzled with the burning ache.

In the past, he’d been clawed, blown up, and skewered with a sword, and none of those experiences matched the torment of this moment.

He glanced at the time keeper on the wall, a soft glowing set of numbers that he hated at that moment. He still had hours until it was time to wake, until he’d be able to escape this misery.

The source of his torture sighed, then wiggled, and finally released a low moan when settled in the new position. With each bodily shift, Kozav was battered further, more and more exposed to his gaze.

His torturer? Grace. Grace’s curls spread across his bed, the
aczi
sinking lower and lower along her lush form every time she moved, and the scent of her skin sinking into him. There was another musky sweetness, one he hadn’t noticed before, and he found he enjoyed that aroma as well. It called to something deep and primal within him, urging him to take her, claim her.

But he restrained the impulse. He had vowed he would not lay his hands on her, and he would not.

She huffed and rolled toward him, resting on her stomach, her arm lightly brushing the edge of his wing.
She
touched
him
. He decided he had not yet violated his vow, thus, he did not have to move
or
apologize for his actions.

Kozav’s
cokh
was angry and hard between his legs, the source of his agony seeming to grow further and hurt even more. But it was a joyful ache. If he had not found Grace, he wouldn’t experience such discomfort, and he would much rather suffer in pain than be without her. Like any honorable male, he would wait until his female welcomed his touch.

Grace turned her head and nuzzled his wing, pert nose rubbing against the sensitive edge and a bolt of pure pleasure had him sucking in a rough breath. If she continued to stroke and touch his wing, he would spill himself in his pants, overwhelmed by the pleasure of her caress. She sighed, a warm puff of moist air bathing him, and his balls tightened, hugging his body in preparation of release.

And still he did not reach for her, touch her. He deserved a statue to honor his restraint.

She mumbled in her sleep, lips plump, and he wished he had taken the time to truly enjoy their kiss at leisure. But she was not ready. A fact he must remind himself of often.

“M’cold,” she murmured and inched closer. Kozav decided he deserved a place with the goddess of the skies when he took his final flight.

Grace didn’t stop wiggling until her side was plastered against his. He slept with his wings mostly tucked beneath himself, the leading edge of his wing curled along his shoulders and partially down his side. It was a position he did not yet feel comfortable with, but Taulan and Jarek assured him that it would enable Grace to “snuggle” with him.

He’d scoffed but humored their ideas when he came to rest beside his mate. Now he was glad he’d listened to the two males. Because it seemed his mate liked to “snuggle.”

Her lush breasts pressed against his wing and arm, the bare skin scorching him and he ached to caress her with his hands… and mouth. She rested her lower stomach against his hip and then placed her left leg across his thighs, knee coming perilously close to his hardness. He was not sure what scared him more—pain should she strike him or embarrassing himself by finding pleasure if she touched him.

His heart rate increased, pounding out an increasing rhythm until he thought it would burst from his chest. She slid her hand over his stomach, delicate fingers skimming his flesh, and he shuddered with the touch. She didn’t stop moving until her hand curled around his opposite hip, until she embraced him fully as if claiming him for her own.

That was how he should see the hold. Her mind wished to claim him. Except, it made him realize that it was her heart that had her hesitating.

Her heart and trust if Grace’s
dam
was to be believed.

He would earn both and he believed one night of torment more than earned him a place in her heart.

It wasn’t until her hand began drifting farther south that he realized he needed to be the trustworthy male he’d vowed to be. By stopping her.

“Grace,” he murmured, needing her to cease before he was unable to do so himself. Her hand continued on its journey south, fingers teasing his hip and sliding easily beneath the loose waist of his pants. The heel of her hand coming to rest just above his firm length. When she moved as if to continue the intimate caress, he grasped her wrist, encircling it with a firm grip. “
Grace
.”

His mate jolted, jerking and then freezing in place. Slowly, she lifted her head from his chest and raised her attention to him. Darkness enveloped them, but his Preor nature allowed him to see her clearly. A Preor had to always be able to track his prey, even in the black of night. Research told him humans were not as gifted. So, while he could see her lovely blush, she could only see his outline and shadowed features.

“You,” he rasped. Her hand so close to where he needed her touch was driving him mad and he swallowed hard as he fought for calm. “You… I did not… You would regret…”

She buried her face against his arm with a groan. “I’m sorry.”

She did not attempt to pull away from him, and he gave himself permission to truly accept and enjoy her nearness.

Kozav huffed out a laugh. “
Shaa kouva
, you should never apologize for touching me. I would die to feel you, but I made a vow and it would be dishonorable to allow you to continue while you are unaware of your actions.”

“I don’t have an excuse for myself. I made a big deal about you… And now I’m climbing you like a tree.”

He did not understand the reference but believed he got the
geest
. He rubbed her encircled wrist with his thumb, tracing her pulse point with a gentle stroke. “You should never apologize for touching me, Grace. We are mates.” He risked much and turned his head, stretching until he was able to brush his lips across hers. The move was uncomfortable and straining, but it allowed him to have a taste of her. “I will always welcome you into my arms.” Grace whimpered and he froze, unsure if the sound came from pleasure or pain. “
Shaa kouva
? Are you unwell? Should I contact—”

She shook her head. “I’m fine. I just… My body just…” She trembled. “There’s so much
need
inside me. Like a craving.”

“I feel it as well. We were made for one another and the skies saw to it that we were brought together.”

“We don’t know each other. How can I feel so…”

“I feel the same, Grace.”

“The Knowing…” His mate was unsure, wary of him and the Knowing, and he could not blame her suspicion.

“It is a symbol of mating, but it cannot control our bodies or emotions.” He stole another kiss. She did not complain about the first, so he pushed his luck for a second. “The desire we share is our own. I have heard of couples who remain in platonic matings.”

Very, very rarely. He would not explain that the reason behind the lack of shared passion wasn’t for lack of desire, but due to injury that left one of them incapable.

“So, if I want to touch you,” with one finger she traced a small circle above his shaft. “Or if I want you to touch me,” the stroke would kill him. “It won’t be because of the Knowing.”

“No,” he rasped, on the edge of explosion.

“Then,” she lowered her mouth to his chest and gave him a gentle kiss. “Then release me,
shaa kouvi
, so I can touch you.”

Kozav groaned and jerked, his need to come nearly overriding every ounce of control he possessed. “Grace, you don’t have to—”

“I don’t
have
to do anything. I know. But I’d like to touch you, give you pleasure.”

“Will it give you pleasure to do so? I will not be a selfish mate.” Ever. His mate would be well satisfied as often as she desired.

Grace nibbled her lower lip, gaze leaving his and traveling along his body. He felt her perusal as if it were a physical touch, her hand dancing along his flesh. Her attention eventually fell to the rise beneath the
aczi
, his need blatant and large. He waited while she made her choice, waited and prayed to the skies that she would like to explore him.

When she nodded and strained against his grasp, he released her. “Do what you will,
rasi
.”

“
Rasi
?” she murmured, her fingers still teasing him.

She wished him to speak
now
? When her hand was so close to his
dikh
?

“Kozav?”

The tips of her fingers brushed the base of his length, stroking his sensitive flesh. He grumbled and groaned, the sensations of her caress driving speech from him.

“Hmm?”

He would never tell another soul, but Kozav joi Grace Hall—formerly sen Aghin— whimpered. But he did manage to gather enough strength to speak. “Cat…” he gasped when she encircled his shaft, smooth palm cradling him. “Preor cat. Devoted.” She twisted her grip, stroking the root of his cock. “Protective.” Then she slipped her fist along his dick from base to tip and he arched his back with a rough shout. He lifted his hips, attempting to follow the delicious sensations. “Loving.”

Those words described his Grace. A woman who would do anything to protect the ones she loved. Who would suffer and fight for those in her heart. He hoped to one day be a person she cared for in such a way.

She rubbed her thumb over the head of his hardness, spreading the liquid across the entire tip.

“My
rasi
,” he hissed. His for as long as she allowed it. He hoped forever.

Grace merely hummed and pressed as close to him as possible, eliminating any remaining distance between their bodies. Her sensual curves caressed him, and he vowed to remember this night for the rest of his days. The first time his mate opened to him, accepted him in some way.

She pumped his length again and again, drawing his release forward. With every breath, he fought for control. With every touch, she fought to make him crazed. He was caught between the two, balanced on the edge of orgasm, and he reveled in the painful pleasure of it.

Cool air suddenly bathed his body and he watched as Grace tossed aside the
aczi,
exposing them both to the ship’s cool air. His mate’s eyes were focused on his arousal while his…

Kozav memorized the soft curve of her breast, the hardened nub of her nipple and the dip of her waist to the flare of her hips. He stared at her, enjoying her attentions while basking in her beauty. She was perfect, his mate. His
rasi
was as beautiful as she was fierce.

And very, very dangerous.

Her pace increased, palm tormenting him with her rapid movements. She stroked him up and down, squeezing him just beneath the head of his dick before retracing her path to massage the base. He rocked his hips in time with her touch, taking every hint of pleasure she gave. Never before had he felt such bliss, such unimaginable ecstasy with the mere feel of another’s hand on him. He gave himself up to Grace, laid himself bare for her.

A sharp sting on his chest drew his attention and the sight before him sent a raging bolt of bliss down his spine. His
rasi
clutched his flesh between her teeth, biting him without breaking the skin. She moaned with the action, almost a growl, and that had him racing even closer to release. Grace acted like a feral Preor female, claiming her mate and holding him steady while she took what she desired.

Kozav froze in place, letting her give and take as she wanted.

His mate bit harder, and his lungs froze, body drawing tight with the increased pain. It was wonderful and horrible at the same time. His shaft twitched in her grip, body reacting to the added pain. Grace’s grip tightened, pace increasing and he allowed himself to become lost to her desires. He reveled in his mate’s touch, in the trust she showed him with this single act. He was driven to the point of madness, but he would never take more than he was given. Her taunting was proof of her trust in him.

She opened her mouth and released his flesh and his balls drew up tightly with the change in sensations.

“
Rasi
, I shall…” He shall spill himself on her hand and the bedding. He should care, right?

Grace did not hear or did not care. Perhaps she wished him to come all over her hand. She moved faster with more force, teeth nibbling and biting what she could reach while she tortured him. Up and down she stroked, faster, harder, and with a squeeze just beneath the head.

He trembled with suppressed need, with pure desire and unadulterated craving.

“
Rasi
,” he rasped the nickname, nearly driven beyond speech.

He didn’t need to speak, he merely needed to listen.

“Come,” she whispered the word against his damp flesh. “Come,
shaa kouvi
.”

Kozav complied, his back arching, wings trembling, and body shuddering as his essence erupted from the head of his cock. The white liquid spurt from his dick and coated Grace’s small hand, painting her with proof of his desire. He roared with the bone-melting orgasm, taken by the burning sensations that zipped along his spine and singed his nerves.

Her ministrations slowed, gradually lessening as he softened in her hand, and eventually he relaxed as well, his breathing coming in harsh pants. He could never have imagined the touch of his mate could feel so glorious.

He also never imagined he would be one to accept orders from his mate. Perhaps that was a secret best kept between them.