Knight in Shining Suit (4 page)

For the first time, I saw
Adam in a different light. The cold, ruthless façade… the brutal
truth he always speaks regardless of who will get hurt… Now, I
understood. He experienced pain. He had been lied to in the past.
He had been betrayed before… that created the man that he is now. A
man who believed that brutal truth, no matter how much it hurts is
still a lot better than the sweetest of all lies. And thus, he
always says what is on his mind. He speaks the truth, as he sees
it. He doesn’t lead people on.

“
What?” he asked, when he
realized I was staring at him intensely.

I snorted and took a gulp
of my beer. “Well, I guess this is probably the first time I’ve
seen evidence that you have a heart.”

He chuckled. “Hard as it
may be to believe… yes. I do have a heart. Oh! I meant… I
did
have a
heart.”

“
So what happened to you?”
I asked him.

He snorted. “I’ve blocked
out some memories. So I can’t really tell you.”

“
But you just said you’ve
had your fair share of love and heartache. Surely you must remember
some things.”

“
If you lose, don’t lose
the lesson,” he murmured. “I may have chosen to forget the
incidences in my life that tore me apart, but I didn’t forget the
lessons they taught me. So, though I may not tell you what happened
to me exactly, I can still give you advice.”

“
Okay, knock yourself
out,
big brother
,” I said sarcastically.

“
Hey, I have known you
since you were kid. We grew up together. We may not be related by
blood, but guess what? I was probably the only brother you’ve
known.”

“
Yeah. And Geena was the
only sister I’ve known. And look what she did to me,” I said
glumly.

“
At least we’ve never been
best friends when we were growing up. You used to hate
me.”

“
What makes you think I
don’t still hate you?” I raised a brow at him.

“
Fair enough,” he said
coolly. “But at least you don’t expect me to be nice. If I say
something that hurts your feelings, remember that I’ve always been
like that.”

“
You’re the first one to
teach me how to be immune. To tune it all out.”

“
Yes. But you’re not a
very good student, are you?” he asked.

“
Why do you say
that?”

“
Because that’s what you
should be doing now. Tuning out. I don’t think you know how
to.”

I sighed. “There are times
that I thought I could. But then again… sometimes it gets so hard.
It was painful.” Tears rolled down my cheeks. “It still is
painful.”

“
I know,” he said. “Don’t
think that it will go away soon. It’s physically hurtful. Like your
chest aches. You know, that’s why they call it heartbreak. Because
you really feel like your heart is breaking. It’s not just an
emotional pain; it’s a physical pain too. And you have to face it,
Ash. There’s no running away from it.”

“
I know. But it’s
difficult not to remember how things were. You know I didn’t only
lose a boyfriend… or a fiancé for that matter. I also lost a best
friend. Geena’s been there through most of my childhood. She was a
sister. And I can’t stop hurting over the fact that the two people
I loved and trusted the most did this to me.”

“
Geena has always been
liberated. You know that. You were the only person in the world who
trusted her too much. She was spoiled. But you worshipped the
ground that she walked on. She made out with one of the guys you
dated in high school one hour after you broke up with him. But
still… you never expected anything less of her.”

“
That’s why I still
couldn’t believe she’d do worse than make out with my ex-boyfriend!
God! Now, I hate her!”

Adam snorted. “Really? And
what about Bryan? Don’t you hate him?”

“
I should. But…” I sighed.
“We’ve been through a lot. And… well, maybe I also drove him to do
what he did…”

Adam was silent for a
while. Then he asked, “What… what could you have done that would
drive him to cheat on you over and over again… for six months…
maybe more? And with your cousin?”

I sighed. I stared at Adam
for a long while. And then I replied, “What he got from Geena… he
never got from me, you know.”

Silence.

A long, deafening
silence.

I stared at Adam. He was
looking at the sea view. His thoughts were not visible on his
face.

“
Adam…” I called. He
finally looked at me. “I can’t believe I am going to ask you this…
but please…
say
something
! For once, I’ll be glad to get a
reaction from you.”

He recovered from the
shock and then he chuckled. “Alright. Even if you’re not going to
like what I am about to say or how I’m about to react?”

“
Yes,” I replied
quietly.

“
So you are saying that
you guys never… had sex or attempted to have sex?”

I nodded. “I have a
no-sex-before-marriage thing. Bryan knew that. We’ve been best
friends even before we got together, you know.”

“
And he never even
attempted to ask?”

I shrugged. “He did. Just
once. But I was firm then. Now, I’m not sure anymore.”

“
How long since he last
asked before he proposed to you?”

I sighed. “Maybe… maybe
about a month after.”

Adam took a gulp of his
beer and then he sighed.

“
What, Adam?” I asked.
“Please…” I pleaded. “You said you’d say what you think no matter
what. And I promise I won’t get mad.”

Adam took a deep breath
and then finally, he said, “Alright. I just think that even if you
and Bryan had gotten married… it wouldn’t have lasted forever. You
wouldn’t grow old with this guy.”

“
Yeah. I don’t think Geena
could keep her mouth shut for too long.”

“
No, no.” Adam shook his
head. “That’s not what I meant. I think Bryan proposed to you
because he wanted to have sex with you. He thought marrying you was
the only way he could have you. He probably even thought you two
would last for a long time. But that could be just lust talking in
his head. Who knows how he would feel about you
afterwards?”

I stared at Adam for a
long moment. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“
It’s not easy to hear,
Ash. I know you loved him. Maybe he loved you too. But then again,
he’s probably more eager to sleep with you than to think past the
commitments of marriage. If that was the case, then it wasn’t going
to last anyway.”

I didn’t say anything. I
took a gulp of my beer and stared ahead into the dark horizon. I
heard the calming sound of the ocean. Inside, I was a mess because
I realized, no matter how hard it was for me to accept it, Adam
might be right. Maybe Bryan thought marrying me was the answer to
everything. We’d been best friends for years. And we did love each
other. If marrying me was the only way he could get to me, then why
not? It’s not like it was hopeless to work out, right? There was a
chance that it could have.

“
Now… since I seem to
always be the bearer of bad news, I won’t make this any easier for
you. You have to know, Ash. The sooner the better.”

I looked at him like he
just grew an extra head. I didn’t get what he was trying to
say.

He was staring at me
wearily. I could tell that he was measuring me, weighing what my
reaction was going to be to something that he said… or worse…
something that he was just about to say.

I raised a brow at him in
challenge. This gave him encouragement to continue. He sighed and
took an envelope from the table beside him. He handed it to
me.

“
Breathe, Astrid,” he
whispered.

I stared at the elegant
magenta envelope in my hand. The edges were trimmed neatly and at
the center were engraved characters B & G.

I recognized the envelope
pretty well. I had seen it before when I approved the sample of
what would have been the invitation for my wedding to Bryan. Exact
same color. Exact same style.

My hands were shaking when
I opened the envelope and pulled out the card inside. My breath
caught in my throat as I recognized the paper material used, the
fonts on the front and the elegant style of the card. I admired the
card company for getting the last minute modifications I asked
them. There were flowers and hearts embossed around the card. At
the center, the letters B and G were engraved in the font of my
choice, Vivaldi.

Bryan and Geena

Bound by love
forever…

Even the words were chosen
by me… but my name had been replaced.

The date was… the same
date as my own wedding would have been had I not caught Bryan
cheating on me. The ceremony would be in the same church where my
parents got married. The reception will be at
King’s Lagoon Resort,
where my
reception would have been
.

Tears rolled down my
cheeks as I crumpled the invitation in my hand.

“
Easy, Ash,” Adam said,
reaching out for my hand and taking the invitation away from
me.

I stared at him
helplessly.

“
Everything’s the same…” I
croaked.

Adam shook his head,
trying to smile at me ruefully. “Not really. As you can see, I am
no longer part of the entourage. And… well, you are no longer… the
bride.”

“
They stole my wedding,
Adam! Bryan was supposed to cancel the arrangements!”

“
Well, apparently marriage
is Bryan’s solution to everything,” Adam said, rolling his
eyes.

“
How could he?” I sobbed.
“How could they do this to me? Don’t they have… decency? Or
conscience? How could they?”

I was getting out of
control. I was shaking and raging with anger. I knew I might begin
hyperventilating any minute if I didn’t calm down. I was losing
it.

I grabbed Adam on both his
forearms and tried to shake him.

“
They cannot do this to
me!” I cried. “You have to stop them, Adam! They cannot do
this!”

Adam took both my arms and
tried to pull me to him into a tight hug.

“
Sshhh…” he said.
“Breathe, Ash. You need to take deep breaths!”

I shook my head and
struggled to be free of him.

“
I need to talk to him. I
need to talk to her! To both of them! They should still feel some
sort of affection for me!”

Adam shook me gently.
“Astrid!” He raised his voice. “Get a grip on yourself! They’re not
going to change their minds about it! Do you think they didn’t know
all these things would hurt you? More than you’ve already been?” He
shook his head. “They do! And still they chose to do it! They still
chose to hurt you! They’re not going to suddenly grow a conscience
for you just because you found out about it! You were meant to find
out about it, Ash! That invitation was yours! Not mine!”

I stared back at him for a
while, unable to believe what he was trying to tell me.

“
Pull yourself together,
Astrid! You’re a strong, independent woman! It’s killing me to see
you torn up like this,” Adam pleaded.

“
How…” My lips were
shaking. Tears continued to stream down my face. “How… how…” I kept
on sobbing, unable to let a comprehensible sentence out.

Adam shook his head. “How
could Bryan do this to you?” He shrugged. “Only goes to show the
type of man you were about to marry. How can Geena do this to you?”
He raised a brow. “Oh, you might be surprised just how much Geena
envied you since we were kids, Ash.”

I stared back at him.
“What?”

“
Geena is a spoiled brat.
She was not content with what she had. Always wanted what the girl
at the next table ordered. And that girl is you. She didn’t like it
that you were happy with your career while she didn’t have a job.
You were great at what you did and you were doing something you
loved. Dad would always tell her to be more like you. Focused.
Goal-oriented. When she was jumping from one boyfriend to another,
Dad would always say how much he admired you for sticking it out
with one guy. She was dating dropouts and spoiled rich kids… you
were having a relationship with an orthodontist. She hated that.
She never showed you… or you were just too naïve to
notice.”

I closed my eyes. I didn’t
know. I thought Geena was my best friend. I always went to her
whenever I had problems. She’s seen me at my weakest. I didn’t know
that she had harbored so much hatred for me. I always thought she
was the lucky one.

I, on the other hand, was
just a typical girl next door. My eye color is weird and I wear
dark blue contacts all the time to make it appear blue rather than
violet.

I was unpopular in high
school. I was smart, but I wasn’t cute or glamorous. I had a major
crush on the most popular guy in school, Kevin Moore. He was the
captain of the football team, and he drove a shiny convertible. He
was my lab partner. Then he was my first date, my first kiss, my
first boyfriend. Since he was popular, and I wasn’t, we kept our
relationship low-key. He was rich and I was middle class. I get why
he wasn’t proud to be seen with me. My meeting with his rich
parents was a disaster. At dinner, they were trying to be polite,
but my lack of experience in using the crab cracker made his mother
show her real spots. And according to her, I wasn’t posh and well
bred enough to be with her son. Kevin dumped me the next
day.