Killing Me Softly (21 page)

CHAPTER FORTY

"I, um, didn't exactly
find
Jenna."

"What do you mean, you didn't find her? How did you bring her back if you didn't find her?"

"I, um, ahhh, let me start at the beginning. That night that she was here, that she interrupted us ..."

"Yeah, the night she slashed her wrists in my brand new bathroom. I remember."

"When I left, I was a little nervous that something bad would happen. I mean, she's obviously unstable, and you were very upset, so I sat in my truck out front and waited for a little while."

"So you did think that I had it in me to kill her?"

"No, I was worried about what she would do to you. Then, finally, Jenna came running out. She was holding a towel to her arms, and was covered in blood. I thought she stabbed you. I hopped out of my truck and confronted her. She was on the verge of hysterics. She kept saying that she needed help. I finally got out of her that the blood was hers and not yours. I wanted to take her to the hospital."

"Oh, thank God you were there Max." Relief floods through me. "I've felt so guilty about letting her leave in that condition, especially in her condition. Even if I didn't help her for her, I should have helped her for the sake of her baby."

Max looks uncomfortable. Or should I say, more uncomfortable? He clears his throat before continuing. "So, she asked me to help her."

"Did you take her to the hospital?"

"No, um, that wasn't what she wanted. She told me she would explain everything, if I could just pick her up in a few hours."

"Pick her up? Where?"

"Um, Synder's Lake. By the gazebo."

"That's on the opposite side from where they found the car."

"She didn't say so at the time, but I've since figured out she ditched her car and then walked around to meet me."

I don't like where this is going. Not one little bit. "So then what?"

Max exhales, staring at the mug between his hands. He won't look at me, and I can't look away from him. "I picked her up and brought her to the B&B. She stayed there for a few days until I found another one for her about three hours away."

I feel as if he's punched me in the gut and stepped on my trachea all at the same time. I can't speak.

"Sadie." He finally looks up, those big blue eyes pleading with me. "Sadie, please say something."

I swallow, trying to find my voice. "What did you tell the police when they asked then? Certainly you knew I was under suspicion of killing Jenna. "

"Well, I knew you didn't do it. I wasn't concerned." He's so matter-of-fact. I'm livid. I jump up, slamming my hands down on the table. My hot coffee splashes onto my hand, and in some deep, recessed part of my brain, I register pain.

"You knew where she was all this time? Why didn't you say anything?"

He shrugs. "She asked me not to."

"Are you freakin' kidding me? She asked you not to? That's the best you can do?" I finally pull my hand back. I stomp over to the counter, grab a towel, and wipe up my mess on the table. A pink hue is spreading over the back of my hand. Great. Just what I need right now. Running the hand under cool water, I try to gain some composure.

Max is now standing behind me. I am so angry. Rage like I've never felt sears through my veins.

"Sadie, I thought I was helping you," he says quietly.

"Helping me? HELPING ME? You have got to be kidding me right now. HELPING ME? I thought my sister was dead and it was all my fault. I thought that she committed suicide, killing herself and her baby, and that I was the only one who could have stopped it. I have been laid off from my summer job because the customers thought I was a murderess. And I felt so guilty that I didn't—wouldn't—defend myself. And in the middle of all of this, my dad dies. So you, Mr. Knight in Shining Armor, decide to take my sister out of the picture like some deus ex machina."

"A what?"

"A deus ex machina. God by machine. It's a Latin term in literature for when they need a character to disappear, the gods swoop down from nowhere and cart the character away."

"I thought you taught American history?"

"It doesn't mean that I don't remember my literature from when I was in high school. Sister Mary Catherine was a very good teacher." Then I remember what brought this conversation up in the first place, and I am able to refocus my anger. "Dammit, Max, what the hell were you thinking?"

He shrugs again. So help me God, if he shrugs one more time, I am going to really lose it. "I thought it would help you. I mean, it's obvious that you two don't get along, and that you don't like her. She was always barging in on you, and it really seemed to upset you. I thought it was like a two-birds-with-one-stone thing."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Helping her leave town would help her, which she obviously needed, and it would help you by getting her out of your hair."

"So that was her plan all along? To leave town? Why? Why was she leaving and why was it such a rush?"

Max takes a step closer to me, but I hold up my hand to halt him. I want him nowhere near me. Max betrayed me. With my sister.

How has this happened to me? Again.

Obviously, it wasn't the same sort of betrayal, but it was still a betrayal. You know, maybe I had the right idea with swearing off love. I thought I was doing it so that I wouldn't hurt the other person. It turns out, I need to worry more about myself getting hurt.

And why, for someone with clairvoyance, do I keep getting blindsided by these things?

I want Max out now, but I have so many more questions for him. "Go sit down."

He does. I take a deep breath and sit back down as well. I can do this. It's like my first day teaching, facing that first class. I can't let him know how shaken I am on the inside. No, I need to fake it until I make it.

"So, you hid and harbored Jenna for a week. Did you get all warm and cozy with her?"

"Let's just say, I found out more about her than I ever wanted to."

"What was the plan again? I'm a little confused about this whole thing." My hands are folded on the table, my left hand still smarting from the burn. My back is ramrod straight. Slouching down in his chair, Max refuses to meet my eyes. I wait for him to start.

"I thought if I helped Jenna leave town, which is what she wanted, it would make your life better."

"So that's it?"

"Yeah, that's it." He looks up. I can tell by the look on his face that it is so not it. I cannot deal with any more deception.

"What? What else is there? What aren't you telling me?"

"I think you need to talk to your sister."

"She's the last person I want to talk to. I mean, after you of course."

Quietly he says, "I was just trying to help."

"You need to leave." My voice is eerily steady.

"Sadie, don't—"

"No, Max, you need to leave right now." I glance up at the clock. It's quarter after six. The fact that we're sitting together early in the morning finally pushes me over the edge. I snap, all steadiness gone. "Oh my God. You came here last night, expecting sex! You've been lying to me all this time! You
helped
  my sister disappear! You withheld that knowledge. All that time, I was in agony because I thought I was responsible—oh my God! And then you kissed me! You spent the night in my bed! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Sadie—"

"No, Max. I'm done. You're done. I ... you ... please leave. Now."

Without saying a word, he gets up and goes into the bedroom, where his shoes sit innocuously by the side of my bed. My bed! I can't believe I let him stay here! I almost slept with him. I guess I can be thankful that something stopped me and I didn't. That little instinct of mine saved me this time. Too bad it hasn't helped me more. I guess it did tell me not to get involved with Max. I should have listened.

Max walks with the slumped posture of a defeated man. I can't even believe he did this. He helped Jenna disappear. He kept her hidden all week. He brought her back to my dad's funeral.

"Wait! Before you go ..."

Max stops and turns expectantly, hope in his eyes.

"Why the funeral? Why did you bring her back for that?"

His shoulders sag again. "Sadie, I know you're angry, but you have to know I thought I was helping. I just wanted to help. I figured they would realize there was no crime and that she took off."

"So why the funeral?"

"You need to talk to Jenna to find that out. Let's just say I came into possession of knowledge that changed the picture."

"What? What did you find out?"

"You need to hear it from Jenna. It's not my place to say. I brought her back to make things right. You said you couldn't believe she wouldn't be there for it. I wanted to make things right. I hope you can believe me and forgive me."

Make things right

"Max, I don't know if I'll ever be able to do either." I pull open the door for him to leave.

"Sadie, please. You have to believe me."

"How? How can I? You knew I had major trust issues. You know what Rob did to me."

"But I thought you broke up with him. Isn't that what you said that morning at the B&B?"

"That's not the point. He still betrayed me.
With my sister.
Just like you did."

"I didn't mean to betray you. I was trying to help."

"Help? You thought this was helping? Bringing her back in the middle of the funeral. She knocked over my father's casket for Christ's sake! And then you come here, and try to sleep with me! What did you think I would do when I found out that you were harboring my sister?"

Max opens and closes his mouth, unable to say anything in his own defense. "You need to go, Max."

He steps past me and keeps going without looking back. He only stops walking when he realizes Fitzy is walking toward him.

Awesome.

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

I hold the door open for Fitzy who enters without saying a word. It's revolving doors around here. One guy out, one guy in. Too bad that neither one is the guy for me.

"Did I come at a bad time?"

I sigh and head back into the kitchen. As much as I love my house, at this moment, it irks me that I have to walk from the front door, through the living room and dining room, before I can get into my kitchen. I need some coffee. My hand has had more than my mouth has. I look down and there's an angry red blotch on the back of my hand. It hurts something wicked. I grab a bag of peas out of the freezer and put it on the burn.

Sitting back down at the table, I take a sip of my coffee which is now cold. I don't care. I don't feel like heating it up. It's going to be another hot day. Fitzy looks at the cup left behind by Max.

"Is this seat taken?"

"Not anymore." And with that, I put my head down on the table.

"Everything all right?" Fitzy is fussing around. He clears the mug away and I hear him put it in the sink. I sort of expect him to start rooting around in the fridge like he did that first day, but instead he sits down.

"Peachy."

"Regretting your walk of shame?"

I lift my head. "For your information, I'm in my own home. I didn't have to do the walk of shame. And, not that's it any of your business, but nothing happened. Although I did find out some interesting information about Max and Jenna."

"I'm glad you brought that up. It's why I'm here."

That makes me sit up. "Yes, I know, Max helped Jenna leave town and kept her hidden."

"That's what he told you?"

I do not like his tone. Not at all. "Yes. Is there more I need to know?" I ask cautiously. In all honesty, I'm not sure that I want to know any more. I tell Fitzy that.

His face is totally shut down, and he's in business mode. Oh, this is not good. "Fitz, just spit it out and tell me what you need to. I don't know that things can get that much worse, but lay it on me."

"Sadie, things can get worse. And they're about to."

Great.

"I wanted to come here and tell you before you find out any other way. You have to try and stay calm though."

"When someone says that, it means they're going to tell you something so bad that there's no possible way you can remain calm."

A little smile spreads on his face. "Pretty much."

I take the bag of peas off my hand, examining my burn for a minute. It just feels numb right now. I wish I could put a bag of frozen peas on my brain and heart. Life would be a lot easier. "Okay, go."

He inhales slightly before beginning. "We brought Jenna in last night to find out what happened." I nod, encouraging him to go on. "She confirmed your story about slashing her wrists in your bathroom. She also confirmed that she was not trying to kill herself, but to do something that would force you to help her. So, you called that one."

"Yeah, being right is little consolation right now."

"She then said that when she left Max was still outside, and she convinced him to help her. She had him meet her at the lake. In the meantime, she went home, grabbed some things, left her phone, and drove her car into the lake. She walked around and met up with Max. He took her to some bed and breakfast and put her up there for a few days."

"That's what he told me. I thought nothing was missing from her apartment?"

"I'll, um, get to that in a minute. Apparently, she had a small cache of money that she was able to take. I think her plan was to start over."

"Okay, all this I know. I mean, I'm surprised that she had some money set aside. She's never been that responsible, but maybe impending motherhood had changed her."

"No, it hadn't."

"Why do you say that? Did she have the baby? Did she lose the baby? Did she tell you what happened? Max wouldn't elaborate and told me I need to talk to Jenna."

"That's why I'm here. I don't want you to find this out from Jenna. I think you really would kill her if you could."

I sort of want to throw up when he says this. I know it's bad, but I can't imagine how much worse it can be than what she's already done.

"What is it then, Fitzy? Why can't you leave me alone? Why can't everybody just leave me alone?"

"I'm going to answer the first question now, but hold onto the other questions and ask me those again later."

I look at him expectantly. His face is all business but his green eyes betray a concern. The knot in my stomach tightens sharply.

"I'm here because there's information that you need to know. And when you find out, there's a high probability that you may go ballistic. And if you need to hit something, I want you to hit me. I promise, I'm okay with it. I don't want you going after Jenna."

"It's that bad?" I can't imagine what could possibly be any worse than what she's already done.

"It is. It took all my restraint not to hit her myself. So, I know you're going to want to, so hit me instead." He takes one more breath and then begins. 

"Jenna needed to leave town. That's why she came to you. She thought you would help her, especially if she threatened her own life. She was quite upset when you didn't respond as she had hoped."

"But then Max, ever the knight in shining armor, came to her rescue."

"Yeah. He helped her get out of town. And I think that might have been the end of it, except Max discovered why Jenna needed to leave town so abruptly."

"And why exactly was that?"

"She was scheduled to have an ultrasound. Bernice and George Henderson were supposed to meet her there. That was when someone first got concerned that something had happened to her."

"Yeah, I'm fairly familiar with what happened next."

"The what, yes. The why, no. Jenna couldn't show up at that ultrasound with Bernice and George."

"Why not?"

Fitzy swallows. "Because Jenna wasn't pregnant."

Now I know why they call them bombshells. I can't even form words.

"It turns out, the whole pregnancy was a fabrication. She was never pregnant, and certainly never pregnant by Robin Henderson."

My mouth is dry and my tongue feels about ten times too large for my mouth. I try to swallow. "Wha ... what? I don't understand." My hands are gripping my mug, knuckles white.

"She faked the whole pregnancy. It turns out, which we sort of suspected, and this should make you feel better, Jenna and Robin did not have an affair. They weren't engaged. It was all big fat lie."

"What do you mean?"

"Jenna and Robin weren't together. Apparently, after you broke up with him that night, he went to a bar on his way home. Jenna was there and was too inebriated to drive. He was trying to be the nice guy in giving her a ride home. Jenna asked Rob what he was doing alone in a bar. I guess he confided in her that he had bought an engagement ring for you but chickened out on proposing, and then, for whatever reason, you ended things. She asked to see the ring, and he showed it to her. He was driving her home at that point. She, apparently, was bothered about at how upset Robin was over you, and she tried to seduce him."

"By whipping it out of his pants?"

"I guess. He got caught in the moment, and car met tree. Jenna said she needed to come up with a cover story for what happened, so she slipped the ring on her finger, and you know the rest."

Silence fills the room as I'm in shock. "You mean it was all a lie?"

"All of it. Robin didn't have an affair with your sister. Apparently she's in some financial trouble. She thought she could get money out of Rob's parents if they thought she was having his baby. The stash she had in her apartment was actually Rob's money."

"His rainy day fund." I always thought it was stupid that he kept a pile of cash around for emergencies.

"She had been allowed to take some mementos from his house. Apparently, that's one of the things she took. And, when she left her place, she packed regular clothes, not her maternity ones. It took us a while to realize that."

"She wasn't pregnant."

"No, because she and Rob were never together. She was planning on selling the ring."

"He ... didn't propose?"

"No, the ring was for you."

"But ... why?"

"Why what?"

"Why didn't he propose to me?"

"Didn't you break up with him?"

"Well, yeah, but ..."

"What would you have done if he proposed?"

"I'd probably have said yes." I think about it. If he had popped the question before the bat dive-bombed us, I would have said yes. We might even be married now. And while we'd be together, I think in some ways, I'd be more alone than I am now. I would have married Rob, and it would have been terrible.

"So is there any comfort in knowing he wasn't unfaithful?"

I think about it. I've had so many trust issues since then. And those trust issues contributed to my erratic behavior, which led Max to help Jenna. Oh my God, how did this get so messed up? I sit there, unable to move. My limbs feel heavy and my brain is moving like a tilt-a-whirl. I can't move. I can't do anything.

It was all a lie.