Just My Luck (17 page)

She turned once more, then walked away, her hips swaying, her smooth shoulders rising out of the white material. Even her back was gorgeous. The indentation of her spine, the curve of a shoulder blade, it was all . . . perfect.

“Shit,” Teddy breathed next to him, and Liam couldn’t have agreed more.

But Kristen didn’t leave the stage as all the other models had. She was taking another slow turn in the center now, and then, when she’d faced front again, reaching behind her, pulling down her zip, all the way to her bum. Her gaze far away as the gown fell to the floor and she stepped out of it, like a mermaid rising from the sea foam.

“But what’s a wedding,” the announcer said now to the accompaniment of more murmuring, some laughter and applause, “without a wedding night? At Lambert & Heath, we know that the dress is only half the story. You’ll find a full range of the very finest bridal lingerie in all sizes, to make every bit of your wedding day truly memorable.”

“Bloody hell,” Teddy said on an explosion of breath, and Liam wanted to jump up onto the stage and hustle Kristen straight off it. She was still doing her best, doing that model strut she’d first showed him in the shoe store when she’d tried on her motorcycle boots. But she’d been doing that because she was happy. And she’d been doing it for him.

It wasn’t that he didn’t look. He couldn’t help it. The strapless lace corset with mesh inserts that were even sexier than seeing her bare skin, the garters that held up her stockings, the smooth perfection of her upper thighs, he had a good long look at all of it. And then she got to the end of the runway, straight above him. No smile for him this time, but he was close enough to see the bright dots of color on her cheeks, visible even through the heavy makeup. And, when she turned, her backside as well, thankfully covered, but not any too thoroughly. He had a good view of that, and so did everybody else here, and every TV camera too.

“I’ll have that,” Teddy sighed. “Yes, please.” And it took every bit of Liam’s self-control not to grab him by the throat and choke the words straight out of him.

Kristen hadn’t been sure he’d turn up. She’d arranged to meet him at the gym today, had wanted the comfort and release of climbing with him after what she’d suspected would be a stressful day. And she hadn’t known the half of it. She hadn’t dared to look at him when she’d walked down the runway for the second time, but she’d seen the rigidity of his posture out of the corner of her eye, and it didn’t take much imagination to guess what his reaction would have been.

She’d taken her time changing into her climbing clothes, wiping off the heavy makeup. Delaying the moment when she’d have to see him again until, now, she was ten minutes late.

She spotted him the moment she stepped inside the gym. Standing near the front desk, waiting for her, his expression hard and forbidding in a way she’d only seen, until now, on TV. On the rugby field. And suddenly, something shifted inside her, and she wasn’t dreading this. Suddenly, she was mad.

“What?” she challenged, walking right up to him. “What’s wrong?”

“You know what’s wrong,” he growled, and she quailed for a moment, then gathered her courage again.

“It was for
charity,”
she told him, feeling the anger rise, drowning the embarrassment. “I didn’t want to do it, but I did it anyway. And you didn’t get up and excuse yourself because you didn’t want to see girls in their swimsuits, did you, when they did the beachwear? They were wearing a whole lot less than I was! You’re just upset that it was
me.
Well, every one of those women today was somebody’s daughter, you know. Not just me. Every one of them! And you didn’t mind looking at
them.
You didn’t mind that
they
were showing their bodies.”

“That’s not it,” he protested.

“Then what?” she challenged. Her voice was rising. She never yelled, but she was yelling now, a little bit, and she didn’t care. “And I don’t believe you anyway. It’s that you don’t want anyone to see me like that. Anybody but you. And that I haven’t even let
you
see me like that. You feel like everyone’s looking at what belongs to you. But I
don’t,”
she said, and there were tears in her eyes now. “I
don’t
belong to you. I belong to myself!”

He’d lost the stone face, anyway, was just looking thoroughly upset as he reached for her arm. “Kristen. No. Let’s go outside.” He cast a look around the interested faces turned their way. “Come on,” he urged.

She walked out with him, not wanting to do this part either, but knowing she had to. She was still trembling with anger and disappointment. Liam was just the same as everyone else after all, and that
hurt.

He seated himself on a low concrete wall at the edge of the wharf. “Come on,” he said again, indicating the spot beside him. “Sit down. Let’s talk.”

She sat, because she didn’t know what else to do. Glanced at him once, then looked away.

“It’s not just that,” he said after a moment. “Well, yeh, it’s partly that. I didn’t like everyone looking at you that way. Every man there thinking . . . what they were all thinking. I didn’t like that at all.”

“Well, only the straight ones,” she couldn’t help pointing out. “Which cut it down a fair amount. It was a
fashion
show, Liam.”

He smiled a bit at that, although she could tell the smile was offered reluctantly. “I didn’t like my teammates seeing it,” he admitted. “But that wasn’t all. It was that you did it at all. Because you can’t tell me you wanted to.”

She looked down, then. Picked up her gym bag and set it on her lap, wrapped her arms around it and hugged it to her, just for something to hold on to.

“I didn’t,” she admitted, still not looking at him. “I wouldn’t have minded doing the regular clothes. Well, I didn’t even want to do those, not really. And I
really
didn’t want to do that.”

“Then why did you?” he pressed.

“Because . . .” She sighed. “Because when I said no, at first, everyone thought it was just me being a snotty American again, I could tell. That I didn’t want to help. That I thought I was too good for them. Too . . . You know.”

“Too good-looking,” he suggested. “Entitled.”

“Yeah. That I was stuck on myself. So I had to say yes, don’t you see?”

He was silent for a few moments, and she waited for him to speak, hating that she cared so much. That she was letting him judge her. And at the same time, wanted him to understand.

“So,” he said at last, “your choice was, do something that made you uncomfortable, but that other people wanted you to do. Or say no and make them angry.”

“Yes,” she said with relief. “That was it.”

“You decided,” he said, “that you’d rather disappoint yourself than disappoint anyone else. That making yourself uncomfortable is OK, but making anyone else feel that way is wrong.”

She looked at him in surprise. “Yes,” she said slowly. “I did.”

“D’you see why I was narked, then?” he pressed. “Watching you do something I
knew
was making you feel so bad? And something that made me feel bad too,” he admitted. “Because I did feel bad. Wanted to jump straight up there with you, cover you up, and take you out of there.”

“I wish you had,” she said, beginning to smile, but feeling her mouth trembling a little as she did it. “When I saw you sitting there with your teammates, I wanted to turn around and run. Except that when I turned around,” she added with a shaky laugh, “I was giving you all a pretty good view too.”

“Yes, you were,” he said with a smile of his own. “And I’d just like to say for the record here, I’d love to see every bit of that again. As long as you were only showing it to me.”

“You’re a beautiful woman, Kristen,” he said, and his expression was serious again. “That doesn’t give anyone any rights to you. Just because they want a piece of you, it doesn’t mean you have to give it to them. Because that’s what it feels like, doesn’t it?”

“Yes,” she sighed. “That’s it. That I’m always having to prove I’m a regular person. To go out of my way to do it, or they’ll assume that I think I’m, what you said. Entitled.”

He nodded. “I know, because I get that too. Not so much for my pretty face, oddly enough,” he said, making her smile this time, “but being a footy player, being recognized.”

“Being a celebrity,” she agreed.

“Yeh. Means you have to draw your boundaries. And if something feels wrong to do, don’t do it. That line’s different for everyone. I don’t talk about my private life, but some of the boys have Twitter accounts, and heaps of followers too. Tell everyone when they went to the dentist, what they ate for dinner. Course, could be I don’t do it because I’d be embarrassed that nobody’d want to follow me.”

“No,” she said. “I suspect you don’t do it because you value your privacy.”

“Well, that’s what I tell myself, anyway.”

“You said you’d made some bad choices too, though,” she said. “Which I have to tell you, was such a
relief.”

He laughed at that. “A relief? Glad to help, but how d’you mean?”

“I mean,” she tried to explain, “take Ally, for one. She’s so confident, isn’t she? The first time I met her, she was teaching me to climb. I was such a mess, right after my divorce. I was only doing it because my therapist suggested it, and I was
scared.
And Ally . . . she just seemed so strong. I thought, why can’t I be like that? I still think so, all the time. And then, of course, Hannah.”

“Hannah. Does she climb too, then?”

“No,” Kristen said with a smile. “That’s about the only thing I do better than her. Well, that and dress. She’s still a
terrible
dresser, a lot of the time.”

Liam laughed. “Can’t say I’ve noticed, but I’ll take your word for it.”

“She’s great,” Kristen assured him, “and I love her more than anybody, but she does everything so
right,
you know? It’s so hard not to compare myself to her, especially when she’s right there in front of me, living her perfect life with her perfect husband and her perfect baby and her perfect job. She doesn’t have any idea of what it’s like to get it all so wrong and have to start over, knowing that everybody
knows
how wrong you got it.”

“Everybody’s made some mistakes,” he said firmly. “I’m sure, if you asked her, Hannah’d tell you about all the ones she’s made. May not have been as spectacular as yours, but I imagine they’re there all the same. All you can do, all anyone can do, is stop making the same ones over and over. And that’s exactly what you’re doing.”

She sat for a minute, absorbing what he’d said. Realizing that he was right.

“And d’you want to climb now,” he asked with a smile that went straight to her wounded heart, “or would you rather go straight on to dinner?”

“Climb,” she said with decision. “Please. And then go to dinner with you.”

She reached out impulsively for him, felt him stiffen for a moment before he wrapped those big arms around her, pulled her close. And being held by him, resting against the solidity and the strength of him, felt just as good as she’d always known it would.

She relaxed into him for a few comforting seconds, his cheek warm against hers. Then released him and sat back again.

“Sorry,” she said, feeling the prick of tears. “I just needed a hug.”

“No worries,” he said. “Though I’m beginning to think you were put on this earth to test my self-control. It’s been a hell of a struggle to get it. But that’s nothing to how hard it is to hold onto it when I’m with you.”

A Timid Man

“Here we are,” Nate announced, arriving at the gym’s front desk on Saturday afternoon and finding Ally, as always, waiting for him. Ready for him. “My final lesson. Do I get a bit of a ceremony here? A lovely wee certificate naming me ‘Most Improved?’ Which means, as we all know, that I was rubbish at the start, and yet I’m still here, but maybe not quite such rubbish.”

She laughed. Lately, she’d been looking more than pleased to see him. And today, she also looked . . . excited. And a bit nervous, too. Which was fairly cheering, wasn’t it?

“You
are
the most improved, and you know it,” she said. “I’ve never seen anyone work so hard.”

He shrugged, but felt a glow of pleasure at her words. “Training’s what I do. And learning. If you’re not trying to get better, it’s time to hang up the boots. Reckon climbing isn’t much different.”

“Not much different at all,” she said. “But you’re good to do it today? You sure? After playing last night?”

“Yeh. I’m good.” Truth was, he was sore. But a bit of climbing wouldn’t hurt him. And he wouldn’t have canceled this for anything. “Let’s go for it.”

“All right, then,” she decided. “As it
is
your last lesson, we’ll get you on that overhang that we haven’t done yet, last thing today. That’ll be your ceremony, because then you’ll have accomplished everything.”

Well, not everything, he thought, getting himself kitted up. But he was getting closer.

When he stepped lightly down from the final climb, the overhang that he’d never managed to get all the way up before, he had a huge grin on his face. She smiled back at him, put up her hand, and smacked his palm in a high-five.

“Congratulations,” she told him. “Mr. Most Improved.”

 “Thanks to my awesome teacher. And you’re done for the day, eh. Now that you’ve accomplished the impossible here, taught me to climb.”

“I am. Done for the day, I mean,” she said, still smiling. Looking happy to hear what she had to know he’d be asking next.

“So what can we do to celebrate?” he asked. “I brought my togs today. I’m even prepared to jump off high places with you again if I have to.”

She laughed again, and he thought that a man would give a lot to be able to bring that look of pleasure to her face. “I didn’t miss that swimming wasn’t your favorite thing. You were a great sport, though.”

“Also my job,” he pointed out. “So what, then? Want to have dinner with me?” He waited for her answer, still surprised at how much it mattered to him. In fact, he’d rung Logan Brown already, booked a table. Perfect for her, he’d thought. Wellington’s finest restaurant. A beautiful spot, beautiful food, but not too formal. She’d be able to relax, he hoped, be comfortable.