Juilliard or Else (50 page)

I dropped down to my knees in my closet. Why was everything in this stupid world ruining my chance with Tucker? It was ridiculous.

"Gabs," Jade called out to me, but once again, I was frozen and couldn't move. I heard her steps as she moved cautiously to me and started rubbing my back. I turned to her and cried into her chest.

"Jade," I mumbled

She smoothed my hair down my back. "I know, I know."

Did she know? Did she understand?

"Who called you to come over?"

Jade smoothed down my hair on my back, giving me the only comfort that was missing in my life right now. "Your dad did. Said that something was wrong. I passed Tucker on the way in; he was begging me to have you come out and talk with him. Gabs, tell me what happened now."

I sat up and wiped the fallen tears off my face. "He was dealing! After he promised me he was done. I can't be around that crap, Jade, I can't."

"Okay, drama queen, no need to shout. I'm right here," Jade said while pulling on her ear. I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my mouth. Jade leaned in and hugged me again.

"Jade, everything is falling apart. Everyone thinks I'm marrying Alex; it was in a magazine."

"I know, it's a shitty situation. Now listen to me." Jade cupped my wet cheeks and made me look at her in the eyes. Her soft ice blue eyes were rimmed with black eyeliner. "I love you, Gabs. Losing Rachel sucked, but I can't lose you, too. I'll go insane. This one time, I think you should listen to that step monster of yours. Pack and go with them, clear your damn head. Get away—I think it's best for you and the baby right now. All this pressure with, Carol, Alex wanting to marry you and Tucker, it's gonna kill ya." I couldn't help but laugh again. Jade ignored me and continued on. "The semester is over. I even talked with Madame Ava, too. She said she hopes to see you next year and wishes nothing but the best for you and come on, Alex is rushing this. They are trying to pressure you."

More tears ran down my face as I thought about Madame Ava. She was a brilliant teacher who made me a stronger and better ballerina. I would never forget her.

"Do you hear me Gabs?" I nodded in her hands. "Good, I'll help you."

Jade moved at a snail's pace with my clothes, putting them in my half-packed suitcase from Carol's attempt earlier. I heard a couple of sniffs from inside the closet as she gathered more of my clothes, and when I asked if she was crying, she yelled at me to shut up. Me leaving Jade behind was going to be hard on her; she needed to keep going, keep her head up high.

"Are you going to still see Dr. Walters?"

"Yeah, probably. I need to see someone if you're going to be gone. I'm gonna move out of the apartment; I can't stay there by myself."

I completely understood that. Not only would she be alone, she made memories there – memories that would drive her crazy. I reached for Jade and hugged her as tightly as I could, and for the first time, she hugged me back just as tight.

A soft knock sounded at my door, I quickly wiped my face and called out "come in" and my dad opened my door.

"You ready, angel?" he asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Well, I guess that sums it up about Carol already telling my dad that I was packing. I believed it was good for me to get away – get away from all the crazy things in my life. I wouldn't be gone forever; I couldn't keep Tucker's baby away from him. I wouldn't be that person to keep their child away from their parent.

"Yeah," I breathed out and Jade hugged me from behind again. I patted her hands and this time, I did hear her soft cries into my shoulder. "I'll be right there, Daddy."

"It's just like the olden days were a girl gets knocked up and they sweep her off to the country. Your parents are fast movers," Jade said.

I turned in her arms while we fell to the floor, just hugging and rocking back and forth. This time, it was me who cupped Jade's face to look at her – she had depression written all over it. My palms were soaked with her tears.

"Now you listen to me, Jaiden Monroe. You stay strong, no more hurting yourself, you have any problems, and I'm one phone call away. Okay?" She nodded. "I'm not going to be gone forever, just think of it like a spring vacation. I'll call you as soon as I land back in New York; you can even come get me from the airport."

"No, I'm not your maid service." I wiped Jade's tears and tried to fix her blackened makeup, but really, I think I was just making it worse. I hugged Jade one more time before she walked out my room. I walked down the stairs to the living room where my dad stood waiting for me; his back was to us and he was on the phone. I had to thank the Greek Gods that Carol wasn't with him. I don't think I could take her right now.

"Carol, don't you dare do that. No, you stop right now and you head straight for the airport. I'm not kidding, Carol, you…hello? Damn it."

I speed walked over to my dad, who was mad, and of course, it was Carol who pissed him off.

"Daddy?" He jumped at my touch on his arm. "What's wrong?"

He exhaled, "Nothing, Angel. You all ready to go?"

Something was wrong, as his face was flushed and his brows were beading with sweat. This only happened when he was mad or in the court room. He reached for my bags that Jade helped me with and we made our way towards the front door. For once, I was hoping that Tucker wouldn't be on the other side. He broke a huge promise to me.

On my dad's heels, with Jade holding my hand, I braced myself for Tucker's quick approach to me as we made our way out the front door. I held my breath as we took our steps out to the busy New York traffic with no sign of Tucker. I glanced up, and then down the sidewalk. Nope. He wasn't here. I even looked across the street to see if maybe he was waiting for me. Nope. Not there either. Inside I was happy that he wasn't here, but there was that tiny part inside that wished he was.

Ugh! I'm such a big mess right now. Back and forth, back and forth.

My dad loaded our entire luggage into the trunk of my dad's silver Bentley. It was the exact same as Carol's black luxury car. I faced Jade again who was biting the crap out of her bottom lip.

"That's a bad habit, you know." I eyed her swollen lip and she let if free from her teeth. Jade didn't give me a sharp remark like she usually does – just stared at me.

"I'll call you when I get there, okay?" She nodded and I hugged her again. "Unless you want to come with me, because I can hide you in my suitcase." She let out a small laugh.

"That sounds so tempting, but Carol is worse than Stella. So no, I'm gonna pass on that. But I have a gift for you. This is one of my favorite books and authors." Jade pulled out a book from her purse with a violin on it; it was a beautiful cover.

"Thank you." I turned to start getting in the car, but putting the book in my purse quickly, I saw something that caught my eye. Reaching in, I grabbed something of Jade's – something that we both shared in the past and something that brought us together in the first place.

I quickly turned and said, "I think you'll need these." I tossed the unopened pack of cigarettes to her and she caught them. "I heard they calm the nerves." I gave her a wink and slid into the soft leather seats.

The drive to the airport seemed to take forever. My dad repeatedly called someone on his cell. My guess was Carol. That damn woman had a mind of her own and she wasn't going to let anyone stop her from getting in the way of what she wants. Only about twenty seconds after the car pulled out from the curb, my phone chimed and it was Jade.

Jade: Thanks for the smokes, my nerves are settled ;)

Me: Happy to have helped

Jade: Bow chicka wow wow

I laughed.

Me: lol…What?

Jade: Nothing, dumbass…. Call when you land and enjoy your reading material

Me: okay! Love ya

Jade: you too!

The traffic hit really bad on the bridge heading into The New York Airport. We sat for a good twenty minutes in the same spot. My dad was still calling someone on his phone while yelling at Jordan, our driver, to hurry and that we had a flight to catch. Poor Jordan – he couldn't move the traffic for the life of him. I sat back and flipped through my phone and stopped when I came across a picture that Jade took of me while Tucker was giving me my tattoo on my hip. My face was scrunched up in pain with the heel of my hands digging into my eyes.

Yep, that hurt.

Even though it wasn't a big tattoo, it still hurt. I stared at the scripted letters of 'Juilliard' in black ink with the little pretty pink ballet shoes. I wasn't supposed to get a tattoo, but before I even found out I was pregnant, I'd had a feeling this was going to be my one year at Juilliard. I wanted to make it a memory. It was the memory I wanted; now it was etched into me, so I would always remember what made me so happy once upon a time.

Traffic started to move again, but was as slow as could be. Our car finally pulled up to the curb and my dad rushed out.

"Jordan, the trunk!" he yelled around the noisy taxis.

The trunk popped while Jordan and my dad started pulling out our luggage. My phone started ringing with Tucker's ringtone; my stomach was a bundle of tied up knots as I answered it.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?"

I sniffed; I was going to cry just from hearing his voice. "The airport."

I heard glass shatter. "What why? Where are you going?" My dad took my spare hand and pulling me through the doors of the noisy airport.

"I'm going away with my parents."

"Fuck!" Tucker yelled loud enough that I had to pull the phone away from my ear. "Abigail, don't take my kid away from me."

I shook my head as if he could see me. "I wouldn't do something like that to you, Tucker."

"Yeah, you won't, but what about your dad, even Carol? They have power and money."

I glanced up at my dad who was staring down at me. I knew he just heard Tucker's words.

"Tucker, I have to go now."

"Not until you tell me where you're going."

We walked onto the escalators, heading towards security. "Paris."

Silence and then a soft knock on a door on Tucker's end. "Gabs, you leave the country, I can't come after you. I hope you understand that's the decision you're making." I heard the squeaky front door open as he hung up on me. I walked through the rest of security thinking about what Tucker told me. He couldn't chase after me if I left the country. He was right; I wasn't just making this decision for me but our baby as well.

"David McCall?" I glanced at my dad who was on his lawyer phone. "No, I don't think it's a good idea. Just leave her alone for now." He paused and I studied his face, his brows drawn together. Even I knew this wasn't good. "Listen to me; I don't care what she told you. We are taking her away for a little bit to help clear her head."

He was talking about me. I bet it was to Alex. My dad looked at me with an apologetic look and pushed his glasses back up his nose. We continued to walk through the airport to our gate as my dad still muttered into the phone. I fumbled on my phone and decided to text Jade to let her know that I got to the airport and I wanted to send one more text to Tucker.

Me: Tucker, I'm sorry. But I have to go. Bye.

My phone chimed back not even thirty seconds later.

Tucker: Don't do this, Abigail.

Tears slowly streaked down my face as I stuffed my phone into my purse. All I had now were memories of me and Tucker. I didn't want to leave him, but I felt as if I didn't have a choice. Carol and my dad held a lot of power over me. I knew that it sounded extremely stupid and a poor excuse, but my dad was a very powerful lawyer who could put Tucker away for a long time if anything happened to me or to his grandchild. My dad could be so ruthless and could convince any jury of anything. I found my iPod and put my headphones in to block out my thoughts, and of course, the one song started playing that reminded me so much of Tucker,
My Boo
by Usher. This song was us, in and out. My hand caressed my little baby bump while my dad held my other hand. The cover of the book caught my eye. I pulled it out, listening to the heartbreaking words as I flipped through the pages.

My dad tapped on my shoulder and took out my right earphone. "Abigail, you know how much I love you, right?" I nodded. "I'm doing this to protect you, angel. I don't want you to hurt from this boy. And you must know that Alex will be coming along with us."

"Dad," I groaned while taking out my other earphone. "I don't want Alex here. I don't want him. Can't you guys just stop it?" I was stomping my foot like a child.

"I know, it's all Carol's doing. Told him that we were heading to Paris early and he says he wants to come."

"Ugh, this sucks. Dad, he just wants in the firm. Don't you get that? He doesn't want me anymore than I want him. He just wants to be tied to you through me." My voice was getting louder with every word. I stood up from my chair and went to stand in front of the windows, watching the planes taxi around. I saw Alex's approach to my dad who stood up and shook hands with him. This was it; I was going to be forced in another situation I dreaded. I had to change it. The book was still in my hands as I continued to turn page by page, not really reading but just taking in the words of the author. It was then I read a paragraph, a paragraph that could mean a thousand different things to everyone.