Authors: MJ Field
10
I wasn’
t sure I how many times exactly I had picked up the phone that day to text or call her, but it was definitely more than I would ever admit. I knew where I fucked up. But it wasn’t because I was trying to lie to her. At the airport we should have talked. Instead of letting her drag me into the bathroom I should have been stronger and said no and finished the story.
But who the fuck am I kidding
? Carly on her knees, sucking me off was not something I would have expected out of her in a million years. Watching her lips wrap around me, taking as much as she could still caused my fucking jeans to shrink. I was never one to take without giving at least a little something in return, but there wasn’t time. I’m so pissed at myself right now for not getting her off. I’m sure that’ll be a topic at book club in the near future,
FUCK
!
I sat in my room at the shop, waiting for my last appointment until I could go pick Little Bell up from school. When
she and I were together, everything was cool. She was so much fun, so inquisitive about everything and looking at her, absolutely reminded me of when times were much easier. Mom had asked me once if it hurt to look at Bella. If the loss of Charlee came back. It didn’t, having her in my life made the loss less painful.
When the whole family ate dinner a few weeks ago to celebrate my best friend Abe’s graduation from the NYU MBA program
, Little Bell brought up Carly. Abe didn’t even react and it had never been discussed. Bella mentioned the similarity between the pictures of her Momma and Carly and my brothers all shifted uncomfortably at the same time. When I tucked her in and she fell asleep I walked into the living room expecting all hell to break loose. Abe and I stared at each other and I was ready to take whatever ass whooping I had coming. I would never fight Abe, so I just simply asked he not touch my face so I didn’t have to explain it to my daughter. Abe laughed and so did my brothers. The discussion about the similarities continued which pissed me off. The mention that Charlee and Carly’s names sounding alike infuriated me. Then how young Carly seemed and the age that Charlee died. I left the room pissed, and went to bed without even saying goodnight to any of them.
The day we walked into court two years ago we had what was thought to be the best lawye
r’s around. I was in my last semester in line to earn my undergraduate degree in business with a concentration on international business at NYU, with an SAT score of six hundred and ninety, I was given a full ride and had already been approved for the MBA program. That’s where I’d met Abe, my best friend. When we lost, due to the fact that they had moved Bella without anyone even knowing to Colorado, we had nothing left to fight with. I gave up on school and on life. Drinking, smoking, and fucking anything I could get my hands on. When Dad died it was no better. That’s where Pam came in the picture. One drunk night she held my head out of the toilet at a party and fucked me stupid. When I woke up on the floor of her bedroom in a McMansion in a posh neighborhood, I remembered nothing except that Pam was Charlee’s best friend. I showered and was ready to leave when she pulled out a photo album full of pictures of my Little Bell. My heart pounded so hard, it felt like it was going to explode. Looking at all of the pictures: the Christmas’s, Birthday’s, every fucking holiday and special event in her life, broke me. Pam was the closest thing to Charlee and Bella that I could get my hands on. I was her dirty secret off and on for months. Her big shot Columbia boyfriend hung out with her at school all day, and when he wasn’t around she and I fucked like monkeys all night. When I ended it, it was cool… but then I’d see her at a party, and she would always share something about my daughter. She broke up with her boy, whose name I never even knew, and for two years we played that game. Whenever I had enough-- she wanted more. I used her, without a doubt. But she did the same. We’d discussed it when I got the call and I told her I would not take Bella out of her life as long as she respected my boundaries and so far she had. But how the hell would I get that to fly with Carly?
Abe, God he was going to be pissed. Abe and I talked the day after he found out about Carly and I. He had asked if that was why I had started taking classes again. It wasn’t, I wanted more for Bella, my Mom, and
now Charlotte as well. I only had two more classes and I would graduate. He promised not to mention Carly and I promised that I wouldn’t hurt her. I’d broken that promise. I had hurt her and then I lashed out at her knowing I had brought it all on myself.
I walked out into the hall and up to the reception desk and sat down. When the phone rang I answered it. I listened to the man with a thick Italian accent inform me
who he was, and that Isabella Segreti De Luca had passed away. They were looking for Josephina Steel and her children. I jotted down all the information I was given and gave him my personal number. Antonio Rossi was my Grandmothers lawyer, and he would be waiting for my return call.
I looked up as Cyrus walked in, “Shit man
, Frankie cancelled. I totally forgot to tell you.”
“Good, you and I need to talk Cyrus, you have a few minutes?”
“Yeah, let’s go,” Cyrus motioned down the hall.
“No man we need to take a walk.”
I told Cyrus everything I knew and he flat ass refused.
“I have more to think about the
n just myself here, and so do you.”
“I
ain’t got shit anymore, Sandy came in and fucked my life hard. I want no fucking responsibility. I’m over the moon happy for you Jase but there ain’t shit tying me down ever again.”
He stood an
d walked to the water and cursed it for a good fifteen minutes before he turned around and looked at me, “What the fuck do you think you’re…”
“There is no me Cyrus, it
’s both of us or nothing at all. Forever Steel bro.”
Cyrus growled and walked towards me and gave me a hug and pounded my back once, “For Mom and Little Bell bro, Forever Steel. Now tell me what the fuck the plan is.”
~
After I finally got Bella to sleep
, I decided to call Carly, she was going to be fucking pissed and I couldn’t blame her.
“Hello?”
“Hey Baby, how are you?” I tried to play it cool.
“Are you serious right now? How am I?” Yeah
, she was fucking pissed.
“Fine
you’re pissed, I get it. Look, I have a lot of shit going on and will not be able to get in early to Denver. I am going to hit court and jet back here. You alright with just waiting until March?”
I waited for a reply and then looked at the phone, she had hung up.
-Baby come on, we need to talk…Jase
- No we
don’t…C
-Baby, please. I know I’
ve been an ass. I just want to explain a few things…Jase
- So do I. I hate you! You’r
e mean! You suck! I don’t ever want to talk to you again! And yes I am acting like a sixteen year old girl and that’s YOUR FAULT, leave me alone!...C
-You don’t hate me-- I was mean. So do
you, (that’s supposed to be funny). You will talk to me again, maybe not for a while, but you will or I will stalk you like a sixteen year old boy, which will be your fault because I can’t leave you alone. I love you, baby…Jase.
I read over my message and smiled knowing it would make her laugh and sent
it. After fifteen minutes she still had not replied.
-I’
ll wait to hear from you, give you time to cool down. Don’t try to run to Brad cause I will fucking ruin him!...Jase
-GROW UP!
YOU’RE A FATHER!...C
-Yeah and one day you
r fine little ass will be calling me Daddy, too…Jase
I couldn’
t believe I sent that, what the fuck was I thinking? I waited for ten minutes.
-Goodnight Baby, falling asleep, already having fallen for you…Jase
-Fuck off!...Carly.
I smiled
, she would regret that too
.
I sent Abe a text with information that was to be deleted as soon as he read it. I trusted this man with my life, and I knew he felt the same.
-Are you out of your fucking mind?…Abe
-That’s debatable, you in….Jase
-Fuck yeah, name the time and the place…Abe
I smiled and sat back and texted him
.
-Will send info tomorrow, glad to have you on board…Jase
I showered and picked my Little Bell up and hugged her tightly.
This is going to change everything for all of us,
she smiled in her sleep and I knew that nothing would ever stop me now
.
~
I dropped Bella off at school and went to the shop. Cyrus was going to talk to Mom when he and I parted ways yesterday and then met me.
I walked in and she was
pacing, “You will not do this Jase! Your father…”
“Gave everything he and you had to try to get my daughter back for me. I am going to hear what they have to say
, Momma…”
“Don’t you Momma me,” she
started crying and I hugged her. “They will suck the life out of you Jase, all of you.”
“You didn’t raise a bunch of idiots Mom. I have Bella back, we
all
have Bella back. Charlotte is dying and we have taken that on. I will not make any decisions until we have talked.”
“Your classes
, Jase,” Mom cried, “You’re almost finished!”
“I’
ve already talked to my mentor and Professors. I’m taking my midterms tonight…”
“Carly, you are to meet her…”
“No, I cancelled. Momma, I have everything in order. Come with us, you loved her.”
“But she didn’
t fight for me!”
“She stood by your father, that’s what she was taught,” I hated seeing my mother cry and hurt and
struggling, but that is why it had to happen.
“Your brothers…”
“Forever Steel Momma. They will stay and run the shop, we won’t be gone long…”
“Bella?”
“She can come, or Pam’s mother has offered many times to watch over both her and Charlotte if we needed her too.”
“It’s too much.”
Okay this could go on for days, “I won’t argue, you are either in, or out.”
She scowled at me, “I won’t
have you go alone.”
I smiled and she
smacked me and then cursed in Italian and disappeared into the back.
Cyrus walked out of his room
and laughed, “How did that go?”
“As expected, and Abe is coming with us.”
“No shit?” Cyrus smiled.
“None.”
~
I sat in bed holding the sleepy Little Bell
, again having to explain why I was gone for five days, “I now own you Little Bell,” I laughed and smiled at her.
“So I will live here forever?”
“Yeah,” I pulled the dark strand of hair off her cheek and kissed it.
“Daddy
, people don’t own people?” she was asking a question.
“No, I have custody of you
,” damn she was smart and tired. “Alright, lights out.”
“You
're not leaving again?”
“No, not for a
while. Next time I go you come too,” the few times I talked to her while in Prato, she was upset, it broke my heart that she even questioned if I was coming back, I would not ever again leave her for that long.
When Bella fell asleep
I looked at the clock, Abe and my brothers would be here soon. Mom had no intention of spending her golden years fighting with the likes of Benito and Antonio De Luca for her family’s money, a family she had been estranged from for over twenty years. I laughed when she said golden years and she smacked me in the back of the head, typical. She was forty four years old.
Cyrus and Abe showed first.
“Abe, you look like shit,” I laughed he really did. Abe was a preppy bastard. Even when he tried not to look like it, he did. Typical blond hair blue eyed, all-American-boy, type.
“Laugh all you want, I
haven’t slept since we got back, and you’ll be happy I didn’t. You have no idea what you’re in for,” Abe looked like Bella did when she saw me for the first time. Like she knew me, but never believed I was real.
“Good or bad Abe?”
“Both man, this is fucking amazing. I did a quick financial overview of De Luca incorporated and went over the will with a fine tooth comb, made notes and took it to one of the law professors. Dude-- you have no idea what Isabella DeLuca did by giving twelve percent. Her lawyer Rossi was cryptic as hell but he made sure you had everything you needed to…”
Mom walked in
, causing Abe to stop. Xavier and Zandor followed.
“Abe thank you for putting this all together. I still don’t like any of this
. DeLuca is a snake and I am assuming his son is worse. I’ve talked to your brothers about my concerns and they want nothing to do with this.”