Into the Blue (A Wild Aces Romance) (21 page)

Becca straddled me, her naked body calling to me like a homing beacon. I lay beneath her, fully clothed in my flight suit while she . . . explored. It had been quick and desperate between us back in my office, but now that we were in bed, she seemed eager to take her time, and as much as she was slowly killing me, I was only too happy to indulge her.

I groaned as she reached between us, taking advantage of my open zipper and slipping inside the slit of my boxers, her hand fisting my cock.

We’d gotten back to my rental house and she’d pounced. She seemed fascinated by my flight suit, taking her time until I was lying here with an aching cock and an escalating need to get inside of her.

She knew it, too.

She slid down my body . . .

Fuck. Yes.

Becca took me into her mouth, her hand gripping the base, her tongue licking me over and over again, swirling
around the tip, sucking me deep, taking the orgasm barreling toward me to a whole other level.

My eyes closed and I fell back against the pillow, losing myself to her lips, her tongue, her hands, the way she moaned around my dick. I reached down, rubbing my thumb over her nipple, cupping her breast, her moans growing louder.

“Babe. I can’t. I’m so close. Babe.”

Our gazes locked, and then she was straddling me, giving me exactly what I wanted, her hands guiding my cock inside her with agonizing slowness, inch by fucking inch.

I groaned as she contracted around me, her body drawing me deeper and deeper inside until I couldn’t take it anymore and I lifted my hips, thrusting deep. Our hands found each other, our palms touching, fingers linking midair as I pumped into her, as her body swayed over mine, all soft curves and sexy lines.

I brought her to the edge, watched her orgasm hover just out of her grasp, and then my thumb found her clit, sliding into the slippery wetness, taking her over the edge so that she came apart, her body quaking over mine, pushing me past the finish line as my balls tightened and I came hard, my gaze on her.

Becca leaned forward, wrapping her arms around me, hugging my body close to hers as we both relaxed into each other. She tipped her face up, her chin resting on my chest, eyes full of mischief.

“Have I ever told you that I sort of have this thing about you all dressed up for work?” she asked, echoing my words from earlier.

I burst into laughter. “Somehow I didn’t expect that. I figured you’d be more briefcases and business suits than helmet bags and flight suits.”

“I guess you changed my mind.” She moved closer to me, her hand stroking down my stomach. “I like your place, by the way.”

Considering how eager I’d been to get her naked, I hadn’t exactly given her much time to see it.

“Thanks.” I shrugged. “It’s just temporary. Some guys buy houses when they PCS, but I figured it was more hassle than it was worth.”

“That makes sense considering how short your assignments are.”

She sat up in bed, the sheets dropping to her waist, her long hair falling down over her breasts.

So fucking beautiful.

“So explain how your assignment process works. When do you find out where you’re moving next?”

I would have been lying if I didn’t admit that I was nervous to have this conversation with her, afraid she’d freak out the same way she had before. Becca’s entire life had been about needing structure, about finding stability after the loss of her parents. The only thing that was guaranteed about my lifestyle was that there were no guarantees, no way to predict what would happen next. You had to be able to go with the flow, and Becca was all about control.

“The active duty service commitment I signed in exchange for the Air Force training me to fly is nearly up. I have a year left. I should find out where I’m moving in the next month or so. When that happens, I’ll have about a week to decide if I’m going to accept that assignment or get out.

“If I decide to get out, I’ll still have to finish out the year, and I probably will extend it for a few months because the squadron really needs instructor pilots and more experienced guys for this deployment to Afghanistan.”

“Have you thought more about your options?” she asked.

“I have. I talked to some guys I know who got out and are in the Guard and the Reserve. Either option would still keep me flying. I’d basically keep my rank and benefits; I just would be assigned to one location and wouldn’t have to move every few years.

“I would still deploy, though. Still have to go TDY. And the hours would still be crazy. It’s an option, but I don’t know that it’s going to be one you would be happy with.”

“Would you be happy with it? Independent of me?”

There really wasn’t an “independent of her” anymore, but I knew what she meant.

“Yeah. I would. The more I think about it, I’m starting to burn out on active duty. I like the flying and the squadron’s great, but the higher you get, the more you realize how political everything is. The job becomes less about the kind of pilot you are and more about how well you network.

“You know me. I’m not that guy. I don’t care if I’m a general one day; I just want to fly. The other bullshit that comes with it doesn’t really matter.”

“And the private sector?” she asked, her expression neutral. “Is there anything else you could see yourself doing? Anything else you would be interested in?”

I wanted to tell her that I’d realized my lifelong dream to be a dentist or found a previously undiscovered talent for crunching numbers. Unfortunately, that was not the case. I’d racked my brain thinking of alternative options, only to come up short. I was good at what I did, with a very defined set of skills that didn’t necessarily translate to the civilian world.

“I don’t know,” I hedged. “Maybe? There’s always defense contracting. Not exactly the stuff of dreams, but the money’s good. The life would be stable—”

“And you would be miserable.”

“No. Maybe,” I admitted. “It’s just never seemed like something I would enjoy. I’m not exactly a suit.”

She grinned. “I noticed.” She reached out, linking our fingers together and running her lips over my knuckles. “You looked amazing out there today. You looked like you were in your element, happy, confident. Like the world was yours for the taking and you could do anything while you were in the cockpit.”

I’d never thought of it that way, but she was right—

Flying made me feel like I could do anything. It made the impossible possible.

I’d been going to weekly sessions, talking through my PTSD with a counselor the military had assigned me. So far it was helping more than I’d anticipated. I hadn’t had another freak-out in the jet, and she was right—the last few weeks I’d enjoyed flying more than I had in the last year.

“How do you always do that?” I asked, falling a little more in love with her with each moment that passed.

“Do what?”

“Get me. Know what I’m feeling even before I do.”

She ran her hand through my hair, a smile playing at her mouth. “I love you. I’ve loved you forever. And I see the fire in your eyes when you fly, see the passion there. You wouldn’t be happy behind a desk somewhere. Not after the life you’ve lived. I don’t want to be the cause of you waking up every morning and dreading going to work. It’s so rare to find a job that you love. Don’t throw that away.”

“I don’t think of it as throwing it away. I want to be with you. Want to make this work.”

She leaned forward and kissed me. “I know. And I know I’ve been reluctant to consider military life, but I think you’re right. There can be a compromise here. We should look for something that will let us both do what we love.”

“I think the Guard or reserves could be a good option. There are F-16 units around the country. Would you be okay with moving out of South Carolina if we needed to? That would be it—just the one move and then you could set up your practice somewhere. I know it’s not exactly what you wanted—”

“It’s perfect. If that’s what we need to do, we’ll do it. I can still be an attorney, still build my career.”

“That’s the big positive with it. At the same time, I’m going to be honest, Guard and Reserve spots can be tricky. It’s a timing thing—you have to hope for an open spot when you need it, and depending on the base, they can be competitive. I don’t know for sure that a job will open up, but I’m trying to figure something out. I’ve put out feelers with a bunch of guys I know in the community. We’ll see if anything becomes available.”

“Okay.” She extended her hand to me, a soft smile playing at her lips. “I’m in.”

I took her hand, tugging her back under me.

“Me, too.”

I spent Thanksgiving morning in bed with Eric, watching the parade on his gigantic TV, and the afternoon cooking with Jordan and her friend, Dani, at the house Jordan and her husband, Noah, owned.

“Why is it that the guys are getting away with watching football and we’re in here cooking for ten?” Jordan complained.

I grinned. “Trust me, you don’t want to see Eric cook. I tried to teach him when we lived together in college and finally just gave up. Unless he’s made some radical changes in the last decade, he’s hopeless.”

Not that I was much better.

“Hey, I heard that.” Eric walked up behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist and snagging a deviled egg off the counter in front of me.

I swatted him with the dishtowel. “You have to wait until everyone gets here.”

“Oh, come on. We’re waiting on Easy. He doesn’t count.”

Jordan laughed. “He has a point there. If Easy can’t bother to drag his ass here on time, then all bets are off when it comes to food. Besides, I’m not exactly sure he eats things like deviled eggs. Can you imagine the havoc mayonnaise would wreak on his six-pack?”

“Hey, I’ll have you know it’s an eight-pack, thank you very much,” Easy joked, walking into the kitchen with the swagger I’d come to recognize as standard.

His gaze swept the room and then he froze, his gaze settling on Dani standing near the oven, a ladle in her hands.

Eric told me that Joker’s widow had returned to Oklahoma after spending the months following her husband’s death in Georgia with her family. I hadn’t known what to expect when Eric mentioned she’d be joining us, couldn’t imagine what she was going through or how difficult it must have been to spend her first holiday without her husband.

She was quieter than Jordan, but just as friendly. Seeing her rocked me in a way I hadn’t expected. She was young—my age or even younger—and she was a widow. There was a sadness that cloaked her and made her seem so much older, as though life had worn her down.

For the first time since I’d arrived, I watched as Dani’s lips curved into a blinding smile, her eyes lighting up at the sight of Easy, and then in three strides the crowd had parted and she had her arms around him, her tiny frame dwarfed by his.

He stiffened the instant she touched him, his eyes slamming closed, his arms at his sides. It took him a second, but we all watched as he slowly lifted his arms, his hands stroking her hair.

“Hey, Dani.”

My jaw dropped.

He said her name like it was the most beautiful thing in the world, as though it cut him up inside to say it, his voice husky and raw.

My gaze darted from Jordan to Eric, expecting to see the same confusion I felt, trying to figure out what I’d missed—

Jordan looked like she was about to cry. Eric looked worried.

What the hell?

They stood there like that for a moment, and then Dani let go, taking a step back, smiling up at him.

“I’ve missed you. How have you been?”

Easy swallowed, her presence seeming to have sucked the swagger out of him.

“I’m good. How are you? I didn’t realize you’d be here.” Guilt flashed in his eyes. “Sorry I wasn’t there when you flew in.”

Last week Eric and the rest of the squadron had gone and greeted Dani at the airport when her flight landed.

She smiled, reaching out and squeezing his hand. “Don’t worry about it. I heard you’d just gotten back from a TDY to Hill.”

Easy’s gaze drifted over her head to Jordan and then Eric, shooting daggers at both of them.

Was it just that she reminded him of the friend he’d lost? Did he share the same guilt that plagued Eric? Or was it something more?

They spoke for another minute, the whole room frozen by their encounter. Jordan tried to look like she was messing with the stuffing, but I could tell her attention was wholly focused on the conversation going on behind her. Eric hovered in the doorway, tense.

I shot him a look, my brows raised.

Easy and Dani finished talking and he grabbed a beer from the fridge before giving Eric a dark look and walking out. Eric grimaced and then turned, heading after him.

“How the fuck could you not tell me she was going to be here? What the hell were you thinking?”

I closed the door and stepped out onto the deck, facing off against a very pissed off Easy.

“You wouldn’t have come if I told you.”

“No, I wouldn’t have.”

“You’re being an asshole. She misses you. You were one of her closest friends, one of Joker’s closest friends. She asked where you were when we went to the airport. She looked for you.”

He let out an oath.

“You can’t avoid her forever.”

“Leave it alone.”

“No. I’m not going to leave it alone. I know you have your shit to work through, and I’m sorry, man, I really am, but you know what? She’s lost everything. She needs to have a support network around her right now, needs the people she considers her family to be there for her now that Joker’s gone. So whatever you’re dealing with, lock it down. She doesn’t need your drama.”

“You don’t think I fucking know that? Why do you think I’m keeping my distance?”

“Honestly? I don’t know what you’re thinking.”

“I love her. I’ve loved her since the first fucking moment I saw her. Everyone knows. Hell, it took your girlfriend,
what, a minute to figure it out? What I don’t need—and what Dani definitely doesn’t need—is for Dani to figure it out.

“I’m not abandoning her. If she needs me, I’ll be there. But I need some time to get this under control.”

“You’ve had seven months,” I answered. “She’s been gone for seven months.”

He gave me a twisted smile. “And there hasn’t been a day when I haven’t thought of her. When I walked into that kitchen and saw her . . .” He took a deep, ragged breath, raising the beer bottle to his lips. “You should have told me she was going to be here. Don’t blindside me like that again.”

I nodded, realizing how much I’d underestimated him. I’d never really seen this side of Easy before, had never been as close to him as Burn was. I’d known he was attracted to Dani, but I’d figured it was because Dani was gorgeous and funny, and because she was one of the kindest people I’d ever met. I’d never imagined it ran this deep, had expected out-of-sight, out-of-mind would have tempered the feelings inside Easy.

“Did the time . . . When you saw her . . .”

“Did the time apart help? Did it make this easier? Did I see her and think, ‘Oh, there’s Joker’s wife, glad that crush is over’?” he mocked.

I grimaced.

“What the fuck do you think?”