Incineration (Heart of Stone) (45 page)

His hips rocked against mine as his other hand settled at
the base of my back and the beat of the track took over our bodies. As we
progressed through the dance he slowly pulled me further into him as both hands
circled round my body. His eyes bore into mine, the desire evident in the
intensity as he slipped a hand over my ass and I heard a small groan leave his
lips.

Closing my eyes I tried to relax but he wasn’t doing it for
me; there was no spark, no desire and no heat and I was angry with myself; I
needed to get past Mason so I ordered myself to try and slid my hands around
him, placing them on his ass as our bodies ground into each other.

He gazed at me, his dark pupils boring into me and his lips
parted as his other hand slipped to my bottom and he clasped gently “God,
you’re so hot” he breathed in my ear as his lips tugged on my earlobe. I closed
my eyes “I’m not looking for a relationship” I said quietly in his ear.

He pulled back and looked at me, the desire still hot in his
eyes “Neither am I” he told me with a twinkle in his eye. I took a deep breath.
Did I want this? A one night stand, could I do the whole wham bam, thank you
ma’am?

I bit my bottom lip and shook my head regretfully “I can’t,
I’m sorry” I whispered and he smiled sadly “No, I didn’t think so” he said
softly and placed a gentle kiss on my lips then winked and walked away.

I chuckled softly and turned back to the table and froze as
I saw Mason stood leaning against the bar watching me. His expression was hard
and tight but his eyes were sad and empty and as he scanned my body they
darkened angrily before he raised them to my face again and held mine for a few
moments before I looked away and walked back to the table

“Wow, hot stuff” Marcy giggled and I laughed.

“Yeah, just not for you though Ava?” Sam said softly.

“You ready Ava?” Courtney asked and I nodded “I just need to
have a quick word with Brian and Brenda” I told her and she nodded as I made my
way over to them.

“I’m Erm…gonna get off” I said to Brian and his eyes flicked
over to Mason as he took an angry breath “Ava, I didn’t know he’d come with
her
”
he spat out the last word but I shook my head “Brian, I told you. Don’t blame
Mason, I did this to myself” he cocked his head sadly and then pulled me into a
hug “Take care Sweetheart. We’ll see you soon” I smiled and kissed his cheek
and hugged Brenda and as I turned I slammed straight into Mason. I jolted and
he grabbed my arm to steady me and Brenda and Brian scurried off.

“Ava” he said sternly “Are you ill?” the rumble of his voice
caused my breath to leave my lungs sharply. I didn’t answer him and his eyes
narrowed as he perused me “I asked if you are ill, you look like shit” he
snarled and I widened my eyes at his anger “Don’t Mason” I warned but he held
me tight “You’ve lost too much weight, although…” his eyes softened as they
skimmed over me and he placed his hand over my small tummy “This is new” he
breathed and I stilled.

His eyes shot to mine and then widened as he took in my
expression. He puffed out loudly and I whimpered and nibbled at the skin around
my fingernail “Ava…” he breathed but I shook my head angrily “No Mason. I can’t
do this now” I pleaded and the pain in his eyes matched my own. I pulled away
but he grabbed me again “Ava...is it mine?” he asked quietly but hesitantly “Of
course it’s yours” I snapped and he closed his eyes, in relief or pain I wasn’t
sure “Isn’t Rebecca waiting somewhere for you?” I hissed and pulled out of his
grasp.

Courtney was stood waiting patiently for me by the bar and I
could see the barman watching what was occurring between me and Mason. He
tipped his head and widened his eyes in query but I smiled and nodded to him
“I’m okay” I mouthed and he nodded and continued to pour drinks. “Ready Babe?”
Courtney asked and passed me my bag as she slipped her arm through mine “He’s
still watching you” she said quietly in my ear and I nodded but didn’t turn
around.

“I’m pregnant” I said happily “Oh my god princess” George
cried and I could see his huge toothy grin in my mind “Oh Sweetheart, I’m so
happy for you” I hugged myself at the happiness in him “You’re gonna be a
granddad” I whispered through the phone and he inhaled sharply “Oh Ava. I so
wish I was with you right now”

We were both silent for a few moments and I sensed the
question before he asked it “Does he know?” I sighed heavily “Yes” I breathed
and he didn’t push it any further.

We chatted for a while and I was still beaming an hour
later. The previous few days since the party I had been smiling to myself
constantly and I’m sure I looked like a nutter, grinning happily to myself.

 My only sadness had been the fact that Mason hadn’t been in
touch since the party and it broke my heart that he obviously either didn’t
believe it was his baby or he didn’t want anything to do with it.

I silently wondered what Kade was doing right now. I hoped
he had settled in and was living life and finding someone who deserved his
love. Kerrie had rang me a couple of weeks ago after he left to tell me that he
had gone and I knew by her soft tone that she grasped what had occurred but she
didn’t speak of it so neither did I.

She had convinced me to go to the spa with her and we were
due to leave Saturday morning. The chemotherapy had ripped her of her beautiful
hair but she refused a wig, saying she preferred the breeze on her scalp. I had
grown to love and admire her, her tenacious spirit was making her fight and she
was slowly but surely dragging herself through the torturous treatment.

“Well Miss Stone” the doctor beamed at me “I’m pleased to
confirm that you are in fact pregnant and you seem to be at about 10 weeks
gestation” I grinned back happily “so that should make it around…12
^th
June. I’m going to book you in for an urgent scan to check your dates as you
seem to have a little swell already and that’s unusual so early on but I want
to keep a close eye on you because of your previous loss”

She leaned forward and took my hand when she saw the
anxiousness on my face “Ava, I don’t want you to worry about things. Last time
was…well was not a great time but this time I know you are gonna be just fine”
she told me and I swallowed the lump in my throat “Thank you” I whispered and
she nodded “I would still like you to take things steady though, just to make
sure. How’s the sickness?” she asked and I grimaced “Awful. I can’t seem to
keep anything down and I’m so damn tired” she frowned “Is the father helping
out?” she asked and I looked away “We’re not…together” I told her and she
pursed her lips “Make sure you eat little and often, take plenty of fluids and
rest Ava, you need your sleep now. I’ll write you a prescription for some
anti-nausea drugs and some folic acid but well, congratulations” she smiled
softly again “Thank you”.

She rang the hospital and booked me in for an ultrasound on
Friday and I left laden down with leaflets, booklets and prescriptions.

I was slightly worried about her concern over my baby bump
and by Friday I was near a dithering wreck. I had brought Courtney with me and
the sonographer smiled at us “You ready to meet your baby mum” he smiled
politely and I grinned.

I lay back on the bed “Slightly cold I’m afraid” he said as
he squirted some gel on to my belly. Courtney held my hand as a grainy black
picture appeared on the little monitor. He swivelled the instrument over my
lower stomach and after hitting some keys on his keyboard he smiled “There we
are” he said and my breath hitched as my peanut appeared on the screen.

I fell in love instantly and Courtney squeezed my hand and
let out a sob.

My heart ached for Mason, I so wanted to share this moment
with him.

The technician frowned and moved the wand around my stomach
some more and pursed his lips “Oh” he breathed and I froze and looked at him,
my heart stuttering as he turned to look at me “and there’s baby number two” he
grinned with his eyebrows high “W..w.what?” I stuttered and snapped my eyes to
the monitor. Sure enough, side by side were my babies.

A sob of amazement left my throat and Courtney puffed out
and sat in the chair beside the bed. “I can confirm the gestation at 10 weeks
but this is why your doctor was concerned about your swell. It’s because
there’s two in there” he chuckled “would you like a picture?” he asked and I
nodded “Can I have two?” I asked and he smiled and nodded “Of course”.

“Wow” Courtney said for the twelfth time as we sat in a pub,
a soda and sandwich in front of me, well a near finished sandwich. I was
famished and now eyeing up Courtney’s sandwich. She caught me looking and
laughed and slid her plate over to me “Go for it”.

She looked at me with wide eyes “Wow Ava. You gonna be able
to manage two?” she asked slightly scared for me and I laughed “I’m sure I
will. They have a wonderful Aunty who is gonna help out” I winked and she
beamed “Oh hell yes. You now have a packet of peanuts” she squealed and I
chuckled and slid my fingers over the scan picture again.

My beautiful babies
.

The image of them side by side captured my heart, it was as
though they were already protecting each other, happy together side by side and
I ached for their Daddy.

Courtney caught my sad look “Is the other picture for
Mason?” she asked softly and I nodded “He is their father. Whether he wants to
be is up to him but I won’t stop his involvement even if he doesn’t want me” I
sighed “We can do this together Babe” she smiled happily and I loved her even
more.

I picked Kerrie up Saturday morning and she was really giddy
“I’m so looking forward to this Ava” she grinned “This week has been hell and
I’m ready for the pampering” she smiled. I noticed how pasty and tired she
looked and I was angry at myself for my own self-pity, I had nothing over what
Kerrie was going through. “I hope the masseurs are hot” she giggled and I
chuckled with her as we sped towards the health club.

I had to discreetly pull a therapist to one side and inform
her of my pregnancy in case I couldn’t have some treatments but the day was
superb, relaxing and therapeutic and we were both now sat in a little restaurant
we had spotted on the way back.

Taking a deep breath I pulled the scan picture from my bag
“Can you give Mason something from me” I asked quietly and I noticed the
sadness shroud her eyes. She smiled sadly and nodded and I passed her the
photo. Her eyes widened and she held her breath as she looked at it then her
face broke into a huge grin as she looked at me “Oh my god, I’m gonna be an
aunty to twins” she giggled and I grinned at her enthusiasm and nodded.

She suddenly wore a serious expression and grasped my hand
“He misses you Ava. He’s a mess” she revealed and I lowered my eyes “I hurt him
so much Kerrie. I destroyed him” I said sadly and I heard her sigh “I know Ava,
I know what happened” she divulged and my eyes shot to hers “I’m so sorry Kerrie”
I breathed as my eyes filled with tears “Hey, I said I know what happened I
didn’t say I was angry at you” she said sternly “No crying, too much stress for
my niece and nephew” she winked

“Is he…is he back with
her
?” I asked cautiously not
sure if I wanted to hear her answer and my heart dropped as she looked away and
didn’t answer me. I swallowed harshly but smiled sadly “I just want him to be
happy even if it’s not me that he wants” I said honestly and she cocked her
head “He may be back with the bitch from hell but it’s not her he wants Ava”.

I was settled on the sofa that night laughing at some stupid
reality programme on TV and surrounded by masses of sweet and chocolate
wrappers I had greedily scoffed. I was constantly hungry and had a dangerous
craving for all things sugary. A knock at the door grabbed my attention and my
eyes flicked to the time 11:45. Who the hell was visiting at this time?

Cautiously approaching the door I peeked through the
peephole. My heart stuttered as I saw Mason leaning his forehead against the
door and I managed to suck in some air as I opened the door slowly.

 He stood swaying slightly and I immediately realised he was
drunk and high.

He stood silently looking at me, his head tipped slightly to
the side and then he was suddenly all over me, his hands were in my hair,
tugging furiously as his mouth crashed over mine, bruising my lips in a
ferocious kiss.

He groaned on contact and pushed me against the wall as he
demanded entrance into my mouth with his tongue, his fists tightening on my
hair until the pain made me wince.

What the hell was this? This wasn’t love it was pure lust,
carnal and animalistic, and it broke my heart to realise that’s all he felt for
me!

I pushed him away but he was too strong and he was now
hurting me “Mason” I said but he was in his own zone “Mason” I cried louder as
his mouth left mine and he bit my neck savagely “You’re hurting me” I winced
when his hands yanked at my hair to pull my head back so he could get better
access to my neck. He growled angrily and tears welled in my eyes.

He dropped a hand and roughly grabbed my breast, squeezing
it callously and painful “Mason please” I sobbed and he suddenly gasped and
stepped back as though he was suddenly aware of what he was doing. His
expression was full of remorse and guilt

“Christ Ava, I’m so sorry” he breathed as his thumb brushed
over a sore spot on my neck and blood smeared it “God, what have I done?” he
shook his head in a panic. I stood paralysed to the spot as tears dripped down
my cheek.

His hands cupped my face as he rested his forehead against
mine “I’m so sorry Ava” he said, his voice full of painful regret.

He eventually pulled away and gazed at me “Kerrie gave me
the scan picture” he said softly and I nodded and he was silent again