In My Shoes (10 page)

He made a couple of sandwiches and poured
both of us a glass of milk. “Thank you,” I said.

“Sure.”

We ate our sandwiches in silence. As I
finished my lunch, I turned to him. “Okay, I think we still need to
cover makeup and hair today. Depending on how long that takes, we
should try to get some studying in before you have movie night with
my parents.”

“Can you be here for the movie night?” he
asked. “I’m not sure I’m ready to be alone, watching a movie for a
few hours with your parents.”

“No,” I replied, “I don’t think that’s a good
idea. If you invite me over, my parents will likely think we’re
dating.”

“You mean, you don’t know any guys who are
just friends?”

“I do, but I don’t have any guy friends who
are close enough to invite over to my house for movie night. I
almost never invite someone over for movie night. It’s kind of a
family thing.”

He looked pretty nervous. “Don’t worry,
you’ll do fine. During the movie, we don’t even talk. After the
movie is over, we will usually talk for a while about the movie,
and how our day was, whatever really. Just don’t go far off the
course. They’re not likely to ask you something you couldn’t answer
casually. Just try to remember you aren’t answering for a guy’s
take on things. I think you know me well enough now to know what
kind of things I
wouldn’t
say.”

“I don’t know,” he recanted, “I think I know
most of your habits pretty well from our crash course, but you’re
talking about being with your family. That’s seventeen years worth
of knowledge that I couldn’t possibly have gained in two days.”

“Yes, but they’re not going to be asking you
to recite my childhood history. Even if they bring up something
from my past, they will likely start it with ‘Do you remember the
time…’ and you’d just need to nod and let them speak. If you feel
you are in trouble, tell them you’re not feeling well, and you’d
like to go to bed.”

“I don’t even know the dynamics of your
family. I mean, I know who your parents are, and they both seem
nice, but I don’t know your mannerisms around them or
anything.”

“Okay, you will definitely mess this up if
you over think it.”

I probably shouldn’t have said that. He
seemed even more uncomfortable now.

“Look, I’m really close with both of my
parents, much like you seem to be with your mom. We don’t really
have a script. We usually sit on the couch together. Sometimes I
sit next to my mom, and sometimes I sit next to my dad. It wouldn’t
be uncommon for me to lie on my mom or dad’s shoulder while we
watch a movie.”

“Okay, I’m not lying on your dad’s
shoulder.”

“I know this is awkward,” I offered, “but you
are thinking like a guy right now, and not like me. That’s my
family. If you don’t act like they are
your
family, it will
be awkward.”

He stared off into space for a minute,
obviously considering the events that might take place tonight.
“Okay,” he said with defeat, “I’ll do my best.”

“Thank you. Now, let’s go try and pretty you
up.”

“You’re kidding right? I mean, you wake up
beautiful. I know, I’ve seen.”

“If you’re trying to butter me up,” I said as
I turned away from him, “it’s not going to get you a date when this
is all done.” I couldn’t help but smile as I walked up the stairs,
but I wasn’t going to let him see that.

“Now, I usually put on my makeup first, but
if I’m doing a more extravagant hairstyle, I will do the hair first
so I can cool off before I put the makeup on. Because everything is
likely to take you longer at first, you should probably do the hair
first and then the makeup.”

“Got it.”

“Okay, but since I’m here with you, we are
going to start with your makeup. There is one really important rule
to remember with makeup…less is more. If you look like you are
wearing makeup, you are doing something wrong.

“Before my mom would let me do anything with
makeup, she would have me go through magazines and point out people
who looked beautiful to me. We would also do this while we were out
at the mall, or wherever we might be. Then she pointed out that the
people we felt were most beautiful looked very natural. Not all of
them
were
natural, but they looked it.”

“So,” he said, “if you’re supposed to look
like you aren’t wearing makeup, then why even wear any makeup? I
mean, you don’t really need it.”

I rolled my eyes.

“No, really,” he said.

“I don’t know. I just feel more comfortable
with at least a little on.”

“So, even if a girl doesn’t need makeup, she
will wear it anyway? What sense does that make?”

“Well, I don’t know…I didn’t write the book
on this.” I thought for a second before continuing. “When I put on
makeup, my goal is to try and cover freckles and blemishes, and
highlight my strongest features. Personally, I’m not trying to look
like someone I’m not. I just…accentuate.

“It’s not all that bad,” I consoled. “Like I
said, I don’t wear a lot, and the hardest part for you will be
doing your eyes. Just try not to poke one of…well,
my
eyes
out.”

“I’ll do my best,” he said,
half-heartedly.

I showed him how to put on moisturizer and
then pulled out the concealer.

“This is concealer,” I said.

“What is concealer, other than something that
conceals?”

“That’s exactly what it is. Concealer is used
to cover blemishes. I match it to my skin tone.”

“Yeah, I see that.”

“You get a little concealer on the tip of the
wand and lightly dab it over imperfections.”

“What imperfections?” he asked.

“Come on.”

“What?” he asked. “You are going to have to
point to these imperfections, because I don’t know what you are
talking about.”

“Okay, right there. You see that freckle
there, and those there?”

“Yeah.”

“Those are imperfections.”

“Those are freckles, not imperfections.”

“Okay, you are being difficult. You may not
agree, but I need you to just do this.”

“Alright. I’m not trying to be difficult, it
just doesn’t make sense to me. But if you want me to, I’ll do it.
So, I dab it over the…
imperfections
. Like this?”

“Yes. And then you blend it in…like…this,” I
said, showing him.

“Got it.”

“Now, you can also use this to cover pimples.
But, I treat the pimples at night with clear pimple medicine. After
I shower, I make sure all of my makeup is off. You never want to
sleep with makeup on. It’s not good for your skin.”

“You might have wanted to mention that
yesterday.”

“I can’t remember everything. There was a lot
going on yesterday. I thought I did pretty good with the basics
yesterday, and you did take a shower last night, right?”

“Right.”

“Well, most of it will come off when you wash
your face in the shower. The hardest part is getting the mascara
off of your eyes.

“Anyway,” I continued, “next is eye shadow.
Unless you are going to an 80’s band concert, or maybe a costume
party, your eye shadow should be a natural color.”

I showed Jake how to apply eye shadow primer,
then eye shadow.

“Like this?” he said as he applied his first
swipe.

“Yes and no. Here, let me do your other
eyelid, and then you try and repeat what I do.”

I applied the shadow to…well, my left eye as
he watched. “See, you want to make smooth glides. It will get
easier and more natural the more you do it.”

“Great,” he said with a healthy dose of
sarcasm. He finished applying the other eye. “How’s that?”

“Not too bad for your first time. Like I
said, it takes practice. Now, eyeliner and mascara and you’re
done!”

“Good,” he said with relief.

I showed Jake how to apply eyeliner pencil,
and emphasized drawing along the top edge where the upper lashes
met the lid. I had to tell him twice to start where the lashes
started, because he wanted to draw all of the way from the inside
corner.

“I’m trying my best,” he said with
frustration.

“I know you are. You seem to think it’s a bad
thing that you can’t do makeup perfect the first time. You
are
a guy.”

“I know, but I still want to do it
right.”

“Good, because that’s my face,” I said trying
to make him smile. He did.

“Okay, we are down to the mascara. I’ll do
one eye, and you try the other.”

I showed him how to load the mascara wand,
without pumping air into it, and I applied the mascara to…my left
eye. Then I had him try the right eye.

“Ouch!”

“Now I told you to be careful. You can’t get
that close or you’ll poke your eye.”

“No kidding. It’s not like I meant to. How am
I supposed to get to the base of the lid without getting my
eye?”

“It really just takes practice.”

He tried a few times. Each time, I would
remove mascara so he could try again. After the third time, he was
starting to get the hang of it. A little.

“Like this?” he asked.

“Sort of. Try to make it even across the
lashes. You can use a sideways motion to separate the lashes. Don’t
keep putting a bunch of coats on. You want to put one even coat on,
let it dry and do another. Try not to do more than that or it will
look all clumpy.”

“Too much. I can’t keep it all straight.”

I could tell his patience was wearing thin. I
realized I was trying to teach him everything I had learned over
the last several years, in one day.

“Sorry. You know, that’s good enough for now.
Just…try and practice on your own later. Maybe you’ll be more
comfortable without an audience.”

“Thank you. Is there anything else I need to
do before we stop?”

“Lip gloss, and that’s it.”

“You don’t use lipstick?”

“No, most teenagers don’t use lipstick. Well,
at least I don’t. I use lip gloss, and my girlfriends use lip
gloss.”

I handed Jake my lip gloss and told him how
to apply it. He followed my instructions and turned to look at me.
“So, how did I do?”

“Well, you are definitely ready for the
circus.” He looked like he wanted to throw something at me.
Hard.

“I’m teasing. It’s really not bad for your
first time, but it’s not good enough to leave the house, either.
And, it’s not really good enough for in the house, actually.”

“Gee, thanks,” he said with a little
frustration, and a little smile. He wanted to do it right, but I
think he also saw the humor.

“I’m not trying to be mean.”

“Ready for the circus isn’t mean?” he asked
stiffly.

“You really did do well for your first time.
It’s just, well, my first time was a few years ago. I’ve done it
every day since then. It won’t take you long to get it. Let’s clean
it off and I’ll redo your makeup real quick. Then, I’ll touch it up
and we’ll do your hair.”

“Okay,” he said. I could tell he was
determined to get it right. I recognized the expression, but it
looked different than when I make it.

“Really, you did fine. There’s a lot to
learn.”

“I know,” he said, “but it just seems that
you are able to deal with this transition so easily, and I’m having
a hard time.”

“That’s because you are looking at it wrong.
You are trying to compare how well you do things to how well I do
them now. It took lots of practice. On the other hand, you don’t
really do much that I haven’t done before. I mean, I know how to do
hair and shave and wear clothes. Let’s face it, guys are simple and
girls are complex.”

“Try, guys are practical,” he said
defensively.

“Are you saying I’m not practical?” I asked,
also defensively.

“Well, if you’re going to stereotype…girls
are generally less practical than guys.”

“How did you come up with that delusion?” I
asked, my voice slightly raised.

“Look,” he said, “I’m not trying to start an
argument. You are smart and funny and pretty…and I could go on.
But, look at your room and your closet. You are seventeen and you
have a ton of clothes. Different shoes, different skirts, different
bras. I have less than half of the clothes you have, and two pairs
of shoes.”

“Like I said, simple.”

“You get all bent out of shape because I said
guys are more practical, but you started out calling me
simple.”

I let out a sigh. “Valid point. Shall we do
your hair?”

“Yes, please!” he said, pointedly. “It feels
like we’ve been doing this forever. I’m feeling overloaded.”

“I know, but once you get familiar with
everything, it will go much faster.

“So,” I continued, “it seems as though you
did pretty well with your ponytail this morning. Now remember that
you don’t want to do ponytails too often. I usually save them for
days when I am going to be active. A ponytail is easy, fast and
takes the least amount of hardware. We usually have an activity in
P.E. about twice a week where we have to dress out. I will save the
ponytails for those days. After P.E., I will shower and fix the
ponytail.”

We both stared at each other for a moment, as
if we both had the same thought at the same time.

“Oh no! You’re going to have to shower in the
girls’ locker room. That’s not good.”

“That should be…interesting,” he said,
smiling. “Don’t worry, I can handle it.”

“Yeah, I’m not really worried about you. I’m
worried about all of the other girls, especially friends of mine,
who you are going to be taking a shower with. Wait, do you have
P.E.?”

He smiled. It was my smile, but I didn’t
really recognize it. “Yeah, I do. This isn’t sounding so bad now,
is it?”

“Yeah, actually it is. It just seems a
little…intrusive to be in a locker room with a bunch of naked guys
from our school. They deserve their privacy.”

“Well, they’re not going to know as long as
you don’t act like a girl…and you need to be sure you don’t act
like a girl. I don’t need that kind of a reputation in the locker
room.”