Authors: Jennifer Loiske
The other men were whispering among themselves in evident confusion, and Matt had stopped in his tracks. What did this mean? Would Marie truly be allowed to decide Mathanan’s fate, or was Gunward merely toying with the girl? Might Marie’s decision be harsher than Gunward’s? Marie looked at Matt and chewed on her fingernails. What in the name of sanity would she come up with, to save Matt? Gunward’s decision had been fully justified and Marie seemed unable to find a way to alter it as to both punish and spare Matt. When it came right down to it, Matt had done very wrong and she might even have died. Marie racked her brain feverishly. The minutes seemed to pass very quickly. Gunward had turned his dangerous, golden brown eyes to Tiamhaidh and Marie sensed their agitated dispute. Finally she smiled.
“I will stand by Gunward’s decision. But I will alter it this way: Matt may not join any shape shifter pack until Gunward gives him permission. Matt may also not change shape; he must stay in human form until Gunward permits him to change. Gunward, for his part, must not prolong the sentence. As soon as he deems Matt has suffered his punishment, Gunward must lift the restrictions and free Matt. Will that do?” Marie asked, smiling.
“It will do,” Gunward spoke firmly. “But remember that I will decide when the time is right.”
“Done,” Marie intoned.
“Done,” Gunward affirmed.
“What is done?” the men wondered.
“Mathanan, move your cursed bones this way!” Tiamhaidh shouted. “Marie just set you free! Didn’t you hear?”
Matt moved closer to the pack, confused. The other men seemed equally confused.
“Matt, you have permission to remain with us for as long as we stay in our human forms. Don’t you see? Marie inveigled you back into the fold. We’re not a pack of shape shifter wolves when we’re human. You can come back. So long as you remember you can’t shift until Gunward gives you permission.”
Somewhat wary, Matt walked to Marie. He still didn’t quite understand what had happened, but he trusted Tiam’s word. He quickly hugged Marie and slunk silently into the house. Gavin and Daniel burst into laughter and the other men hesitantly joined in. No one quite knew whether Matt had been punished or not, whether they would still be punished, or whether the situation had already been dealt with.
Eventually they all relaxed and went off on their own errands. Marie and Tiamhaidh took their farewells of the others and were able to go home to Sofia and David. When Marie looked into the rear mirror of the car, she saw Gunward looking sadly after them. Marie would have pitied the man had she not known he didn’t want pity. The only thing he wanted was her mother, and Marie was not ready to give her mother up. Mother would have the devil of a time explaining the situation to her, though. She sighed and moved her gaze back to the road. Tiamhaidh glanced at the girl and took her hand firmly in his. Whatever would happen, the two of them would make it through, as long as they could be together.
How easily our life changed. Marie’s life was almost back to normal. The only exception was that Tiamhaidh was practically living with us these days. No one called him Timothy any longer. That time was over. He no longer had to pretend to be more human than wolf. We all accepted him into our family unconditionally, though David with much more reluctance than the rest of us. David couldn’t stand a young man in his twenties staying with us daily, and Marie clearly couldn’t stand to be separated from him even for a moment. Even David noticed the exceptional bond between those two young people, and my heart rejoiced. Tiam seemed always present. His blue eyes followed Marie’s every move with rapture and Marie downright worshiped him. They communicated by thought and I noticed it often irritated the rest of my family, as the others had been completely shut out of their world. I, too, made an effort to close them off my mind, as it would have been rude to search their minds. At times I noticed Marie’s eyes laughing at Tiam or a small lopsided smile gracing Tiam’s lips. They might just sit on the terrace steps, staring into each other’s eyes, fingers laced together. Marie was truly happy. It was so beautiful, my heart reveled in each moment they shared. They were completely bonded. Marie spent hours walking in the woods with Tiam and only I knew Tiam didn’t walk on two legs at those times.
How painlessly Marie had accepted that I, too, was different. Without any mutiny or any anger over the fact that I’d kept my family in the dark for so many years and concealed my own talents, she accepted me. I knew, of course, that she shared Tiamhaidh’s mind and also saw me from his point of view, but I’d still have expected some kind of a rebellion from my temperamental daughter. I had been subjected to a grueling cross-examination upon Marie’s return home, but Tiam’s proximity seemed to have disordered Marie’s wits so thoroughly that she found it impossible to focus on being angry with me. I sometimes found my own thoughts drifting into Tiam’s blue eyes and the small brown dots encircling his irises. They were so tiny they could only be seen if one looked him in the eyes up close. Tiamhaidh’s thoughts laughed and I found it difficult to concentrate on Marie when Tiam projected to me images of him and Marie together.
Tiam’s room was next to Marie’s, but the rooms were connected by large doors between them. Tiam's room hadn't really been designed as a bedroom and it was small enough to be called a closet. However, Tiamhaidh hadn't hesitated in choosing the tiny closet rather than our spacious guest house. The closet was near Marie; the guest house was not. We had put a comfortable queen-size bed into the closet and it filled the room so that there was hardly any space to move. But Tiamhaidh voiced not a word of complaint. He just enjoyed being part of our family. It had been David’s uncompromising demand that the youngsters wouldn’t yet share a bed and I had agreed. However, I couldn’t conceal from Tiamhaidh and Marie that I knew of Tiam’s nocturnal visits to Marie’s room. I also knew that nothing untoward had happened between them. They only slept, cuddled, together. A small part of my awareness, constantly on alert for Marie’s sake, got some respite when Tiam wrapped his arms around Marie and she fell contentedly asleep in his embrace. Marie couldn’t have been safer.
So, things seemed to be slowly sorting out. Summer had gone in a glimpse and it was almost the end of it when the school term had begun. Two months, I thought, how unbelievably quickly the time had gone, and I'd done nothing. The hot August weather was still more like summer than autumn Tiam took Marie to school every day and then went to the gym or trained in Gaeshido. David was still often away and I took care of our home. He finally seemed to believe that my life with Gunward was over and that we two might still find the love that had existed between us. My only worry was Clarissa. At first I had thought her silence was due to her jealousy of Marie and Tiam’s love, but as days passed that thought felt ridiculous. Clarissa treated Tiam as a family member. Tiam was subject to her admiration as well as her bouts of irritation, and Tiam for his part treated her as his little sister. They both appeared to hold great affection for one another. However, Clarissa became more and more quiet and evaded my eyes. Often I woke up at night to her screaming and when I went to her, I felt how she shook with fright and how clammy her skin was. I would hold her and stroke her hair, but even though this occurred almost every night, she wouldn’t tell me what the matter was with her. She spent her days at home and whenever she needed to go somewhere she would ask for a lift. Nothing could make her go out walking alone and even going out to the garden seemed difficult for her. Finally I had enough and asked Tiam to dedicate one day to Clarissa.
The following morning I set out to train Bruun and Flow long before Clarissa woke up. Thus Clarissa was left with no choice but to accept Tiam’s offer of a lift and agree to let him take care of her for the day, or to stay home. Having raged at Marie for a while, Clarissa got into Tiam’s silvery convertible Mercedes and let him drive her to school, her face twisted into an expression of anger. Marie was pleased enough to stay home and she’d even agreed to vacuum the floors and wash the windows.
I returned home well ahead of Clarissa and Tiam. I enjoyed spending a moment alone with Marie, having a cup of tea together and chatting without the others puttering around us. Ever since Tiam had moved in with us, he’d been wherever Marie was, and a private conversation with Marie had been an impossibility. Now, though, Marie was sitting opposite me, her dark curls tied into a ponytail, her face slightly flushed, and her hands encased in large, yellow dish gloves. Her eyes shone with love when she talked about Tiam. She asked me questions about shape shifting and life as a wolf and I did my best to answer her as honestly as possible. Marie hadn’t even dreamt of finding this kind of love. Boys her own age had avoided her because of her illness, and girls didn’t want her company either, because any boy near Marie would only stare at her exotic beauty. We’d never been able to fathom where Marie had inherited her looks from, as David was a Scandinavian kind of blond, and my coloring was different shades of gold. Marie was like a gypsy princess with dark curls and smoldering eyes.
Now that Marie had found Tiam, other girls wanted nothing to do with her. Jealousy and malice were evident in their speech and they would have done anything for Tiam to look at them the way he looked at Marie. If Marie turned her back for even a moment, the other girls would flock around Tiam to drool over him. Tiam was mostly amused by this. None of the other girls came even close to being a match for Marie. Marie was the only one for him and he had no interest in any other. But the others failed to understand this. To them it was unbelievable that Tiam could be interested in Marie, who was ill and seemed strange and solitary to them. They were ready to stick a knife into her back whenever they might. However, Tiam’s stern look and his presence prevented them from taunting Marie. They’d have sold their souls for a chance to touch Tiam’s impressive, trained body and for one interested look from him. For Marie, however, it was enough that she had one true friend. Emma had stood by her ever since she’d fallen ill and irked though she might be that Marie wasn’t spending as much of her free time with her as she’d used to, Emma was genuinely happy for Marie and Tiam.
Marie and Tiam would often take Emma along on their night walks. Emma seemed unfazed by the wolfishness of Tiam and the other young males. I’d never asked, but I was certain Marie had told Emma about the shape shifters. Marie had never been capable of lying and Emma was so important to her that she wasn’t about to start lying now. Emma was a petite girl, always cheerful. Marie and Emma were physically very unlike each other and it was rather amusing to see them walk side by side, as Marie was at least half a head taller and her walk was rather more like a dance, whereas Emma strode like a boy. Not that she was boyish as such, but despite having long tawny hair and wearing makeup, Emma was incapable of feminine movements whereas to Marie it came naturally. Emma loved sports, any kind of sport, and Marie couldn’t stand sports, except for dancing, which she didn't count as a sport. I had always wondered how these two very different sorts of girls had found each other and remained fast friends all these years.
I had already made a second pot of tea and we had destroyed two packets of chocolate cookies between us when Clarissa and Tiamhaidh returned. Laughter swiftly died on my lips when I saw Tiam’s expression. Flashing a quick smile at Clarissa, I urged her to join us and said I’d go to the loo. Tiam came after me and wrapped me into his arms.
“He’ll never give up, will he?” I whispered.
“No. He’s been following Clarissa for a long time. Only Gunward is stopping him from taking her.”
“But why? What’s so special about Clarissa? She’s very beautiful, yes, but he has a line of gorgeous girls waiting at his door,” I said with exasperation.
“She’s your daughter. That’s enough for him.”
“Oh, God! What do we do?” I said, clinging more tightly to Tiam. He soothed me in his arms, as if I were a frightened child.
“I can’t let him take Clarissa. He’s already made her sick with fear. It’s a good thing she doesn’t know how dangerous he can be and how closely he’s been following her.”
“Oh, God! He’s even been able to infiltrate Clarissa’s dreams! How has he kept this from Gunward? This shouldn’t be possible!” I exclaimed, terrified.
“All sorts of things have happened during these weeks that ought not to be possible. But I agree with you about Gunward. An alpha should always know what the beta is thinking. It’s absolutely impossible for a beta to conceal things from the alpha!”
“Evidently it isn’t,” I snapped in frustration.
He stood right next to each other in silence, both of us immersed in our own thoughts, figuring out ways to sort this out. At last we knew what had been bothering Clarissa. A black wolf had been following her for a long time, stalking and preying. Even when they’d been in the car, Tiam had sensed the wolf running along the edge of the forest, following Clarissa. She couldn’t even look out of the window without feeling the wolf’s eyes upon her. Adam was as brash a wolf as he was as a human, and that scared me. Clarissa had no chance of surviving. She could hardly remain indoors for the rest of her life and we wouldn’t be able to protect her at all times.
“The elders keep talking of how special and important you are. Do you have some talents I’m not aware of?” Tiamhaidh asked, breaking the silence that had felt like forever.
“No! I’m not special. It’s true I can influence minds. Human minds! Or block other wolves out of my mind, but Adam is not in my mind! You’re the fighter here!”
Shaking, I desperately tried to fight the panic that clung to my mind tighter and tighter by the second. Tiam gently stroked my hair. But nothing could calm me down enough. I knew exactly how dangerous Adam was and I feared we wouldn't be able to defend Clarissa should Adam decide to invade our home and just take her.