I'm Holding On (22 page)

Brynlee

“Um, what do you mean?”

“I could work for you some until you can afford to hire someone else.”

I shake my head briskly. “No, you can’t do that. You do enough, and you have to run the shop.”

“I can spare a
few hours here and there. Besides, I’ll take time with you any chance I get.”

“I can’t let y
ou do that, Drew, and I should be calling you sweetheart. You’re thoughtful.” I wrap my arms around his neck and press my lips to his, smelling his clean scent and tasting chocolate on his mouth from his coffee. He’s always liked the sugary ones.

“Um, let’s
get a few of these books and go to the park. I can make out with you better there,” he says before he kisses my temple. I feel him smile against it, and it warms me from the inside out. Drew is safe and comforting but still gets my pulse going.

He insists on buying my books and assures me that I’ll be repaying him in baked good
s and kisses. We grab our usual deli sandwiches and drive to the park.

He spreads the blanket out, but instead of si
tting across, I sit next to him under the tree and rest my head against his shoulder while we eat.

“You so need a pair of those slick shorts, Drew.” I point to a male runner with long, skinny legs. He’s wearing the shortest pair of silky shorts.

“I’ll buy you some tomorrow, and I’ll come with you when you wear them, except I’ll run about a quarter mile ahead of you,” I say, giggling.

In a matter of seconds, I’m flat on my back, and Drew’s on top of me. “Get that damn image out of your head right now, young lady.”

“No, it’s a pretty funny picture. I’ll get you lime green instead of the bright orange pair he’s wearing. Oh, and let’s not forget the matching headband.”

Drew begins tickling my waist with one hand while he holds himself up with the other. I squirm and squirm, trying to get out from under him, but he’s not budging.

“Stop raking your pelvis against me, and I’ll let you go,” he says, now looking frustrated.

I stop moving
. His heated eyes stare back at me, but I sense his mind is only focused on the body lying underneath him.

“God, I want you, Brynlee.”

I hold my finger up by my shoulder and point downward, looking toward his shorts.

“You might want to get that under control before you put on those sexy shorts. I don’t think it’ll fit in them when
it’s at attention.” I laugh hard, already unable to breathe, but it becomes even more difficult when he tickles me again.

“Y
ou are in a world of trouble, and stop picturing me in those damn shorts.”

“Hey there, are you OK miss?”

I hear the voice and look over. The man in the bright orange shorts is standing only twenty feet or so from us. Drew looks up but swiftly looks back at me with wide eyes.

“Yes. I’m with him.” I fold my lips in and concentrate hard on not laughing.

“OK, I wanted to be sure he wasn’t hurting you there. Sorry to interrupt.”

Dr
ew’s eyes never leave mine, and I know it’s because he’ll laugh.

“
Thank you. You’re a kind man to risk your own safety to check on me.” I bat my eyelashes at him, getting myself into more trouble with Drew.

“I like the color of your shorts. It’s smart out here. The bikers ride kinda crazy. At least this way they won’t run you over.”

“I know, right?” he asks. He has his hands on his hips and is walking in a circle, still breathless from his run.

“Well, thanks again.” I bat my lashes a few more times for dramatic effect.

“No problem. I’ll leave you two alone now.” He takes off running, and I burst into a fit of laughter.

Drew’s
cackling on top of me, so we’re basically bouncing on the blanket, and it’s starting to feel like we’re doing something inappropriate. I’m sure we look like it, too.

“I can’t
believe you had the nerve to do that. Where did this bold side of you come from?”

“I don’t know.” Yes
I do. Ian brought it out of me. Well, and Drew, too, but more so Ian.

“And you were flirting with the man. Are you goi
ng to make me compete with Mr. Silky Pants, too?”

“Those are
not pants,” I say, pointing my finger in Drew’s face. “They are barely shorts, but if you wear the green ones for me, I won’t feel a need to check his out.”

Drew climbs off of me and reaches out his hand for me to take. “Come on. I’m taking you home where I can punish you properly.”
His lips are pursed and his eyebrows are lifted.

I begin snickering
.

He huffs and puts his hands on his hips.

“What’s so funny now?”

“You. I can see you trying to discipline
your children with that same look on your face, right before they stomp all over you. You’re going to be such a softy.”

He shakes his head at me like he
can’t believe what I just said. “Are you enjoying dishing out all this harassment? And what has you thinking about kids, anyway?”

I take his hand and let him pull me up. He embrace
s me and appears a little alarmed.

“Tell me.”

“I don’t know. I just pictured it when you said that about punishing me.”

“Did you talk to Ian about kids?”

Shit. How did we end up here?

“Um, we did have a conversation about it, but I wasn’t trying to do that with you. Kids get punished, so that’s what I pictured when you said it. You’re really kind, so I don’t envision you being hard on your kids. It was a compliment.”

“We can talk on the way back to your place,” he says smiling. Thank goodness. After getting in the car, he wastes no time bringing it up again.

“
Are you wondering if I want kids?” he asks.

“I believed so
since you’re close to your family, but I guess I shouldn’t have assumed.”

“I do want children. Do you?”

“Yes, I really do. Growing up alone sucked, so I want more than one so they have siblings.”

“
Does Ian want kids?”

“Yep.” I look out the window. I don’t want to get more into that.

“He keeps surprising me. I never thought he’d want children. You’ll be a great mother, Bryn. You’re thoughtful, loving and hard working. They’ll always have your attention.”

I reach over and tak
e his hand. It’s warm like him.

“Thank you, Drew.”
He pulls up in front of my apartment but leaves the vehicle running. “What are you doing?”

“I’m dropping you off.”

“I knew you were a softy. See, you can’t even punish me. How will you ever discipline your kids?” I ask, smirking.

“Oh, I’m not finished with you. I’m going to make you wait for it. Get dressed up. I’ll be back at six.”

His hand slides along my neck, and he tugs me closer, kissing my mouth.” Go before I change my mind and come in.”

“
OK, see ya soon you big softy.”

Drew

I feel like the wind’s been knocked out of me when Bryn opens the door.
Her beauty takes my breath away.

“You look stunning
.”

“Thanks,” she says bashful
ly, glancing at her dress. It’s pale pink and strapless. There are three pearl buttons going down the center of the chest, and it gathers at her waist, showing how tiny it is. It looks like cotton and ends above her knees.

Her hair is up
, exposing her neck, and she’s wearing high heels. Damn, she looks sensuous, and I don’t want any other man seeing her like this. I put my arm out, and she loops hers around it.

“You look really handsome.
You’re attractive no matter what you’re wearing, but this is a nice look on you. Where are we going?” she asks as I open the door for her.

“It’s a surprise.”
I park at Brasserie Montmartre, a French inspired restaurant downtown. It’s not the most expensive place in Portland but one I thought Bryn would appreciate. “I can’t take you to France, so this is my best move. It’s all I got,” I say, winking at her.

“I’m really excited. I’ve been wanting to eat here. They’re known for their pomme
s frites.”

“French fries, right?”

“Yes.”

We’re seated, and Brynlee studies the menu.

“I want the three course meal with the mixed greens, meatloaf, and maple crème brûlée for dessert.”

I chuckle.
“You figured that out fast.”

“I’m hungry.”

She hasn’t been eating enough. It’s worth a hundred dollars to see Brynlee actually consume a whole meal.

“
You’re always too busy to stop and eat.”

“If yo
u don’t want to hear the dirty ‘B’ word, then cut it out. You’re worrying about me too much.”

“Boyfriends worry abou
t their girlfriends. Think of that ‘B’ word instead.” I have to frown. Maybe I am too nice like Marissa said.

“I was joking
, Drew, but I don’t want you worrying. I’ve been taking care of myself for years.”

“But everyone needs help sometimes.”

“I already let you help me more than I’m comfortable with. You’re trying to show me that I’m tired and sickly and need you to work for me. Stop it.”

I hold my hands up in surrender.

“Alright, alright, but I don’t think you’re sickly. I believe you’re stunning.” I reach across the table and take her hand. She’s a real life brunette Barbie tonight.

I remember Marissa playing with those dolls, and the real one is sitting across from me. This is pathetic. I’m like a hormonal fourteen year old.

Brynlee

Drew’s holding my hand, and the lighting in the room is only magnifying how sexy his face is from his sparkling, blue eyes to his charming dimpled smile.

His dark khakis fit him perfectly, and his light blue and white, pinstripe dress shirt is formed to his muscles, showing his chest and biceps.

I don’t know how he could look a
ny better than he does tonight, and I wish I knew what he’s thinking. He’s gazing at me as if it’s the first time he’s seeing me.

We
get our meal and it’s excellent.

“Um, I’ve been doing some thinking about what I want in the future as far as my career goes,” I say.

“I thought you had that all figured out?”

“Well,
one thing you’re concerned about, I do agree with. I’m too young to have my back hurting already. The creative aspect of my job is my favorite part, not the baking. I’ve been considering teaching it instead.”

His eyes light up even brighter.

“I think that’s a terrific idea. You’d make a phenomenal teacher. You’re patient and thorough, and you’re always creating new desserts of your own.”

“You’re full of the compliments tonight.”

“I mean it, Bryn. I think it would be a lot less stress and responsibility, too.”

“I agree. I thought
I could start with a job teaching at the college and maybe open a bakery in the future to instruct. I’d like to focus on foreign cuisine and go to Europe for a couple of weeks to take some classes before I begin working.”

Drew blinks quickly se
veral times as if he’s very surprised.

“I would pay for it
, of course, with some of the money I’ve been saving for a bakery. It would be a once in a lifetime experience and give me more knowledge. I think classes in France and Italy would be a selling point to get a job, too.”

“Sugar, I think that’s a perfect idea, and if anyone can make it ha
ppen, it’s you. I know how badly you’ve wanted to go to Europe, too.”

I grin at him, happy that he thinks it could work. He has a business degree and manages a coffee shop, so I think he’d know if I was way off base.

“Your opinion really matters to me, so I’m glad you think it’s possible.”

“Your clients will be disappointed.”

“Yes, but they’ll be helpful references to find a job. I’ll still bake for you if possible.”

“Let’s worry about that when the time comes, and how soon were you thinking?”

“I was going to apply at the school soon.” I look away from him. It’s awkward to talk about kids before I’m even married, but it’s another reason I want to make this big change in my career.

“Also, I
thought it would be better to work for someone else if I’m going to have children. It’ll be easier to take days off when I need to, and I’ll have more time for them. It’s a heavy weight to carry every day, knowing that if I have to be off work, I don’t get paid. It’s scary.”

“I worry about it, too. You’ve really thought this through.”

“Honestly, this situation with you and Ian is what made me think about it. I’ve been forced to look closer at what I want.”

“
I guess all three of us have had to do that, but I’ve always known I want you in my future.” He stares at me again, and I watch his eyes go from mine to my lips. I can’t help but wet them.

“Are
you finished with your crème brûlée?” he asks.

“Yes, thank you very much. Dinner was lovely.”

We’re both quiet on the way to my apartment. It’s probably because we feel the onslaught of lust coursing through us and don’t know what we’re going to do with it … what we can do with it.