Ignite (13 page)

“No, I just mean it’s ironically fitting.”

“I thought so too,” I said, snuggling into the cushions. I wish I had brought a blanket and I shivered. I didn’t want to get up and go find one though.

As if on cue, Dean flipped a blanket I hadn’t noticed before down off the top of the couch. He spread it out and handed it to me.

“What about you?” I asked, feeling bad that he was always taking care of me.

He shook his head.

“I’m good.”

I pulled the throw to my side, but I couldn’t concentrate on the movie any longer because I realized how stupid I felt. Here I was, with the guy who had just saved my life, watching
Sleeping Beauty
. This wasn’t real life. Dean Powell would not be sitting here watching a movie with me when he could be out doing whatever Dean Powell likes to do.

I’m not sure whether the medicine kicked back in, or if my brain just decided it needed more time out. Halfway through the movie, I found myself fidgeting around with the blanket. I knew he was watching me, but I stretched out so I could lie down.

“Come here,” he said softly, holding out his arm.

“What?” I whispered, knowing there was no way I’d heard that right.

He grabbed my hand and gave it a light tug.

Whatever possessed me to do it, I don’t know. I felt like I was still under the anesthesia. Somehow I ended up lying across the couch with my head leaning against him, and his arm was around me. I felt so much warmer.

I was going to soak up every second of it, because there was no way this was real life.

I woke up to a loud crash.

Dean was on his feet in an instant, and I was left tangled in the blanket.

“Sorry guys, I dropped a glass.”

“No worries, Callie,” Dean said, rubbing his face sleepily.

Coming from her, she probably did it on purpose.

Dean glanced at his watch.

“I should probably get going.”

I nodded and shucked the blanket.

“I’ll lock the door,” he said softly. The shadows playing across his face and those blue eyes in the dark exacerbated my speechlessness. I wasn’t used to boys leaving my house in the middle of the night, or being there at all.

“Okay,” was all I could manage as we walked down the hallway. I stopped at the guest room door and turned on the light. It was if he wasn’t sure what to do either, but it was clear we should do something.

After a moment of consideration, he finally pulled me in for a short hug.

Friends hug, right?

“Night Lauren,” he whispered into my hair.

“Night Dean,” I replied, not wanting him to leave.

But he did. He pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to me, and then left without another word. It was my phone. I heard the lock turn, and then the door shut.

I was about to shut my own door when Callie walked by and glared at me.

Yep, she had definitely done it on purpose.

I put my phone on the dresser and got in bed.

Just as I was falling asleep, it buzzed and teetered on the edge of falling off. I grabbed it and looked at the screen, squinting in the dark. There was a text from Dean. When had we even exchanged phone numbers? There wasn’t a last name, but I didn’t know anyone else named Dean.

A KNOCK AT my door woke me.

“Rise and shine,” Dean said as he came in. The light from outside came with him, and I held up my hand as if it would block it all off. Why was he back to wake me up? I wasn’t going to complain, though. Going to sleep and waking up to Dean Powell was something I could get used to.

Even if he left in the middle.

He set a coffee mug on the dresser next to me and sat on the end of the bed.

“So, I forgot to tell you last night,” he said simply.

I turned over to look at him as I ran my fingers through my hair. He was dressed to the nines in a black suit.

Holy shit.

I sat up and looked at him, trying to make sense of the situation. My hair was everywhere.

“Why are you all dressed up?”

He gave me a look.

Somehow, I knew exactly what was going on through that alone. I pulled the blankets back down over me and shoved them over my head.

“No,” I groaned, drawing out the word.

“Yes,” he said, lightly tugging the sheets down. “I’ll go wake the kids up. Kenzie said she left a dress for you in the hallway closet.”

Did they always think of everything?

“Thanks,” I muttered, and threw myself out of bed as soon as he left the room. Why did none of that feel strange? It was like we’d been arguing about waking up to go to things for years.

Weird.

I chugged my expertly made coffee and hurried to get ready.

Apparently, they’d postponed Linda’s memorial service so I could participate. For some unknown reason they were calling it a memorial service instead of a funeral, as if that made the subject matter any lighter. Someone was still dead, why not call it what it was? Jed and Mary said it was so family could come from out of town, but as far as I could tell, no one had come from too far away. All of Linda’s friends and family were from neighboring towns.

So really, I felt like they’d done it so I would have to be there.

I knew that sounded awful, but I didn’t even know her! She was like the Camilla to my dad’s Prince Charles. Yes, they had gone to elementary school together. Yes, apparently they had been involved before my mom was in the picture, but my dad never talked about her. Not once until he told me they were getting
married.
Which was kind of a shock, considering my mom had just decided to run off and become a flight attendant, leaving us high and dry. I was sixteen-going-on-seventeen, had a boyfriend, and opted to live at my mom’s mostly empty house rather than live with Linda and the “new” family. New being Callie, Chase, and Emma.

I guess it all caught up with me in the long run.

The service was, for the most part, painfully awkward. Someone had put together a slide show of Linda’s life. I couldn’t help but cry when pictures of my dad came on the screen, so I stopped watching halfway through. I twisted a brochure that someone had handed me into absolute shreds to keep myself occupied, and I didn’t notice the pathetic pile in my lap until Dean reached over and grabbed my hands, urging me to stop.

To make things worse, Callie had completely lost control of Emma. She dashed across the aisle and threw herself onto my lap.

Callie glared at me and started crying herself. Chase just looked lost.

Mary did what she could with the older kids, but Emma twisted her hands so far into my hair that it hurt any time I moved, and she wouldn’t let go. I even tried to give her to Dean once and she wailed, adding a new soundtrack to the slideshow, so I just hugged her even more tightly.

Poor, sweet Emma. She was too young to have lost so many people.

She clung to me throughout the entire reception. People kept coming up to me and expressing their sorrows, but I just felt uncomfortable. I didn’t even know what had happened to Linda. For the most part, she had seemed like a healthy individual.

Callie didn’t come anywhere near me, and Chase followed Jed around. Thank goodness that kid was independent, because his sisters were a lot to handle.

Finally, Emma fell asleep. Her little hands were still woven tightly into my hair.

“Here, give her to me,” Dean offered, and it wasn’t without effort. We literally had to disentangle her fingers.

He traded me Emma, and handed me a white calla lily.

“Thanks,” I said, not sure what to make of it.

He smiled.

“Here, I’ll drive you and Emma home. Mary said she’ll take Chase and Callie.”

I nodded and smelled my flower. I couldn’t wait to leave.

“Lead the way.”

I sort of felt as though my life was a dream. It wasn’t anything like what I was used to. In fact, I should probably call my roommate, Olivia, and let her know why I hadn’t been back to Boulder in so long. As far as she knew, I was only going to get my new I.D. since I had turned twenty-one. It was winter break, though, so it wasn’t like I was missing any classes.

Dean and I didn’t say anything after we strapped a still-sleeping Emma into the back seat. For some reason I didn’t feel as if I had to say anything around him, so we just sat in comfortable silence. Whatever was playing on the radio was fine, because it was only background noise anyway. We both had a lot on our minds.

I realized I didn’t know anything about Dean Powell. What kind of music did he like? What did he do when he wasn’t helping me figure my life out? Where did he even live? It had to be somewhere close if he and Jenny were over all the time. Plus, he’d walked home last night.

I looked down at the flower he’d given me and felt a strange sense of déjà vu hit me.

Oh my god. My breath caught in my throat.

He’d given me one like this before. It had to have been him.

I was at my dad’s funeral, but I was a complete mess. I hadn’t opted to live with my mom because I wanted to, but because I felt like he’d replaced me with his new family. I knew I wouldn’t fit in. So I didn’t try to.

I didn’t remember much about that day except for Jed having to carry me to the car to go home, but I did remember that flower. A boy came up to me, handed me a flower, and then he was gone. I was in such a daze that day I wondered if I had just picked it up somewhere and imagined the boy. I could have sworn he had bandages on his face and hands, so over the years I’d decided I had just made it all up in my head.