If You Were Mine (35 page)

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Authors: Bella Andre

BOOK: If You Were Mine
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Atlas missed his best friend terribly and he’d been sluggish

al week. So had she.

Because she missed the man who had become her best

friend.

friend.

In the span of two weeks, Zach Sulivan hadn’t just

managed to get into her pants...he’d charmed his way into her

heart. Even worse, his laughter and warmth had taken up

residence in her soul.

Just as Atlas couldn’t seem to move on from Cuddles, she

hadn’t even come close to shaking herself free of the puppy’s

temporary owner.

The worst part about their breakup, though, was that as the

days crept by and the dust settled around her bruised heart, she

couldn’t help feeling that she’d let him down.

Those first few nights she’d hated herself for thinking she

was
different
, that she could be the one woman a man like Zach

could actualy fal in love with. But that had been anger, and

pride, spinning her wheels. Because regardless of the way the

awful scene had played out between them, she couldn’t deny

that he’d been hurting.

And that was why he’d let her go.

Okay, so maybe love hadn’t been enough for them...at

least, not in that crucial moment of making the choice between

staying and going, between keeping and giving away. But could it

be? If she gave it another chance and stayed this time, to push

past his wals and find out what had hurt him so badly?

Atlas’s sighs turned to snores as he let the warm sun and

her hand on his back lul him to sleep. Heather lay down, her

head on his back, and closed her eyes. What she wouldn’t do

for an hour of restful sleep.

She took in the smels of leaves and fresh-cut grass, the

sounds of birds chirping overhead, the laughter from strangers al

around her. But instead of feeling a sense of peace at the

soothing sounds and sensations, she saw her father’s face in her

mind’s eye

Heather found herself watching a seventeen-year-old girl

confronting her father with his lies. The girl was so brave, so

strong, as the man she had to thank for her dark hair, her long

fingers, had laughed in her face as he told her that what she’d

found out about his secret life on the road wasn’t true, as he

swore she and her mother meant everything to him.

From a distance, she watched that girl turn into a woman,

one who believed her duplicitous father was the blueprint for al

charming men. That laughing eyes and easy professions of love

couldn’t possibly be real.

And then, with perfect clarity, she cut to that moment in the

kitchen when the man she loved wrapped his arms around her

and the dogs to try to shield her from both past and future pain

by simply
being
there for her.

She sat up suddenly, her eyes opening wide.

Al along, Zach had fought for her. From that first moment

when he’d insisted she work with him and Cuddles, until he’d

gotten in that race car last Saturday, he’d been unrelenting in his

insistence that they belonged together. At first, just as friends-

with-benefits, until neither of them could keep denying that they

were so much more than that.

Her stomach twisted as she realized what she’d done. Or,

Her stomach twisted as she realized what she’d done. Or,

rather, what she hadn’t.

Don’t stop loving me
.
No matter what happens,

promise me you won’t ever stop.

He’d begged her for that promise as if he’d known it would

al come down to one moment when he’d try to push her away.

But instead of fighting for him the way he always fought for

her, instead of forcing him to own up to the reasons he was

working so hard to push love out of his life, she’d decided it was

safer to walk away from him instead. Safer for
her
.

Atlas opened one eye as she clipped on his leash and

leaned in close to his muzzle. “Time to go get the girl and the

boy. It’s not going to be easy to win them back,” she said with

her first real smile in a week, “but they’re worth it. And we’re

not going to give up, this time. No matter what.”

* * *

“Goddamned flat tire!”

Zach should have been able to change a tire in his sleep.

But the spare wasn’t cooperating, kept slipping off the studs,

while Cuddles sat on the sidewalk beside him and panted her

encouragement.

He needed to get out of here to start figuring out a way to

win Heather back. He couldn’t stand to waste one more second

without her.

A new spare dropped down next to his head and Zach

looked up to see Ryan standing there, shaking his head. After al

looked up to see Ryan standing there, shaking his head. After al

the cracks he’d made about his brothers faling in love during the

past year, Zach had expected at least one of them to come out

to heckle him.

“You’re a mess. Can’t even change a tire without her

around, can you?”

Zach knew he should be thanking his brother for the new

tire. Instead, he growled, “You’re not safe, asshole. If this can

happen to me—”
This
being faling in love, of course. “—it can

happen to anyone.”

But the brother that was close enough in age for them to

practicaly be twins didn’t look worried as he walked away. He

should be, thought Zach. And when the day came that Ryan lost

it over a girl, he was going to make sure to rub his brother’s guts

in it.

Finaly, with the new spare in hand, he started making

headway. Five minutes and he’d be out of here and working out

a way to make up his colossal screwup to Heather. There had to

be some way to get her to accept his apology, he just wished he

knew what it was...

Just then, something wet and sticky and overly warm

moved over his cheek. He was so surprised, he banged his head

on the side mirror. But even though his ears were ringing and it

took his vision a couple of seconds to right itself, he could make

out the huge paws.

Atlas’s huge paws.

Heather.

He jammed his shoulder against hard metal as he shot to his

He jammed his shoulder against hard metal as he shot to his

feet. The woman he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about for

one single second stood on the sidewalk.

My God, she was beautiful. The most beautiful thing he’d

ever seen.

His fingers itched with the need to grab her, to pul her into

his arms, to thread his fingers into her hair and kiss her.

“Hi.”

The one short word, more breath than sound from her lips,

rocketed through skin and bone, straight into Zach’s heart. A

heart that had finaly started beating again. Just because she was

near.

“I’m sorry.” He’d never apologized for a damn thing in his

life, but he would say the words over and over to her until she

believed him. “I’m so damned sorry. I was just trying to get this

tire on so I could come and tel you. I miss you. I love you.

Please come back to me. And bring your mutt for Cuddles. I’m

not going to hide anything from you anymore. I’m going to tel

you everything, so many things that you’re going to wish I’d

never opened the floodgates.”

She looked like she could hardly believe what he was

saying, but then shock turned to movement and the next thing he

knew she was flying into his arms.

He put his hands in her hair and had his mouth a breath

from hers when she said, “Don’t kiss me yet.”

Knowing he was covered in grease and sweat, he asked,

“Because I stink?”

“Because I stink?”

“No,” she whispered against his mouth. “I love it when you

have one of your rare imperfect moments. It’s because once you

kiss me I’l be too busy wanting you to hear what you have to

say and I’l definitely forget everything I need to say.”

Jesus
. That almost pushed him over the edge, but he could

see, could feel, how serious she was. “Who first?”

“Me.”

“Talk fast.”

Her mouth curved up into a quick little smile before she

took a breath and said, “I’m the one who’s sorry. For leaving

you that night.”

What was she apologizing for? “I made you go.”

“You didn’t make me. I could have stayed. I should have

stayed and made you tel me what was wrong. I should have

done whatever I needed to do to find out what happened to you

out there in that burning race car.” She puled back enough to lift

her eyes to his. “What happened, Zach?”

“You were the only thing I thought about during the crash.”

“What about your family?”

“We’ve had my whole life together. But you and me,” he

smiled at her, “we’d only had two weeks. It wasn’t enough. I

wanted a lifetime of memories with you, not just the ones we’d

crammed into fourteen days. It’s no excuse for the way I

screwed up, but the thought of leaving you one day the way my

father left my mother and al of us...I couldn’t stand it. I’m so

much like him that I always thought I was going to die the way he

did—too young, without any warning. I was so afraid of leaving

did—too young, without any warning. I was so afraid of leaving

you behind that I made you leave me first.” His chest felt tight as

the old beliefs tried to take him over again. “I’ve never told

anyone that before. Only you. Do you stil want to be with me,

even if I die the way my father did?”

“Oh, Zach.” Her hand moved to his jaw, her thumb

stroking over the fading scratches on his cheek. “You can be

such a fool. One I love so much. Of course I stil want to be with

you.”

That was when he knew for sure that she might actualy

take him back. Not just because she was in his arms, not just

because she’d listened to his apology...but because she’d just

caled him out on his stupidity, the way she had so many times

before.

“Can I kiss you now?”

Her gaze dropped from his eyes to his mouth and he could

already taste her sweetness when she said, “Almost.”

He dropped his forehead against hers and groaned.

“Would it speed things up if I mentioned how much I love you

again?”

She grinned, her lips almost touching his—but not quite—

as she said, “I fel in love with you so fast, so deep, I could

hardly keep up with it. But even though I knew I loved you, I stil

didn’t think it was enough.”

“Because love never meant anything in your family.”

She nodded, sighing. “I’ve measured every man against my

father since I was seventeen. You seemed so much like him at

first. So charming, so confident, that I had to keep my guard up

first. So charming, so confident, that I had to keep my guard up

al the time. Only, it turned out that you aren’t like him at al.

You’re sweet and kind and warm and honest...and the only man

alive who could have torn through my control and made it

possible for me to love.” She smiled at him, a smile so beautiful

he lost his heart to her al over again. “But love is just one part of

what I feel for you.”

He was the one puling back in surprise this time. “It is?”

“You taught me to trust. To have faith and hope. How to

laugh again.” She ran the pad of her thumb over his bottom lip.

“And when I’m safe and warm in your arms, just like this, I

know the true meaning of peace.”

Just as he’d been unable to wait so many times before, he

had to take the kiss he wanted, devouring her lips with the

hunger of a man who’d gone without for far too long. Heather

kissed him back with the kind of passion that belonged between

tangled sheets in dark bedrooms, not suburban sidewalks.

He never wanted to stop kissing her, not when he had an

entire week of lost kisses to make up for. Unfortunately, his

family’s clapping and cheering couldn’t be ignored forever.

Heather looked over her shoulder and her eyes went wide.

“Have they been watching the whole time?”

His brothers and sisters and mother and baby niece were

al out on the front lawn now. “Through the windows for most of

it, but I’m guessing they couldn’t stand not hearing every word,

or at least trying to read our lips. Which is a good thing, because

I know how much they’d hate to miss this.”

I know how much they’d hate to miss this.”

He dropped to one knee and her mouth fel open. “Zach?

What are you doing?”

The dogs both nosed his hand as he puled the black velvet

box out of his pocket and opened it up. “Asking you for

forever.”

Her eyes lit up even as her mouth wobbled at the corners.

He knew he wasn’t playing fair by offering her the ring so soon

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