If You Were Mine (29 page)

too, because she couldn’t imagine not having had these past two

weeks with him.

Stil, that didn’t change the fact that she needed to get out

while there was stil a chance of retaining one smal sliver of an

unbroken heart.

“I thought I could do this, but seeing you with the baby and

the dogs and your family—it’s too much. I let myself get in too

the dogs and your family—it’s too much. I let myself get in too

deep. I shouldn’t have been in there today with al of you.”

“They al wanted you there, Heather. And I needed you

with me.” He slid the pads of his thumbs across her cheeks to

wipe her tears away. “Seeing you with the baby—” He paused,

his gaze intense and filed with emotion. “You’re going to be such

a beautiful mother, Heather. So damn beautiful.”

The reverence in his words made her tears fal faster, made

it even more imperative that she say, “I’m sorry. I can’t see you

anymore.”

“Why?” he demanded fiercely.

Because I can’t keep pretending I’m not falling more in

love with you with every breath you take, with every caress

from your strong hands, with every sweet word from your

lips.

Instead of saying any of those things, she forced herself to

shrug. “It was fun, but—”

“Fun?” It was more growl than word. Any trace of the

teasing man he often was completely disappeared as they faced

each other down on an early-morning San Francisco sidewalk.

“We both know it’s been a hel of a lot more than fun.”

She couldn’t let him say anything more. Not when Zach

Sulivan was hands-down the most charming, charismatic man on

the planet, to the point where he actualy made her father look

like a rank beginner by comparison.

And not after she’d just watched a fantasy flash before her

eyes of him holding
their
baby one day.

Desperate to try to save what was left of her heart, frantic

Desperate to try to save what was left of her heart, frantic

to try to keep her soul from being utterly destroyed along with it,

she said, “That’s why we should stop seeing each other—before

either of us gets any deeper.”

“Too late.” His eyes flashed with surprise and he stared at

her in the same stunned disbelief that she’d just experienced

moments before. “Holy hel, I think I’m already in love with

you.”

Her entire body tingled at his words, especialy the several

square inches just beneath her breastbone.

She’d never seen Zach look less than steady on his feet. Or

maybe he just looked that way because she was spinning so fast

from having heard the one four-letter word she’d been certain

Zach Sulivan would never, ever say.

His emotional confession knocked the breath right out of

her. Joy at his words of love warred with disgust at herself for

wanting to hear him say them again, to insist that they would

remain true no matter what she said or did to try and push him

away.

“We agreed,” she said just above a whisper, her throat

raw, the words hoarse. “Just sex. No emotions.
No falling in

love.
”

It was crazy, but the more horrified Heather was by his

being in love with her, the more Zach realized his feelings weren’t

being in love with her, the more Zach realized his feelings weren’t

going anywhere. She hadn’t tricked him into this. His faling for

her had happened al on its own, despite the fact that love wasn’t

supposed to be in his plans.

His chest clenched tight at the thought of leaving both

Heather and the kids he couldn’t imagine not having with her

now, behind too soon. But even though he knew he should be

letting her go find some guy who could realy give her forever, it

turned out he was just as much of a selfish bastard as he’d

always been.

Which was why even thoughts of how crushed his mother

had been by his father’s sudden death couldn’t stop him from

saying, “I changed my mind.”

He slid his hand into her hair the same way he always did

when they were making love. Because that’s what it had always

been, right from the start.

Not just sex, but
love.

“You changed my mind.”

“No,” she protested in her beautiful, stubborn way. He

wouldn’t want her any other way, even as she said, “You can’t

change your mind about love when you don’t even believe in it,

remember?”

“I never said I didn’t believe in love,” he clarified. “I just

said I wasn’t looking for it. But I didn’t know you were coming

into my life. I couldn’t have known.” He looked into eyes that

were so beautiful, whether lit with laughter or hazy with passion.

“I meant it when I said you were mine. From the first moment I

set eyes on you, I knew it. You knew it, too, Heather. That the

set eyes on you, I knew it. You knew it, too, Heather. That the

first time we met, the first time we touched, the first time we

kissed, I was yours.”

She didn’t try to deny it this time, simply said, “I wasn’t

looking for this. I don’t want this.”

Didn’t she see how strong she was? Strong enough to

make better decisions than her mother ever could have? For the

milionth time he wanted to tear her father apart for the way he’d

hurt his beautiful daughter. She’d been innocent, pure like Emma

once...until her father had destroyed her faith.

“I love you, Heather.”

Love for her had been there, inside of him, al along. Seeing

Heather surrounded by his family, and then with Emma, and

knowing how perfectly she fit in with everyone else he loved, had

just made his feelings for her al the more undeniable.

Her beautiful face was ful of so much emotion as she

looked up at him, that his throat clogged just looking at her.

“How do you always do this to me?” she whispered.

Hope lit in him, warring with the dark knowledge that

making her profess her love to him wasn’t fair. Not when he’d

go and die on her too soon, just like his father had.

Shoving the darkness away as he had a thousand times

before, he whispered back, “What do I do, Heather?”

Finaly, she reached for him, putting her hand over his heart

the same way she had their first night together. “You make me

feel so much.”

She wasn’t running anymore, and that should have been

She wasn’t running anymore, and that should have been

good enough. But it wasn’t. He wanted to hear her say she loved

him, too.

“How much?”

“Everything.”

Nothing could have stopped him from kissing her then, and

as his mouth covered hers he realized he didn’t need her to say

the words after al.

Because the love she felt for him was right there in her kiss.

* * *

kept buzzing with reminders of meetings she needed to attend

and voice mails from her assistant. Zach’s siblings texted and

caled to get the dirt on why the two of them had left his

brother’s house so abruptly. Without even discussing it, it was

clear that work, family—al of the usual things that made up their

days—would have to wait.

Only the dogs couldn’t possibly be ignored, not when they

needed to be fed again and taken on a walk to the park to run

off some energy. Throughout, while Heather told Kate to cancel

everything for the rest of the day, and she threw Atlas’s rope and

watched Cuddles tackle it with her entire body, the only thing

Heather could focus on was the way Zach never let go of her

hand for one second.

And the fact that he loved her.

Love
was a word that hadn’t meant anything to her since

Love
was a word that hadn’t meant anything to her since

she was seventeen. She’d been certain it could never impact her

again, not after so many years of hearing her father throw it

around like sparkly confetti.

But when Zach said it, she’d felt the resonance of those

four letters down so deep in her soul that her entire world shifted

on its axis.

She’d tried for so long to pretend love didn’t matter.

It did.

She’d tried for so long to keep that part of her cold.

Untouchable.

Zach had touched her, warmed her.

She’d embraced being alone.

Only to find a man without whose smiles, off-color jokes,

and sensual whispers as she was coming apart in his arms, she’d

be lost.

By the time they got back to the house and Atlas plopped

down on his doggy bed with Cuddles lying across him the way

she loved best, Heather felt like her insides were a volcano on

the verge of exploding.

Her hand was stil in his as they headed for the bedroom.

Zach closed the door with a soft click that sounded like a bulet

going off inside her head.

Feeling shaky, she had to reach for him, had to wind her

arms around his waist and back, knowing he’d be strong. Solid.

She’d never let herself lean on anyone before.

Zach caressed her cheeks, his thumbs brushing over her

mouth before his fingers moved into her hair, to the spot that felt

mouth before his fingers moved into her hair, to the spot that felt

just right whenever he held her there.

“I’ve never made love to anyone before,” she whispered,

overwhelmed by what she was feeling, how strong, how

unstoppable her emotions were.

He leaned closer and his mouth hovered over hers. But

instead of kissing her, he whispered across her lips, “Yes, you

have. Every time we’ve touched, you’ve let me love you.” His

voice was even deeper than normal, and raw with emotion. “And

you’ve loved me right back.”

His reply was utterly unexpected.

And, amazingly, just as true.

Just because she hadn’t wanted to let herself love him,

didn’t mean she’d even come close to succeeding. From that

first brush of their fingertips in the park, to the kiss she’d given

him on his cheek, to passion exploding in the aley at the

balpark...no matter what she’d told herself, no matter how she’d

tried to pretend none of it realy mattered, every second with

Zach had shifted the wals around her heart.

Until they’d come crashing down.

“Love me again, Zach.”

His mouth covered hers a heartbeat later with a kiss that

was so sure and warm and utterly sinful it made her toes curl in

her tennis shoes. He loved her mouth the way he loved every

inch of her skin—with complete possession, unbridled pleasure,

and pure male satisfaction.

His tongue slipped and slid against hers, before moving

back out to run a sensual path across her lips, from one corner

to the other. “So sweet.” He nibbled on the flesh of her lower lip.

“So soft.” His tongue laved over the smal bites, soothing her at

the same time he built her arousal even higher.

And then she was in his arms and he was carrying her over

to the bed, pressing her back into the duvet as he covered her

body with his. Both of them were stil fuly clothed, but that

didn’t stop her from wrapping her legs around him and puling

him even closer.

He deepened their kiss with a possessive growl that sent

the dials on every last nerve in her body way past eleven. There

was no space in their kiss for thinking, for worrying, only the

sweet release of feeling herself open al the way up, inside and

out.

For Zach.

He lifted his head to stare into her eyes.
“Mine.”
The word

was rough, ragged from his lips. Fire burned in his gaze, hotter,

more intense than her beautiful charmer had ever been before.

“You’re mine.”

Before she could tel him yes, she was his, and always had

been, his mouth was stealing her breath away again and his

hands were puling at fabric, unzipping where he could, ripping

when fabric didn’t come off easily enough.

Heather loved every one of his rough demands, the same

ones she was making of him as she kicked off her shoes, then

yanked his shirt off and shoved his pants down with her feet.

She’d never felt this wild, or this free, before.

She’d never felt this wild, or this free, before.

Only with Zach.

She had to run her hands over his hard muscles, his chest

and arms, his back and shoulders, to make sure it wasn’t a

dream. His hands were just as greedy as they stroked over every

inch of her skin, his mouth folowing his fingers from her ankles,

then up her legs to that spot behind her kneecap that had her

trembling and gasping at how sensitive it was before he moved