Hungry for Love (2 page)

Bill laughed only for a second until Mrs. G pointed toward the kids
,
who were involved in an athletic shoving match
,
which of course Will was winning. 
“
Get Mr. G in on the exercise
,”
Bill said
,
waving as he walked back to the car.

“
He has a good heart and a bad ticker
,”
Sophie sighed
,
turning to return to her front door.

“
Kids!
”
said Bill
,
“
C
’
mon already.  Every single day.  Candy
,
you know you sit in the back.  Kids your age have to sit in the back.  It
’
s safer.  So that
’
s the rule.  When you
’
re ten
,
you
’
ll take turns
,
okay
?”

“
Not okay.
”
Candy scowled and scrambled into the front seat anyway
,
snatching the brown bags and dumping out the contents.  Will was about to grab her by the waist and pull her back out but Bill held up a hand to stop him.

“
Dadeeeee
,”
Candy whined
,
“
Look at this.
”
  She held up two cans of Slimfast
,
pulled from the brown bags.

“
Not again!
”
said Will.

Bill shook his head and settled the kids into the car. 
“
We
’
ll stop for something.
”

“
She seemed so normal when we first started dating her
,”
asserted Candy.

“
I miss those days
,”
said Will
,
sighing like an old man longing for the distant past.

Bill drove down his beautiful street
,
observing lush flowers on every lawn and noting that he should do some work in his own yard
,
neglected now for a couple of years.  He pulled into a McDonald
’
s and parked the car.

“
Wow
,”
said Candy
,
“
McDonald
’
s for breakfast again.  My stomach is glowing with joy.
”

“
Your mother would kill me
,”
said Bill. 
“
We
’
d better hurry though.
”

As they sat eating
,
Bill observed Candy squirming in her seat and looking at him as though something very weighty plagued her.  She opened her mouth once or twice then shut it again.  Finally he said
,
“
Something on your mind
,
Toots
?”

Candy gulped.  She mumbled.  She took a big swig of her milk.  She opened her mouth.  She took another gulp.  Then she said
,
“
Now Daddy I don
’
t want you to hate me or anything.
”

“
What
,”
said Bill
,
astonished. 
“
Hate you
?
  My best sweetheart
?
  You know better.
”
  He put his arm around her and squeezed her shoulders tightly
,
his dark eyes smiling.

“
I
’
ve been thinking about this for a while
,
Daddy
,
and I really think we have to break up with Chrissy.
”

Will opened his eyes widely
,
glanced up to the ceiling
,
grimaced
,
then began eating with a feigned level of deep concentration.

“
You do
?”
asked Bill. 
“
Why
’
s that
?”

“
It
’
s the man pause
,”
said Candy.

“
Man pause
?”
asked Bill
,
smiling.

“
Yes
,
Jessica
’
s mom said girls have to get married young because soon enough the man pause comes and then you know what happens.
”

“
What happens
?”
asked Will.  This was a new subject to him.

“
Well
,”
said Candy seriously
,
“
Just like it sounds.  The men pause and don
’
t ask the girl out any more.  Chrissy has been acting crazy lately cause she
’
s afraid of the man pause.  Cause Daddy would never marry her.  Then she
’
ll have man pause and no husband.
”

“
Why do you think I would never marry her
?”
asked Bill.

“
Footwear
,”
said Candy with conviction. 
“
Jessica explained it to me.
”

“
What
?”
asked Bill.

“
Your soles have to be a mate.  She
’
s always in sneakers working out and your shoes are black.
”

“
Yeah well Jessica is right for once.  No way Chrissy is Dad
’
s soulmate
,”
said Will.

Bill looked at his children silently and thought for a while. 
“
Maybe Chrissy is a little stressed about getting older.  It
’
s her birthday in a few weeks
,
but she
’
s only thirty-four—nowhere near man pause.
”
  He laughed. 
“
Maybe we could all be a little more understanding
,
show her we care.  Why don
’
t we try that.
”

Candy looked worried. 
“
Okay Daddy I can try that but I don
’
t see how that fixes the shoe problem.
”

“
Maybe not
,”
said Bill. 
“
C
’
mon
,
let
’
s get you to school.
”
 

After giving the kids money for lunches and dropping them off at their exclusive school
,
Bill knew he should head into the office.  Patients would be waiting.  But he did first what he often chose to do instead
,
stop off to see JoEllen.  He knew it made no sense to be visiting her grave daily.  She
’
d been gone nearly three years.  He was with someone new.  He was allowed to be happy again.  Every single day he reminded himself of that—he was allowed to be happy again.

He stood there silently
,
yet another bouquet of roses in his hands.  Had he bought JoEllen more roses when she was alive and the love of his life or now
,
since she was stony
,
silent
,
and completely unreachable
?
  He didn
’
t know.

Softly he said
,
“
How am I supposed to live in the moment
,
when I never expected to live without you
?
  That
’
s what I want to know.  But will you answer me
?
  Nope.  Never.  And you used to be such a chatterbox.  You hated that didn
’
t you.  You said don
’
t call me that
,
call me loquacious
,
it sounds smarter.
”

Bill stood there for a while
,
just trying to feel JoEllen around him
,
but all he could feel was the memories.  He sighed deeply and under his breath he said
,
“
I feel like a guy who was at the best party ever
,
then for no good reason his gal ditches him way too early and he
’
s stuck trying to make do with all the other guests.  I just wish you
’
d come to your senses and come back.  But no
,
Jesus you
’
re not.
”