Holly's Intuition (3 page)

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Authors: Saskia Walker

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BOOK: Holly's Intuition
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It wasn’t about that.
Tell him
, he urged. In another week he’d have told his family and that was the big hurdle. He was happy in himself, it was tel ing his mother and father he dreaded. That whole drama about grandkids and him being the eldest son was sure to rain down on him. But his sister, Donna, was getting married in just over a week, and his youngest brother, Kyle, had just turned sixteen. Those events would hopeful y deflect some of the disappointment for his parents. Meanwhile, this was a good opportunity to break his silence.

“It’s six months since we split but it’s not because of my ex.” He braced himself for the response. “It’s because I’m gay.”

Sul y stared at him in disbelief, his eyebrows going up then lowering and drawing together. “You’re gay? Since when?”

Joshua shrugged. “Since I realised I was more attracted to a man than the woman I was seeing, I guess.”

Sul y continued to peer at him, but there was nothing offensive in it. In fact he nodded knowingly. “I wondered why you hadn’t been on the scene so much recently.”

It amused Joshua that Sul y was more concerned about where his party buddy had been than the alteration in his sexuality. “Just coming to terms with it. I’ve kept a low profile.”

Sul y continued to look at him intently. “That’s no reason to hide yourself away. You’ve been missed in the after-work scene, you have good friends there.”

“I appreciate you saying that.” Joshua shrugged. “I guess I had some figuring out to do, and I haven’t yet told the family”

“Ah,” Sul y responded. “Good luck with that.”

“It’l be done soon.”

“So, is there someone special?”

“Yes, the guy who made me realise. His name is Stewart.”

Someone cal ed Sul y’s name and held up a phone. Sul y waved then slapped Joshua on the upper arm. “I hope we get to meet him soon.” He nodded in the direction of the reception. “Oh, and don’t worry about Helen, I could tel her you’re spoken for, if you like?”

“Probably for the best,” Joshua replied. “Thanks.”

Sul y lowered his voice conspiratorial y. “Actual y, I’d been thinking of asking her out myself, so you’ve done me a favour.”

He saluted as he walked away.

Joshua laughed, watching him as he headed off.

Do I feel any different
? Yes, it was if some of the weight he’d been carrying around had been lifted off him. It hadn’t been hard to do. In fact it had felt good. It was bound to be easier with work col eagues and friends than it would be with family. Nevertheless, he was longing for next week to be over.

Once Donna was happily married, he could sit down with his parents and tel them about it and it would be out in the open and done with.

As he returned to his desk he pictured his mother’s face. She didn’t have a bigoted bone in her body, but she would be sad. It was inevitable. She aspired to having a daughter-in-law she could shop with, and grandkids. His dad was old-fashioned and set in his ways, and he might have more trouble coming to terms with it. Would his father be able to look him in the eye once it was out? He hoped so. Rueful y, he faced up to the fact it might take time. A long time.

Fifteen years ago he’d thought the hardest thing he’d ever done was tel ing them he didn’t want to go into the family business with his dad, and that he wanted to go to university and work in high finance instead. That was nothing compared to this.

* * * *

 

“Bloody hel ,” Hol y exclaimed into the night. She’d been lying in bed with her quilt over her face, wil ing the images and sensations to go away, but it was even worse than the night before and her libido was raging like a forest fire out of control as a result.

Next door, Joshua was taking control of proceedings, undressing his lover in between long, luxuriant kisses. The emotions she was getting from him were positive, almost elated. She couldn’t quite fol ow it, but something that had happened at work had made him this way. He’d also been to the doctor and his col arbone had mended. Tonight he was fit enough to get it on with Stewart just the way he wanted.

Stewart was the dominant lover in their relationship, but Joshua liked to feed it back, he liked to exhibit his gratitude and his wil ingness. Hol y sensed wave after wave of emotion coming from Joshua, and it was powerful stuff. The accident had made him appreciate what he had, made him want even more of life’s rich experiences.

Riding on the tail of his emotions, she felt breathless with excitement and she found herself smiling, even though she didn’t ful y understand why.

I want this
. That was why. Even though she had spent a good part of the day cursing it and seeking the advice of her sisters, she knew she wouldn’t give up her secret viewing ability for the world. The experience was deeply erotic, arousing and almost exalted in its richly textured emotions. To experience just a taste of it was too good. Somewhere deep inside her mind a voice reminded her she had to have dinner with them the next day. She had to sit there and look as if she knew nothing of their private lives. The problem was she couldn’t help herself. Resting her hand on her chest, she stopped fighting it and pushed away the guilt, al owing herself to take it al in.

Pride swelled inside Josh as he undressed this big, brusque man who’d made him turn, the man who’d made him deny what his family expected

—a girlfriend, wife and children. With his hands inside the big man’s shirt, he rubbed Stewart’s hard nipples with his fingertips, making Stewart arch
and shudder. He ran his hands down his lover’s hard abdomen, stroking each and every muscle, memories whispering through his mind of the times
they had first chatted together in Stewart’s gym. Joshua had gone there to work out during the icy weather when he couldn’t cycle as much, the year
before. Even after the snow had gone, Stewart kept drawing him back to the place. They chatted, and Joshua gravitated to the times when Stewart was
on duty, timing his visits so that they could talk. Sometimes they worked out together if the gym wasn’t busy and Stewart could leave his post at the
reception. At first, Joshua identified it as sound male friendship, nothing more. His admiration for Stewart was easy to excuse at first. Until one day
they had an encounter in the communal male shower area, and there was no denying what he really wanted.

As the memory of that forbidden encounter flitted through his mind, ever so briefly, Hol y’s lust hit fever pitch. She thrust her hand between her legs, cupping her pussy tightly and squeezing it for relief. Too soon his thoughts moved on, and she prayed and hoped that he would think of that first encounter again. She wanted to know what had gone on and how their first sexual encounter had evolved. Capturing her bottom lip between her teeth, she tried to ground herself, but it was no good. Joshua was now thinking about what he was about to do to Stewart.

Going to make you come, lover.
The determined thought echoed round Hol y’s mind. Hol y groaned and writhed in her bed, her fingers paddling her swol en clitoris. It wasn’t good enough. What she wanted was what she could feel tantalisingly through that psychic connection—a hard cock. Her face heated as the blatant realisation ran through her.

Joshua was so vividly aware of his erection and what he wanted to do with it, it drove her wild. She wanted to be there with them and she couldn’t help imagining how it might feel to hold both their cocks, one in each hand, and work them up and down. She squeezed her clit, spreading her juices over it.

It stil wasn’t enough.

The nagging ache at the pit of her bel y was building, until al she could think about was finding relief, fil ing herself with something hard and riding it.

She threw back the quilt and leapt out of bed, charging for the wardrobe. Dropping to her knees, she rooted around inside it.

Two years ago her flatmate, Caroline, had given her a vibrator as a joke for Christmas. She’d never wanted to use the thing, not until now. Now she was desperate for something big and hard inside her and masturbating with her fingers just wasn’t cutting it tonight.

“Too damned close, but too far away,” she muttered.

Meanwhile Joshua had released Stewart’s impressive erection from his jeans and was stroking it. She could feel the heat of it in her hand and needed the vibrator to fil the space where she wanted it to be.

In between stacks of shoes and retired handbags, her hand knocked up against the stiff plastic packaging and she retrieved it from the depths of the wardrobe. Darting back to the bed, she attempted to get it open as she went, which seemed almost impossible. Eventual y she prised off the packaging and got the thing out.

It felt magnificent under her fingers, long and hard and phal ic. She never thought she’d be so glad to see the wretched thing, but now she wanted to worship it. She switched it on. Her heart fel . “No batteries!”

She darted to her dressing table drawer, rifled around and found an open package. Merciful y the requisite number of batteries was in the packet and the thing came on when she fitted them. By the time she got back on the bed and got comfy with her new best friend, Joshua was on his knees in front of Stewart, giving him what she could only describe as the most unbelievably sexy blowjob she had ever seen or imagined, while raking his fingernails over the big guy’s sexy arse cheeks, and it was driving her mental with lust.

Hol y paused and savoured the absolute sexual pleasure of witnessing such an experience—the incredible vision of male eroticism. The way they handled each other thril ed her, and the hot passion between them was the most intensely arousing she’d ever witnessed. Once again guilt clawed at her conscience, then lust pumped through her, overriding it for the moment at least.

She flipped the switch on her vibrator. It started to hum, and the overpowering need for release drove her to take action. She ran the vibrator into her sticky folds then eased it over her clit. The swol en nub thrummed in delight, and she moved the vibrator either side of it while she focussed on what was sticky folds then eased it over her clit. The swol en nub thrummed in delight, and she moved the vibrator either side of it while she focussed on what was happening between her neighbours.

Stewart stood in the middle of the bedroom. The moonlight from the window outlined him and the man keeling at his feet. She was fascinated by the way Joshua worked him. He was an intense man, and that was reflected in the way he made love to Stewart, who was more visceral and raw in his approach to sex. Joshua studied his lover’s reactions, acting on them. The building pressure he felt in his own cock made Hol y thrust the vibrator deep inside.

If I were there
, she thought, as she worked the vibrator in and out,
I could be the one sucking Stewart, and have Joshua’s cock inside me
. She pictured herself on her hands and knees between them. The deviant thought made her gasp aloud and squirm, and she flicked the vibrator up a notch, unable to string it out.

Then she felt Joshua working his lover faster, stroking his shaft with one hand as he took a good portion of it into his mouth, his free hand raking over Stewart’s fit buttocks, giving the big man the edge of pain that he liked. That was too much for her and Hol y came, her core clamping on to the sex toy.

By the time she’d level ed and the toy had slipped free of her slick channel, Stewart came. Moments later—while Joshua wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and grinned up at him—Stewart pul ed him to his feet and directed him to the bed. When Joshua reclined, the big man was over him in a flash, on his hands and knees as he returned the favour, sucking him off.

Cursing into the night, Hol y wondered if this would drive her mad. She was a slave to the connection. Why was this happening to her? And why in hel ’s name had she agreed to go to dinner with them?

I must already be mad
.

With a heartfelt, lusty sigh, she reached once again for the vibrator.

 

Chapter Four

Hol y’s concerns about whether it was the right thing to do or not slipped from her mind the moment Joshua opened the door the next evening. He beamed at her and beckoned her in. After he took the bottle of wine she held in one hand, he wrapped his free arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek. Hol y’s senses flared into life, her nervousness forgotten as the intimate gesture melted her. His thoughts, too, were deeply pleasured, as if seeing her there made him happy.

“You smel good, look damned good too.” He looked her dress over approvingly. “
Bella
,
bella
.”

“Thanks. Hey, do you have Italian blood?” It popped into her head because of his choice of words. It also made sense of his dark good looks.

“Yes indeed, on my mother’s side. She was born in a smal town outside Naples, but she’s been living in England since she was six years old.”

“That explains a lot.”

He gave her a curious glance.

“The dark hair and…” she nodded her head into the flat, “…I can smel something delicious. Garlic, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Very astute. I hope you like garlic?”

“I love garlic.” She couldn’t help smiling.

He took her hand and led her into the kitchen. “It’s a pleasure to cook for someone who appreciates the importance of a good aroma. My flatmate would live on steak and eggs, given half a chance.”

Hol y resisted the urge to respond to that. Pushing aside her intimate knowledge, she reminded herself that as far as she was concerned they
were
just flatmates and no more. Instead, she admired the way he looked. She usual y encountered him in cycle gear—which had its own appeal, being skin tight and al —or a suit for work. This evening he was wearing an indigo-blue smart-casual shirt, open at the neck, sleeves rol ed up, and fitted jeans. He was a good-looking man, lean and intense, with brown eyes that made people do a double-take because they were rich as dark chocolate.

As she fol owed him down the hal way her gaze dropped to his hips, and a series of intimate images of him and Stewart flashed through her mind.

She tossed back her hair and took a deep breath, attempting to blot them out. She couldn’t afford to let images like that distract her, not tonight. He put his arm loosely around her waist and directed her to the table, which was set for three. “And you have a sweet tooth…right? Please tel me of a sweet tooth.”

She nodded.

“Stewart won’t eat anything too indulgent, because his body is ‘a temple’ or some nonsense. It’s good to have you to spoil.”

Hol y glanced over at the cooker. Every burner was on and the oven, too, by the looks of it. “Wow, how much are you cooking?”

“Just a few dishes to choose from. I made an effort, seeing as it was you.”

There was a new sense of intimacy between them. It struck Hol y and she wondered if he was aware of the deeper connection. He’d been grateful she’d been there that day, at the accident and after, she knew that, and it had made them closer. It would, she supposed, but she doubted he knew how much closer she was to him now.

His expression grew serious. “It’s a smal gesture. I can never thank you enough for what you did for me.”

Hol y stared into his eyes. She saw gratitude and something more. There was definitely a new sense of understanding between them. She tried to sense if he was aware of it. Yes, her psychic connection told her that he did feel closer to her, but he believed it was because she’d been there in his hour of need. For a moment it made her more comfortable about her secret knowledge of him.

He leaned over and hugged her. At first she was startled then Hol y let herself slide into the embrace, wrapping her arms around his back.

“Thank you,” he whispered against her ear.

“I only did what anyone else would do,” she said. “No need to go to any trouble because of that.”

He was thinking about her, specifical y thinking about seeing her when he came round and how good that had been. Holding her close, he hugged her. When she breathed him in, her heart rate lifted. The smel of his cologne and his underlying essence affected her. Hol y’s eyelids fluttered down and her breath caught in her throat. The hard line of his body against hers felt so damn sexy that heat pooled in her groin. An image of him up against the wal with Stewart shunting against him flashed through her mind.

She opened her eyes and wil ed it away, but when she did she saw Stewart standing in the doorway, watching them. That made her hotter stil .

He was just pul ing a shirt on, his belt hanging open and his hair stil damp from the shower. Her gaze drifted over his splendid physique. One glimpse of his bare chest—so built and powerful—made her situation worse. Captured in Joshua’s embrace while looking across his shoulder at Stewart, half-dressed, turned her on even more.

There was a curious look on Stewart’s face and it was somewhere between brooding and aroused. For a moment she thought he was looking at them both with sexual hunger, but she dismissed it. It was Joshua he wanted, she was incidental. However, it made her seriously address what he’d said the day before about being bisexual. He wanted women too. Images of the two men together on the bed fil ed her mind again, but this time mixed in with them was the desire to be right there with them, to be more than a secret voyeur, to be an actual participant. The deviant desire to be between them shocked her. Impossible, she reminded herself. They were a couple. She was just a neighbour who’d become a friend.

Drawing free of Joshua’s embrace she forbade herself to think such thoughts, but her body was refusing to cooperate. Between her thighs she was hot and damp, her entire groin sizzling with expectation. Now she knew for sure that she had done the wrong thing. She was insane, having accepted an invitation to sit at a dinner table with two guys who she’d secretly witnessed so thoroughly compromised. What she’d seen and experienced had turned her on, but it was only now standing in the kitchen with them so close at hand, so real and so male, that she could no longer deny her deepest desire—to join them.

Joshua stroked her cheek and smiled, then reached past her and pul ed out a chair. “Get comfy. I’l finish off the preparations.”

As she took the seat he pul ed out for her, she sensed a kind of yearning in him, which she identified as the eagerness to thank her, to repay her in some way.

“I’m on wine duty, right?” Stewart said as he joined them, pushing his shirt into his jeans and reaching for the loosely buckle.

“Yup, it’s open and breathing in the sitting room,” Joshua replied.

Hol y had to tear her gaze from his hands as he buckled up that belt.

“Sorry about this, I’m running late,” he commented, when he caught her eye. He grinned. Was that a naughty look she saw in his expression?

“He’s a showoff,” Joshua interjected. “Any chance to reveal his stunning pecs and he’l use it.”

Stewart shrugged that off and disappeared, returning a moment later with two bottles. Hol y took a large swig of the wine as soon as it was poured, grateful for the distraction.

“Here’s to good company,” Joshua lifted his glass.

When the three of them chinked their glasses together, Hol y became increasingly aware of his buoyant mood. For Joshua, tonight was about being with friends and forgetting about forthcoming family nuptials and the stress of big announcements.

While he served up the food—a selection of dishes including salmon and broccoli in pesto, linguini, and baked eggs Florentine—Hol y found herself chatting with Stewart about the difference in their flats. “Your kitchen diner is the other way around to mine, and so much bigger,” she said.

“I gutted it when I bought the place. Is yours a two-bed?”

“Yes, and it has much smal er rooms in general.”

Joshua started heaping her plate with food and she had to wave her hand because he was giving her enough for four.

Meanwhile, Stewart went for the salmon and the eggs. “That’s what I came to look at but then I saw this one. It has three beds and was more than I wanted to pay, but the sitting room has dual aspect and it’s a great view. I figured I’d sublet a room to cover the extra expense.”

“I can see that would be tempting. Mine’s at the back of the building, no view to speak of, but I’m only renting.” She tasted the salmon and nodded, warbling her approval while she ate. “This is so good.”

Josh beamed.

“You moved in with someone else,” Stewart asked, “didn’t you?”

“Yes, a friend, Caroline. We work together. She got engaged and then moved in with her fiancé.”

“Who do you rent from?”

“Jim Brentwood, he’s a retired historian, lives on the ground floor. He owns three or four of the flats in the building, invested in them years ago. Do you know him?” When they shook their heads, she smiled. “I bet you’ve seen him. He’s quite a character, and a good landlord, very easy going.”

The conversation continued on in the reasonably safe areas of work, home and food during the meal, much to Hol y’s relief. She had to keep pul ing her thoughts back to the straight and narrow, because it was difficult to stop admiring them across the table, but mostly she managed it. That was until Joshua told her what he had in mind for dessert.

“Taste test?” she queried, voice faltering.

“Yes, shut your eyes and I’l feed you.”

At the same time as she felt his sense of fun building, her internal warning signals began to sound.

* * * *

 

Joshua stared at Hol y, mesmerised. She had the most sensuous mouth he’d ever seen. Her lips were ful and suggested a passionate nature. What would it be like to kiss her? he wondered. Fascinated, he paused as he was about to feed her a spoonful of tiramisu.

“Josh?”

He met Stewart’s inquisitive glance.

Stewart stood behind Hol y with his hands over her eyes as they teased her with the desserts, getting her to guess what each one was from the flavour. After a hugely enjoyable meal and much laughter, it had seemed like a fun thing to do. Joshua felt wired and yet somehow mel ow at the same time. The good company had made him that way. Hol y was a joy to be around.

Stewart gave him a quizzical glance.

Joshua snapped into action. “Open wide,” he encouraged.

Her lower lip trembled slightly as she waited, the tip of her tongue just visible inside her lips. When he looked lower, at the pale skin of her throat, he could see a pulse beating rapidly at the base. With her lips parted and her trusting pose, al he could do was stare at her. It was a sexy look, and it suited her. She was an intriguing woman, with a tentative smile and eyes that made him think of a summer sky, clear and pale blue and fil ed with possibility. If he wasn’t already in a relationship—and he wasn’t gay—he’d be tempted to ask her out.

Hol y gave a sharp intake of breath and tensed.

Weird
. Joshua felt as if he must have said that aloud, because of her reaction.

Stewart gave a wry laugh, shifting the strange mood. “Are you going to give her that, or torture us both by making her wait?” When Joshua met his accusing glance, Stewart cocked his head on one side, an accusing look in his eye. “This blindfold taste session is turning me on.”

“Oh, Stewart, please don’t say that,” Hol y said, in a distinctly breathless tone. She reached back and grasped his forearm with one hand, squeezing it, a nervous laugh escaping her. Her cheeks had flushed with colour.

It was true though. Joshua could tel his lover was aroused, and the strange thing was that he was, too. The setup should have felt peculiar, it should have felt wrong, but it didn’t. Just a playful moment between three friends, he assured himself, and forced his actions on. “Here it comes.”

As he put the spoonful of decadent dessert between her lips and she closed her mouth, some of it was left smudged on her lips. Stewart bent over her, and wiped it away with one finger. When he took that finger to his own mouth and sucked it, it was with a devilish glance in Joshua’s direction.

What the hell was that about?
Joshua had the distinct feeling Stewart was playing a game al of his own.

“Ah, delicious.” She nodded her head. “Tiramisu, my favourite.”

Stewart removed his hands, but rested them on her shoulders and again locked gaze with Joshua. The teasing glance lingered there in his eyes and Joshua felt unsettled by it. That feeling didn’t ease up any when he looked down at Hol y. Unveiled, her expression was verging on astonished. She looked at him with curiosity and wonder. Surely his dessert couldn’t alone have brought that about?

The phone rang and somehow it felt as if he’d been saved by the bel . “I’l get that.”

He headed over to where the phone was stationed on a wal unit. Picking it up, he answered then wedged it between his chin and his shoulder while he fil ed the kettle, preparing to make coffee.

“Hel o, love.”

“Hi, Mum.”

“I’m not interrupting am I? I hear music.”

“No, you’re not interrupting. We’ve got Hol y over for—”

“Hol y from the hospital?” she interrupted, and she sounded delighted.

His mother had raved about Hol y when he’d been stuck in the hospital. Not surprisingly. Hol y was pretty, grounded and sweet-natured. She had a heart of gold, and his mum had said as much. What mother wouldn’t like her? “Yes, Hol y from the hospital.”

He glanced over at them to see if they’d noticed what was being said, but they were otherwise occupied. Stewart had sat down next to Hol y and faced her, one hand loosely along the back of her chair. They were whispering to each other over the plate of biscotti, and Joshua noticed the way Stewart was looking at her. He real y was attracted to her. For a moment Joshua didn’t hear what was being said at the other end of the phone. Stewart was bisexual, and although Joshua knew that he’d never seen him with a woman. Wel , not one that he was attracted to. It was a strange experience. Was it jealousy? He didn’t feel that way, not exactly. It was, however, a bit perturbing.

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