Her Love Ran Crimson (Crimson Series) (3 page)

As I stand there staring up at the porch, I try to build up some sort of confidence to move forward. I brush off the non-existent lint from my shirt and try to stand tall because I know he came here to scare me, to intimidate me, to send me a warning.. I have to act strong even if I wasn’t...yet. He knows he gets whatever he wants, which he made very clear the day my mother was killed. He also proved that coming back here, showing he didn’t care about anything other than what he wants. I walk up to the porch, putting on the bravest face I can manage “What are you doing here?” I stood straighter trying to show some sort of strength, or back bone that I surely don’t have. The devilish chuckle that came out of him made me want to run and hide, but I stand my ground because I know there isn’t any other way.

“Sweet Maddison, are you always so rude to your guests?”

“Seeing as you are not welcome here, you are not a guest. I was just coming home to tell Frank what you have done and how much money you have cost him.” Finally I look over to Frank. He is gritting his teeth at me. I am scared for a moment as I watch anger enrage his eyes.

“Maddie dear…”

I cringe at the false endearment.

“I told you that we are back in business together. I will not have you doing anything to mess that up for me. You did enough damage the last time you tried to meddle in my personal business.”

Feeling complete defeat, I shut my mouth and walk into the house. As I pass Frank, I ask him, “How much do you owe this time?” When he doesn’t respond I know he is in deeper than I ever imagined. I slam the door behind me as I walk down the hallway to my room. I close my door and sink to the floor holding myself together only by the comfort of hugging myself tightly. I am so completely frightened thinking what this means for me. I let the sobs wrack my body and take over. I have nobody. I am completely alone in this. For a moment I allow Jase’s face flash in my head before I disregard it and let the hidden pain spill out of me.

I miss my mom. She was my best friend. She knew things were getting out of hand and she tried her hardest to get us out of here. If only I had just complied and done what was ordered of me, she would still be here with me. We would have been thousands of miles away living together, happy knowing we got away. Frank was not always with us as I was growing up. Once my mother figured it out that my real father was never going to show face, she moved on trying to find somebody who would show any interest in her and I. Frank was a smooth guy, my mother worked, and she provided for me. Frank was just a con artist looking for someone to mooch off of. He pretended to love her and because she was so lonely, she convinced herself that this was love. She was broken when my real father left her the day she told him she was pregnant. They weren’t married. They were just dating at that point and having a good time. They were young and still finding themselves. When she told him she was pregnant, he fled. He never came back. She always held out hope that he was just scared and would realize he made a mistake and would come back. That never happened.

Frank came along when I was a little over four years old. He bombarded his way into our home and life, pretending to care and love us. He adopted me, pretending to love me only so he could make sure there was nothing she could do to get away from him. He was comfortable not having to work a normal job, doing his dealing from the house because she wasn’t home during the day. It took a long time for my mom to figure it out. Finally when she did, she was already in too deep. Frank use to hit my mom. She was terrified to leave him, saying he would find her and drag her back.

A loud banging on my door startles me out of my memories. I jump up to answer it, but Frank takes the liberty of barging in before I get a chance. I know this is going to be a fight.

“How could you be so stupid? You should have never talked to him that way. You know what he is capable of. Do I need to remind you that your mother is gone and you should be too, so if you want to mouth off to him go ahead, but you will end up like your mother.”

He’s so close to my face I can feel the spray of his words shower me. I am shaking with pure fear, but the anger running through me gives me the push I need to yell back. “He followed me to school, Frank. He knew where to find me because you sent me to his house. You gave me no clue about who I was going to drop off the package to.
You
put me in danger, not me. He broke out all the windows in my car and slashed my tires, so don’t stand here and tell me how much damage he can do. I already know. My mother is dead because of you and your poor choices.”

It all came out in a rush and I finally take a much need breath. I am so worked up I just want to smash something. I count to twenty to try and stop some of the adrenaline pumping through my veins. “This is your mess. Clean it up or I will tell somebody this time. I am not covering for you anymore. I won’t live my life in this fucked up bubble you have us in anymore, Frank!” Then it happens so fast I don’t even have time to protect myself. He slaps me straight across the face and the force throws me to the floor. I hold my stinging cheek, trying to force back the tears that I don’t want to shed in front of him.

“Don’t be an ungrateful little bitch. I will go get your car taken care of and then you will do exactly what I tell you to do. You live under my roof. You will not mess this up for me again,” he spits out between clenched teeth.

I swear I can see the steam rising off from him from the heated anger he is throwing out at me. He slams the door on his way out so hard the walls shake. With that I just give up and hurl myself onto my bed and cry again until sleep comes and finds me.

Chapter Three

I wake up screaming and kicking the sheets. They feel like they are suffocating me, which is an all too familiar feeling. It’s pitch black in my room. I make my way across my room, blind in the dark, feeling with my hands in front of me feeling for the light switch. I flip the switch and rub my eyes as they adjust to the bright light. I go in search of my backpack, which has my purse in it, to find my phone to see what time it is. I notice I have a text message.

Unknown: That was just a warning today. Don’t you forget who I am and what I could do.

I hurry and hit delete on the message and close my eyes for a second, knowing this is not going to end unless I do something about it. What, I don’t know yet, but something. I finally open my eyes and check the time. I can’t believe it’s already 5:45 in the morning. I have no clue how I have slept this long seeing as I went to bed way before the sun even set. The fight with Frank has completely exhausted me. I still feel like I can sleep some more, but instead decide it’s time to start getting ready for school. My stomach grumbles angrily from skipping dinner last night. It’s a necessity to stop and get my coffee fix so I’ll just grab a bagel from the local coffee shop. I slowly open my door and peek out. The house is still dark and quiet. I sneak off to the bathroom, trying to be as quiet as I can while I take the world’s fastest shower and finish getting ready.

Thankfully, when I look in the mirror I notice that the blow to my face last night didn’t leave a huge mark. I really had no desire to explain what happened if anybody bothered to notice, so I covered it with a little concealer. I still have an hour and a half before school starts, which is a good thing because I never got a chance to do my homework. I tip toe out of my room and down the hall, happy I hear nothing. I make it out without Frank knowing and hurry to my car. It’s all fixed up already as he said it would be. The only reason he fixes it up so fast is because I am his little errand girl when it suits him. In his line of money-making he has people everywhere.

I drive to my favorite local coffee shop like I do every morning, unless I have an errand to run for Frank. I drool at the display case holding the most scrumptious pastries, little cakes, and homemade doughnuts. They are the best bakery around. I place my order and nibble on the delicious chocolate croissant as I wait for my coffee. When I get my coffee, I head to a table, hoping I have enough time to finish all of my homework before school. I am cutting it really close. I pick a table against the window in the corner away from the morning crowd. Just as I get comfortable, I notice a black Range Rover pull into the parking lot. I hold my breath nervously. What are the odds that Jase might be in that SUV?

Whoever is in the car is taking a really long time getting out. I feel like I’m on the brink of passing out from the lack of oxygen. I can’t help but hold my breath in anticipation. I exhale a deep sigh of relief when I see a woman get out. I am a little disappointed because I wanted it to be Jase. I wanted him to tell me everything was going to be okay and maybe for just a brief moment since my mother died I could feel wanted and not like a damaged monster I am now after what happened with Dixon. I can feel the little tiny sliver of hope I have at getting out of here when I turn eighteen now disappearing and seeming absolutely unattainable.

I look at my phone and notice I have been here way too long, so I pack up quickly and get ready to start my repetitive day. Before my mom died, when I actually had some friends, I was told they couldn’t ever come to my house due to them finding out what Frank was involved in. It also wasn’t safe to bring people there. I usually hang out at the park or the Public Library to do my homework or read, or just to stay away from my house. I don’t want any part of Frank’s life, but right now I don’t have a choice and I fear for my life. I know I should tell someone, but he has made sure I can’t say anything. He has had me running things around for him for years. At first I had no clue what I was doing. Then once I got curious when I was taking an envelope to Dixon, so I peeked. Dixon caught me. He had appeared at my car window. That is when he started to make my life hell. He knew I knew and could take him down, so he silently threatened me by flashing me what was in the waist band of his black slacks. I felt my face whiten which caused him to grin in sick pleasure because he knew that would make me keep quiet.

I clear my things off the table and walk to my car, get in, and start toward the school. When I pull into the student parking lot, I scan the lot for Jase’s car. My heart sinks when I don’t see it. I have to remind myself that we aren’t even friends. I shouldn’t be getting all upset from him not being here. I really need to get a grip and figure out how to go back to where I just existed and nobody else mattered, but my heart keeps telling me Jase does matter.

After getting my things out of the car and pulling myself together I get to class with only seconds to spare before the bell rings. I glance around and notice Jase isn’t in class. I am really torn on how I feel about him not being here. In a way I am happy he isn’t here to ask unanswerable questions, but I am also sad because I really miss the way my heart rate spikes when I see his beautiful green eyes fixate on me.

To distract my thoughts, I bury myself in my school work and focus on getting the rest of my unfinished assignments completed for the next class. I have really been dropping the ball these last couple of days. I am letting myself get too incredibly caught up in a fairy tale that doesn’t exist for me. Happy endings are only made for movies with princesses and people of a normal caliber. That was not me. Before I know it the bell rings. I place tonight’s homework in my folder along with the work I just completed. I don’t see Jase in the next class either. A horrible thought crosses my mind and I start to have a little panic attack. He took me close to my house yesterday. What if somebody saw him? Just as I am in full out panic mode, I remember Dixon was already at my house. He couldn’t have seen him.

Then seriously, cue the cliché music. Just as I am settling down from my freak out, Jase strides through the doors. I swear if he didn’t have is hair gelled in perfect spikes and a tight shirt showing off all his toned definition of his arms I hadn’t noticed before, you would have seen the wind blowing through his brown locks of hair and his clothes being blown back in the wind. Total Fabio moment! That is the type of entrances he makes in my mind. This is becoming some sort of sick torture I am putting myself through. Our eyes lock and the air is so thick I have to quickly look away to stop the fireworks exploding in my heart. My pulse is rising and I swear it is going to burst through my veins. He walks to his desk. While passing me he whispers something so quietly, I almost miss it.

“I’m glad to see you’re okay.”

I can’t contain the grin that is betraying my logical thoughts. He is actually relieved to see me; did that mean he was worried about me? Like he thought he wouldn’t see me again?

I open my book and stare at it, unable to make sense of anything I am reading because my mind keeps replaying what he just said. I look over as fast as I can, trying to steal a quick glance of the perfect contour of his face. Of course he catches me, and I feel my cheeks turn crimson as he flashes me a mischievously perfect smile, knowing I was just caught. I look back to my book slightly embarrassed. Maybe he didn’t notice, but I am sure the blush in my cheeks begs to differ.

Not being able to focus, I am flooded with relief when we are dismissed. As I am walking to my locker I can feel him before I notice him next to me. When Jase is certain he has gained my attention he picks up the pace and walks in front of me and suddenly turns to me while walking backwards.

“I was pretty worried about you last night. I didn’t get your number, so I couldn’t check up on you to make sure you got home alright.”

I am sure the smile filling the inside of me was going to burst out. I stay composed and try to play it off like it doesn’t matter. I am finding it harder and harder to play the “I don’t care” role anymore. I really need a friend. I am craving interaction. Not so much so I can confide all my secrets in someone, but plain and simple, I am tired of living for everybody else and letting them do with me as they please, putting me in harm’s way. It is that moment I have an epiphany. I can be his friend at school. What will be the harm in that? I just have to lay down some ground rules for myself and not let myself get carried away because that is when I will slip up and make mistakes. I can do school friends. Anything more I can’t put somebody through.