Her Canadian Dream [Her Canadian Dream] (Siren Publishing Classic) (13 page)

If it turned out she was pregnant she didn’t want it “dealt with.” She wanted to have the baby. She wanted someone to call her own, someone to love her as she would love him or her.

Packing done, she hefted her case down the stairs and out to her small car. The wind whipped her hair across her face as she loaded the bags into the boot and locked it. Luckily, the snow seemed to have abated slightly so she wasn’t too worried about the drive down the highway to Toronto. It was a straight road and if traffic wasn’t too heavy she could do it in less than three hours.

Going back inside for her handbag, she decided at the last minute to leave a note for Aiden. It wouldn’t be fair to just disappear with no word. There was a pen and pad next to the telephone in the hallway so she picked them up and started to write. Her heart was breaking as she ended the best thing she’d ever had in her life.

Dear Aiden,

I’m sorry but I have to go. I only had until February anyway so I am just leaving a little earlier than planned.

Thank you so much for all you have done for me. The past two days have been wonderful and have given me an insight into a lifestyle I believe I could thoroughly enjoy, at the right time, with the right person. I had hoped it could be you but we never had a chance really, because we were always on a timescale. Leaving now is easier than becoming involved and then leaving four months down the line.

Please don’t worry about me. I will find somewhere to live and hopefully get myself a job real soon. And, about the other thing. Please don’t think you have a responsibility to me. If it should turn out that I am expecting a baby I wouldn’t want you to worry about me coming to you and demanding money or anything else. I’ll be fine.

Please give Jan a hug from me. I will miss her and Brett, as I will you, too.

Be happy.

Love,

Alyssa x

Before she could change her mind, she ran out to her car and started up. She refused to look behind her but tears blinded her vision as she drove down the lane to the main highway. Once there, it took all her concentration as the road was slick and the traffic heavier than she had anticipated. There was no room for error so she had to put everything else out of her mind and concentrate on driving.

* * * *

As he drove down the lane he smiled to himself as he planned what he wanted to do with Alyssa this evening. She was definitely a quick learner and his idea for tonight was to introduce her to a few of his toys from the big leather bag he used at the club. Her admittance that she had never been fucked in her ass was such a turn-on and he intended to be the first. But first he had to prepare her with the use of a couple of butt plugs. His mouth watered in anticipation as he turned the corner by the house.

Something’s wrong here. No lights. Surely Alyssa hasn’t gone out in this weather?

Switching off the engine, he climbed out of his vehicle and strode through the thickening snow to the front door. It was locked so it was obvious she wasn’t in. Using his key to let himself in, he called out anyway, wondering whether she had just gone upstairs for a nap and was sleeping heavily. After all, they had been awake most of last night.

“Alyssa! Alyssa, baby!”

There was no answer as he called out. Walking through the house, switching on the lights, it soon became apparent that it was empty. Worried now, he went out to the telephone in the hall to see if there was a message left on there for him. As he went to pick up the handset, he noticed the piece of folded paper tucked to the side.

With dread starting to niggle at him, he opened the piece of paper and read the contents.

What the fuck? She’s gone? Where? Why?

He re-read the note.

Did she really think he was in this just to teach her a few BDSM tricks? And what if she was pregnant? Did she really intend him never to know?

He looked at his watch. Almost seven. He was later than he intended to be because his dad had needed a hand fixing something in the basement.

He thought back to this morning when he had found her looking at her laptop. She must have been booking her flight then. So what time would it be and would he be able to get to the airport before it left?

Running up the stairs he went into his office opposite Alyssa’s room. He booted up his PC and went straight to the website of the cheapest airline that flew across to the UK. He knew she was short of funds so it made sense that she would go for a cheap flight rather than one with one of the more conventional airlines.

Bingo! There was a flight out at nine from Pearson. Then it occurred to him that he had no chance of reaching the airport before it left. On a good day it was a two-and-a-half-hour drive but with the impending snowstorm, it would probably take nearer four hours to get there.

Thumping the door as he left the office, he tried to think straight.

Did I scare her off or was she just not interested? I could have sworn we were getting along OK. What to do now? I can’t lose her. I love her!

He pulled himself up as he realised the depth of his feelings for her, despite only knowing her for a short time. Her innocence and shyness made him want to protect her and the thought that he might never see her again made him go cold with dread.

Jan! She’ll know what’s going on!

Running back out to the truck, he started up and edged along the lane which was now covered in a blanket of white.

I hope to God she got to the airport before this snow came down or she would have been scared and worried about driving in it.

* * * *

In spite of the slippery road, he made it to the store in short time and ran up the external staircase to the apartment above. Banging on the door, he heard Brett’s voice from inside.

“Hold your horses…I’m just coming.”

The door opened and he almost fell inside. Brett stared at him and asked, “What’s got your tail in a spin, mate? You look like shit. You ill or something?”

“Jan? Is she in? I need to talk to her,” Aiden almost shouted at his friend.

Brett indicated the lounge and he went through to see Jan sitting on the sofa, curled up with her e-reader, obviously just out of the shower, judging by the turban on her head.

“Aiden! Hi. What’s up? Is Aly with you?” She peered around him and frowned as she looked up at his face. “What’s happened? Where’s Aly? Is she OK?” Dread crept up her spine at the look on his face.

“She’s gone.”

In a flat voice he explained all that had happened. He didn’t leave anything out, including the incident with the condom the night before. Jan listened with growing horror as she realised that her friend was leaving the country, going back to a place where she would be homeless and without a job. She might also be pregnant, but that was a long shot, so she put that to the back of her mind for now.

Voice thick with unshed tears, Aiden pleaded with his friend’s partner.

“Jan, where would she go? She hardly has any money and she has nowhere to live over there. How will I ever find her?” He groaned in despair.

He didn’t much like her blunt reply.

“Do you want to find her though? Seems she didn’t think you would worry if she left.”

Now he did raise his voice as he shouted, “Of course I want to find her, woman! I love her. Why wouldn’t I want to find her?”

His friend of almost thirty years now stood in front of him and held up his hands.

“Hey, buddy. I know you’re upset but I would appreciate you not talking to my woman in that tone.”

Rubbing his hands through his dark hair, wet with snow, Aiden apologised.

“Sorry, Jan…Brett…I’m just out of my mind with worry. This is madness. I barely knew her two days ago and now I can’t imagine living without her.”

Brett clapped him on the back and gave a shout of laughter. “You’re forgiven, buddy. I know what it’s like when you get caught!”

Jan gave him a dirty look but quickly snatched up her cell phone as she received a message.

“Maybe this is from her.”

The guys waited whilst she read the text message, both impatient to hear what it was.

Another message came in swiftly after the first and then yet another after that. Jan read all three before turning to them to bring them up to speed.

“Well, she takes off at nine. She was convinced that you didn’t really want her and that you just wanted a sub to train. She decided to cut her losses before she got too involved with you. She also said she didn’t want you to ‘deal with’ a pregnancy if that happened. Her car is at the airport waiting for me to collect and sell in lieu of notice for her job. As soon as she has an address she will e-mail me.”

Aiden fell into an armchair, head in his hands as he realised how bad he must have sounded last night when the condom split. She must have thought he would want her to get rid of any baby that might come along as a result of what happened.

Brett looked at the man who had been his friend for most of his life. He had never seen him so bereft. Aiden had always played around a bit, never getting serious with any one woman, and it was obvious that he had fallen head over heels in love with the shy little English girl.

Jan looked across at Aiden and wondered if she should tell him the final part of the text. In it, Aly had confessed that she loved Aiden but didn’t believe he could love her back. It had been the main reason she left. Jan knew that Aly’s self-esteem was low but hadn’t really guessed how low. If she told him, she knew that he would move heaven and earth to find her, but she had to be sure that Aly wanted to be found first.

Erring on the side of caution she walked across and gave Aiden a big hug.

“If I hear any more I promise I’ll let you know. I’ll also ask her to contact you. I can’t promise that she will but I will ask.”

Declining a cup of coffee, Aiden took leave of his friends and headed back home.

* * * *

The house seemed strangely empty when he let himself in, which was ridiculous as he had lived here alone for the past five years without feeling lonely. But in forty-eight hours, Alyssa had already seemed to fill the house with her presence and it seemed cold here now without her.

She had been so thrilled with the house and surroundings. On their walk this morning she had been childlike in her joy in all that she found new. He had enjoyed showing her things she’d never seen before and had been looking forward to walking with her in the snow and across the lake when it froze.

Shaking his head, he headed for the kitchen. The teapot was still sitting on the counter where she’d last used it and in the fridge the muffins he’d baked still sat in their container. Taking them out, he tossed them in the bin, container and all. He didn’t want to be reminded of watching her nibble at the one she ate yesterday, her tongue flicking around her mouth to catch the crumbs as they fell, the look of enjoyment on her face as she confessed that they were her favourite.

Making coffee and taking it through to the lounge he left the lamp off and stood by the window looking out over the lake. Thick snow was now falling, swirling in the wind, settling on the ground leading down to the water. It wouldn’t be long before he and Brett couldn’t work outside and he now dreaded the fact that he would have long days to fill until spring melted the land again.

Finally, he threw away the coffee which had gone cold and headed upstairs. The scent of Alyssa still hung in the air from when she’d showered this morning. Looking in the bedroom she’d had for so short a time, he saw that very little had been taken and was surprised, but secretly a little pleased, that she had left her special quilt.

Pulling it from the bed, he took it into his room and laid it on his own bed, shucked his clothes, and climbed in. The bedside clock said nine fifteen and he knew for certain that she had left him. The ache in his chest felt like a lump of lead and he turned onto his side, pulled her quilt over him and tried to sleep. The scent of the jasmine perfume she always wore surrounded him, a poignant reminder of the one person he now knew he wanted to spend the rest of his days loving and cherishing.

The flight was long and bumpy. By the time they reached London she was overtired and had a thumping headache. Listlessly she collected her case and went through the customs barrier. At the other side, she made for the train station with a view to getting to Southampton, then finding somewhere cheap to live until she found a job.

The train was overcrowded and stuffy. It was raining so the overpowering smell of wet coats filled the air. By the time she arrived in the city of her birth she was at the end of her tether. She was cold, hungry, and so tired she could sleep for a week. But first she had to find somewhere to live.

A short walk from the station in the pouring rain found her at London Road, where she recalled all the estate agents were based. Wet and bedraggled she wondered if any of them would actually be interested in letting her a flat, but a short time later, she was viewing a small one-bed flat, close to the city centre, where the rent was reasonable and the landlord was happy with a year-old reference from her previous letting agent.

Thankfully, the flat was furnished, albeit basically, and all she needed to provide to start with was bed linens and towels.