Hell Inc. (35 page)

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Authors: C. M. Stunich

Tags: #Fantasy

BOOK: Hell Inc.
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I
left her and Diamokina and walked down the hall, fondling the box as
I went. It was only because I was so intent on figuring out how to
open it that I neglected to see him standing in front of me.

I
might have bumped into Levie's broad chest had I been alive, but
instead, I walked right through him. It was disturbing to say the
least. I came out the other side, gasping at the sight of his
beating heart right in front of me. I'd also lost the box. I
stepped back several paces, trying not to let the horror show on my
face.

Levie
turned around and handed the box back to me in silence. I took it
from him slowly and backed another step, almost running over my own
body. He stared down at it sadly, face twisted in pain.

“Ginger,”
he said, his deep voice warming me and giving me an unbearable urge
to throw myself at him. God, I made myself sick sometimes. He
tricked me. He tricked me after I'd trusted him.

“What
do you want, Levie?” I'd meant it to sound menacing, angry, but
it came out more like a pained whisper. What the hell was wrong with
me? He took a step forward, but I didn't want to be any closer,
whether he could touch me or not.

“I'm
sorry.” It was all he said. It was almost enough. I was
tired, scared, and completely out of my league. I needed someone to
lean on, metaphorically speaking, through all of this. I wanted him.
I looked up at his face, the words in the contract burned into my
mind.
Bound together for this life and the next.
I shivered
and turned away.

What
he did was wrong. No, it wasn't just wrong; it was downright creepy.
I turned my head back around slightly and watched him out of the
corner of my eye. He was staring at my body, the corners of his
pulled down in a melancholy frown.

“I
want to forgive you because God knows, I do need help, but I don't
know about all of this, Levie,” I said, standing there feeling
miserable. “You basically tricked me into marrying you, and I
mean, we haven't known each other for that long and all ... ”
Levie stepped forward and gripped my shoulders, leaning down so his
warm breath was against my ear. I was too shocked by the fact that
he was touching me to protest.

“There
is no other choice for me. We do not get to make mistakes in this
department. I get one chance and one chance only.” I gave him
a look, hoping to convey my feelings. I
pushed him away, my hands meeting his warm chest, and turned around.

“Then
why did you waste it on me? You didn't even like me that much.”
But as soon as I said it, I knew that it wasn't true. He did like
me. He just didn't show it in the same way most people did.
At
least he admitted his feelings for you earlier. You haven't even
admitted yours to yourself.

“Stupid
girl.” This was said with a deep affection that I felt down to
my bones. “I've made my decision. I've chosen you. You can
choose to live with me or leave me, it is your decision, but I have
no other. At least give me a chance to help you through this. If
you decide you do not want me, I will leave you alone and you may
live out the rest of this life, and the next, on your own terms.”
My heart, or at least the transparent version of it, leapt in my
chest, and I turned around with a start.

“You
mean that?” I asked suspiciously. I wanted his help with the
mess this life had become, and he was offering it with no strings
attached. Levie shrugged his broad shoulders and unbidden, a memory
of him naked popped into my head. It took only one glance down at my
severed head to snap back into reality, but the decision was already
made. “Okay, you can stay. But no lovey-dovey stuff unless I
say. Got it?” Levie nodded and cast a glance over his
shoulder as Marji and Dia made their way slowly down the hallway.

Marji
was holding her scythe out in front of her, and Dia just looked bored
and lazy, as usual.

“Who
are you?” she spat, distrust clear in her voice.

“He's
with me,” I answered before she decided that Levie needed to
join me face down and headless on the carpet. “He's my, uh,
caseworker.” The word had a strange ring to it now that I knew
the full meaning. Marji nodded and slammed the base of her weapon
into the carpet.

“You
could have told us that you were expecting someone.” I glanced
back at Levie who had his usual scowl plastered across his face. The
two of them were never going to get along. But Marji had brought up
a valid point. I
hadn't
been expecting him.

“How
did you find me?” I asked, trying to draw Levie's attention
away from Dia who was circling him like a shark and licking her lips.
He turned his eyes back to me and stretched his wings.

“You
are my mate.” This was all he said, and it was said with a tone
that made me think he felt I should understand the subtleties behind
it. I raised one eyebrow but decided not to delve any further. I
didn't even want to know. I didn't want to start thinking of him as
a stalker. That would make the whole thing even creepier.

“Can
anyone tell me how this whole ghost thing works?” I asked,
holding up the box. “One minute, I can touch something. The
next, I'm seeing people's beating hearts when I walk through them.
What the hell?” Marji gave me a look that reminded me of
Levie. It was the kind of look that said, 'Why are you so stupid,
haven't you figured that out yet?'

“It's
all about intent. As a Guardian, if you haven't figured that out
yet, it usually means you're dead.” I stared at her and
wondered if she really thought that was an appropriate joke. She
giggled and then stopped when she realized nobody else was joining
in. Marji returned my look with an angry one of her own. “Oh,
come on! You know that a genie only has as much power as its
master.” She tilted her head at Dia for emphasis. “You
think she could summon that many designer shoes for me if you weren't
a powerful Guardian? Puh-lease! I didn't mean any insult, get over
yourself.” Marji threw up her hands and stomped from the room
in a miniature temper tantrum. I looked at Levie, but he wasn't
offering any more information. Rather, he was staring at my corpse
again.

“Stop
that,” I snapped, feeling suddenly protective of the empty
shell. “Marji says this will help.” I held up the box
so that Levie could see, but he looked just as curious as I was to
see what was inside.

“What
is it?” he asked, directing his question towards the kitchen
and the stomping, cabinet slamming Marji.

“It's
a monkey's paw. I bought it a long, long time ago. It's still good,
though.” She went back to her cabinet slamming, ignoring the
fact that there were three unknown strangers standing in her living
room. Levie bristled, his wings raised aggressively and a growl
escaped his throat.

“No.
I will not allow her to use that foul thing.” He stepped
forward, hand extended as if he planned on taking the box from me. I
held it back protectively and looked to Dia for help.

“Marji
says she can't raise her, and I can only do so much in one day.
We're three wishes down, and I haven't even had a nap or a martini.
Give it a shot and if it doesn't work, I'll come up with something.”
As my genie, I thought she could have been a little more supportive
but apparently, it doesn't work that way. I gave Levie a begging
glance. I wanted to trust his judgment in this, but we also needed a
quick fix. I was running out of time.

“You
said you were going to try to renegotiate with your uncle. So unless
you have an alternative ... ?” He sighed and ran a hand
through his hair.

“I
could not locate him and we are short on time. This is why I came to
find you. I was hoping you truly did have another alternative as you
had said. Your genie should be able to help you.” He gave Dia
one of his famous glares. She rolled her shoulders and yawned.

“I
tried. But that idiot elf cut her fucking head off. What do you
want me to do? Ginger's low on magic. We both need time to rest
before I can pull another rabbit out of the proverbial hat, okay?
Just try the damn paw.” Levie looked at me and then nodded
grudgingly. I took it as a yes.

The
box was certainly nicer than the object I found when I opened it. It
stank to high hell and made my nostrils flare, a mistake considering
that just let in more of the fetid meat odor. It was black,
wrinkled, smelt like a dead fish and looked less like a monkey's paw
than what I had expected, but I was trying to take Marji's word for
it. Levie's look of disgust wasn't helping much either.

“Are
you sure this is going to help me? Or am I going to end up in even
more deep shit than I already am because this whole wishing thing is
starting to feel like one big, endless scam.” Marji sauntered
back into the living room, chewing on a granola bar and ignored my
rant. She waved a hand dismissively.

“Just
listen to me. I know what I'm doing. I'm a necromancer.” I
didn't really believe that necromancer equated to good at just about
everything, but I let her think her own thoughts.

“Fine.
Just tell me what to say.” She raised her eyebrows at me.

“How
should I know?” I balked at her.

“You
just said that you knew what you were doing?” She shook her
head at me.

“No.
I know the monkey paw will work. I know it can help you. But I'm
not a wish scribe. The last of those died out several hundred years
ago. Their services weren't in high demand. Go figure.” I
scowled at her and turned back to Levie.

“I
will assist you. May I have a writing implement and a piece of
paper?” Marji frowned and spit a chocolate chip into her hand.
She looked at the wrapper on the granola bar and then tossed it into
a wastebasket at her feet.

“You're
not very well trained but yeah, I guess you must have some experience
from being on the job.”

“Wow,
Marji. In our short time together, did I ever tell you how
comforting you can be?” She smiled at me. “That wasn't
a compliment.” She shrugged again, and I resisted an urge to
shake her. Dia sat quietly and sipped some more wine, offering
nothing in the way of words of wisdom. It was probably a good thing
since I didn't know how much more I could take.

“Fine.
I'll get the pen and paper, but if I were you, I'd have the genie do
it.” I ignored her and studied the mass of dried meat while I
waited. I noticed the monkey's paw had only two intact fingers.
That meant just two chances to get this right.
Ticktock, Ginger,
ticktock.
I touched the
withered black flesh reverently. A contract with the Devil, a Genie,
and now this. Oh well, you know what they say: third time's a charm.

Marji
was taking an inordinate amount of time locating stationery, and the
silence in the room was becoming uncomfortable. I cleared my throat
and tried to make small talk.

“So,
what happened to the sphinx?” Levie frowned and shrugged. More
silence. Finally, Marji came back down the hall and slapped a pad of
paper and a ballpoint pen against Levie's chest.

“Can
you hurry this up? I'm supposed to play bridge at a friend's house
tonight.” Levie scowled and snatched the items from her. He
sat down on one of her black bar stools and began to scribble. I
looked at the couch longingly and concentrated on it.
I
just want to sit down.
Dia
interrupted my thoughts with a rather raucous belch and licked the
cocktail olive that she'd pulled out of her new drink. I narrowed my
eyes at her.

“Do
you have a drinking problem? I sure fucking hope not because the
last thing I need is a drunk genie to babysit.” She hiccuped
and gestured at me with her martini glass.

“Don't
be ridiculous. I'm perfectly fine.” She sloshed a mouthful of
booze onto her heaving, orange breasts and hiccuped again. I rolled
my eyes and reached a hand up to rub my forehead. It smelt like
rotten meat, and I ended by dry heaving again. Marji chuckled.

“I
told you being dead sucks. You never really realize how much
vomiting helps certain situations.” Levie was doing his best
to ignore the three of us, but I could see from the tension in his
jaw that he was annoyed. I hoped most of it wasn't reserved for me.

“Monkey
paws are notoriously cruel. I beg of you ladies, please, be quiet so
that I may concentrate.”

“Ooooh!
Ooooh!” Dia exclaimed, turning and balancing her ribcage on
the back of the couch. “Don't forget to specify that her head
is reconnected
before
her soul snaps back into place.” I felt my lip twitch
involuntarily. This was so not going to work.

“Why
can't I use my Hell Inc. wishes?” Levie turned around in the
chair and tapped the table with the pen.

“I
am sorry, Ginger, but we would need my uncle's help with that. As of
right now, you are in contractual limbo.” He watched me for a
long time, and I felt the force of his gaze like a weight. How did I
feel about him? I needed to admit to myself that I was head over
heels. That was the first step. The second step was coming to terms
with what he had done. I had signed the contract though. I could've
read it. I'd had plenty of chances to do so. That, at least, was my
fault. But I still wasn't going to breed little demon babies. That
was never going to happen. Never.

Levie
turned back around and resumed his writing. I meandered around my
body and approached the love seat. I stared at it for several
moments and imagined how soft and relaxing it would feel to sit down.
When I tried, I fell right through it. Dia and Marji both laughed
hysterically, and I avoided looking at Levie. How embarrassing. I
gave up and stayed sitting partially in the couch. At least my head
was sticking out as well as my arms, clutching the monkey's paw.

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