Healing Gabe (Last Hangman MC Book 3) (11 page)

CHAPTER 13

Viv

I wake up with a start, hearing heavy footsteps come upstairs. I freeze and hold my breath. I set the picture on the comforter and grab my old baseball bat and hide to the side of the door ready to swing at whoever is here.

The door slowly opens and I’m just about to strike when the person talks. “Viv?”

“What the fuck are you doing here, Gabe?” I say rather loudly, startling him.

“For fuck’s sake, will you stop trying to give me a fucking heart attack? What the fuck are you doing with a baseball bat?” He turns around and glares at me, but it is quickly replaced with compassion. “You’ve been crying.”

“I’m fine,” I say leaning the bat against the wall and walk back to the bed. “What are you doing here?” He joins me on the bed. Not what I was expecting, it seems like our morning fight is long forgotten.

“I was driving to your place, saw your truck parked outside here and wanted to make sure you’re okay. What are you doing here and why have you been crying?” He tries to hold my hand but I pull it away.

“Why were you going to my place?” I scoot further on to the bed as much as I can, not wanting to be too close to him.

“I’ll answer your question when you answer mine.” He scoots to the end of the bed and leans against it, facing me in my childhood bed.

I sigh and look in the direction of the picture that’s lying between us. He picks it up and smiles sadly. “I’m sorry you lost them all.” he says softly.

“Me too.” I quickly wipe my fresh tears.

“I wanted to check on you and make sure you were okay.” He looks up at me with his big hazel eyes.

“Right, considering how this morning turned out, I didn’t expect to see you ever again.” I cross my arms over my chest.

“Don’t move.” He gets up, kisses my forehead and goes back downstairs.
Where the fuck has he gone?
I don’t have to wait long because less than 5 minutes later, he’s back with two bags.

“What’s all that?”

“As I was saying, I was going to your place to spend the evening with you and make sure you were okay. I picked up your favorite food, well, I hope they’re still your favorite. I got some drinks and thought we could have a quiet night in at yours. Obviously, the location has changed but whatever, we’ll do it here.” He shrugs and places a dish towel on the bed and putting several containers of mac and cheese with hot dog bits, lasagne, mini rice balls, mini pizzas and tiramisu. He follows these with a six pack of cold beer. He does know me well.

“How in the hell did you remember all this?” I look up at him, confused as we’d had only one dinner years ago for mine and Annie’s birthday.

“I remember a little someone who ate one of this all by herself and then stole a couple of slices of my pizza and my beers.” He chuckles and I can’t help but smile.

“I’m sorry about what I said this morning.” I bite my lip.

“Don’t be. We were both upset and said things we didn’t mean. I had time to think about what you said and I’d probably feel the same way if I were you.” I look at him, mouth open, a mini pizza halfway to my mouth, stunned that he is basically admitting I was right and he was wrong. “Don’t even dare tease me about it or I swear I’ll tickle the shit out of you.” He glares at me and smirks.

“Duly noted.” I smile softly and take a bite, mumbling under my breath. “Can’t believe you admitted you were wrong.”

“I heard that.” He chuckles and takes a bite from his lasagne.

“Not even sorry.” I grin innocently and dig into the mac and cheese, moaning as I chew.
It’s so fucking good.
I could live off of mac and cheese.

“Could you not? Unless you want to be my dessert.” He smirks, the scar in his cheek making a dimple, and waggles his eyebrows.

“Don’t start.” I smirk and flip him off. “It’s so good. Here, try it.” I get a fork full and shove it in his mouth. I grin innocently.

As suspected, he moans as he eats his bite. “Okay, you were right. It’s good.”

“No, it’s not good; it’s fucking-amazing-and-the-best-mac-and-cheese-I’ve-ever-had good. What is wrong with you?” I look at him troubled and he bursts out laughing.

“I forgot how funny you can be.” He smiles at me fondly. “And you haven’t tried my mac and cheese yet.” He winks.

“Right, because you can cook?” I raise my eyebrow at him and stuff my face with more cheesy goodness.

“I’ve had to raise Nicole and that kid is fucking picky, I had to learn how to cook what she liked exactly how she liked it. It wasn’t easy and I burned a lot of meals, but in the end she said I was making food as good as our mom.” He smiles sadly. I feel for him. We’ve lost our parents too young. “I’ll have to cook for you some day.” he says with meaning. I look up at him, stunned.

“What?” He looks at me confused.

“Nothing, I just wasn’t expecting that.” I shrug, not sure what to say. The fact that he stills wants to spend time with me after my nervous breakdown this morning and telling him to go fuck himself, is rendering me speechless.

“I’m full of surprises.” He gives me one of his full on dimple smiles and winks at me.

“That you are.” I smile softly and throw a mini rice ball at him. He catches it in his mouth and smirks. “Nice throw.” he says around a mouthful.

“So, what would you cook for me? What’s your speciality?”

“Anything you want Doll. Let’s see. I make a mean grilled cheese sandwich.” I raise my eyebrow at him. “What?”

“I was expecting something a bit more elaborate.”

“You haven’t tried it yet so shut up.” He chuckles. “I can cook whatever you want. I make a good chicken stew from what Nicole tells me. Whenever she comes back home from college I make her one if I’m home.”

“Alright, I’ll have to wait and see then.” I grin innocently, stealing some of his lasagne.

“Food thief. Remember that day?” He laughs.

“No clue what you’re talking about.” I grin innocently, obviously lying.

“Really? So you don’t remember spending half a day locked in my kitchen while I was trying to reassure Annie that everything would be okay, that no one would hurt us and when we came to get you, all the food was gone?”

“I was hungry!” I exclaim.

“I noticed.” He chuckles. “So you did try my cooking already.” He smiles.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t cooked for me so it doesn’t count.” I shrug smiling, finishing my mac and cheese.

“I love a woman who can eat food, real food and not be ashamed.” He smirks, letting his eyes travel down my body.

“Oi, eyes up here Gabe. And food is too good to fucking diet, that’s why someone invented gyms. I love food too much. Salads are good from time to time but they aren’t filling.” I smile and pop a mini rice ball in my mouth and chew on it.

“Good to know.” He looks at me, longingly and sighs.

“What’s wrong?” I look at him confused.

“Nothing. It’s just…it’s the first time I’m feeling something since Annie. It’s totally different than what I felt for her. I’ve always had a soft spot for you Viv, ever since we met. I didn’t think you were interested in me and Annie was, so I started to date her, but there was something about you that’s always intrigued me and slowly I fell for you. I should have ended things with Annie, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to break her heart and I knew that if I did, you wouldn’t want to see me ever again. I made a big fucking mistake going out with her in the first place and then staying with her, it cost her her life and me, you. I wish I was man enough back then to own up to how I felt and told her the truth. What I meant when I mentioned your eyes this morning, is that whenever I dream or have a nightmare about Annie, it’s her, but with your eyes. I don’t know why, it’s so confusing. What I feel for you is much stronger than anything I’ve ever felt before. It scares me to have these feelings and even more so to express them because I know you don’t feel the same way. I’m scared that if we get too close, someone will try to hurt you and you’ll be ripped away from me, and I can’t handle that. Ever since you came back, I’ve been a fucking mess. I don’t know how to deal with my feelings. It’s killing me to imagine someone was after you, scaring you all those years and now that you’re back, I’m scared they will go back after you. Things have been fucked up this past year. But I’m even more scared of not touching you.” He looks up at me and I have no idea what to say, everything he said after telling me that he fell for me years ago has gone over my head.

“I…” I swallow hard. “You fell for me?”

“Yes, long ago. I’ve never moved on from those feelings, but I can’t give into them.” he says sadly.

“Why did you date Annie then? Why not tell me how you felt? And why would you tell me that now and then tell me you can’t fucking give into them? Seriously! I’ve been in love with you since the first time we met. I’ve been going from place to place always having you in the back of my mind, never able to move on because of those feelings I had for you, kicking myself for never telling you how I felt even though I came so close so many times, all that for you to tell me twelve fucking years later you feel that way for me?” I tell him, fucking pissed. “I’ve lived in fear that someone would attack me for the past twelve years. I’m done living in fear. I didn’t know why I came back here but now I do, I wanted to be with you all along, Gabe. I don’t know why I still do after you keep playing those stupid fucking mind games with me, but I still do,” I say softly, frustrated with him and myself.

“We don’t have to, but it’s the reality of how fucked up our lives are. Do you have any idea of what has happened these past couple of months?”

I shake my head. “No.”

He sighs. “Ayden was kidnapped by a fucking psycho. Charline nearly died at the hands of Brian, Al-“

“From the Kings?” I look at him, scared.

“Yes. You know him?”

I nod. “He was around when I was forced to be around them. He was still a prospect at the time but he was a fucking psycho. He was always up to go after people for payback and according to Jared, he was good at it.” I frown.

“He’s dead now. Aleck killed him, nearly died in the process too.”

“Good riddance. What happened to Aleck?”

“He was shot by one of the Kings’ prospects, Charline killed the guy and saved Aleck and myself.”

“I’m glad she did,” I say softly.

“Me too.” He sighs and moves the empty containers to the side and tugs on my arm, pulling me in to his arms. “I missed you. I missed having you in my life. It wasn’t the same anymore, wasn’t right.”

“It wasn’t the same without you around either. I had a mad crush on you the first time I saw you. I had noticed you around town for a while but was too scared to talk to you. I was devastated when you picked Annie over me.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” He lifts my chin so I’m forced to look at him.

“Because she had fallen for you. I wanted her to be happy and maybe have a chance to get out of this grave Trent had been digging for us.” I sigh.

“Do you think that if things had happened differently between all three of us that she’d still be alive?” He kisses my forehead.

“Trent wasn’t the type of man who’d take no for an answer, especially when it would go against what he wanted and slow him down. Annie and I not doing what he wanted us to do was putting a huge dent in his plans to make the biggest MC in Louisiana. He was too hungry for power and money that no matter what, he’d eliminate whoever was in his way, us included. You being with her might have sped up the process, but in the end, the outcome would have been the same. I’d have had the same fate as her too.” He strokes my hair and I kiss his chest.

“How did you get out? What was your life like?” He caresses the small of my back, drawing random patterns.

“The day of Annie’s funeral, I managed to sneak a bag out of Trent’s house with a few of my belongings, what I’d need the most. I asked Cabe to help me out to take Trent down and well you know what happened that day. That night, as I was leaving, Cabe followed me on his bike and stopped me. He gave me 10K and fake papers and ID. I left Louisiana and prayed that they wouldn’t find me. A couple of times I saw them around where I was staying. I guess Trent had their charters keep an eye on me to scare me. It worked sometimes but I moved whenever it was getting too dangerous. I worked in bars, diners, restaurants, anywhere I could to get money. That’s pretty much my life for the past twelve years. As fucked up as it was, I wouldn’t change it, I got to travel the world.” I smile softly.