Authors: Lisa Plumley
âYou will go willingly?'
âWhen my king makes an order, who am I to refuse? I am a loyal subject of our king, regardless of what Harald Haraldson might say.' Ash gave a crooked smile, but his eyes were deadly serious. âThe hour is late. We leave at first light.'
He rapidly gave orders for Valdar's things to be placed in his bed cabinet and for his men to be treated with respect.
âYou should have said something when you suspected that something had gone awry,' Kara said when Rurik had led Valdar off and they were alone in the hall. Her mind whirled. Ash had deliberately kept things from her. âYou should have confided in me about this.'
âWhy worry you about something which might not come to pass?'
âWe're far from ready if Harald Haraldson should decide to attack Jaarlshiem. The grain and wool will need to be moved.' Kara pressed her hands together to keep them from trembling. âIt was wrong of you.'
âAnd have you fret and use it as an excuse?'
Kara bit her lip. âYou should have told me.'
âHarald Haraldson will not attack here. He wouldn't dare. Not with my sell-swords guarding it. And he covets this estate. He doesn't want to lay waste to it.'
âHow do you know?' Kara glanced at the door. Suddenly Ash's insistence of a guard and men seemed less extravagant. âHe could be on his way right now. Things need to be properly stored. We could be facing a long siege.'
âThink with your head, Kara, instead of giving way to blind panic.' Ash slammed his hand down on the table. âMy uncle wants this hall above all things and believes he will get it through the king. It makes no sense for him to attack if he has taken my ship. He needs to remain in Sand if he wishes to influence the king.'
Kara put her hand over her mouth. Ash was correct. If Harald Haraldson wanted to influence the king, he needed to be in Sand. Ash did know what he was doing, but it didn't make her any happier or feel any less used.
âYou weren't sure which way your uncle would move. It is why you brought your men, rather than fearing any threat from Valdar. It is why you have been training them so hard. You expect war. You have been using me like a counter in a game of tafl.'
âWar happens whether you expect it or not. It is best to be prepared.' Ash shrugged and began to rearrange the pieces on the tafl board, concentrating on them, rather than looking Kara in the face. He could sense Kara slipping away from him. This afternoon she had been his, but... It hurt that she refused to understand that he was acting to protect her. âSometimes you have to wait for the other person in the game to make his move.'
âWho do you think you are playing this game against? The king?'
âMy uncle,' Ash said, putting the tafl piece down. Kara deserved to know the truth now that his uncle had acted. Once she knew, she would see that he had done the right thing. âMy uncle seeks me banished or dead. He wants this estate. He is using the king as his instrument of destruction.'
Her face showed her dismay. âYou told me it was all resolved. The king gave you permission to depart. I believed you. It was why I went with you. You used me, Ash. That is unforgivable. You should have trusted me. What is a marriage without trust? Was your promise to become a farmer simply mouthing words?'
He winced. In seeking to protect her, he had lost her trust.
âI want to be with you and our son. I am willing to try, but I have to do this first. I am used to operating on my own.'
âThe last time you asked for permission to do something first, you were gone for seven years.'
âIt won't be that long. I've taken all the steps necessary. The king did give me permission to return to Jaarlshiem. Until my uncle chose his move, I couldn't counter him.' He forced a smile, but knew it wouldn't fool her. âI am an excellent tafl player. You know that. I mean to win.'
Her eyes turned sad. âYou should have said something when you first suspected.'
âWhat could you have done?' He put his hands on her shoulders. âI know what I am doing. It has been my life for the past six years. Let me prove to you that I am worthy.'
She shrugged off his hands and her eyes flashed. âYou leave for Sand at first light. You won't be here to put things right.'
âEveryone is prepared.' He struggled to understand her hurt. He knew what he was doing. He would return as soon as he could. âYou'll be safe here.'
âSometimes safety is an illusion. You showed me that with Rurik.' She dipped her head and he could only see the crown of braids. âI thought Rurik was safe with Gudrun and look what happened.'
âLike you, I'd give my life for our son.'
Her mouth became an O.
âValdar wanted me in chains, but I suspect he gave me the option for the sake of our son and you,' Ash continued. âI suppose I should be grateful that he likes my son. It would not do for him to see his father escorted out in chains.'
âValdar isn't like that. He is your friend.' Her hand played with the chain on her waist. âIt is why we first became close. He was able to tell Rurik stories about you.'
âHe was my friend once, but he fell in love with my wife. He'll take pleasure in seeing me humiliated. It is why my uncle persuaded the king that he was the perfect man for the job. Why he wasn't at court that morning. He is my uncle's man now.'
âWill your uncle win if no one pleads for you?' Kara began to pace the hall. Her skirt swished, revealing her trim ankles, but Ash admired the steel in her backbone more.
âMy uncle will have put it about that I am a Viken spy.'
She stopped mid-stride. âAre you a spy?'
âI was a sell-sword who fights in the open, not a spy who hides in the shadows. I certainly never betrayed my country. I never preyed on Raumerike ships and I would never do so.'
He waited, willing her to understand.
âI believe you, my husband.'
Tension rushed from Ash's shoulders. Kara believed him. She had claimed him. He gathered her in his arms. âIt is a start.'
A tiny frown creased her forehead. âCan you prove it?'
âShould it come to it, I believe I can. My men will vouch for me.'
âWho would believe the word of a sell-sword? Everyone knows they will say anything for money.' She stuffed her hand in her mouth. âThat sounds dreadful, Ash. But you need others to support you. You can't do this alone.'
âMy uncle will overreach. He needs a small push, but he will do it.'
âWould you give up your man if it turns out your uncle is correct and your ship did attack?'
Ash considered Helgi. His oarsman was cautious to the point of inaction. He only attacked if he knew he had superior numbers. The ship had barely enough men to get upriver. Ash had made sure of it. They had not been the aggressors. He knew this in his gut. âIt would go against Helgi the Short's nature to attack.'
âThat isn't what I asked! Would you be the one to strike him dead if he turns against you? The king is sure to ask you. Hesitating will only give credence to our enemies.'
He tilted his head. âOur? Since when did my enemies become yours? A man doesn't abandon his friends or the men who trust him, Kara. Helgi did not do this.'
âNot even to save himself?'
âEspecially not then. I'll prove Helgi's innocence and my own, as well.'
âAttacking you through this ship means Rurik's inheritance is in jeopardy. I can't allow that to happen. Promise me you won't put your friend above our son.'
A pang went through Ash. He wanted to be more important than Rurik. He shook his head in disbelief. When had he started to be jealous of his son? He wanted Kara to trust him.
âI want the truth, Kara. If Helgi has disobeyed my direct orders, then I will be the one to draw a sword and strike his head from his shoulders. But a man should be deemed innocent until proven guilty. I will defend him until I have proof otherwise.' He hoped Kara believed it. If he couldn't convince Kara, what chance did he have of convincing the king?
Silently he prayed to any god who might be listening that he would be able to prove it and he would not be the one to end Helgi's life. He owed Helgi far too many debts. âIf he has betrayed me, I will not hesitate. I haven't in the past. Let me go.'
âTo do what? Leave and not come back?'
âTo fight for us both.' He lifted her chin so he could stare directly into her eyes.
She slammed her fists together. âI will return with you. You owe me this, Ash.'
He stared at her, dumbfounded. Hadn't Kara listened to a word he had said? He had made arrangements for her. âYou can stay here, safe and unmolested. No one will doubt Rurik's claim to this place. I will make sure of it. It will be better for you to look after Rurik here.'
âRurik goes to Sand, as well. We all go or none of us goes.'
He stared at her open-mouthed. âYou are going to risk Rurik in Sand? Why? He is safest here!'
âHe will be safer with you than being left here, and there is no one I will leave him with, not after what happened the last time. There, I've given you an excuse if anyone asks, but I want us to be together as a family. We face this together. United against the world.'
Ash gulped hard. Kara wanted to come with him. Once, he'd longed to hear those words. Now they made it worse. This wasn't about proving his worth as a warrior, but saving his family. He had to outthink his uncle and he couldn't do that if he was worried about Kara and Rurik. Here at Jaarlshiem he could leave enough men to protect them. In Sand anything could happen to them.
For the past seven years, he had only had himself to worry about and now he was terrified for Kara and Rurik. He wanted to be able to protect them, not just because he had a duty towards them but because he cared about them.
âYour offer is unexpected.' He ran his hand through his hair, wondering how he could stop her without destroying this new fragile bond that had grown between them in the last few days. And he selfishly wanted her there with him, which was wrong. If he was truly the man he wanted to be, he'd make her stay where she was safe.
âUnexpected or unwelcome?' she asked sharply.
âI'm used to being on my own. Worrying about myself and no one else. I have everything under control.'
She slipped her hand through his arm. âYou are not on your own any longer.'
Ash's stomach knotted. Her saying that made it worse. The walls pressed in on him, making it difficult to breathe. He had planned everything. Kara was supposed to want to stay out of harm's way. She wasn't supposed to volunteer to come with him. âIt could be a trap. My uncle might try to harm you or Rurik to get at me. Think of how that will make me feel.'
âYou proclaimed that everything was in hand.' Her mouth turned mulish. âIf it is safe enough for you, it is safe enough for Rurik.'
âIt is different for me. I know the risks. You can stay here. I will leave my men to guard you.' He ran his hand down the length of her arm. âI want to know you are safe. Do this for me.'
Her lashes swept down, hiding her expression. âYou asked for the opportunity to show me that you have changed. I will give you that opportunity. Will you let me come and bring Rurik?'
Ash brushed his lips against hers and tried to dispel his sudden sense of panic. He wasn't a better man. He was a selfish one who would take every opportunity to be with his wife and child. The fact tore at his insides. âAfter this afternoon, I've no wish to let you go.'
âThen you agree. I'll come.'
âHow can I stop you?' He bowed his head. The walls of the hall seemed to bear down on him, reminding him of his duty and how he'd failed before. Far more was at stake this time. There would be no second chance to get it right. âI need to see my men and make sure all is ready, including a cart for you and Rurik.'
* * *
Kara paced her chamber. She had retired for the night after she had given up waiting for Ash to return from his making arrangements for their departure. Her mind spun with all the worries about the future. Ash was going again and she had no guarantee when he might return. Or if. And had he truly meant his words about becoming a farmer? Or had that been a sop?
After giving a soft knock, Ash entered the room. âValdar and his men are bedded down. Safe and secure. And all arrangements are in hand. We leave at first light.'
âWas it that difficult?'
âIt took some doing.' Ash ran his hand through his hair. âHe doesn't know you are coming yet.'
She stared at him. âIf you hope to use your power of persuasions with me, I will warn you my mind is made up. I am going.'
He shook his head. âI know enough about you not to try that. Less chance of objections from Valdar. I wanted to spend tonight with you, rather than countering his arguments. I had to show him the fortifications so that he could test you would be properly guarded.'
âThen he is not entirely your uncle's creature.'
âYou have a point, Kara. You are far more than a pretty face.'
Kara frowned at the way the warmth curled about her insides at his hooded look. She wasn't going to fall into bed with him, just yet. She wanted to make sure he understood her terms first. âI'm sure Valdar will see the necessity and he would far rather I travelled with him and you, instead of making the journey on my own.'
âStubborn. Just the way I like you.' He moved closer. âDo I have to provoke another fight before you will kiss me?'
âI'm finished with fighting you.'
He lifted her chin. âYou will see, Kara, I will prove I'm worthy of you. A few short weeks and we will return.'
Her heart panged. The echo of seven years ago rang loudly in his words.
âIt will take as long as it takes.' Her voice trembled on the last word. She screwed her eyes up tightly, silently cursing. âI know that, Ash. I have accepted it.'