Gunz and Roses (23 page)

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Authors: Keisha Ervin

BOOK: Gunz and Roses
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“I need to go pee.” She tapped him in the chest.

“No, you don't, Gray.”

“How you gon' tell me what I gotta do?” she yelled.

“ 'Cause you just got done peeing two minutes ago in the lobby restroom.”

“Oh . . . I sure did.” She giggled. “Arggggggh, excuse me.” She burped then cracked up laughing.

“Come on and lay down.” Truth placed her down onto the bed.

Gray was so out of it that she couldn't even take off her own clothes.

“Gunz, take off my shoe.”

“What did you say?” Truth asked, standing in front of the bed.

“You heard me. Take off my shoe.” She propped her right leg up in the air.

The bottom of her dress fell up above her waist. Truth could see the white silk lining of her panties. Her body had changed since back in high school. Gray's thighs and legs were succulent and firm.

“Baby, what you waiting on?” she whined, running her fingers through her hair.

Truth realized in his heart that what he was about to do was wrong, but he couldn't hold back the urge to kiss Gray. If she thought he was Gunz, he'd happily play along.

With her foot in his hand, he slowly undid the strap on her heel. Gray had the prettiest feet. She always kept them polished and pedicured. Truth took her pinky toe in his mouth and sucked.

“Oooooh, Gunz,” she moaned.

“You like that, baby?”

“Yes.”

Truth lovingly placed a trail of kisses from her feet down to the inner part of her thigh. The print of her pussy was staring him right in the face. He had to get a taste. Truth set the seat of her panties aside. Closing his eyes, he placed his nose up to the lips of her pussy and inhaled. He would forever cherish the scent. Truth swirled his tongue around the bud of her clit. It instantly hardened, letting him know she was aroused.

“Gunz, I love you.” She rubbed the top of Truth's head.

“I love you too.”

 

“Ahhhhhh,” Gray groaned when she woke up the next morning.

She could hear the sound of bacon crackling downstairs. The smell made her sick. The question was, who was at her house cooking breakfast? Covering her mouth, she tried to prevent herself from throwing up. Unable to suppress the chunks of food in the back of her throat, she ran to the master bathroom. She barely made it to the toilet before pink vomit spewed from her mouth and slid down her chin.

Gray placed her hands on the toilet to balance herself. The cold tile from the marble floor caused a chill to run up her spine. After throwing up once more, she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Nauseated beyond belief, she slowly got up from the floor and made her way over to the sink. Gray turned on the faucet. A mixture of cold and hot water poured into her hands. Bending over, she splashed her face. The warm water soothed her skin.

“I didn't know you were up,” she heard a voice say from behind.

Scared out of her mind, Gray jumped and turned around.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.” Truth grabbed a fresh towel from the rack.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, confused by his presence.

“What do you mean, silly?” He took the towel and patted her face.

Gray grabbed his hands and stopped him. “No, for real. What are you doing here?” This time she asked in a tone that let him know she wasn't playing.

“You don't remember, do you?” he asked with a quizzical expression on his face.

“Remember what?”

“I spent the night. We slept together, Gray.”

“What you mean, like slept in the bed wit' each other?”

“No,
slept together
, slept together,” he stressed.

“No, we didn't.” She laughed.

Truth stood frozen with a deranged look on his face. “What's so funny?”

“You.” Gray turned back to face the mirror. “You know damn well we didn't sleep together.”

“Why would I lie to you about something like that?”

“You're serious?” She turned back around.

“Yes, you told me you loved me.”

Gray was mortified. Had she really slept with Truth? For the first time since she woke up, she looked down at herself. She was still in the dress from the night before, except the airy sensation between her legs let her know her panties were missing. Gray rushed past Truth and into her room. The bed was a mess. The white Victoria's Secret panties she wore had been thrown in the middle of the floor. Truth's clothes were too.

“Are you gonna be okay?” Truth questioned as she sat on the edge of her bed.

“Yeah, I'm just in shock. I don't remember a thing.”

“Well, that makes me feel good,” he stated in a sarcastic tone.

“Oh no, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that.” She patted his hand.

“It's cool. You enjoyed yourself last night; I promise.”

“That's good to know,” she stated mockingly. “Did we use a condom?”

“No. You said you didn't want me to,” Truth lied.

“Really?” Gray asked, unsure.

“Gray, why would I lie to you?”

“It's just all so weird.” She massaged her temples.

“Look, everything is going to be okay.” He bent down and caressed her face. “Trust me. Now, I cooked breakfast, so once you get cleaned up, come downstairs and eat.”

“Truth, we need to talk.”

“Shhhh.” He placed his index finger up to her lips. “Not right now. Let's just enjoy the moment.”

Gray could see how happy he was. She didn't want to hurt him, but eventually it would have to be done. She would never see him in a romantic way. She hoped when the time was right for her to tell him, he'd understand.

 

It was one of those days where everything seemed to go wrong. From the minute Gunz woke up, it had been one bad thing after another. Watts called and said that a shipment was lost; then Devin called and said she didn't feel good and was too afraid to be alone, so Gunz got out of bed and went to get her. Since then, he'd regretted his decision. If she wasn't nagging him, she was complaining.

Gunz didn't know how he would be able to put up with her for eighteen more years. On top of that, his mother called with news that his father was in the hospital. She wouldn't tell him what for, though, over the phone. Gunz pulled up to Barnes-Jewish Hospital with Devin in tow. She refused to stay back at his house. After stopping at the receptionist's desk, they hopped on an elevator to the triage center. Gunz's mother, grandmother, and uncles were already there.

“Gavin.” His grandmother rushed over to him.

“What's going on?”

“Uh-uh, who is this?” She stepped in front of him and stared Devin up and down.

“Hi. I'm Devin.” She stuck out her hand for a shake.

“Hi. . . . Where is Gray?”

“At home, I guess. Can we talk about that later?” Gunz spoke, aggravated.

“Sorry. Look, sweetie, I'm not tryin' to be rude, but this is a family matter. Do you mind stepping outside?”

“No problem.” Devin faked a smile.

Once she was out of the room, Gunz's grandmother sat him down. He stared over at his father. He was asleep, with tubes in his nose and arms. He looked completely different from the last time he'd seen him at the barbecue. His skin was dry and ashy. He looked like he'd lost over fifteen pounds. For the first time, Gunz allowed himself to feel sorry for him.

“What's wrong wit' him? Why he look like that?” he asked.

“Gavin, your father is dying.”

“What?” He turned with a bewildered look on his face.

“You father has full blown AIDS.”

“I wanted to tell you, sweetie.” His mother placed her hand on his shoulder.

Gunz didn't know what to say. Was he supposed to cry, or show some type of emotion? He'd just gotten used to the idea of his father being back around, and now he was about to taken away again, this time for good.

“Why you ain't tell me?”

“He didn't want us to.”

“So that's what we do now in this family—keep secrets?”

“Don't be mad at them, Gavin,” his father spoke in a raspy voice.

“Joseph, you need to rest.” His mother stroked his hand.

“I know, ma.”

“I'm sorry it took me so long to get here.” Gray rushed into the room.

Gunz spun around in his seat and looked in her direction. He couldn't have been more surprised to see her. It had been over a month since their last encounter. It felt good to see her face; being around her made him feel relaxed.

For Gray, all of the feelings she'd been trying to suppress came flooding back. She quickly looked the other way.

“Gray, it's so good to see you.” His mother hugged her.

“What is she doing here?” Gunz asked.

“Uh-uh, rudeness.” Vivian wagged her finger at him.

“What?”

“I told them to invite her,” Joseph spoke up.

“How are you feeling, Mr. Marciano?” Gray asked, ignoring Gunz.

“Okay, I guess.”

“Gunz, can I talk to you for a second?” Devin asked, reentering the room.

For some reason, Gray was shocked to see her. Her eyes immediately darted to her stomach. She wasn't showing yet.

“Uh, yeah.” He got up to leave.

He was almost happy to. The tension in the room was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“What is it?”

“I just wanted to know was everything all right?” she asked, sincerely worried.

“No . . . look here.” He went into his pocket. “Why don't you go on home?”

“Why, 'cause she's here?” she shot, ready to go off.

“No, because I'm askin' you to. Besides, you said you wasn't feeling good. Don't you think you need to go home and rest?” Gunz tried to reason.

Devin wanted to object, but she couldn't argue his point.

“All right.” She took the money. “Will you at least call me when you get home?”

“I can't make you no promises. I'll see what I can do.”

Devin looked into his troubled eyes and attempted to kiss his lips, but Gunz wasn't feeling it, so instead he turned his face and gave her his cheek. Devin was devastated. If only Gunz could see how much she adored him. Instead of reacting negatively to his dismissal of her kiss, she simply gave him a slight smile and pressed the DOWN button on the elevator.

Once she was gone, Gunz went back into the room.

“Can you all give me and Gavin a minute alone?” Joseph requested.

Everybody obliged his wish and stepped out into the hallway. Gunz pulled up a seat next to his bed.

“You know Gray is sure sweet on you.” Joseph tried to smile.

“How you know?”

“ 'Cause every time you walk out of the room her eyes turn gray. And when you return, they turn blue again.”

“That's impossible.” Gunz waved him off.

“How do you know, smart guy? You ever seen the color of her eyes when you're not in the room?”

“Hmm.” He rubbed his chin.

“You know, I know we haven't had the best relationship, but I really want the best for you. I don't want you to be like me, Gavin. My life has been a mess. I didn't have anybody and it was my entire fault. I pushed everyone away.

“Now, I don't know what's going on wit' you and Gray, but I seen how happy you were with her. Don't let your pride hinder you, son. You'll regret it in the end. Believe me; I know. Every time I see you and your mother, I regret my decisions. You all mean the world to me. And I know it might not mean much to you, but I was at Adriana's funeral.”

Gunz looked at his father, shocked.

“I attended the burial. I saw you holding your mother.”

Tears slipped from his eyes as he thought back on the day.

“Why didn't you let us know you were there?” Gunz asked, confused.

“Y'all were going through enough and I didn't want to make it worse. Besides, you didn't need to see me like that. I was a mess.”

“And here I was thinking all these years that you didn't care.”

“I've always loved you, son. I love you more than you know. The problem was that I didn't know how to love myself.”

W
henever you look at me . . .

 

Adele, “Cold Shoulder”

Chapter Fifteen

F
or the past three months, Gray had been feeling nauseated and fatigued. Every ten minutes she had to pee, and her breasts had even been tender and swollen, but she didn't pay it any mind because her period was still coming; however, during the third month of her symptoms, her period didn't make its monthly visit. That's when Gray became worried.

Now she sat alone in a state of shock. Her mind couldn't comprehend what she was seeing. There she was, sitting on top of the toilet seat with a white stick in her hand. The pregnancy test confirmed that she was indeed pregnant. Truth would be ecstatic to learn the news. They'd been spending a lot of time together.

The problem was Gray didn't know how she felt about it. She'd always envisioned herself being a mother; she just never pictured the father being Truth. They weren't even a couple.

“What am I gonna do?” she spoke out loud to herself as she stood up and faced the mirror.

Gray was the epitome of grace and beauty. Her hair, makeup, and clothes were flawless as usual. People around her thought her life was picture perfect and that she had it going on. If only they knew that she felt sad and worn out on the inside. Plus, thoughts of what Gunz would think when he found out tormented her mind.

Why the fuck do you even care? He got a baby on the way too,
her conscience screamed.

Gray felt stupid and confused. The only thing she could do was gaze off into space and shake her head; that was, until her assistant, Breann, buzzed her office. Gray quickly pulled herself together, washed her hands, and rushed over to her desk.

She cleared her throat before speaking. “Yes.”

“Sorry to bother you, Gray, but can you come out to my desk? I think you need to take a second look at the Perfect Proposal article before I send it over to Sienna.”

“Sure, Breann, I'll be right there.”

Gray wondered what the problem could be as she walked over to the door. She'd gone over the article a million times. It was perfect.

“So what's the problem?” she asked.

“Right here.” Breann turned the paper around to face Gray. “Look at this.”

To Gray's surprise, written in bold print letters were:
GRAY, WILL YOU MARRY ME
?

“What?” she whispered.

“Behind you.” Breann pointed and giggled.

Gray swiftly spun around and found Truth, along with Sienna and all of her other coworkers, smiling. Truth was charmingly handsome in a classic black Hugo Boss suit. The lapel of the jacket was unbuttoned, revealing a crisp white shirt. On his feet were a pair of patent leather lace-up Salvatore Ferragamo dress shoes. A robust bouquet of pink peonies and a small black velvet box completed the picture perfect moment.

“Are you okay?” he asked, handing her the flowers and taking her hand.

“Uhhhh, I guess,” Gray answered, flabbergasted.

“Look, I know you're in shock.” Truth got down on one knee.”But, Gray, I love you. I've loved you from the day we met, and I know that if you give us a chance, I can make you happy. You're the one for me. Please tell me I'm the one for you and say yes.”

Gray stood shell shocked as everyone looked on, awaiting her answer. She couldn't believe Truth was proposing. Yes, they'd been hanging out a lot, but she hadn't made any real commitment to him.

Maybe it's a sign
, she thought. Gray was carrying his baby. Maybe they were supposed to be together. She and Gunz didn't have a future. He was building a life with Devin. Why should she deprive herself of some happiness too?

“Yes, I'll marry you.”

The smile on Truth's face lit up the entire room. Everyone clapped and cheered as he placed a Martin Flyer platinum-beaded round diamond engagement ring onto her finger. Truth stood up and took her into his arms.

“You are making me so happy,” he spoke softly into her ear.

“Uh-huh.” Gray hugged him back, all the while thinking,
What am I doing?

 

Gunz sped down 1-70 blasting “Live Your Life” by T.I. and Rihanna. Bobbing his head to the beat, he mashed his foot on the gas. The speedometer raced up to eighty miles per hour. Thoughts of his father swarmed his mental museum. He'd spent the last three hours at the hospital with him. Watching his father die was a tiring and agonizing experience.

Each day, his father grew more weak and exhausted. He'd lost so much weight that he was barely recognizable. The one good part of it all was the many long conversations he and Gunz shared. Joseph called it droppin' jewels. During their daily chats, he relayed many life lessons he'd learned throughout the years.

Gunz listened with an open heart and mind to each story. He'd learned that although his father wasn't a perfect man and had made many mistakes, he was very smart and insightful. He realized that in life you needed two things: your family and the love of a good woman. Gunz already had his family by his side; the only thing missing was Gray. Pushing her away was the worst decision he'd made in life thus far.

Gunz was just getting off the exit when he received a call from his mother.

“What up, Ma?” he asked, excited to hear her voice.

“Gavin . . .”

“Yeah.”

“I don't know how to tell you this, but . . . your father just passed.”

 

“You got it smelling good in here.” Gray stepped into the kitchen and watched as Truth cut up pieces of chicken into cubes. He was preparing her favorite meal, chicken and shrimp alfredo with broccoli.

“Thanks, Future.” He leaned over and kissed her cheek.

A flashback of Gunz uttering the same words instantly entered her mind.

“Can you please not call me that?” She turned and opened the fridge.

“Why not? You are my future wife.”

“I know. I just . . . don't like the term, that's all.” Gray poured herself a glass of cranberry apple juice.

“A'ight,” Truth replied, slightly put off.

It bothered him that since his proposal, Gray hadn't been able to look him in the eye. When she did, it was almost like she was seeing through him. It was obvious that her heart wasn't his. It still belonged to Gunz. Truth was nothing more than her rebound guy, but with time, after they were married and the baby was born, she'd feel differently.

“Ay, can you turn the stereo on for me?” he asked.

“Sure. What do you wanna hear?”

“I don't know. Something good.”

After taking a sip of her drink, Gray placed down her cup and went into the living room. She still couldn't get over the fact that she was engaged—and pregnant, at that. Truth had responded just like she knew he would when she told him the news of her pregnancy. He was overjoyed. He couldn't wait to call his mother and give her the exciting information.

Gray sat on the floor and went through her CD case. After a moment of deliberation, she decided to put in Eric Roberson's first disk,
Presents: The Vault, Vol 1
. She loved his velvety voice.

As she eased her way up from the floor, there was a knock on the door. Not expecting any guests, Gray wondered who could've gotten past the gate.

“I'll get it, babe. You sit down and rest,” Truth suggested.

“No, I'll get it.” She waved him back into the kitchen.

Gray unlocked the door, and to her amazement, standing there as clear as day was Gunz. He was no longer a mere memory and a man from her past. He was there, close enough to touch. Gray quickly closed the door behind her and stepped out into the hallway.

“My bad. I ain't mean to stop by announced. I just needed to holla at you for a second,” he spoke while looking everywhere else but her face.

“What's wrong?”

“My ol' dude just passed.”

“Gunz, I am so sorry to hear that.” She reached out and caressed his arm.

She had only witnessed it once before, but it looked as if Gunz had tears in his eyes.

“I wish there was something I could do.”

“This shit is fucked up, yo.” His voice trembled as he finally became able to stare into her slanted blue eyes.

“I'm so sorry, Gunz.” Gray lovingly placed her arms around his waist.

Gunz, without hesitation, wrapped his arms around her as well. Everything in that moment made sense. Their bodies molded together like clay and they became one. Gray never wanted to leave his side. Gunz felt the same way. She would forever hold his heart in her hands.

“Babe, are you okay?” Truth opened the door.

“Yeah.” She abruptly let Gunz go and stepped back.

Truth tried to hide the fury that was raging inside of him, but hate for Gunz flooded his eyes.

“Umm . . . Gunz's father just died.” Gray tried to explain.

“No need to explain, sweetheart.” Truth looked at Gunz and kissed the outside of her left hand.

Gray's engagement ring gleamed like the sun. Gunz didn't know how he hadn't recognized it before. Gray focused her attention on the floor. She couldn't bear seeing the throbbing look of pain in Gunz's eyes.

“Did you tell him, sweetheart?” Truth smirked.

“Truth, stop.” Gray shot him a look that could kill.

“What? I think the man needs to know we're getting married and you're having my baby.”

“Gunz . . .” Gray tried to explain.

“It's good, ma.” He sucked in his bottom lip and massaged his chin. “Like I said, my bad for just poppin' up. Y'all have a good night.”

The Waffle House was filled to the brim with people. It was a Sunday morning in April. Kema, Heidi, Tee-Tee, and Gray shared a booth, awaiting their food. Gray could barely fit in the seat; her stomach was so big. She was four months pregnant and showing a lot. That didn't stop her from ordering the All-Star Special Breakfast, which consisted of a waffle, eggs, hash browns, toast, sausage, bacon, and orange juice. On top of that, she added on a side of grits.

“Girl, yo' ass gon' be as big as a house you keep on eating like that,” Tee-Tee commented.

“Leave my pooh-pooh alone.” Heidi hugged Gray. “She looks beautiful, and I can't wait till my god-baby get here.”

“Yo' god-baby?” Tee-Tee scrunched up his forehead. “I think you got it confused, miss. That is my god-baby.”

“Both y'all bitches got it twisted,” Kema confirmed. “I'ma be the god-mama. Ain't that right, Gray?”

“First of all, all three of y'all are crazy. Tee-Tee, you're the god-mama.”

“Boo-yah!” He clapped his hands then snapped his fingers. “Told you! Now, take that in ya ass!”

“Heidi and Kema, you are too.”

“What?” Tee-Tee curled his lips.

“You all are my best friends, so all of y'all will be godparents.”

“Whaaateva.” He twisted up his lip and rolled his eyes. “So have you started planning the wedding?”

“Nope. I'm going to wait until the baby is born.”

“I think you should call it off,” Kema retorted, rolling her eyes.

“Why?” Heidi said, astonished. “Truth loves her.”

“Exactly. Truth loves her. She don't love him. And besides that, his ass is two screws away from being crazy.”

“Truth is not crazy.”

“Shiiiiit.”

“Okay, can you quit talkin' about the father of my child like that, please?” Gray cocked her neck to the side.

“I'm just sayin'.” Kema threw up her hands in defeat.

“He do be having that
Hand That Rocks the Cradle
look in his eye sometimes,” Tee-Tee agreed.

“Don't he?” Kema laughed, giving him a high five.

“Fuck the both of ya's, all right,” Gray shot.

“Girl, forget them,” Heidi jumped in. “Now, why aren't we planning our wedding?”

“Did this bitch not get the memo? She . . . don't . . . love . . . Truth,” Tee-Tee announced.

“Okay, can you be any more louder?” Gray looked around the restaurant, embarrassed.

“So you really don't love him?” Heidi questioned.

“I mean, I want to love him, but I just don't see him that way.”

“Well, why are you marrying him then?”

“'Cause her retarded ass don't want to be alone,” Tee-Tee declared.

“And because Gunz is wit' Devin,” Kema added.

“Are they serious?” Heidi asked, sincerely worried.

“No, that is not the reason.” Gray gave Tee-Tee and Kema the finger. “I'm marrying him because it's the right thing to do.”

“You sound like one of them dumb-ass bitches on
Desperate Housewives
.” Tee-Tee couldn't help but laugh.

“Keep on making fun of me and I'm gon' leave.”

“Yo' ass ain't going nowhere. Don't be mad at us 'cause we know the truth. You still in love wit' Gunz, and I dare you to say that you ain't.” He pointed his fork in her face.

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