Guardian's Joy #3 (21 page)

“Time passed and the Nephilim lost their way.
They abused their gifts, used their size and strength to make war
for their own advancement and eventually began to feed on the blood
and lives of humans. Over the centuries they forgot the strictures
of their fathers. God was not pleased and he set a curse upon their
kind. He sent his angel Gabriel to make war on them and The Great
Flood to annihilate those that remained. Still, a few survived and
those few saw the error of their ways. They couldn’t change what
they were, but they could change the way they lived. Thus the
Paenitentia were born. The Penitents. The Race. They refused to
take the blood of humans and in atonement for past sins, pledged to
protect mankind from the ravaging of those demons that escape
through the portals from the otherworld that was created when God
closed the Gates of Heaven. They have lived among and yet apart
from their human cousins for centuries, forbidden the light of
day.”

He knew she’d heard the story from the
Daughters of Man. But she needed to hear this one, too. She needed
to understand.

“We are Guardians of the Race,” he told her.
“It is our duty and our privilege to protect our people from the
demon host. It is a noble and honorable profession that dates back
to the Great Flood.” He paused. “We are not thugs.”

JJ’s head came up and her mouth opened. To
say what? That they hadn’t acted like thugs? They had. How many
times as a cop did she want to give some bastard a beat down for
whatever offence he committed? And yeah, most times it was on a
domestic call. But she didn’t do it. Her badge wasn’t a license to
punish offenders. Tonight, she’d done just that. She’d let the
things that were roiling inside her take over.

Nardo thought JJ was going to argue. Then her
mouth snapped shut and he saw the color rise in her cheeks. He kept
his hands balled into fists to keep from reaching out and telling
her it was okay. They’d all done it at one time or another. Even
old Broadbent lost it every so often. Now wasn’t the time for
sympathy. He needed to keep her off balance.

“Up.” He rose to his feet in one fluid
motion. He didn’t offer her a hand. He turned his back on her and
went to the wall where their equipment was shelved or hung in neat
and orderly rows. He’d originally planned unarmed combat, but he
didn’t want to remind her of the lame ass biker. He chose two
lightweight staves, something he was sure she hadn’t seen or used
before.

He spun and tossed one to her without
warning. Her hands came up and caught the pole firmly before it hit
her in the chest. It was instinct more than ability that saved her
from being struck. Good instincts could save your life.

All the praise she got from Nardo was a nod.
He tapped a pole exactly like hers on the space beside him where he
wanted her to stand. From there he took her through series of
moves, one by one. When her stance or movement was incorrect, he
stamped his foot lightly on the mat and said, “Again.”

He never criticized or showed disappointment,
not even when she lost her grip and almost whacked his shin with
the out of control staff. He merely blocked it, lightning fast, and
said, “Again.” The only sign she got that told her she’d done
something right was a slight nod of his head and the move to
something new.

JJ lost whatever anger and resentment she’d
brought to the gym. She relaxed and began to enjoy the workout.
Each time Nardo nodded, she felt her confidence grow. At first, she
paid close attention to his moves because she thought his intent
was to humiliate her, but that wasn’t the case. She should have
known he wasn’t the type to be petty or vengeful. As the session
progressed, she found herself watching for the nod. She liked the
way his approval made her feel.

He showed her each position and movement over
and over and when she finally finished the routine with only nods,
he bowed to her, a very Old World and courtly bow, and she beamed
with pleasure.

She was soaked with sweat and ready to quit,
but when Nico stuck his head in the door to tell them dinner was
ready, Nardo shook his head.

“We’re not hungry. Tell Grace we’ll get our
own when we’re done here.”

“Nice of you to ask me,” JJ said when the
door closed.

“You’re not in charge,” he replied. He threw
her a bottle of water from the fridge in the corner and sat with
his back against the wall. He patted the floor next to him.
“Sit.”

“I’d rather stand,” she said. She knew what
was coming; the lecture about beating an innocent, a human not
involved in demon activity. Except that guy was no innocent and as
far as she was concerned, he wasn’t quite human either.

“I didn’t ask, so sit,” he told her and when
she hesitated he added, “Or I will make you sit.”

“Fine,” she huffed as she flopped down beside
him. “Get it over with.”

“You’re the one wasting our ten minute
break.” He saluted her with his water bottle and drank deeply. “Do
you have any questions?”

No lecture? It caught JJ off guard. “Oh, well
yeah. You don’t really use those things, do you?”

“No,” he replied seriously. “But it teaches
you that anything you find on the street or in an alley can be used
as a weapon. Carrying one of those through town would draw too much
attention. So would getting into a brawl.” He paused and gave her
time to connect the dots.

JJ understood immediately. She didn’t like
it, but she had to admit it. “What I did tonight could draw
attention, too. Not when it happened, but that guy will remember me
and recognize me if he sees me again. So will the girl. Dov should
have thumped him and the girl and been done with it.”

“Where did you learn about thumping? And by
the way, the proper word is erase.”

“One of the twins must have told me,” JJ
said. It wasn’t true, but how would Nardo know.

“No, they didn’t,” he said sternly. “You knew
before that.”

He remembered. There was no point in lying.
“I knew the first time I saw you. You came to pick up Hope and her
sister. You did it to John, my partner and then you raised your
thumb to me and I knew. You were going to erase my memory and I
couldn’t let that happen again.” She’d drawn her gun and he’d let
her go.

“Again?” Nardo looked at her with raised
eyebrows, waiting for more.

JJ slumped back against the wall, her head
tilted against it. Again. Somewhere in her buried past, it had
happened before. She closed her eyes and said through clenched
teeth. “I don’t know. I can’t remember. I can’t remember anything
from my early teens. It’s like I went to sleep when I was twelve
and woke up at sixteen.” She wouldn’t tell him where she’d woken up
or how. This was more than she’d told anyone but John.

“Of course you can’t,” he said reasonably.
“You’d been thumped. Though that in itself is a mystery, because
according to Manon, Daughters can’t be thumped. Grace can’t. Hope
can’t. It stands to reason you can’t.” He looked at her
speculatively and raised his hand thumb out. “Let’s
experiment.”

JJ’s eyes widened and she pushed back against
the wall. Her mouth opened, but no sound came out. Nardo rolled up
on his knees to face her.

“Joy,” he said with quiet firmness, “Joy, I
won’t hurt you. I’ll only take a minute, maybe two and I’ll fill in
whatever I take. I promise.”

No, no, no, no, no.
This was what he
planned all along. He was going to take this place away from her,
just as the other did. She’d wake up in an unfamiliar alley with
months or years gone from her memory. She couldn’t let that happen,
not again, not ever again.

Her heart thundered in her chest. Her breath
caught in her throat. The roaring in her ears drowned out his
words. She threw herself to the side, ducked under his arm and
kicked out with her legs. Her feet connected flat against his chest
and she shoved with everything she had. Nardo’s body barely
shifted, but the power of her legs propelled her away from him. She
tried to rise, slipped in her panic and scrambled away on all
fours. She felt a hand grasp her ankle and a strength greater than
hers pull her back. She kicked with her unfettered foot and clawed
with her hands against the slippery floor. She was flipped to her
back and he was crawling up her body.

No, no, no, no, no. Not again. Not
again.

Chapter
21

This wasn’t going the way Nardo planned. Yes,
he wanted to keep her off balance, and yes, while they sparred with
the half staffs, he planned to bombard her with questions until she
was too overwhelmed to hold back. He wanted her as angry as the
young Nico had been. He never meant to induce such terror.

“I won’t hurt you,” he said, over and over.
“I won’t hurt you.”

But Joy was beyond hearing. Her eyes were
wide and unseeing. Wherever her fear had taken her, it wasn’t here
in this gym. She fought some unseen attacker, a ghost from her
past. This was worse than the night he’d carried her up the stairs,
much worse. Her mouth opened and closed, but no air was passing in
or out. He crawled up her body, pinning her flailing legs beneath
his and grabbing her wrists at her shoulders to keep her from
breaking the delicate bones as she slammed her fists against the
floor.

She was trapped. She was trapped. No matter
how hard she fought, she couldn't escape. He was going to kill her.
Joy did the only thing she could. She screamed and screamed and
screamed.

The door to the gym slammed open. They were
all in the hall.

“What’s going on?” Canaan demanded.

“Nardo, no!” Grace pushed past her mate and
Nico.

“Nico, get them out! Close the door! I won’t
hurt her,” Nardo shouted. He heard a brief scuffle at the door and
then it slammed shut.

Joy’s head was thrashing back and forth. Her
screams faded to whimpers, little mewling cries of fear that tore
at his heart. Pinning her hands beneath his elbows, he brought his
hands to her face and stroked her brow. He kissed her shut tight
eyes, her nose, her cheeks.

“Shh, baby, shh,” he whispered. His lips
hovered over hers. “It’s me, Nardo, the one you can trust. Not him,
not him, not the one who hurt you.”

Joy’s heart still pounded and her breathing
was still heavy, but her shoulders relaxed and her eyes were more
naturally closed. He continued to whisper against her lips and when
he lifted his elbows from her hands, she held them in place and
didn’t fight.

“That’s right, baby. I’m here and I’ll keep
you safe. I won’t hurt you. I’d never hurt you.”

Ever so gently, he slid his body from hers,
and lay down beside her. He slid one arm under her neck to pillow
her head and cradled her to him. She was stiff against him at
first, but as he stroked her hair and her back, she began to relax.
He stayed there with her until her heart resumed its slow, steady
rhythm and her breathing settled to normal. When he tried to shift
his body away, she clutched at his shirt with her free hand. Nardo
felt the clutch in his heart.

She was so strong and yet so fragile, so hard
and yet so soft. She was not the woman he’d always dreamed of and
yet, holding her like this in his arms, he couldn’t picture anyone
else taking her place. Fantasies failed him. Sticky with sweat, her
nose red and her face streaked with tears, she was the most
beautiful creature he’d ever seen. She was his Joy and whoever had
caused her such pain and terror, he would find and destroy.

He laid there on the floor, cushioning her
body as best he could, watching her sleep the sleep of emotional
exhaustion. He winced every time a flicker of pain creased her
smooth, silken face. He whispered soothing sounds against her
temple each time she stirred and was gratified when she eased at
the sound of his voice. It was all he could do to protect her from
the suffering of her dreams. At last, she settled peacefully
against him. Still, he watched and knew the moment her
consciousness began to rise from the depths of slumber.

JJ had been cold for so long. It had been
that way in all of her memories, as a child and as an adult. She
could only assume the same was true for the missing years. It
didn’t matter what season it was or whether she was heavily or
scantily clothed. She was cold.

She shifted her body until she was as close
to Nardo as anatomy would allow. As much as she hated this act of
dependence, she relished the heat from his body as it thawed the
coldness in hers. The comfort of his arms around her was something
she longed for yet never expected to find. Still, she caught
herself from succumbing completely and lifted her head from his
shoulder.

Nardo chuckled at her resistance. His fingers
combed over her temple and through the fringe of hair over her ear.
Three times his fingers passed, soft as a whisper, over the tender
skin of her hairline.

“It’s okay, you know. Accepting a man’s
comfort isn’t a sign of weakness.”

“I know,” she murmured. It would be so easy
to give in. Experience had taught her, however, that lines like
that were a dime a dozen and such comfort was fleeting at best.
Better to be without.

“No,” he said firmly. “You don’t. But you’ll
learn. I’ll teach you.” He leaned in and kissed her forehead.
“Besides, it’s too late to have second thoughts. You’ve been
snuggling up to me for hours now.”

“It couldn’t have been hours.” She tried to
sit up, but his arms held her firmly against him.

“Yes, hours. You snore, you know. It was kind
of sweet.” He snorted, long and loud followed by a drawn out
whistle.

“I do not snore,” she said indignantly.

“All right, you didn’t snore,” he laughed,
“But if you did, it would have been sweet.”

“Then it would be the only thing about me
that is.”

“Ah,” he laughed again. “Fully recovered, I
see.”