“Have we met?” the woman asked.
“He’s a model,” Kate whispered. “He’s on the billboard in Times Square.”
We went on to fill the woman in on the entire story, then tried on more dresses.
Wedding dress shopping was fun but also a little tough. I really wanted my mother’s approval, but she wasn’t here. Years had passed, but the pain of her loss was still a fresh wound for me, and not having her there was difficult and emotional. We had always talked about that special day, and planning it without my mom by my side made me a little sad, even if the whole thing wasn’t real. I missed her, and I was so lost without her guidance and love. I felt the loss so deeply. She would never meet the man of my dreams, if he even existed.
The consultant gave me a dress she recommended, and while Zack totally onboard with it, I absolutely hated it.
“I don’t think I’ll like this one,” I told her.
“C’mon. Give it a try. It’s one of my favorites, and it’s on sale,” Zack pleaded.
Not wanting to disappoint Zack, I stuffed myself into it, only to find that it was about three sizes too small. The consultant tightened the corset, like they did for the Southern belles in
Gone with the Wind
, and I walked out, practically suffocating,
“That looks a little tight,” Kate said.
“A little?” Zack said.
The bell dinged as another customer walked in, and I realized I didn’t want to be putting on an embarrassing show for strangers.
“I can’t breathe,” I said.
When I turned in a circle, Zack about died laughing.
“What?” I said.
“I don’t know how to explain it any other way, honey, but crack kills. You’ve got the plumber thing goin’ on back there, practically from your bottom to your shoulders.”
Kate covered her mouth with her hand as a big smile crept over her face.
I let out a long sigh. “I’m trying something else on.”
“Julia!” a familiar voice called out.
I turned around and found myself staring into the eyes of a past lover. My head began to spin.
“Luke?
What do I do? Gosh, what do I do?
It had been so long since I’d seen him, and even though I’d thought about him from time to time, I had never imagined I’d actually see him again. Just the sight of him lured all sorts of memories and feelings to the surface, and even if I didn’t want to think about them at that moment, standing in a corset in a bridal shop, there was nothing I could do to stop that flood of emotions.
He seemed taller, and my memory scrambled to readjust, to accept that the man before me was really just the boy who’d left me. He was dressed in a black suit that fit impeccably, as if it was tailored for his male physique, and it made him look sharp and elegant. His blue eyes glittered, and his black, wavy hair had grown a bit and now touched his shoulder.
Wow!
I had thought about Luke many times over the years, but I always tried to put those thoughts out of my mind. I think it was really because I didn’t want to hold out that secret hope that we would meet again; I didn’t want to set myself up to be disappointed. Disappointment was really the story of my life, though, for no guy since him had ever even come close to making me feel the way he did. He had lingered in my mind as nothing but a distant memory, until he stepped into that bridal shop at the worst possible time.
The hairs on my arms stood up, and heat flooded my body as I gawked at him. I couldn’t believe he was there, that the impromptu reunion was really happening. I blinked a few times, certain that he was just a mirage, some sort of hallucination, but that wasn’t the case. He was getting closer and closer, and it really was him.
I couldn’t move; it was as if someone had glued my feet right where they were standing. Our eyes met almost instantaneously. When they did, his mouth dropped open, his eyebrows shot up, and he smiled that big, happy grin of his and hurried over to me.
“Julia!” he said. “Wow! I can’t believe it.”
I wasn’t sure whether to run over to meet him or just wave and keep my distance. We ultimately settled or middle ground and an awkward half-hug. Still, even for those few seconds, his touch awakened something in me, something I was sure I had safely packed up and tucked away five years ago, after he left for the Trump job.
“Hi, Luke.” I looked down at the floor, feeling the hot blush on my cheeks and wondering just how red my face was. When I looked up again, he was still smiling.
“I was hoping I might run into you someday,” he said. “New York is a big city, but we both live here.”
“Well, here I am,” I said, trying not to sound sheepish. I wanted to be calm, cool, and collected, but I knew I was failing miserably. Even when I closed my eyes, I still saw his face, and I couldn’t stop thinking about how badly I’d missed him over the years, as angry as I was at him for giving up on us. “It’s good to see you,” I finally managed to say, clumsily dropping the veil from my shaky hand.
He picked it up and handed it back to me. Our fingertips brushed, and it was like an electrical current shooting up my arm. It took everything in me not to jump back in reaction to the sensation.
“Hey,” he said, his voice low and soft, “Julia, it’s okay.”
I wanted to brush the remark off and act like I didn’t know what he was talking about, but I knew he’d see through any façade like that. I just smiled, took a deep breath, and said, “I know. I’m just…surprised to see you.”
“How are you?” he asked, making casual conversation that didn’t feel casual at all.
“Good. And you?”
“I’m great.”
The love of my life, the one who had left me to go to Hong Kong, was standing right there before me. I was dumbfounded, as if I’d been struck by lightning. It felt like the whole world had stopped spinning, and there was no one on it but the two of us. I stared into his blue eyes and was unable to speak for a minute as our eyes locked. I was so discombobulated and caught off guard. My stomach churned. Luke was supposed to be my groom, the one who would put the ring on my finger, and now I was standing in an ill-fitting wedding gown in front of him, like a fool, preparing to pretend-marry my gay friend with a ring from a bubble gum machine. Emotional turmoil flooded through me like a tidal wave, my heart began to race beneath the too-tight corset, and my palms began to sweat, soaking the veil.
Does he still find me as pretty and captivating as he did five years ago?
I wondered, but then I had to wonder why I even cared. Yes, he was hot, but the feelings went far deeper than lust. I missed our friendship, our long talks, and the way he always made me laugh. Luke had left such a deep imprint on my life, and in our time together, he had made me a better person.
“You look beautiful,” he said, answering the question I was too afraid to ask, “just stunning.”
“Thank you. But, uh, t-this dress is a little tight.”
“A little,” Kate repeated, chiming in with a slight chuckle.
“I didn’t know you were getting married,” he said.
“And why would you care, you dream-killing asshole?” Kate snapped, glaring at him.
I motioned for her to stand down. She knew the entire story and was livid about what he’d done to me, but I didn’t need her to defend my honor.
I stared at him, and no words would come out of my mouth. I felt flushed, and the room seemed to grow smaller by the second. I’d never seen him look so hurt. I could tell he wanted me to deny her accusation, and I would have, if my lips would have only cooperated.
My mind flashed back to our kiss at the airport, to the declarations of love that we’d made to each other before he left me. It stung to realize that they were only sweetly worded lies, at least on his part. When my thoughts returned to the present, my heart was literally aching.
Luke was looking at me, still waiting intently for me to say something.
I had no idea what to say or how to respond to his presence or Kate’s words, so I opted to shift the attention to him. “I didn’t know you would ever come to New York City.”
He winked. “My boss was Donald Trump.”
“So you work in Trump Tower in Manhattan?”
“I used to. Not anymore though.”
“A real apprentice for the most famous boss in the world!” the bridal assistant said. “Wow! Have you met him?”
“Yes, and he’s been a fabulous mentor for me. He taught me how to become an entrepreneur.”
I tried to keep my hands from shaking, to no avail. “Well, congratulations. Looks like all your dreams came true.”
He stared at me intensely. “Not
all
of them.”
Our eyes locked, but no words were exchanged. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach, and we stared at each other in disbelief that our paths had crossed right there in New York.
“Sorry to stare,” he said. “I just didn’t expect to see you in a wedding gown. So, uh…you’re getting married?”
“You didn’t expect her to sit around here and wait, did you?” Kate said.
“Of course not.”
“I drove out here all by myself,” I said. “I went to school here, like I planned. I had a bit of a rocky start, but everything turned out for the best. I’m a fashion photographer now.”
He gaze darted back to me. “Congratulations on going after your dream as well. You always had a fantastic eye for photography, a real natural.”
“Yeah…”
“I’m Julia’s husband,” Zack cut in.
“Not yet you’re not, mister,” Kate scolded. “You haven’t exchanged vows yet…and I
know
you haven’t consummated it either,” she said, winking at him.
He smirked at her, then held out his hand for a shake. “Um, I mean fiancé.”
Luke shook his hand. “I’m Luke. It’s nice to meet you, and I wish the both of you the best of luck. Julia and I grew up together. She’s an amazing person, as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside, but I’m sure you already know that.”
“I do, and we’re gonna enjoy a long and happy life together,” Zack said. “I knew it the second I kissed her. She kisses like a sweet angel.”
I motioned to Kate. “Um, this is my roommate, Kate.”
She waved and immediately dropped the scowl from her face. “Hey!”
Zack wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close, being so dramatic he had to be in line for an Oscar. “When I see this beautiful vision standing here in the dress she’s going to wear on our wedding day, it just makes me want to cry.”
When he awkwardly tried to give me a fake kiss, I softly elbowed him. Zack was an awesome, sought-after model, but he was not great at acting and improve, and he was far too grossed out at the thought of kissing a girl for his attempt to look anywhere close to authentic. “You know how much I hate public displays of affection,
sweetheart
,” I said.
“Sorry, luv,” he replied.
“I hope he spoiled you with the diamond I always meant to get you,” Luke said, looking down at my empty ring finger.
“It’s being cleaned,” Zack said. “I wanted that two-carat rock to sparkle from miles away. Only the best for my bride.”
Luke smiled. “I’m sure it’s gorgeous, just like the lady who’ll wear it.”
His gaze met mine, and our eyes locked once again. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t stop staring at his handsome face. He’d obviously been working out, as his athletic frame, broad shoulders, and powerful chest were quite amazing, far more fit than he was when I knew him before, even though he was quite appealing back then.
“You look great,” I said.
“Thank you.”
“What made you come in here?” Kate asked. “Looking for a bargain wedding dress?”
“I saw Julia through the window, and she took my breath away.”
“Well, you lost your chance, buddy,” Zack said. “As a matter of fact, I think it’s best that you leave. You’re intruding on a very private moment between me and my future wife. I’m asking you nicely, so please don’t make me ask again.”
“Well, it was nice seeing you, Julia,” he said, taking the hint.
“Yes, it was very nice to see you too. Take care, Luke.”
After he left, Zack and Kate exploded in a fit of laughter.
“Don’t make him ask you again?” Kate asked, laughing so hard that she was holding her side in pain. “What? Were you gonna fight him or something? Put that pretty face of yours at risk?”
Zack smiled. “What? I was trying to play the part of chivalrous knight, fighting for my queen.”
“But you
are
the queen,” Kate said.
He smiled. “A hero always gets his man in the end, er…his girl.”
“It’s okay,” I said. “He’s nobody anyway. I let go that part of my life a long time ago,” I told them, though I wasn’t sure it was true.
My stomach was in knots, and I couldn’t breathe. I wanted to blame it on the corset, but I knew there was more to it than that. Nevertheless, it was a convenient excuse for my untimely breathlessness. “I better get out of this dress.” Instead of going back to the dressing room, though, I ran to the bathroom and puked in the toilet. Seeing my old flame had hit me hard, stirred up so many feelings and a whole lot of stress, into a nasty cocktail that left me nauseous.