Grave Possession (Wraith 3) (20 page)

“Whatever. You love
Zefron. Everyone loves him.”

Connor didn’t require much arm twisting. When we got to the room, I saw Ava had left a note on the white board.

Last minute trip home – see you Sunday night.

“Christian,” I said as an explanation. “Have you seen him lately?”

“Once over break. He was at a party with some guys from school.” He sat on the edge of my bed out of lack of other seating. My school bag filled the desk chair and Ava had a pile of clothing on hers. That was one of the weird things about dorm life. The bed became part of the furniture. Which could be fine, unless it was awkward. Like right now.

Things changed the last time we shared a bed. Things I hadn’t reconciled.

“Well, they’re totally in love. It’s sort of disgusting.” I kicked off my shoes and hung up my coat. I slipped behind the closet door and found some sweats and a T-shirt. Double checking that he couldn’t see me, I pulled off my dress.

“Do you miss Louis?” he asked.

“Probably not as much as I should,” I admitted. Exiting the closet, I found a hair band on the dresser and tied the long part back. The streaks of dark pink had faded to a lighter shade. “Which, I guess, is part of the problem.”

“Have you heard from him?”

I shook my head and picked my laptop off the desk. I sat next to Connor on the bed, scooting back to the wall so I was sideways. He moved next to me. “I haven’t talked to him or told him what happed between us. I think I pretty much nailed that coffin shut and it’s only fair to let him move on. The worst part is how I proved him right.”

“How so?”

“He was worried about us together. Look what happened. The next time we were alone, you know, kaboom.” The air evaporated out of the room and we were ridiculously close to one another.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “
Kaboom.”

“So, movie,” I said, turning off the lights. “I’ve got John Hughes. The Muppets, the entire Judd
Apatow collection…”

“Let’s go with the Muppets,” he said.

“Right.” With the Muppets there was less chance of possible nakedness or anything else that could escalate the rising heat between us. I queued up the movie and pressed play. Connor settled into one side of the bed and I stayed on the other. I felt the pull between us – it’d always been there. Even with the physical distance, there was a level of comfort that I’d never had with Louis. Maybe because the whole time I was with him, I was trying to convince myself it was okay.

The movie wore on and Connor and I stretched our legs across the bed. He fell asleep first, lips parted, arms crossed over his chest. I closed my eyes and drifted off, but not to sleep. Not yet.

“How come we never watch movies?” Evan said from across the room. He lounged directly across from me on Ava’s bed, amid her discarded clothing. “And thanks for finally coming to see me.”

“Sorry, things have been a little hectic.”

He glanced over my shoulder where Connor lay sleeping. “Since when do we bring dates to these things?”

“I’m not sure this really counts as a date.”

“Connor? Really? I thought we were done with this particular vice.”

“He’s helping me.” I stood up. I felt the energy rolling off Evan’s body. Energy I shouldn’t take. I learned that tonight. I inhaled anyway, smelling its sharp, electric pull. “Did you realize I was being used as a vessel for parasitic ghosts to travel from your world to mine?”

“Um… parasitic whats?”

“Ghosts. All this black gunk?” I bravely batted my hands at the trails of wispy smoke. “Those are ghosts. Or parts of them. They’re attaching to me.”

“Like fleas?”

“Pretty much.”

Evan looked around the room. “How?”

“I don’t know exactly, but it’s happening when you and I talk like this and when I take energy from you or the other ghosts. Apparently, my bad habit has some serious consequences.”

“Well, what’s the point then? What do they want?”

“Nothing good. This one psychic lady I met said they’re all evil spirits looking to do harm, but I don’t see how. Nothing bad is happening to me.”

He nodded and said, “I haven’t noticed anything bad. Seems like just a bonus from all the bad crap with Charlotte.”

“Exactly.” I smiled. Evan always understood me.

“Maybe it’s just some lingering mojo or something. Psychic dust or something.”

“Bullshit.”

Evan’s eyes flicked behind me and I snapped my head around. Connor had roused himself from his body and sat up. “Connor?”

He ran his hands over his face, trying to wake himself up. “So this is where you two hang out?”

“How did you get here?”

“I don’t know. I just heard you two talking and forced myself awake. I ended up here. I’m
assuming it’s not a dream.”

“What gave it away?” Evan smirked. “Don’t you dream about me?”

“Mostly the amount of clothing Jane’s wearing and the fact you’re here.”

Oh, man.

“Knock it off,” I said, looking between the two guys. “Both of you.”

“What did you mean when you said bullshit?” Evan asked. The two boys had never been friends, but they had formed an alliance at once point. With me on the other side. I had no interest in that happening again. I preferred these two separated.

“There are consequences to what’s going here. Every time Jane comes to you, she takes back some of these parasites. She’s clouding her own ability to see spirits. She’s missing things and it’s putting her in danger.”

“Is this true?” Evan asked me.

“Maybe. We don’t really know.”

“We know enough that the spirit huffing, or whatever you want to call it, has to stop. It’s weakening you,” Connor said.

“I’m not huffing.”

“Then what is it?”

“None of your business, that’s what it is.”

“Don’t be childish, Jane. You know this situation is bigger than just you getting some kind of spiritual high. It could be deadly.”

“You’re saying that because you’re jealous.”

Connor gave me an incredulous look. “Jealous? Of what?”

“Of me and Evan. You think you got me back, don’t you? Louis is gone and now it’s just Evan in the way. There’s always something keeping us apart. God forbid, I have this one thing.” I turned and saw Evan watching us wide-eyed. “This. One. Thing. And you aren’t taking it away.”

Connor swallowed back his anger, but I could still see it in the flex of his jaw and the darkening of his eyes. “I’m not trying to take Evan away. That argument is old and lame. You’re panicking because I’m calling you on your addiction.”

“You would know,” I spat.

“Damn straight I would, and you’re acting like a lunatic. Evan, dude, this isn’t about you, but Jane is not safe. This situation is not good. Not until we can figure out what is going on with this passageway. These spirits are not passive. They’re dangerous.” He turned and gripped my upper arms. “It’s time for us to go.”

I jerked away. “No. You don’t get to make that decision.”

“Go with him, Jane,” Evan said.

“What? Why?”

Connor reached for me, but I pushed him away. Well, I tried to push him away but the black smoke had me surrounded, twisting around my arms and binding my legs. The room darkened and it was hard to see Evan through the foggy haze. Connor’s hand tightened around mine and he yanked hard, but not before I heard Evan say, “Later.”

*

We woke up tangled together, legs and hands intertwined. I jerked away, moving quickly to the opposite end of the bed.

“Whoa,” I said, clutching my pounding head. The lingering emotions from moments before felt raw and fresh. “What the heck was all that?”

“That was you being dangerous and belligerent,” Connor said, leaning back against the wall. With heavy bags under his eyes and his hair wild and disheveled, he didn’t look much better than I felt. “Does it always feel like you’ve been through a blender when you leave that place?”

“No.” I stared down at my hands. A slight tremor ran under the skin. “But normally I get my hit of ghostie energy before I leave. And normally there isn’t all that black stuff following me through the door – not like that at least.”

We stayed separate on the bed, licking our psychic wounds. Normally, I emerged from a visit with Evan energized. This time, I’m left with the dark hole, eating away at my core. “How did you get in there with me?”

“Like I said, I heard your voices and followed them.”

“But you shouldn’t be able to. Not by my theory.”

“Which is?”

“That Charlotte trying to body snatch me left me vulnerable. I felt her inside me, and that planted the darkness inside, allowing me to travel from here to there. Why can you go there, too? And why now?”

“I’ve got no idea,” he said, rubbing his face with his hands. “But you understand why that’s the last time either of us will be going there? Right?”

What Connor asked was easier said than done. I closed my eyes and tried to feel the warmth that had been rolling off Evan. Blinking away the memory, I said, “I don’t know if I can promise that.”

“You don’t really have a choice, Jane. It’s too dangerous.”

“Ugh,” I groaned, scrambling off the bed to get further away from him. “Leaving Evan isn’t a choice for me either! Don’t you see that?”

“Is it him or the effect?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you miss him or do you miss the way he makes you feel? The way the ghosts make you feel? You’re a junkie. It’s hard to determine the difference between want and need.”

“I’m not a junkie.”

“Then take a break. Give us some time to figure this out.”

Rage bubbled under the surface. How dare he. “This really isn’t for you to decide. Or push.”

“Why not? It affects me too.”

“Oh, really? How is that? How does this have anything to do with you, Connor?”

He jumped out of the bed with more speed than I knew he had and towered over me, hands fisted by his side. “How? Did you really ask me that? Are you so deluded that you think all of this only affects you? That the rest of us are immune?”

“I’m not deluded,” I declared. “Or self-absorbed.”

“No, but sometimes I wonder if you’ve got the slightest clue how much you mean to me? To Ava? And even to Evan? When you risk you own safety and sanity, it hurts all of us.”

His accusation knocked the wind out of me. There was truth behind his words. All I wanted was another hit and I was furious for leaving Evan without getting one. “This was easier before,” I said.

“Before what?”

“You came back.”

My words landed like a slap across his face. I could tell by his slack jaw and astonishment. “What the hell does that mean?”

I groaned, not wanting to have this conversation. Again. “Before we started hanging out with one another I was fine. Doing great. I had a boyfriend and friends and my classes. I kicked ass last year, normally and paranormally. But with us, there’s always something between us. Always. We fight. We lie and hide stuff. We keep secrets and I’m pretty sure we aren’t good for each other.” I gestured between us. “There’s something undeniable that binds us together and I’m not sure it’s love. It’s something else and it’s exhausting, Connor. I just can’t do this anymore.”

“You
don’t
think it’s love?” Panic seeped in behind the sadness on his face and I looked down at my feet. His low voice cut to the bone. “That’s exactly what binds us, Jane.”

“I don’t know if that’s true.” Evan loved me. He didn’t challenge me like this. Our friendship was easy.

“Don’t do this, Jane. Not now. Not again.”

“I’m not doing anything but being realistic! We can’t just fumble around together like this because we have this ‘thing’ in common. It’s stupid and it’s a mistake.”

He took a step forward and reached for my fingers. I pulled them back but he latched on. “I’ll give you space, because obviously you’re freaking out, but I’m not going anywhere. You may be mixed up about a lot of things, but I’m not. I’ve loved you for a long time and I still love you. I let you push me away once and I’m not doing it again.”

“Connor…”

“No. Don’t say anything else you’ll regret.” He leaned down and kissed me, soft at first and then deeper, lips parted, sweet and loving. “Go to sleep. For real. Take a nap and rest. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

I pulled my fingers from him and grabbed at my chest, turning away from him. I refused to look as he gathered his coat and shoes. When the door shut behind him, I unclenched my hand and grabbed the desk chair for support.

“Holy crap.”

I should have pushed back. I should have fought him, but I didn’t. In that one kiss every ounce of energy I craved from Evan and the spirits rushed through my body, filling the vast hole I’d grown accustomed to in my chest.

Had the emptiness started when Charlotte attacked me or when Connor left?