Grandma Robot (10 page)

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Authors: Fay Risner

Tags: #humor and supernatural mystery, #robots replacing humans, #humor about relationships

BOOK: Grandma Robot
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More cattle emerged from the mist
to surround and stare at the women. “You think we're going to run
into two horses in this fog we can mount?” Henie
quipped.

“Of course, not,” snapped
Karen.

“Then we better wing it while
we're a foot and sing,” Henie advised.

“What tune did you have in
mind?”

“I think a hymn
would be appropriate since we're in this predicament. We could use
some divine help.
In The Garden
seems perfect. Do you know it?”

“I don't have it memorized. I
usually sing it from a hymnal at church,” Karen
grumbled.

Henie squeezed Karen's hand. “Well,
hang onto me for moral support and follow my lead. Just do the best
you can. Sing low and no sudden movements.”

Karen watched one very curious cow,
edging along with them. Her nostrils flared as she sniffed them.
“You should tell that to the beast following us.”

“Just start
singing.” Henie took a deep breath and began. Karen joined in.

I come to the garden alone while the dew
is still on the roses, and the voice I hear falling on my ear the
Son of God discloses. And He walks with me, and He talks with me,
and He tells me I am His own; and the joy we share as we tarry
there, none other has ever known.

They finished the song as they came
to the fence line. “We're here,” Henie said, sounding relieved.
“See we found the cemetery.”

As easy as that
was for you, even in a fog, I'll just bet you've been here
before
, Karen thought.“Thank goodness, and
I think we lost the cows.”

“That was the idea. I thought that
song was right for the the spot we were in. Didn't you? Of course,
as off key as you were, they probably got tired of listening to us
mutilate that pretty hymn.” Henie turned east and went through the
gate in the cemetery fence.

They walked through the moisture
laden, calf high grass as they skirted along the fence line by the
graves. Karen's jean legs and Henie's skirt soaked up the moisture
like a wick in a lamp.

Henie rounded the corner and
stopped by the two older sandstones belonging to the Cranes. “This
is who I came to see.” Her voice was sad as she patted the top of
Clell Crane's tombstone.

“Why did you insist on coming here
today in this awful fog?” Karen complained.

“Today is Clell's birthday.
They're the people in the picture I showed you in the attic,” Henie
said. “I just wanted to pay my respects to him on his
birthday.

You're from a different generation
so you may not be aware of it but visiting loved ones in the
cemetery is something humans used to do. On Memorial Day, they left
flowers on loved ones graves. I've always thought just any time is
right to leave flowers or pay visit. It doesn't have to be just on
a once a year holiday.”

“Don't you think it's time you
told me more, Henie? How about telling me the truth for a change,”
Karen said.

“I have always told you the
truth.” Henie sounded put out.

“Maybe, but you do it a bit at a
time. I figured out some time back when you start a sentence with
I'll bet that means you're telling me the truth when you're talking
about Henrietta and Clell Crane.” Karen pulled the picture out of
her pocket. “My mother brought me some old pictures, because on
your say so I asked about my family tree. When she was here, she
was amazed and a little shaken up by you. By the way, it takes a
lot to shake up my mother.”

“I noticed,” Henie said,
grinning.

“Seeing you wasn't funny to Mom.
Since she remembers her Grandma and Grandpa Crane she recognized
you from this picture.” Karen held the picture in front of Henie.
“Down to what color your dress. Just our luck, by coincidence, you
happened to be wearing it the day Mom was here and jogged her
memory.”

Henie gazed fondly at the picture
and rubbed a finger over Clell's face. “That was a wedding
anniversary. The last one.”

“What is your last name, Henie?
Mom asked me so I made up one,” Karen shot at her.

Henie's lips pressed tightly
together as she looked from the picture to Karen.

“The truth, Henie,” Karen
demanded.

“I think my last name is Crane,”
Henie said.

Karen swallowed hard. “Doesn't that
seem impossible even to you when you say it?”

“All I'm saying is, I might be
your great grandmother, and Clell, God rest his sweet soul, your
great grandfather,” Henie admitted.

“Can you explain how that can be
when the Cranes are both buried here?” Karen wavered a finger at
the graves.

“I can't. That's the plain and not
so simple truth of it. I know how strange this sounds to a
practical woman such as you. I know I'm a mechanical robot that
isn't supposed to have a past. When I came to your house, I felt
and looked like a teenager. I powered down for the night and woke
up the next morning an old lady. I didn't understand it any more
than I expect you to understand. I felt right away like your house
was my home. I realized I knew more than the information I had
programmed in me.

All sorts of memories were in me
from seventy to eighty years ago about the farm and your great
grandparents. Now that is the truth.

I didn't ask to
channel your great grandmother. It just happened. I don't mind, but
if that bothers you, you call Amy and tell her to come get me.”
Henie walked toward the gate. “We can go now. Keep up with me until
we get back to your yard gate. I'd hate to lose you in the fog. The
cows might get you if you're in the pasture alone unless you
memorized the words to
In The
Garden
.” As an after thought, she turned
and waved at the headstone. “Bye, Clell. Happy
Birthday.”

Mid way across the pasture, the sun
came out, and the fog lifted. Karen had time to give what Henie
said some thought. She had seen the transformation in Henie and
watched her connect to the house as if she belonged there more than
Karen did. She couldn't rationalize Henie's story. She wasn't sure
she wanted to since she'd grown fond Henie. It was nice to have a
grandmother in the house with her.

Karen looked ahead of them. In the
distance she saw the house. She pointed it out.

Henie quipped, “Just where we left
it. Imagine that, and you're not lost yet.”

“Right, and I kept up with you all
the way to the cemetery and back. Imagine that?” Karen
retorted.

 

Chapter 11

 

When they arrived home, Karen
wasn't about to mention it to Henie, but she was bushed. She headed
to her office to sit. Henie followed her. “Would you like a glass
of ice tea, dear?”

“That sounds good,” Karen said,
quickly turning on the computer like she meant to work.

Henie stared at the answering
machine. “Your machine is blinking at you.”

“So it is.” Henie left for the
kitchen as Karen pushed the button. “Hi Karen. This is Amy Brown.
It's time to give back the robot. I'll be coming for her in an
hour. Don't bother to call me back with directions to your house. I
had to get them from your mother.”

In the kitchen, Henie was just
pouring the glass of tea when Karen went to tell her.

“You feeling better,” Henie said,
smiling at her.

Karen scraped the chair up under
the table. “Can't fool you can I? Yes, sitting a few minutes did
wonders. May I have a chocolate chip cookie to go with that ice
tea?”

“Of course, you can. Have as many
as you can eat?” Henie said generously as she placed the large
glass of tea in front of Karen and pushed the cookie plate
closer.

“Will you sit with me? I need to
talk to you about something,” Karen said.

“What is it now?” Henie said,
exasperated as she sat down that Karen might have more
questions.

Karen picked up a cookie. “If I
told you I don't care whether there's an explanation for how you
have somehow channeled my great grandmother, would it make you feel
better?”

Henie perked up.
“Maybe.”

Karen continued, “I've enjoyed
having you here with me. You've livened me up and taught me a thing
or two about living.”

Henie's bottom lip jutted out, but
her eyes sparkled. “Only a thing or two?”

Karen smiled. “Henie, bottom line
is you're good for me. I'd like to have you stay here with
me.”

Henie looked pleased. “Thank you,
dear. I would like that very much.”

Karen grasped Henie's hand. “The
only thing is we don't always get what we want. That missed call on
the answering machine was from Amy. She’s coming for you right
now.”

“I heard her voice. I was afraid
that was what she wanted,” Henie said. “One thing about being an
old lady robot is my eyesight and hearing never fails as long as my
battery stays charged.”

Karen said reluctantly, “I don't
have the money to buy you from Amy so you have to go back with
her.”

Henie sighed. “Well, it was fun
while it lasted, wasn't it, dear?”

“I don’t know what else I can do,”
Karen said with a hitch in her voice. She looked imploringly at
Henie and found she was sliding down in her chair. “Henie, are you
all right?”

The robot's eyes were half shut,
and her head drooped. Her voice came out at a droning, slow pace.
“You're not the only thing that played out on that hike. I think my
battery may need charging and at the worse time, too.”

Karen tilted her ear to the front
of the house. “Oh, no, I hear Amy’s car coming in the driveway. She
didn't waste any time getting here.” Suddenly, it was if a light
bulb lit in Karen's brain. “Wait a minute! Maybe I have an idea.
Henie, stay seated at the table and close your eyes. Don’t say a
word until I tell you to speak. Maybe we can make Amy think you're
in bad shape.”

Karen answered Amy’s knock on the
front door. “Come in. You didn't have any trouble finding my house
I see.”

“No, your mother gave me good
directions. I'd have been here sooner to take the robot off your
hands if you'd been nice enough to email me the directions. Where’s
the robot?” Amy asked curtly.

Karen waved back handed. “In the
kitchen.”

Amy marched that direction, and
Karen followed.

Amy gasped in dismay on first sight
of the robot. “What did you do to her?”

“I didn’t do anything to your
robot,” Karen said innocently as she noticed Henie's attempt to
help. She had to quench the desire to laugh and cry all at the same
time.

The robot had taken her bun out and
frizzed up her gray hair. A thick strand of wavy hair hid half her
sagging face.

Amy snorted. “That's not the robot
you took home. This one looks like an old woman two sheets to the
wind. Why didn't you tell me this happened?”

Karen shrugged. “Acts that way,
too. I called you to tell you I watched her transform before my
eyes. You didn't seem concerned at the time.”

Amy's face reddened. “I didn't
realize she looked this bad. I knew you were a messy housekeeper,
but not slob enough to wear her out. She’s nothing but a bucket of
bolts now!”

Karen rubbed the back of her neck
and agreed, “Before long she’ll be too rusted to move out of that
chair.”

“Why didn’t you call me before she
got this bad?” Amy demanded.

Karen shrugged. “I just thought
this was the way you programmed her to end up.”

“Not to age. She was never
supposed to do that. Look at that granny dress and apron. The
outfit sure suit her, but I'm sure that wasn't the uniform we sent
for her to wear. She’s no good to us the way she looks. We’ll have
to build another robot and start over.”

“Have any of the other robots
changed their age like this one?” Karen asked
innocently.

Amy eyed Henie as the robot's head
wobbled back and forth on her shoulders. “No, they have been turned
back in, and they're just the same as they left. I don't understand
this at all.”

“I'm guess something went wrong
with the computer programing in this one,” Karen
surmised.

“Could be but from the look of her
now, this robot isn't worth fixing,” Amy declared.

Henie's eyes rolled around, and her
head flopped onto the table with a resounding plunk as metal hit
formica.

“Well, if you don’t want to bother
to haul her back to the lab, I’d be willing to keep her until she
quits working completely. First thing in the morning, she has
enough energy to do the breakfast dishes. That's some help to
me.”

“You’re welcome to her, but you
have to figure out how to get rid of her later on. I sure don't
want her back at the lab for all the other techs to see my
failure,” Amy admitted.

Karen grimaced and looked at the
floor. “I'm sorry about this not working out for you,
Amy.”

Hearing the regretful tone in
Karen's voice made Amy remorseful. “Listen, I shouldn't have been
ranting and raving at you. It's not your fault the robot failed.
You were a good sport to try this experiment because I asked you to
do it.

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