Good Sensations (18 page)

She releases me with a smile, and Hugh says, “Good luck with your studies and have a safe flight.”

“Thank you.” We say our goodbyes, leaving only enough time to grab my suitcase and head to the airport.

My personal goodbye to Evan is tear-filled, but I manage to hold them back from falling. All the heavy emotions of our goodbye back in Hawaii a distant relative to today’s pain. Today my heart can handle this goodbye because even though it’s never easy leaving him or him leaving me, this time is different. This time I know that once we’re reunited, we won’t be separated again.

Leaving the dream world behind, I get back to reality and open my textbook on the plane, setting it on the tray in front of me, and start preparing for my finals.

I scan down the group names until I find ours and scroll across to see the grade: A.

Stepping away from the door and out from the crowd of students, I make my way to a nearby bench. I close my eyes, enjoying the fact that I made straight A’s despite the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on this semester.

A cleared throat and someone saying, “Congratulations,” grabs my attention.

My eyes pop open though I know who it is already—
Ryan
. “Congratulations,” I reply to be polite. Gathering my backpack, I swing it over my shoulder as I stand up to leave, my short moment of satisfaction ruined.

“Mallory, please,” Ryan says to my back, a distinctive plea to his tone.

I turn around, and exhale, exhausted by everything to do with him: Will, the project, his attentions. “Please what, Ryan? What do you want from me?”

“Can I apologize?” He doesn’t wait for a response and I wasn’t going to give him one anyway. “I was an ass. You were upfront about your boyfriend all along and uh, I don’t know.” He runs his hand through his hair, once again reminding me of Evan. “I’m sorry. Look, I didn’t mean to be such a dick. It’s just the whole long distance thing didn’t work for me and I figured it wouldn’t work for you.”

“Because you don’t know us.”

“You’re right. I got to know
you
though and I liked you. Simple as that. I wanted to be the one to pick you up when you were feeling down—”

“You mean when I was dumped?”

He shrugs. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Well, I wasn’t dumped. Actually, we’re better than ever.” I refuse to have Ryan be the first person I share my engagement with, even if I am feeling defensive.

“I’m glad to hear it. I’m glad you’re happy.”

“I don’t think you’re a bad guy, but you need stop all of this. You need to move on.”

“I can appreciate what you’re saying, but if—”

“There are no if’s for us. There will never be an ‘us’ at all.” I look down the hall, feeling bad, but I won’t prove Evan right and be the one to fuck us up trying to spare Ryan’s feelings. Evan comes first. “We can’t be friends either. I’m just not the girl for you, but hope you find someone special.” I turn around and walk away.

It’s over, even before he says, “I’m sorry, Mallory.”

That afternoon, I load up the trunk of the car with suitcases and hop in the driver’s seat ready to head to my parent’s house for Christmas break. When I turn the key to start the car, nothing happens, nothing but a few engine clicks. That doesn’t sound good.

“C’mooonnn, you can do it. C’mon. I’ll get you a nice oil change when we get home if you just run for me now. I promise,” I say, stroking the dashboard.

Closing my eyes, I scrunch my face up as I turn the key again. Nothing happens, not even the clicking this time. “Shit!” I yell, hitting the steering wheel.

Two hours later, Sarah pulls into my parent’s driveway and my dad rushes out to help while I hug Sarah goodbye. “Thanks for the ride.”

My dad grabs the suitcase and two other bags I brought home, including one full of dirty laundry. “I’ll head up after the holiday and work on the car.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

Sarah hops back into the driver’s seat, and says, “Let’s get together while we’re home, okay? Sunny said she’ll be back on Friday.”

Leaning in through the passenger door, I reply, “Yeah, for sure. And Merry Christmas.”

“You too, Mal.”

I settle into my girlie little bedroom, attempting to keep my stuff organized, but it’s tough. I’ve outgrown the room in more ways than one.

On Christmas morning, I watch my parents open the last of their gifts and sit back to enjoy our time together. Evan was right, because being here this time is different. I’m not a child anymore and my relationship with my parents has changed. I’m trying to appreciate every moment because our lives are about to change, but I’m still the only one privy to those changes.

The day after Christmas, a car comes squealing into the driveway making me jump. I run to the door to look and find Sunny and Zach running toward the house, trying to avoid the light rain that I know will turn the snow into muddy slush later.

I throw the door wide open and tackle her with a hug that almost knocks her over.

“Geez, Mallory, it’s only been two weeks,” she says, with a loud laugh. “I appreciate the love though.”

“I know, but we didn’t get much time together in New York and—”

“Been kind of bored, huh?” she asks, winking, knowing me too well.

“It hasn’t been too bad. Hey, Zach,” I say, giving him a hug.

“Hey there, Mal,” he says. “You doing okay?”

“I’m good.” I shrug. “Come inside.”

I introduce Zach to my parents and Sunny hugs both of them immediately making herself at home like she always does. They consider her the other daughter they never had.

We hang out for a while, catching up on the latest gossip, before making plans to meet later for a night out.

By nine that night, Sunny, Zach, and I walk into Main Street Bar and Grill. Sarah and Josh are already there saving a table in the corner.

We order a few pitchers, grab extra chairs for all of us to squeeze around the table, and chat. Zach fits right into the mix since he’s his usual friendly self and Sarah tells them about Ryan and Will ‘wanting’ me and how the project turned out. It’s all still too fresh, my emotions twisted by the memories of the trouble it caused.

“Bet Evan freaked when he found out about this Ryan dude,” Zach adds in, laughing. We all look at him and his smile disappears. “What… Oh! Oh shit is more like it, I guess. What happened?”

“Put it this way,” Sarah explains, “one guy ended the night with a bloody nose and the other with a broken ego and neither of them was Evan.”

Josh smiles, joining in the conversation. “He became my hero after that night. He doesn’t take crap from anyone.”

“Not when comes to his toys or his women,” Zach adds, then sips his beer.

“Women? As in plural?” I ask, turning to Zach. I’m joking with him… mostly.

“No, not plural. Woman. Only you, Mallory. He won’t take any shit when it comes to you. He tends to get protective over his…” Zach doesn’t finish that sentence, but with his eyes on me, I have a feeling he was going to say Evan’s possessions. My stronger side would take offense to it. My softer heart swoons. Damn romantic heart.

Zach clears his throat and looks at the others. “Since I’ve known Evan, he never cared enough about any other girls to want to fight for them.”

Sunny rubs his shoulder. “Mallory’s special.”

He leans over and kisses her on the cheek. “I feel the same about you.”

“Awww, honey, that’s so sweet.”

“Well, I think he’ll fit in fine at Boulder.” Josh turns to Zach and they start talking. “So how do you know, Evan?”

Zach sits up straighter. “We’ve known each other for years. We both grew up in New York, for the most part. Our families traveled a lot, but New York was our home base, same social circles and all that. We ran into each other again when he moved out to Hawaii a few years ago and basically had each other’s back ever since.” Zach looks at me. “He’s a good guy, but he’s lucky to have Mallory.”

“Here, here,” Sunny chimes in, holding her glass up in the air to toast.

The rest of the night is laid-back, and easy-going. It’s fun to hang out with my friends again. The more beer I drink the harder it is to keep my secret, especially with my best friends here. Evan and I promised to wait until after he got my dad’s blessing,
if
he gets his blessing, but I feel guilty for keeping such a huge secret from them.

The more I drink, the more the night feels incomplete or maybe it’s that
I
feel incomplete. I miss Evan and each day that passes magnifies that feeling. Doubts creep in that his mother will change her mind and try to keep us apart again. I take another two gulps and push those dark feelings down.

The night was fun, but I’m glad to be home. It’s the wee hours of the morning when my phone chirps, letting me know I have a text. Sunny dropped me off hours ago, so I know the only other person it can be. I touch the message icon and read:
Open your front door.

“Shit!” I scurry out of bed and run down the stairs. My hands are shaking with excitement, the deadbolt and chain becoming a nuisance while I roll my eyes in annoyance at my dad’s overprotective nature. When I finally get the locks undone, I throw the door open.

My breath catches as my gaze lands on Evan. He’s standing in front of me with snow in his hair, a sexy smirk on his face, and a bag in hand.

He drops the duffle bag, his own hands going into his pockets as if he’s holding himself back. “You really should get dressed before you answer the door. You’ve developed a bad habit.”

“I knew it was you,” I say, all smart-ass, putting my hands on my hips and pretending to be irritated.

“Well, in that case,” he says, taking a large step forward. One hand cups my cheek and the other weaves into my hair. His nose rubs slowly against mine as he takes in the features of my face at this close range. Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, his lips press lightly to mine, kissing me once, twice, three times, before murmuring, “God, I missed you, baby.”

“Babe, it’s two in the morning. How? Wha—”

“I couldn’t stay away any longer.”

I throw my arms around his neck, not caring that my chest gets a little wet from the snow on his clothes that melts between us. Closing my eyes, I inhale him into my system. Cold and shivering, I turn around, grabbing his hand tightly, and say, “Come inside.”

“Yeah, I don’t like you being outside in your skivvies when it’s cold like this. Get your sexy ass in there.” He smacks my ass when I turn toward the house.

I laugh as he follows me inside, but as soon as we’re inside the house, I put my finger in front of my mouth, silently telling him to be quiet. He looks at me and then whispers, “Should I get a hotel?”

Shaking my head, I point at the couch.

His shoulders fall in disappointment and he mouths, “Really? The couch?”

After setting his bag down, he turns back to me and a sweet smile appears. I go to him, unable to resist him. “I’ll tell you what,” I whisper, lifting up on my toes. “Leave your stuff here and come with me.” Taking him by the hand, I lead him up the stairs to my room, stopping to grab a towel out of the hall closet on the way. Carefully and quietly closing the door behind him, I turn my back to it and lean against the wood while locking it.

“Are you allowed to have boys in your room?” Evan looks at me and teases.

“Stop it.” I throw the towel and hit him on the chest.

He dries his hair, then tosses it on the bed. Taking two steps, closing the gap, Evan takes hold of my wrists with a tight grip and an intense gaze aimed at me. “I missed you.”

The words are rushed, but the same sentiment meant. “I missed you.” My breath comes heavily, my chest starting to rise slowly and fall deeply from the sexual tension.

Leaning down to my ear, he murmurs, his words just breaths shared between us. “I want you.” He releases my wrists and I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him, holding him close.

I pull him toward the bed, wanting him just as much. But he stops. Looking over my shoulder, he asks, “What is that?”

“What is what?” I ask, following his gaze.

“Seriously, is that a twin-sized bed?”

“This is the room I grew up in—”

“Okay, but weren’t you a teenager in this room at one time? Do teenagers sleep in twin beds?”

Releasing him, turned on and a little annoyed that we’re not already on that bed taking care of business, I look down at my body and sway my hands in the air. “I’m not exactly a giant here.”

“Good point.”

To get things back on track, I pull my shirt off and over my head. He takes his clothes off and I remove my shorts and stand there admiring his physique until he catches me, his eyes scanning over my body.

The bed creaks when we lay down. I switch off my lamp and we roll over to face each other trying to ignore the springs as they bear the brunt of our weight.

He wiggles his legs and says, “My feet hang off.”

“
Shhh
. I just want to look at you.” I caress his cheek.

He leans forward and places a kiss on my forehead. “My eyes haven’t adjusted to the dark yet.”

“
Shhh
, babe. Keep your voice down. I’m so happy you’re here, so just let me appreciate the moment, Mr. Complainey-Pants.”