Good Night, Sleep Tight Workbook
Read Good Night, Sleep Tight Workbook Online
Authors: Kim West
Tags: #Family & Relationships, #Life Stages, #Infants & Toddlers, #Parenting, #General
Table of Contents
Introduction
I’m Kim West, a licensed child and family therapist and the mother of two girls. My clients know me as The Sleep Lady®. For the past ten years, I’ve focused my practice on helping tens of thousands of weary, bleary-eyed parents all over the world find solutions to their children’s sleep problems—from babies who are old enough to sleep through the night but aren’t yet doing so, to nap-resistant toddlers, to older kids who won’t stay in their beds (or sneak into their parents’ beds uninvited). My method, the Sleep Lady® Shuffle, depends on step-by-step changes in the bedtime, nap time, and middle-of-the-night routines that haven’t been working for these families. For the parents of infants in particular, it’s a gentler alternative to letting their babies “cry it out.” Ultimately, the children I work with develop sleep “independence” and can drift off on their own and sleep soundly throughout the night, knowing that Mom and Dad are nearby.
What makes the Sleep Lady® method so successful is that it’s not a “one size fits all” approach to sleep coaching. When I work with a family individually, I factor in their values, lifestyle, and childrearing philosophies so as not to suggest something that might make parents feel uncomfortable. Doing so would be highly counterproductive—I can’t stress this enough—and so a plan that parents can’t stick with is bound to fail.
That said, the Sleep Lady® Shuffle is not an overnight cure. Essentially, you’re teaching your child a new skill. So be patient and remember that mastering a skill—whether it’s walking, handling a spoon, using the potty, or sleeping through the night—takes time. However, the families I work with solve the majority of their kids’ bedtime snafus within two weeks. (Issues like napping and early rising typically take a little longer.)
For the best results, I recommend that you read the first few chapters, plus the chapter that corresponds to your child’s age, of my book
Good Night, Sleep Tight
before you begin creating your plan (on page 46 of this workbook); at the very least, please read all the way through the workbook before you start sleep coaching your child. And remember: Your success will depend on consistency, follow-through, and patience, as well as 100 percent commitment on the part of everyone else who shares in caring for your child—including your partner, your child’s grandparents, and the sitter.
Good Night, Sleep Tight
before you begin creating your plan (on page 46 of this workbook); at the very least, please read all the way through the workbook before you start sleep coaching your child. And remember: Your success will depend on consistency, follow-through, and patience, as well as 100 percent commitment on the part of everyone else who shares in caring for your child—including your partner, your child’s grandparents, and the sitter.
May you enjoy many peaceful nights of sleep ahead!
Disclaimer: The information and advice presented in this book have been reviewed by a qualified pediatrician. It should not, however, substitute for the advice of your family doctor or other trained health care professionals. You are advised to consult with a health care professional with regard to all matters that may require medical attention or diagnosis for your baby or child, and you should check with a physician before administering or undertaking any course of treatment such as sleep training your baby or child.
Liam, age 1 day
CHAPTER ONE
Before You Begin
Sleep Coaching
Sleep Coaching
I firmly believe that a solid understanding of important sleep principles is key for a sleep-training plan to work. I realize you may be eager to get started and tempted to skip this chapter, but if you haven’t read
Good Night, Sleep Tight
, then this chapter (and the next) are
critical to your success
.
Good Night, Sleep Tight
, then this chapter (and the next) are
critical to your success
.
Even if you’ve read
Good Night, Sleep Tight
, skip down and review the chapters on
consistency
and
avoiding intermittent reinforcement
on pages 6-7. Given that we all need to hear things at least three times before we can
really
understand them, and the fact that you’re probably too tired to remember much these days anyway, it’s vital that you take the time to refresh your memory about these important concepts.
•
Regular sleep time is key.
Going to bed at the same time each night and getting up at the same time each morning is vital for children. The consistency keeps their internal body clock, a.k.a. circadian rhythm, on track, which in turn ensures that they get quality sleep. Even adults should have regular bed- and wake-up times;
it’s okay if we vary our own routine on weekends, but only by one hour.
If you miss your child’s natural time to sleep—in other words, her “sleep window”—her body will begin to secrete hormones, including one called cortisol, which acts like a mild form of adrenaline and can leave her too wired to get to sleep easily. (I imagine this must feel much like trying to nod off when you’re tired but have had too much caffeine.) Eventually, after you’ve both endured a good deal of crying, your child
will
fall asleep. “Thank goodness,” you’ll think, “at least she’ll sleep late tomorrow.” Logical, but incorrect. Having missed her regular bedtime, she’ll actually sleep
less
soundly and she’ll wake earlier than usual. This can then lead to poor naps the next day, a disrupted bedtime that night—and the beginning of a vicious cycle that will be tough to break.
will
fall asleep. “Thank goodness,” you’ll think, “at least she’ll sleep late tomorrow.” Logical, but incorrect. Having missed her regular bedtime, she’ll actually sleep
less
soundly and she’ll wake earlier than usual. This can then lead to poor naps the next day, a disrupted bedtime that night—and the beginning of a vicious cycle that will be tough to break.
•
Quality of sleep is just as important as quantity.
Besides the right amount of sleep (for age-by-age sleep requirements, see Chapter 2), a child needs:the right
kind
of sleep
—unfragmented, uninterrupted (except in the case of newborns who still need to nurse or take a bottle during the night), and motionless: the movement of, say, a baby swing prevents the brain from going into a deep sleep and is not as restorative.to sleep at the right times
—in other words, his bedtime, wake-up time, and naps are all in sync with his natural sleep patterns.sleep that’s undisturbed by medical problems
such as asthma, allergies, reflux, or obstructive sleep apnea or other physical sleep disorders.
•
Babies must be
taught
to put themselves to sleep: It’s a learned skill.
Putting your baby in her crib when she’s “drowsy but awake,” will give her the opportunity to get herself to sleep on her own. If you have trouble visualizing what “drowsy but awake” means, imagine a scale of one to ten, one being wide awake and ten being deeply asleep. You want to put your baby down at around a seven or eight on the drowsy scale. She should be warm, fed, comforted, and clearly sleepy, but alert enough to know that she’s going into the crib.
Other books
Orleans by Sherri L. Smith
Fragrance of Revenge by Dick C. Waters
Unhinge Me by Ann Montgomery
The Door to December by Dean Koontz
Silver by K.A. Linde
Sweep in Peace (Innkeeper Chronicles Book 2) by Ilona Andrews
Guilty Pleasures by Donna Hill
Carra: My Autobiography by Carragher, Jamie, Dalglish, Kenny
Stepbrother Studs Ian: A Stepbrother Romance by Selena Kitt