Goddess Sacrifice (17 page)

“Okay, baby.” He started stroking her hair again.

When she stopped crying again, she looked up at him. “I think I’m going to go to sleep now.”

“All right. I’ll leave after you fall asleep,” he murmured.

She shook her head. “No. You should leave now.”

“I don’t want to leave you, baby.”

“Please, River. I just want to be alone.”

He nodded as he sat up. She could tell he really didn’t want to leave, but he was trying to do the right thing for her. “Can I come by tomorrow?”

She shook her head. “It’s Thanksgiving. I’m sure you have family here.”

“I don’t care about that.”

“I just need some time,” she whispered.

“Umm, how about Friday?”

She sighed and nodded. Friday felt too soon, but she knew he’d keep pressing her until she agreed to a day when he could come over. She just didn’t have the energy to come up with reasons for him not to.

He nodded back. “Okay, I’ll be here Friday morning.”

She fell asleep right after River left, but she still didn’t sleep well. She was getting used to lack of sleep and lack of food.

When she got up the next morning, she smelled food cooking. She wasn’t sure why Lissa was going through the trouble of cooking Thanksgiving dinner for just the two of them, but it wasn’t as if there was anything else she could do. Cooking gave Lissa something to focus on since she was of no help to Legacy in her state of despair.

She took a shower and got dressed, crying most of the time. It was almost noon before she even came downstairs. Lissa was so busy in the kitchen that she didn’t hear her walk in.

“Hi,” she whispered.

Lissa twirled around. “Legacy, you’re just in time.” She was putting lids on the side dishes, and the desserts were in carrying cases.

“What’s going on?”

“We’re going to Thanksgiving dinner.”

What? Her eyes got big. “Going?”

“Yes. Since it’s just the two of us, we were invited to spend Thanksgiving next door.”

She gasped, shaking her head. They knew all of their neighbors, but they only visited with one, and she wasn’t ready to face Adin and his family.

Lissa sighed as she stepped over to her. “I know this is going to be hard for you, but you can’t spend the rest of your life crying in your bedroom.”

“
He
is going to be there, though,” she whispered.

“I know,” she said sincerely. “Now, grab the cheesecake,” she said matter-of-factly as she walked over to the counter and picked up the dishes she’d prepared.

Legacy slowly walked over and picked up the desserts, following Lissa out of the kitchen. As they walked out of the house and toward Rose’s, each step was more difficult than the last. She felt her breathing hitch as she fought back the tears, but some leaked over anyway. When they got to the door, she tried breathing slowly, but she was shaking all over.

Lissa knocked, and Rose opened the door.

“Happy Thanksgiving! I’m so happy you could make it,” she said as Lissa walked in and Rose hugged her.

When Lissa walked away, Rose looked at Legacy with a half-smile. Then she put her arms around her. “Thank you for coming,” she whispered.

When she pulled away, Legacy nodded at her. She knew if she opened her mouth, she’d cry.

She followed Lissa into the kitchen to put up the food. Myrha was in there finishing the other dishes. She turned to Lissa and hugged her as she took the food from her hands. Then she turned to Legacy and walked over, putting her arms around her. “I’m glad you’re here. Adin is in his room if you want to go see him,” she whispered.

She shook her head faintly, and Myrha frowned, but nodded in understanding. At least she wasn’t throwing daggers at her for breaking her son’s heart.

“We’re eating in the dining room if you want to take your seat,” Rose said.

“Okay,” Legacy mumbled.

She walked into the dining room and sat in the corner. It was a round table, but she wanted to be facing the door when Adin walked in.

Rose, Myrha, and Lissa put the food on the table. Then Lissa took a seat by her, and Myrha took a seat by Lissa. Rose didn’t come right in, so she figured she went to get Adin.

When she heard two sets of footsteps coming down the hall, her heart raced, and she looked down, taking a deep breath.

“You’ll be fine,” Lissa whispered to her.

But she couldn’t look at her. Hers eyes flashed to the door, waiting. Gods, she was such a masochist.

Rose walked in first and immediately took the seat next to Myrha. That only left one empty seat—the one right beside her.

Chapter Fourteen

When Adin walked into view, silent tears streamed down Legacy’s cheeks. He was looking down, but she could see the expression on his face. He looked tormented, and she knew it was her fault. She wiped her tears away and stared at him. He glanced up quickly to find his seat, and his eyes went straight to the empty seat beside her. He looked back down as he took a step, but then he stopped. His head shot back up, immediately making eye contact with her.

She stared at him for a second, and then she looked down. She was trying to breathe slowly, but the air felt very shallow. After several seconds had passed, Adin was still frozen. She was sure his eyes were still locked onto her, but she couldn’t look at him.

“Sit down, Dinny, so we can eat,” Rose said.

“Er…yes, ma’am,” he said softly.

Oh gods! The sound of his voice was heart-wrenching. She took a jagged breath and glanced toward Lissa.

She reached over, patted Legacy’s knee, and she half-smiled at her.

When Adin walked over to his seat, Legacy’s heart was crashing in her chest. It was so loud she just knew everyone in this room could hear it, including him.

As Adin pulled out his chair and took his seat, he leaned over to her. “Hi,” he whispered slowly.

Oh, the sound of his voice and the smell of his breath were much sweeter than she remembered. “Hi,” she said quickly, tilting her head in his direction, but not looking at him.

After he was seated, they said grace and passed the food around. She didn’t put much on her plate because she knew it’d be wasted anyway. Even if she could keep food down, she was too nervous to really eat. She could hear Adin’s heavy breaths beside her, so that wasn’t helping her emotional state either.

The three women at the table talked amongst themselves, shooting a question at Adin or at her when they could, but he and she didn’t talk to each other. She wasn’t eating, and although she didn’t look at him, she did notice that he wasn’t eating either. She had never been this uncomfortable around him, even when she had her obsessive crush before they had started dating.

She picked up her fork and played with her food, psyching herself up to eat because she was pretty sure what would happen when she started. She was in the middle of her mental pep talk when Rose addressed the table.

“I think we all should say something that we are thankful for.”

Legacy’s head shot up.
Ugh, this could not be happening!
What did she have to be thankful for right now? A broken heart? Powers so unruly that she’d kill the man she loved? A best friend that was probably planning his future with her right now? No, thanks!

She dropped her fork and looked over at Lissa, but she wasn’t the one who came to her rescue.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Grandma.”

Legacy sighed, shutting her eyes at the sound of Adin’s voice. She’d ripped their lives apart, and he still wanted to protect her.

“Er, okay. Maybe later,” Rose murmured.

Legacy picked up her fork again and tried to eat her food, not because she wanted to, but because it gave her something to focus on. But whenever her fork hit her plate and came up to her mouth, she could see how badly she was shaking.

She’d only had a few bites of mashed potatoes when she put her fork down, so she hadn’t eaten much when the nausea kicked in. She rubbed her forehead as she stared at her food. She felt the need to vomit, but she was trying to stay calm.

“Is everything all right, dear?” Rose asked. She knew Adin’s head shot in her direction because now she could feel his breath hitting her. It was the first time since he sat down that he looked directly at her.

She knew that Rose had asked her a question, but she couldn’t answer her. She didn’t want to open her mouth. When she didn’t answer, Lissa rubbed her leg again and answered for her. “Legacy has had a hard time keeping food down these last few days.”

She leaned back in her chair and covered her face, taking deep breaths. It didn’t work, she started to gag.

She jumped up and ran for the bathroom, but she wasn’t alone. She heard someone running right behind her, and she knew it was Adin.

She dropped to floor in front of the toilet and threw up violently as Adin fell beside her, holding up her hair. When she finished, she clung to the toilet as she cried. Even though she hated the thought of Adin seeing her like this, she loved the feel of his hands, and that he was comforting her.

But she wasn’t the only one crying. Adin cried as she cried, and he continued crying while he got up and grabbed a washcloth. Then he started cleaning her up while he tried controlling his emotions. As he worked, she could tell that he was trying very hard not to look into her eyes.

After he finished, she tried to stand up, and Adin helped her.

“You’re trembling,” he whispered.

She shrugged. “I-I’m weak.” She knew that wasn’t the only reason. She was already nervous being at his grandma’s house with him, but she was extremely nervous being this close to him with him touching her.

She bent over the sink and washed her face and rinsed out her mouth.

“I, um, still have your toothbrush in my bathroom if you want to brush your teeth.”

She glanced up at him, and he looked at her with his sad eyes. She nodded, looking away from him.

Adin walked out of the bathroom, and she followed him to his bedroom and into his bathroom while she watched her feet. He opened the cabinet and pulled out the toothbrush and toothpaste. Then he walked back out without looking at her, and she cried again while brushing her teeth.

When she finished, she walked into his bedroom without looking up. She couldn’t look at his room. It was bad enough looking at her own room every day and reliving all the memories of him in there. She continued walking over to his door, but it was shut with Adin standing in front of it. She stopped a few feet in front of him, but continued to look at the floor.

“When’s the last time you kept any food down?” he asked softly.

“It was before that day,” she said without looking at him. He knew what day she was talking about.

“That’s too long to go without eating, Legacy.”

“I’ve tried to eat.” She shrugged.

She glanced up at him, and he was looking at the floor too, but when her head came up, he looked into her eyes.

“Umm, what have you tried eating?”

“Everything, I guess.”

“You should try to eat again,” he whispered.

Her breathing hitched, so she covered her face before she started crying. She didn’t want to cry in front of him again, but she couldn’t help it. Here she was in front of the man she loved, the man whose heart she had ripped apart, and he was trying to help her.

“S-sweetheart,” Adin whispered as his voice hitched. “I’m worried about you.”

She took a deep breath and slid her hands from her face. “I’ll be f-fine.”

Adin sighed, wiping his tears. “Let’s go to the kitchen and find you something that you can keep down.” He didn’t wait for her to respond. He turned around and opened the door, leading the way to the kitchen, and she was a little relieved that he hadn’t led her back in the dining room with everybody else.

When she walked in, she sat at the table, trying not to watch him rummage around, but she watched anyway. He pulled out some saltine crackers and clear juice and walked over to the table.

He handed her the items he’d picked out as he sat down beside her, and she looked down as she started eating.

“How soon do you feel like you’re going to throw up before it actually happens?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugged.

“Do you feel any different right before it happens?”

“Um, yeah. I get really hot.”

Adin nodded while she continued eating the crackers.

After a few more bites, she started to feel hot again. She put the crackers down and put her hands on her face, taking deep breaths. Adin immediately scooted over to her and pulled her hands down, staring into her eyes. Then he leaned in closer and blew his cold breath on her face. She shut her eyes and gasped. Adin kept blowing on her face until she started to relax. She wasn’t sure if it was the cold air that was countering the hot, nauseated feeling or if it was the sweet smell of his breath washing over her face that did the trick, but something worked.

“I think that’s good,” she whispered.

He leaned away from her and got up. He walked over to the refrigerator and put some ice in a towel, and then he walked back over to her and sat down, waiting for her to continue eating.

She picked up the crackers and started eating again. After about two bites, the whirl of nausea hit her much faster and she gagged. Adin immediately put one hand on the side of her throat and the other hand holding the towel of ice on her forehead.

His quick action startled her, so her eyes flashed to his, but he was watching his hand rub the ice on her face. His other hand holding onto her neck felt heavenly, but she tried not to think about his touch.

After several seconds, the spell passed again without her vomiting.

“Let’s try something more nutritious,” Adin whispered as he put the ice down and stood up. He walked into the dining room and brought back two plates. He put one in front of her and one in front of his seat as he sat down.

He watched her as she took a bite of her vegetables, then he took bite of his food. She got a few more bites in when she felt the heat wave hit her again, and when she quickly dropped her fork, Adin instantly had the ice on her face, holding her neck.