Given (Give &Take) (18 page)

“Yeah.” She sat on the step. So much for getting moving again. “I’ve always wondered what would’ve happened if I would’ve said no to disappearing. If I would’ve stayed and you had known about the babies.”

“Gina, I was barely a teenager when they were born. We could hardly have gotten married or played house together.” Where the hell was this heading?

“No. I know. I just mean, maybe when we were older, things could’ve been different. We might have wanted to try to make it work.”

Sirens blared in my head. A voice screamed,
Abort! Abort!
This mission had gone terribly wrong. “I don’t know.”

“Is it so hard to imagine? My parents were in the same social circle as your father. If he hadn’t paid my parents to send me away, we probably would’ve had the same friends. I bet it would’ve happened.”

“Gina…” I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. We’re here now. There’s no going back.”

“Isn’t there?” She stood up and sauntered over to me. “I wonder what it would be like now… if we were together. If I seduced you like I did back then.” She ran a fingernail down my jaw and under my chin.

“Don’t,” I said, catching her by the wrist. “I’m with Rachael. We’re getting married.”

“Are you sure?” She tilted her head and kissed my neck.

I jerked back. “Let’s get going. This is over.”

Gina took my hand. “It’s not too late. You’re not married
yet. We could try to make our family work.” She played with my fingers. I gritted my teeth. “Nadia wants this so badly. She’s always been a dreamer. MJ would be more accepting of me if you were more accepting. I want our kids to be happy, Merrick. I want to be part of their lives with you. We’ll be grandparents someday. We could take family trips to Disney World and spoil our grandkids rotten, rock them to sleep when they spend the night. Take them out for ice cream on Sunday evenings. Doesn’t that sound like fun?”

This was mind-blowing. It really seemed like she was being sincere. I would have to crush her and Nadia. She was right about MJ, too. He’d be more accepting of her if I was. I’d rob her of that as well.

Why did this woman have to come into my life now? If she’d proposed this before I met Rachael, I would’ve probably given it a shot. It would be the least I could do. She was the mother of my kids after all. If I were single, what would I have to lose? But now, there was Rachael, and there was no going back from Rachael.

“It’s not going to happen, Gina. I’m sorry.”

She let out a little snort of laughter. “Well, when you come to your senses and realize that your wife—if you get that far—is never going to accept your daughter and vice versa and that drives a wedge so far between the two of you that there’s no alternative but to call it quits, you’ll know where to find me.”

“Is this what you want, or what Nadia wants? Is she
trying to come between Rachael and me intentionally?” Before she could answer, I held up a hand. “You know what? It doesn’t matter. It won’t work.”

I turned and strode back to the bike, got on, and waited for her to get behind me. When she was on and holding tight, I took off. Her hands stroked my chest and my stomach. She pressed her breasts into my back. This woman was unbelievable.

Instead of going all the way around the island, I stopped back at the hotel. I’d take the bike back to the boathouse later. This ride was over.

Without a word, I got off and bolted toward the door into the lounge. I wanted that woman off this island and had to find a way to make her leave.

Nadia was answering her cell phone when I walked in. I waved to get her attention and tell her I was going upstairs when her face went pale, she let out a shriek and dropped her phone.

“No!” she cried.

I ran to her and took her in my arms. “What? What happened?”

She looked up at me with wide, horrified eyes. “He’s dead.”

N
adia cried out, sending me straight up in bed. I put my book down and hustled out of the bedroom and down the stairs. She sat on the sofa sobbing in Merrick’s arms. Gina knelt in front of her holding her hand. It was a touching scene—for a mother, father, and daughter.

I leaned in the doorway and stayed out of their way.

Nadia took great, shaky breaths trying to calm down enough to speak. Finally, after Gina’s coos and hair stroking, she collected herself enough to tell them what was going on.

“Paul?” Merrick asked.

She shook her head. “Grandfather. Enzo. He’s dead!”

The shock of her words hit me as she broke into a sobbing fit again. Frozen where I stood, I watched Gina sink to the floor, hold her head in her hands, and begin to cry. “No,” she sobbed, “it can’t be true. No!”

Merrick, the only calm one among us, took Nadia by the shoulders. “Who was on the phone?”

“The housekeeper in Spain. Enzo has a villa there. She found him this morning. She tried to call Mom first. They think it was an aneurysm, but they want to do an autopsy.”

Gina let out a howl like a dying cat. I felt terrible for her—for anyone who suffered a loss like this. Merrick sat Nadia back against the cushions and helped Gina to the sofa beside her. As he stood, his eyes found me.

“I’ll get hot tea or something,” I said, and turned for the kitchen.

I was taking tea bags out of the drawer when he came in. We just stared at each other. “Are you okay?” I asked.

“It—” He shrugged. “I don’t know what to think.”

He looked so lost. I went to him and took him in my arms. “No matter what went on between the two of you, he was your father. You can be upset, you know.”

He kissed the top of my head. “I know. It hasn’t hit me yet. How do I know it’s really true? After all he’s done—”

“It wouldn’t be below him to fake his own death. I know.” I hated what I was about to suggest, but it was all I could think of that might ease his mind. “Do you want to go over and see him before the burial?”

“No.” He shook his head hard. “Absolutely not. Gina, Nadia, and my sister can go and handle everything.”

“Okay.”

A chapter was finally closed, but Enzo’s death left loose ends. Gina and Nadia. I was certain he’d left them set financially, so that wasn’t a concern, but would they go back to Europe now that the man who had been controlling their lives was gone?

“I better fix the tea,” I said, pulling away. “Do you know what will happen to the Rocha Estate?” The big Tudor house
outside Atlanta was where Merrick grew up. He’d been back only once as an adult.

“I don’t know. Someone should tell Mr. Simcoe, Maddie, and MJ.” He leaned against the counter and rubbed a hand over his head.

“I’ll call. You take the tea in and keep Nadia and Gina calm.” I poured the hot water over the tea bags in three mugs. “I’m sure Beck will fly them over as soon as they hear.”

He blinked a few times, bewildered, still taking everything in. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me.” I stroked his cheek. “I love you.”

He took my hand and kissed my palm. “I love you, too.”

I didn’t want to leave him, but knew he had an obligation to be with Nadia right now, and given my rocky relationship with her, it wasn’t the best time for me to intrude.

“I’ll go upstairs and make the call.” I rose up on my tiptoes, took his face in my hands, and kissed him. I wanted to convey so much in that kiss. That I was sorry, that he could depend on me, that I’d never leave him.

Upstairs, I stood in front of the open window beside the bed and dialed MJ’s number. He answered on the third ring. “Hello?”

“MJ, it’s Rachael. I have something to tell you.”

“This doesn’t sound good. What’s wrong?”

“Everyone here is fine, but Nadia got a phone call a little while ago. Enzo’s dead.”

There was a pause. I wasn’t sure he was still on the line. “MJ?”

“I’m here. Wow. I wasn’t expecting that.”

“It was sudden. He was in Spain. They’re saying it was an aneurysm.”

“How’s Merrick taking it?”

“He’s still processing it, I think.” I rested my forehead against the windowpane and closed my eyes.

“I’ll let Maddie and her dad know and ask Beck to fly us over.”

“Okay.”

“And Rachael? Thanks for being there for him through everything. I know having Nadia and Gina there has to be hard enough. Now this. He’d be lost without you.”

“There’s nowhere else I want to be.” My chest swelled with hope. Hope that our future could get back on track.

“We’ll see you soon.”

As soon as Beck dropped off MJ, Maddie, and Mr. Simcoe, he was off again with Nadia and Gina.

Their departure was rushed, but Gina didn’t miss her chance to kiss Merrick on the cheek and tell him she was sorry. Nadia hadn’t stopped crying. Merrick held her tight and gently swayed back and forth like a parent does a small child to settle them. He kissed her forehead and helped them both into the helicopter before saying good-bye. Neither
one of them said a word of good-bye to me. I didn’t hold it against them due to their grief. I just hoped they never returned.

Beck clapped Merrick on the back. “I’ll be back in a day or so, and we’ll have a few beers.”

Merrick, hands in pockets, shrugged. “I’m good, man.”

“Yeah. I know you are.” Beck climbed up in the helicopter, and the rest of us backed away so he could get the propellers going.

As they lifted off into the air, they took all my anxiety and doubt with them. My home, my island, my Merrick—they were all mine again.

Once we were back at the hotel, Merrick, MJ, Maddie, Mr. Simcoe, and I sat on the patio. “I hate to say it,” Mr. Simcoe said, “but Enzo and I had some good times.”

Maddie huffed. “Dad, he put you in the hospital. You didn’t forget that, did you? It was only a couple months ago.”

“No, I didn’t forget. I choose to remember the good times, too, out of respect for the departed. We spent a lot of time on the golf course together.”

“I don’t have any good memories,” MJ said. “He shipped me off to boarding school and spent summers annoyed that I had to be under his roof.”

Merrick sat back in his chair with his arms crossed. “What about you?” I asked him. “Anything from when you were a kid that’s a good memory?”

He sat there for a moment and didn’t say anything. I
didn’t think he would. Then he leaned forward and clasped his hands together. “He loved my mom. He wasn’t an evil bastard until she died. That’s all I can say for him.”

“What about you?” MJ asked me. “You met him.”

“What do I have to say about Enzo?” This was tricky. The man ruined the life of everyone he came across, made a game of it. But he was dead and nothing I could say would make a difference. “He kept a very organized office.”

Merrick looked at me out of the corner of his eye, smirking before chuckling. “He kept an organized office.”

The rest of them started laughing, and before I knew it, we were all holding our stomachs, cracking up. It was a dumb thing to say, but I was glad I said it for lack of anything else.

As night fell, we all took solace in our rooms. Merrick and I held each other under the soft, white sheet and watched the moon climb high in the sky through the window. We didn’t speak, because there was nothing to say that couldn’t wait. We were content, our problems not solved, but out of our line of sight for now. The time would come when we’d have to talk about us, when we’d have to face our future and what it looked like, but not tonight.

T
here was a heaviness I didn’t expect to feel when my father died. I hated the man and that was no exaggeration. He’d ruined my life and wouldn’t have stopped ruining it if he’d lived, so with that heaviness was a relief that was wrapped in guilt like some morbid gift from the dead.

I worried about Mr. Simcoe. He’d considered Enzo his best friend until recently. I don’t think he’d come to terms with his former best friend physically assaulting him and now Enzo was dead. Mr. Simcoe was the type of man who needed to forgive and find resolution. He’d get none now.

Rachael would say I needed to find forgiveness and closure myself. She might be right, but there wasn’t a way to do that. I couldn’t say my piece to a dead man. There were so many questions I’d never get answers to. The biggest: Why did he hate me?

It didn’t matter, though. I should’ve thanked him for being such a bastard. It taught me how not to be a father. To be the best dad I could be to MJ and Nadia, all I had to do was the exact opposite of what my father would do. I
wanted to encourage them and help them, always be there and believe in their dreams.

Someday I hoped there would be more kids to be a good dad to, to see grow from infants to little kids, teenagers into adults.

Enzo’s autopsy came back conclusive of an aneurysm. He’d gone out of this world as he should have: alone and suffering. I’d called Nadia every day in the week since his death. She was coping and over the initial shock of the news. She and Gina were staying on in Spain until Enzo’s will was read, which was to take place this afternoon. They asked me to attend, but it seemed unlikely that I’d get the properties back he’d bought out from under me, so I elected to say where I belonged on Turtle Tear. MJ outright refused to go. He, Maddie, Beck, and Joan were flying in anytime now.

From where I lay in the hammock under the pool cloister, I could just make out Rachael in the distance talking with a man from a company that installed zip lines. She’d booked her first corporate outing on the island, and they were looking for team-building activities. Never one to disappoint, Rachael was rising to the challenge.

I needed to talk to her, but I was afraid of pushing. I told her we’d postpone the wedding until she came to terms with the new dynamics of my life with Nadia and Gina—who I hoped stayed in Spain for the rest of her life. I’d already gone against my plan and proposed too soon. I couldn’t let my gut talk me into something I knew in my
head was wrong. She needed time and she wasn’t going anywhere. I could make myself sit back and wait.

Not that it was easy. We walked around like nothing stood between us, ignoring the giant lingering in the shadows. I had a feeling Rachael was waiting for me to initiate another conversation, but we were both stubborn and at a standstill until one of us gave in.

When I heard the helicopter approaching, I got off the hammock and fired up the Harley to get me to the landing pad. Rachael glanced over and I waved, letting her know I was on my way to meet everyone.

The day was humid and overcast, pressure burgeoning in the clouds. By nightfall, a storm would set in over the island. I was glad Beck got them here before it hit.

I rounded a corner in the path and pulled ahead of the trees. The helicopter was in full view, descending, blowing the tall grass flat.

It wasn’t Beck. It was the helicopter Gina had arrived in. What the hell was she doing back?

I pulled to the side and killed the bike’s engine. Once the copter was on the ground and the propellers stopped, the pilot climbed out. He lifted a hand and strode toward me. Looking closer, I didn’t see anyone else flying with him.

I met him halfway. “Hello, Mr. Rocha,” he said, and extended his hand, holding an envelope. “From Ms. Montgomery.”

If I could’ve refused it, I would’ve. Instead, I took it. “Thanks.”

“She says to read it in private.” He nodded and turned, heading back to his bird.

It had to be news from Enzo’s will.

I wanted to burn it and never know what it said inside.

I folded the envelope in half, tucked it in my back pocket, and cranked the throttle on the bike, eager to blow off some steam.

Beck landed at a little after six in the evening when I was in the boathouse polishing the Harley. I helped the five of them drag themselves and their suitcases into the hotel. MJ was in a mood and I could tell it was affecting all of them.

Mr. Simcoe immediately took off to examine his flower beds, rose pruners in hand. “He’s been driving the landscapers crazy,” Maddie said irritably, plopping down at the kitchen table.

Rachael came bustling into the kitchen and hugged MJ. “I’m sorry for your loss,” she said.

He turned away, face shadowed by his dark temper. “I didn’t lose anything.”

She looked at me and tilted her head toward him as if to say,
Talk to him.

I knew he was hurting even if the old man had treated him like shit. Enzo raised him—if you call shuttling him off to boarding schools raising him.

I put a hand on Beck’s shoulder. “How about that beer now? MJ, have a cold one with us.”

MJ leaned against the counter. “Yeah. Sure. Whatever.”

Joan beat me to the fridge and handed me the beer bottles. “Good luck,” she whispered. “For what it’s worth, I think karma did the bastard in.” She strode away, over to the table, to sit beside Maddie. I was glad she didn’t wait for a reply, because really, what was there to say? Joan had always been pretty perceptive.

I ran a hand down Rachael’s back as I walked past her and headed out to the patio with Beck and MJ. With the man she loathed dead and the two women she wanted gone, gone, I left her to a proper celebratory chat with Joan and Maddie. I could only imagine that conversation.

Leaning back in my chair, I cracked open my beer and took a long pull from the bottle. It burned going down it was so cold, but it went down easy. I had a feeling before this night was over, I’d kill a few of these soldiers.

Beck looked relaxed sitting there between MJ and me. I swear, nothing could rattle him. Not even death. MJ held his bottle on the table like it might escape, picking the label with his thumbnail. “Conflicted?” I asked.

He raised his eyes to me. “What?”

“I said, are you conflicted? I am. The man was a fucking asshole. I hated him for most of my life. Still, he was the only father I had. Now he’s dead. What am I supposed to do with that?”

MJ let out a snort of derision. “Yeah. What the fuck do you do with that?”

“So you feel me then,” I said, and took another long drink from my bottle.

He tipped his own back and drank. “Yeah,” he said, “I feel ya.”

“Glad we’re in this together.” I reached across and tapped the neck of his bottle with mine. Enzo took everything I had, but he was dead and gone and I still had MJ and Beck, Rachael, Turtle Tear, Nadia. I had my friends, my family, and my home. Enzo’s reign of terror had been broken.

“You two sorry saps about done crying in your beer?” Beck asked, propping one foot up on his opposite knee. “Or are we going to drink to the fact that the man who took everything away from you, Merrick, including your son and daughter, is dead? I, for one, will be happy to spit out a big old loogie on his grave.”

MJ chuckled. “I won’t stop you.”

“Like you could, Junior. Where are they burying him anyway? Might want to get some voodoo priestess in on that shit. Keep him from roaming around haunting people.”

“Not sure, but now is as good a time as any to find out.” I pulled the envelope from my back pocket. “Gina sent this earlier today. I haven’t opened it yet.”

“No time like the present,” Beck said, sitting forward.

Like me, MJ eyed the letter like there might be a viper tucked inside ready to strike as soon as I unsealed the flap. He felt me, all right. We were of one mind.

I took a deep breath and groaned as I exhaled, ripping the end of the envelope open. Inside there were four pages folded together. On top of the first page I read the words:
Last Will and Testament.
“No,” I whispered. “Why did she send me this?”

“What is it?” MJ asked, staring at me like he didn’t really want to know.

“A copy of Enzo’s will. At least part of it.” I flipped through the pages. One section was highlighted. There was a sticky note stuck to the page right under the highlighted section.
I’m sorry
was written in feminine handwriting.

I put the other three pages down on the table and focused on the emphasized sentences.

I read them once. The message didn’t register. What was this telling me?

I read them twice. No. It couldn’t be true. Nobody would do that.

I read them a third time and felt my heart stop beating in my chest for a moment. “Jesus. No.”

My hand holding the page dropped to my lap. I stared at MJ across the table. It couldn’t be true. But it was. I knew it was. Not because it said so in Enzo’s will, but because I felt it in my soul to be the truth.

“What is it?” MJ asked, brows creased in concern.

“You.” I held up the paper and shook my head.

“What do you mean, me?”

“You’re not my son. You’re my brother.”

“What?” He bolted from his chair and snatched the
paper from my hand. I watched as his eyes scanned over the same section mine had, not once, or twice, but three times. “I don’t—why? How?”

I dropped my head into my hands. It was unbelievable. “They set me up. Dad was screwing the babysitter, knocked her up, and they pinned it on me. Shit. No wonder I don’t remember much about being with her. Other than the fact that I was too young to know what the hell I was doing—I… Jesus. I didn’t get her pregnant.”

Beck stood up and started pacing. “This is fucking crazy. I mean like soap opera crazy. This doesn’t happen in real life.”

MJ read the page again, shaking his head. “He was my father? The whole time. He didn’t want me around. Talked to me like I was a piece of shit. I was his son.” He wadded up the page and slammed it on the table.
“I was his fucking son!”

A second later, Maddie came running out, followed by Rachael and Joan. Maddie took one look at MJ and me, and panic spread across her face. “What’s wrong?”

Beck took Joan by the arm and hauled her back inside. I held my hand out to Rachael. “Enzo left us a confession in his will.”

I felt my heart cracking. I didn’t lose MJ, but he wasn’t my son. I’d come to terms with him as my own and took pride in having him call me Dad. Now I find out it was another lie. Rachael looked right through me. She saw the hurt. It reflected on her own face. “What?” she whispered, already horrified by what she didn’t know.

“I’m not his son,” MJ said, pissed. “We’re brothers.”

“What?” Maddie gripped MJ’s arms. “What do you mean, brothers?”

“I mean, Enzo was my father. He was the one who got Gina pregnant.” His fists were clenched and his face was red. He wanted to punch something. I’d had that feeling more times in my life than I could count. But not now. Right now I wanted to cry.

“So,” Rachael said, stunned, “he’s your brother and Nadia’s your sister?”

It was the wrong time to say it. “Yeah, you’re rid of her. Congratulations. You don’t have to be a stepmom after all.” I flung the words at her and saw them hit, like a physical blow. I couldn’t help it. I’d lost a son—even if I did gain a brother—and the first thing she says has to do with Nadia not being mine as well? It got right under my skin and dug in deep.

“That’s not what I meant,” she said, but her hopeful tone when she’d said it told me otherwise.

She picked up the rest of the pages and scanned through them. Her eyes got wide, blinking double time. “Did you bother to read the rest of this?”

“No. I kind of stopped at the highlighted section and hadn’t gotten passed it yet.”

She shoved the pages into my chest. “You have one fourth of your properties back. Gina, Nadia, and MJ get the other three fourths.
And
he wants his ashes sprinkled here. By you.”

“What?” Disbelieving, I grasped the papers and read for myself. I didn’t care about the properties. I’d resigned myself to being without my company. But why would he want me to spread his ashes here? “I don’t get it. It doesn’t make sense.”

“One last way to control you,” MJ said. “To make you do something you don’t want to do. He’ll be here with you after death.”

“You can’t do it,” Maddie said, both hands to her face, fingers pressed to her lips.

“He has to.” Rachael crossed her arms and held my eyes with hers. “It’s the only way to let go. He doesn’t have control. Just because he requested something in his will doesn’t mean you have to do it.”

“And how does doing what he wants give me control?” For the first time ever, I was suffering and it felt like she didn’t understand me. Rachael always understood me. I didn’t need this on top of the shit pile I’d been served.

“You’re doing it on your terms, knowing you don’t have to and that there are no consequences if you don’t. If you do it, it’s because you’re able to face this last challenge he’s given you. If you don’t, he’s still able to get inside you and you let him win.”