Fury of the Demon (Kara Gillian) (17 page)

“Zack is on the property adding warding to the perimeter,” she told me. “He is coming in.”

I didn’t try to respond. I curled on my side, focused on telling myself over and over that this was wrong. I backed off when I felt the fear about to drown me and pushed more when it receded. I danced the dance.

A few minutes later, Zack crouched beside me. “Kara, I’m here. Ryan will be here in a minute.”

“I’m fine,” I insisted, shivering. “I’m cool.”

“You are
sooo
fine, and the coolest,” Zack said, light tone tinged with worry. “It’s why Ryan is coming to see you.”

I gave a nod. “Yeah. Sure,” I said. “This is
wrong
.” Terror flared, and I gasped out a whimper. I backed off and did my best to keep dancing.

I heard the door, then Ryan’s voice. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Zack stood. “Kara ran into some trouble with Farouche,” he told Ryan. “You know how you do the memory shift thing? I think she needs help like that. He’s got some sort of fear compulsion bullshit going on with her. You up for giving it a try?”

My nails dug into my palms as I clenched my hands hard. “Hurry,” I said, then hissed through my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut. This was nothing,
nothing
, compared to what Rhyzkahl had done to me. I silently repeated that over and over, still barely able to hold on against the rising tide of fear.

“Damn right I’ll try.” Ryan shoved the coffee table out of the way and helped me sit up, then crouched in front of me and took my head between his hands in a firm grip. “Hang in there, Kara,” he said. His eyes locked on mine, and a heartbeat later his face went stony, and his jaw tightened. Ryan couldn’t read minds—if he could, Zack wouldn’t let him anywhere near me since he’d pick up the truth about Ryan/Szerain—but he could feel
into
a person and muddle recent memories. Ryan considered it a quirky talent. In reality it was a hint of Szerain’s mind reading and manipulation ability that bled through. The hope intruded that Szerain could surface enough to actually neutralize this, yet terror followed close in its wake.

I gripped Ryan’s wrists and gave a half-hearted tug. “I’m fine!”

“Hold still, damn it,” he said, mouth tight in concentration. “This is . . . I don’t know.”

Sick fear rose, and I tried harder to pull his hands away. “No. I’m okay. Really.”

Wasn’t I?

Vertigo struck as a fragment of the dream flooded me. I threw my arms wide as my inner world tipped, and I lost my footing on the plain of glass.

Memory whispered like falling sand.

Rowan
.

“Kara!” Zack said forcefully. “
Kara
. Be still.” His voice cut through the fear and the dance and the dream and all of the bullshit. I dropped my hands to my sides, clenched them in the fabric of the couch.

Ryan shifted his grip. “You’re not okay. This doesn’t feel right. I don’t understand what it is, but I’m going to try to make it feel like . . . you. Do your best to relax.”

I unclenched my hands and tried to focus on something,
anything
besides fear or not-fear or the horrible sense of my Self sliding into oblivion. The cat hissed at me again. Fuzzykins. I could focus on our mutual-hate relationship. I closed my eyes, imagined a world without cats who wanted to claw my face off.

The next thing I knew, Ryan withdrew his hands from my head. “That feels better to me now,” he said. I opened my eyes to see him peering at me critically. “How are you doing?”

I shook my head to clear it. The cat wasn’t on the sofa anymore. “Wow. That was totally bizarre.” Frowning, I rubbed my temples. “It’s still there, but not at all like before.”

Ryan sat beside me. “What the hell happened?”

I gave him the rundown about the roadblock and the conversation with Farouche. “Ryan, it was crazy. There was one time when it seemed as if he read my thoughts, but mostly it was like he could tell whether or not I was telling the truth, and he narrowed my answers down to what he wanted to know.” I shook my head. “All that’s bad enough, but he has this fear thing going on too. When he told me to call him when Thatcher and Paul got back, the mere
thought
of disobeying him was utterly terrifying.” I rubbed at my temples. “It’s still there, but muffled. I can handle it, at least for now.”

“That sounds like what Paul and Mzatal told you about,” he said. “I didn’t really get it before, but damn, it really had you.”

“Looks like Farouche’s halo is pretty fucking tarnished,” I said.

“He’s very dangerous,” Zack agreed. “Now that you’re stable, I’m going to go back and finish my perimeter inspection.”

“Thanks, Zack,” I said. “I have some things I need to talk to you about. I’ll check in with you in a bit.”

He gave me a nod and disappeared out the door.

“Are you going to be all right?” Ryan asked, concern in his eyes.

I gave him a reassuring nod. “That shook me up, but I’m good now. I’ll call if anything else comes up.” I slanted a look over to Eilahn. “Or Eilahn will. She doesn’t listen to me when I’m acting all crazy.” The syraza returned the look with a smugly pleased one of her own.

Ryan snorted. “You mean most of the time then.”

Laughing, I snatched up the sofa cushion and smacked him with it. “You’d better get back to work, fed boy.”

“There are better ways to get attention you know,” he said with a grin, then wisely fled the house before I could hurl the pillow at him.

I took some time to take care of a few mundane household tasks, both to settle myself and to see if any weird feelings or sensations cropped up. All seemed fairly normal, and since I didn’t feel a sudden burning need to betray anyone who depended on me, I went out to look for Zack.

I found him busily reworking wards by the back fence beyond the pond. Since I had three hot topics to pursue with him—the attempted raid, Farouche’s assault on me, and Tessa’s weird behavior—I decided to get the least disturbing out of the way first.

“Hey,” I said as I sauntered up, “you find out anything more about how they tried to get in?”

Zack glanced back at me. “Not a lot. There were five of them, judging by the tracks outside the fence.” His mouth tightened. “They managed to get within about ten feet which means they were determined enough to work through the aversions.”

“It sucks ass to be under attack at my own house,” I said with a scowl. I moved up to the fence and peered at the intricate ward. “Farouche isn’t playing around. And meanwhile, Katashi has Idris who the hell knows where.”

Zack continued to trace arcane sigils, fluidly weaving them into protective wards. “I have a bad feeling it’ll get worse before everything settles down . . . oh, in a few hundred years or so.”

I groaned. “I’m going to pretend you’re kidding even if you aren’t.” The demonic lords and the demahnk were several thousand years old, which meant it was possible Zack was being completely serious. “It feels as if we’ve done nothing but chase leads and put out fires since I got back,” I said. “I haven’t had the chance to thank you for the fence and gate, and all the improvements in the house.” I smiled wryly. “I admit, I had a moment where it bugged me, but I got over it. Anyway, I really appreciate it, and I know all this must have cost you a fortune.”

Zack laughed and began another ward. “Yes, it did, but you don’t need to worry about that. I have my ways. Not unlimited ways, but we’re good for now.”

Too weird. A demon masquerading as a human with a trust fund. “The fence is awesome,” I said, “but I wish we’d been able to get a look at the intruders. What do you think about a camera surveillance system for the perimeter?”

“I think it’s needed.” He smiled. “And no, I don’t mind footing the bill. I can handle it.”

“Farouche is a confident, aggressive son of a bitch. I wouldn’t put it past him to try again.” A touch of fear whispered through me as I spoke of him. I breathed through it and used it as a segue to the second hot topic. “He didn’t even touch me. How the hell could he affect me so heavily?”

Zack’s hand stilled, sigil half traced. He looked back over his shoulder at me, shook his head slowly, lips pressed together. “Think of a qaztahl’s aura, but specialized. With Farouche, if you can feel it, he can affect you. It’s disturbing.” He went quiet, but it was one of those pauses where I could tell he had more to say. “Kara, I’d like to encourage Jill to move in for a while. I have her house warded, but right now we all need to be together.”

“I’m cool with that,” I replied, “especially now that we know Farouche is an exceptionally dangerous asshole.” Plus, Jill would have more time with Zack if she moved here, which might ease some of the tension between them. “But I have two questions for you. First, she’s a pretty independent chick. You think she’d agree to it?”

“Nope. I’ve tried. For months,” he said with undisguised frustration. “That’s why I’m enlisting you.”

“Gee, thanks.” Changing Jill’s mind wouldn’t be a walk in the park. “Let’s say, by some miracle, she does agree. My second question is where do you intend to
put
her?”

“For now I figured an RV—one of the really nice big ones—near the tree line on the east side of the house would work,” he said as he finished another sigil. “She’d have some privacy, I’d ward the hell out of it, and, because it would be within the fence and these perimeter wards, it would be as safe as your house.”

“The RV plan might work, but
privacy
?” I raised an eyebrow. “Puhleeease. It’s still me, you, Ryan, and Eilahn next door. Plus Thatcher and Paul when they get back, for who knows how long. And Mzatal when he’s here. Can’t forget the demonic lord.” I leveled a smirk at him. “If I were you, I wouldn’t try to sell her on the privacy part.”

He smirked right back at me. “Good. At least you know what
not
to use in your persuasive approach with her. I’m telling you. She won’t hear it from me.”

“Okay okay okay.” I lifted my hands in surrender. “Since I think it’s for a good cause, I’ll try to convince her.” I shook my head. “Not sure she’ll listen to me any more than to you though.”

Zack exhaled. “You’d be surprised. Anyway, thanks.”

“No problem.” Now for the last of the hot topics. “I have a new issue that’s bothering me, and I hope you can help me get some perspective.”

“Sure. What’s up?”

“It’s Tessa. I think she’s been manipulated.”

Zack stopped tracing a sigil, dispersed it with a sweep of his hand and turned to face me. “Why do you think that?”

“Because we talked, and every time it came around to one particular subject it was like it hit reset on a game, and she backtracked a minute.” Frustration and helpless anger rose again. “Also, her memory of another event seems programmed. It’s fucked up.”

“That does sound like manipulation,” he said, face serious but revealing nothing of his thoughts. “What was the topic?”

“Weirdly enough, the reset was when I asked her if she’d ever been to the demon realm.” I folded my arms, watched him carefully for any reaction. “Which begs the question, why the hell would my aunt be manipulated about that if she hadn’t been there?”

Zack cleared his throat. “Do you have any working theories?”

“One is that she was in the demon realm at the end of her time with Katashi and, for whatever reason, was then manipulated to forget all about it,” I said. “But I’d really like another theory.” My outrage at the violation of Tessa flared again. “I’ll take anything that isn’t ‘someone fucked with my aunt’s head.’”

“Your current theory is very sound.” He said it with a disturbing contemplative calm.

Fucking shit. My blood pounded in my ears. “Has Tessa ever been in the demon realm?”

Zack shifted from one foot to the other and didn’t answer. Anger seethed like a ball of fire in my chest, and I took a step toward him. “You
know
. Fucking tell me, Zack.
Now
. Has Tessa been in the demon realm?”

He gave a barely perceptible nod.

“With which lord?” I demanded. “Whose realm?” A horrible dread suddenly coiled through me.
What if he says Mzatal?
Katashi had been his sworn summoner, which meant it was more than possible.
No, Mzatal wouldn’t hide that from me,
I thought, casting the worry aside
.
I knew that much.

Zack stood in infuriating silence, his eyes on mine as I moved to the next worst possibility. “Rhyzkahl?”

Another micro nod.

Rage clogged my throat for several seconds. “You’ve known this all along and you didn’t
tell
me?” I shouted when I could finally speak. “What the fuck? You’re supposed to be my friend.” It hit me then, and I stared at him in sick horror. “You’re
his
goddamn ptarl. Does ptarl trump friend? Or were you ever my friend at all?” I’d had a dozen lifetime’s worth of betrayal from Rhyzkahl, but the very thought of the same from Zack was a knife in my gut. Like lord, like ptarl? “I guess that means you didn’t tell me before so you could protect his sorry ass and won’t fucking tell me now either!”

He drew a breath. “It’s true. I can’t tell you what happened.”

“This is my aunt,” I snarled. “You know what happened to her, but you won’t tell me because you’re still loyal to
him
.”

“Kara.” His eyes sought mine, but I was too distraught to read the emotion that burned within them. “I am here,” he said. “Not there.”

“It doesn’t help that you’re
here,
in my goddamn house, if you’re still loyal to that
chekkunden
.” I bared my teeth. “Can I trust you? Or do you report everything you see and hear back to him? Will I wake one morning with a knife at my throat and enemies in the house? Is that why you refuse to free Szerain? Do you remain a good little jailer for your fucked up master?”

An aggrieved expression touched Zack’s face. “I loosen Szerain’s confinement as I can, offer him relief.” He shook his head. “And I do not contact Rhyzkahl,” he added.

“Whew! I feel better now,” I said, with heavy sarcasm. “But you’re not answering my goddamn question!” Yelling felt pretty damn good at the moment. “Where are your loyalties? To him? Or to us?”

His jaw tightened. “It is not as simple as that, not so black and white.”

“Then explain,” I said and threw my arms out wide. “I’m all ears! You know what he did to me. How can you have
any
loyalty to him and still pretend to be on my side?”

“Kara, there are ancient ties, ancient agreements, ancient oaths.” His hand trembled, and he tightened it into a fist. “It does not mean that I act against you.”

“Ancient ties!” I spat the words back at him. “Rhyzkahl tortured me! Carved me up! You
know
what he’d have done to me if it hadn’t been for Mzatal and Idris.” A sense of utter betrayal swept over me, and I clung to the anger like a lifeline. “If you still have any loyalty to him, if you can’t tell me what I need to know, then you
are
acting against me.”

Zack shifted his weight again. “No,” he said, voice weirdly hollow. “I’m not acting against you. I am . . . not.”

“Then tell me about my aunt and Rhyzkahl.”

He remained silent for several heartbeats, tension holding his body rigid. “I
cannot
.”

“You are completely full of shit,” I sneered. “You stand back and convince yourself you’re not doing any harm, that you’re not a threat to us. You have all these ‘ancient ties’ to excuse your behavior.” I firmed my mouth. “How about I clear some shit up for you right now. As long as you keep vital information back, you’re not on our side, and I can’t fucking trust you.” A dim part of me knew I was overreacting, pulled at me to stop and breathe, but I couldn’t stem the raging emotions. Instead I turned and fled down the trail and back to the house. I stormed through the kitchen, retreated to my room and slammed the door hard enough to rattle the windows.

Hands clenched in my lap, I sat on the edge of the bed and willed myself not to cry despite the near overwhelming need to do exactly that.

A moment later, Zack spoke softly from the other side of the door. “Kara.”

“What.”

“I’m sorry.”

No way could I say “It’s all right” or “I forgive you” or anything like that, because it wasn’t and I didn’t. But I didn’t want to twist the knife further either. Zack had been oathbound long before he met me. Desperate worry about Tessa wound through my gut, along with the beginnings of a horrible suspicion about who Idris’s daddy might be, yet the idea that I might lose the Zack I thought I knew added a nauseating veneer. “Look, I can’t talk about this anymore,” I said in a shaking voice. “I need to be alone.”

Silence, then, “Would it be easier for you if I stay away from here?”

I didn’t know what I wanted except for the sick ache to disappear. “No, you don’t have to leave.” Why did this shit have to hurt so much?

After a moment I heard a soft noise as though he’d lifted his hand from the door. “All right,” he finally said. “I’m heading back to the office.” When he spoke after another moment of silence, his voice held no luster. “Kara, I’m really sorry you’re hurting.”

I didn’t answer, couldn’t answer as I fought to hold back tears. When I heard the front door close I finally buried my face in my pillow and gave in.