From The Shadows (From The Shadows #1) (13 page)

After talking to Sasha I walked into the bedroom to find Nathan packing for his overnight stay. “Sasha will come over around 4 pm this afternoon.. So I won’t need Shane around. And we talked about maybe going out shopping tomorrow”.

He turned to look at me with a proud smile on his face and something else in his eyes. Was that relief? It could be; considering what he answered. “I am glad to hear that babe, and I think you might have more fun with a girlfriend than hanging with my mate”.

I had to agree with that, but only partly because I had never felt out of place hanging with his friends, it might’ve been because of Nathan though. He had always tried to make me feel included. This hanging out with a girl, and doing girly stuff, was new for me and I was both excited and a bit nervous about how it was going to go. Was she going to find me weird when she got to know me better? Would we be able to have conversations that flowed? And would she find me boring? Yea, she might think all those things, but she might also actually become a real friend, and now that Nathan had become more than my friend, I needed that.

“Okay, I am done!” Nathan declared and for a split second he had me completely confused about what he was done with because I had been lost in thought.

“Babe, you with me?” he asked me and I shook my head to clear it and then told him yes.

“How long do we have before you are going to leave?”

“Hmm..” He picked up his phone and pressed a button to check the time before putting it back down at the dresser. “Around 1,5 hour” He told me. “So I have time for this..” He then said, walking over to me and took me into his arms before claiming my lips. Mmhmm.. would I ever get enough of him? I think not!

He ran his hands down to my ass, pressing me further into his warm masculine body, and then lowered his hands a bit more so he could lift me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he began taking a few steps until my back hit the wall, all while keeping his claim on my lips. He moved his right hand to my cheek and as he broke the kiss he looked into my eyes. “I miss you already”. He told me before moving his lips to my jaw line. “How am I going to fall asleep tonight without this sexy, beautiful body snuggled into me?”

Oh wow, how do you answer a question like that? He made me speechless, and he made me melt every time he said stuff like that to me. I did find my voice though. “I know I will have a hard time sleeping without you too!” I told him and I knew it was true, because I had gotten so used to falling asleep with my head resting on his chest, over the last couple of weeks. He made me feel safe.

With that he took my lips over again and got me riled up so much that I had no choice but moan and involuntarily start rubbing myself against him. His cock had become hard, fast, as it always did when we got lost in each other, and it also felt like we had too much clothes in the way. He had me craving him to enter me in no time, so I reached down between us to get to his zipper down to free his erection. We were definitely going to take advantage of the last time we had before Nathan had to go to the airport. And it was clear that we both agreed how we were going to do that, because as I reached into his jeans to grab his cock he moved his right hand back to under my butt and began pushing my panties aside and found my clit. He began rubbing me with his thumb as he slid his middle finger into my heat; drawing more moans from my lips. I was building after only a few strokes and I could hear from his moans that he wouldn’t last much longer, with me working him over, either. Just when I exploded around his fingers he pulled them out and slammed his cock into me, setting my orgasm on a rollercoaster ride that didn´t stop before a new one hit me even harder. Soon I was taking him with me on my ride of bliss. He pumped into me a few times more until he had emptied himself into my womb completely, and then he backed up to the bed falling back on it, never letting go of me.

We lay like that for a while just enjoying the afterglow of our lovemaking , if that is what you could call our animalistic joining, fueled by the longing we already felt for each other just from knowing we would be apart for one night.

“I love you”. I whispered into Nathan’s neck as I lay there breathing him in and wishing we didn´t need to get up any time soon.

“I love you more, beautiful”. He whispered back and kissed my temple, making me glow even more. Who wouldn’t love to hear that?

Eventually we had to get up and though Nathan had planned to shower before his flight he decided against it, telling me he wanted to smell me on his skin for a bit longer. How I was ever going to gather my lovesick mind after all those sweet words, I had no clue.

However, time came and Nathan had to get to the airport making sure he got there in time. We said our goodbyes, our ´talk to you soon´ and kissing each other’s lips sore, and then he was gone. And yes, I sounded like that was the end of us, which it of course wasn’t, but I already knew being apart sucked and it always would. So I did the only thing I knew would help me into a better mood, until Sasha came, and that was to put on some great music.

I went to Nathan’s record collection and found an old album with Nightwish, from the time when Nightwish was still Nightwish; back when Tarja Turunen was still the lead vocalist. Of course that was just my opinion, but really..! Had they thought switching their vocalist, and then on top of that switching her with a vocalist who did not even come from the same genre, would help them? If they did, then I sure as hell didn´t understand how they were thinking, and I guess I was not meant to either. However the good thing about records was that you could still put them on long after a band had changed or were no more. And the music would wake up musical memories that made you happy; like this record reminded me of a concert Nathan and I had seen. Mike had been there too, but that part I was able to push aside because he had been a pain, as usually, until Nathan and I had ditched him at the back to get to the front of the stage where Nathan had lifted me up on his shoulders allowing me to see everything happening on the stage. We sang out our lungs that night, and the band had been stuck in my heart ever since.

While reminiscing, I sang along and thought about how cool it would be if I could sing some of these songs when I began taking lessons. It meant I would have to take classical lessons, which didn´t really bother me, because I just wanted to sing out my heart. I wanted to sing ´Nemo´ and ´If I had an Angel´, but really those were just a few of a list that was getting longer by the day. There was so much great music, so much great melodic Metal and I wanted to try singing it all.

Daydreaming about my biggest dream to date, I nearly didn’t hear when Sasha knocked on the door and when I did notice and got to the door I found out she had knocked a few times, and she told me she had been close to calling my phone instead. Thank god she said it with a smile, which allowed me to breathe a sigh of relief, the last thing I wanted was to offend her.

Chapter 15

After ordering pizza we settled in with duvets, pillows and a stack of movies, ready for an evening of girl time.

“So what do you want to watch?” Sasha asked me.

“Hmm.. you are the guest so aren’t you the one to tell me instead?”

“Nope, not today, I get the impression that you have been going through a lot of shit lately so this weekend is for you!”

That was defiantly a sweet sentiment and it made me see Sasha in a completely new light. She might not have only been a superficial party girl but also a caring person.

“Hmm.. well let’s see… I really suck at making a choice but what about a movie with some music?”

Sasha was completely on board with that one so we decided on Sweeney Todd, because we weren’t in the mood for anything lovey dovey. However the movie had barely started before we began talking over it and not at all paying attention to what happened on the screen.

Sasha, being more perceptive than I, had begun asking me questions about my relationship to Mike, and told me she had noticed me having blue wrists a few times, over the last half year we had been working together, and often the barely covered pain in my eyes. She knew in her gut that I was in an unhealthy relationship, but was unable to help me because I hadn’t giving her a chance to talk to me in any real way. That too was the reason why she had tried to invite me along to a lot of events, which I had always turned down.

Her telling me all this and her questions had me taken aback at first, but little by little I opened up. I didn´t tell her everything, because let’s face it trust did not come over night and certainly not mine. I was beginning to let it all go little by little though, because I didn’t feel as threatened by my past after I had moved in with Nathan. It felt like putting the past behind me made me realize that moving forward allowed me more freedom, and it mattered less that people knew of my painful past when I was happy now. Not that I would say I was completely happy now because I still had a long way to go, but I was definitely getting there.

“I see a change in you”. Sasha told me.

“What do you mean?” I then asked.

“Well for one; I don’t see the pain in your eyes as often anymore, and you seem like you are getting more confidence, not to speak of the gigantic smile you get every time Nathan comes to pick you up”. The last part made her giggle. “Girl, you are definitely in love now and it is so fucking easy to see!”

That made me blush. Or at least I think it did because my cheeks began feeling warm and my eyes went to my hands that again were fidgeting. And this only made Sasha giggle even more. Apparently I was not only an open book to Nathan but pretty much to the rest of the world too. And here I had been convinced that I had all my walls up and held together tight that no one could see what was going on in my life; unless I told them, which until now, I had chosen not to.

“Relax Nikki, just because people can see you for who you really are doesn´t mean you´re weak. Look at how much you went through and still going through, and you are still around and you are trying to get up.”

What did I say to that? Was I even meant to answer her or was she just trying to open up my eyes?

After an awkward silence, of a few minutes, Sasha told me. “You should be proud of yourself”. And that made me smile and I thanked her.

She then leaned in to hug me and to my surprise I allowed her to do so, but my hugging her back was much more restrained than the one she gave me. It did make me feel like, maybe, I was getting a real friend though and that idea made me warm inside.

After that very serious talk, we turned on to more safe topics and in no time we had begun talking about guys. And when my phone began ringing in the middle of the second movie, I was giggling so badly.

“Hey babe” I greeted Nathan.

“Hey beautiful, you sound like you are having a good time?”

“Yea sorry..” I said, once again blushing because though I was having so much fun I didn´t want Nathan to have to hear about our naughty talk about actors that made us drool. To be honest even if one of them stood before me I would always pick Nathan over them; both because he was just as hot looking and also because he owned my heart.

“Babe, don’t be sorry, I am very relieved to hear that you are having a good time. I do however miss you, so bad already” He admitted.

“I miss you too Nate”. That made Sasha come with an “Aww” sound in the background.  

“It sounds like I better get off the line again so you girls can get back to your fun”.

“You don’t have to” I told him in a hurry, because I hadn´t gotten enough of his voice, even though having fun with Sasha was preoccupying my mind.

Sasha then began making kissy faces to me and set me off on a giggle fit again, which though Nathan said it was nice to hear me having fun, must have been a bit irritating when you were not part of the fun.

He did however not let that on when he answered me. “Yea I do baby, because I am having a dinner meeting in five. I just wanted to check in with you to make sure you were okay. And to tell you I love you and will call when I get back to the hotel to tell you goodnight”.

“Okay, I love you too, bye”.

“Bye babe”.

Then our talk was over and Sasha sat back with a huge grin on her face. “God, you guys are cute!”

The rest of the evening was spent with more movies and more girl talk and at some point we both fell asleep to a movie, and when I woke up to go to bed it was 3am in the morning.

I hadn´t wanted to wake Sasha so I just tiptoed into Nathan’s bedroom and got ready for bed. When I checked my phone I could see I had missed a call from him about 2 hours ago and shortly thereafter he had sent me a message too.

Hey Bab
e


I guess you fell asleep already so I hope you are dreaming about me.

Throw me a message whenever you see this and then I will call back in the morning.

Love you

<3

I sent him a message back that I had indeed fallen asleep on the couch and was just about to jump into bed now but that I wished he was here. And then I went back to sleep, missing him like hell but smiling because he loved me and was thinking of me.

As I walked into the living room the next morning Sasha sat up looking like she just opened her eyes.