Frayed (11 page)

Once I was safely on the sand, I was glad to find that there
was no one around. The small strip of sand was nestled in between two huge boulders. I tried to gather as much strength and rationale before I decided I was ready to hear his voice again. My fingers trembled when I touched the screen to send the call. My heart shot up manically once I heard the first ring echo in my delicate ear.

“
Trista,” Harry breathlessly said after the second ring.

Oh, God. I could feel my barriers slowly sliding off, easing at the mere sound of his voice
. Fuck, I cursed repeatedly. Think of Emma and how she reacted when she found out about Carter’s betrayal. She broke down, but persevered. Think of what Lindsey would’ve done, if a guy messed with her. She would have made them pay.

Harry had to know the kind of pain and hurt he inflicted on me. Loving him only gave him the power to hurt me this badly. He had to know that I could survive without him in my life. He had to realize that.

“I just read your email.” I sounded terse and brisk
.
,
T
t
he total opposite of the raging chaos that was happening inside of me.

“I’m sorry. I felt like a total dick—” he
was going to try to justify his cruel actions, but I wouldn’t let him.

I gave a harsh laugh at his attempt. “Yeah, you were a total dick. You were shitty, cruel, heartless, unfeeling
; a brutal son of a bitch, Harry. You let me face it, and go through it, all on my own. No support or remorse came from you. That shitty love you kept throwing in my face was an absolute lie. And to answer your question,
yes
, I will be moving on. I don’t care how I will achieve it, but rest assured, I will get over you, Harry. Bastards like you don’t deserve to be loved.”

“I know you’re angry, but you don’t mean that. You love me,
Trista, and I love and miss you like crazy.” He sounded like he meant it, but what did I really know? It ticked me off that his words stole my breath away.

A big part of me
wanted to go back and be with him, but then I flashed to the moment that despair had overcome me the other night. I couldn’t keep hurting myself. I had to move on. It was pathetic that I kept making excuses not to, but I had none left. If I didn’t do it now, I might never get a chance again. “We’re really finished, Harry. I’m dead serious about this. I will make it a mission if I have to, so please, stop reaching out to me. Goodbye.” I hung up without even caring if he wanted to talk my ear off about
his
reasons.

It was for the best. Nothing good could ever come out it. With shaky breath and legs, I decided that it was best to sit it out on the sand for
a while and wait for my turbulent emotions to calm down, before going back up to the villa.

Huh, he’s sorry.
How trite and obnoxious could he be?

“Hey, you okay?”

I spun sideways and found a serious looking Taylor standing on the foot of the steps. My fingernails dug into the insides of my palm when I clenched my hand. Heck, I forgot about him and his watchful eye. “Were you eavesdropping?”

Taylor’s footsteps headed towards me. I held my breath when I heard him sit behind me. “Come here, let me hold you.” His toned, muscular arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me against him. I curled up like an injured animal. My body nestled in between his legs, my head on his chest. His large hand rubbed a small
place on my back, soothing me. “Let it out. You’ve held it in for far too long. I’m here just to listen and comfort you, nothing more.”

Dang it, why did he have to say the right things? I didn’t want to break
down and cry my guts out, but I ended up doing it anyway. I cried like the broken woman that I was inside. Cried for the mistakes I could have avoided, for the life I could’ve had if I hadn’t become a mistress.
But m
M
ost of all, my heart cried out to my innocent, unborn child—the collateral damage for our forbidden tryst.

“I have to forget him. It’s time,” I murmured,
as much to myself as to Taylor. I hoped that the more I spoke and thought it, I would eventually believe it.

I was not aware how long I cried my heart out
, but the moment my loud cries turned into soft sobs, I took notice. All of my hair-raising senses were on high alert—conscious, enrapt and aware—of the hard perfection that held me. It left me flustered and dismayed. Why? Possibly due to the fact that I found myself
liking
being held in his arms, or the way he smelled—sexy with a cool, crisp hint of potent masculinity—that toyed badly with my amplified senses.

Taylor would’ve been the perfect
, sexual, rebound man. If he weren’t so connected to Bass and Emma, I wouldn’t even hesitate to lose myself in him. Alas, life wanted to play more ghastly jokes on me, testing my will and limits of temptation.

Like Harry, it all started with curiosity
, turned into temptation, which brought me to eternal damnation.

Yeah, I wasn’t ready for another head-to-head match with my mind and body. So, I simply broke myself
out of his hold, stood up and silently walked away without saying a damn word.

***

The four “let’s play under the sun” girls joined Taylor down on the shore for swimming and beach volleyball. I don’t know why, but each time one of them tried to engage me in conversation, I turned into a bitter bitch. I noticed them starting to avoid me as much as I was them; I guess the feelings were mutual.

It was just Lindsey and I on the patio. We were on our backs, bathing suits and sunglasses in place, working on our tans, when my phone beeped with a text message.

Amber: I wished I
was there with you guys. The only thing that keeps me from walking out of this place is the thought of seeing you all in a month. Since I am miserable in Arizona, please make sure you have twice as much fun. You get my fun card. Double the pleasure, double the fun! Tell both girls I said hi and miss them. I have so much to make up with you all. I love you, Trista Stevens. Thanks for not giving up on me.

“Is that Horrid Harry? You look sad.” Lindsey lifted her sunglasses, her eyes waiting for me to confirm her suspicions.

Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes underneath the sunglasses. I knew she didn’t really like Harry, well no one did
, but I was done talking about him. I didn’t want to say or hear his name anymore. I meant it when I told him I was going to do everything in my power to banish him from my thoughts. “No. I told you, Harry wouldn’t be contacting me anymore. It’s actually Amber. She’s saying that she misses you guys and can’t wait to join us back in SB,” I replied, distracted with my quick reply to Amber’s message.

“Tell her to focus on getting better and stop flirting with the doctors and the entire male staff.” Lindsey muttered as she went back to her old position, with a slight frown on her pretty face.

Amber was known for her excessive, sexual appetite. She’s quite open about it to us and doesn’t hold back the details.   Knowing how she was, I bet she had the male staff under her thumb.

Me: Hey, love. Wish you were here, too. We’re on the island of Ios with Taylor Montgomery (Bass’s BFF). I’m looking forward to seeing you. BTW, Lindsey said to focus on getting better and not flirting with the male doctors. I know it’s fun and all, but we’re serious. Get better this time. We miss you.

P.S. I’m here for you, always. Love you,
Doll.

After sending the message, I laid back and worked on my tan. I looked calm, but it was only a facade. Inside, my thoughts gravitated again to Harry, Taylor and now, Amber. The first two, I could do without. The last one, I couldn’t. I gave a long silent prayer that Amber was getting the treatment that she obviously needed. I also hoped that she took it seriously.

Chapter 10

Trista

After a full hour of serene silence, the Fantastic Four along with Taylor joined us around the pool. I held my eyes shut, not caring about the intruders.

“Hey, Lindsey! We’re going back to shower and change. We’ll meet up at the same bar, let
’s say around nine-thirty, ten?” One of the FF’s said.

“You bet! See you guys later,” I heard Lindsey
say. After a minute, she spoke again, to Taylor. “You look pink, Tay Tay. Too much hanky-panky under the sun? How drunk did those girls get you, hmm?”

Hanky-panky? Was Taylor messing around with them?
All FOUR of them? Uh, another case of ménage-a-fucktard.
Men. When it comes to women, no matter the quality, quantity overrules simple, common sense.

The playboy of the day gave a riotous laugh, like it was the funniest thing
he’d heard all day. “Fine, I’m wasted. No harm no foul.” He admitted, leaving out the important detail of whether he had indeed had his fair share of hanky-panky.

“I just bet. Well, good for you. Hey, you’re on a holiday. It’s the best time of the year to get your freak on.” Lindsey and Taylor both laughed at that.

What was Lindsey doing cheering him on to whore it out tonight? Didn’t she insinuate that something was going on between Taylor and I? Of course it
wasn’t true, but it kind of stung that
if it happened to be true
, she would suggest that to him.

“I’m getting hungry. Can we just order in tonight? I want to relax before we hit the party rock tonight.” Lindsey was gathering her things as she
spoke. She grabbed her iPod, a paperback, cellphone and her see-through beach dress, all stacked up together.

“Sure,” I murmured. Taylor mirrored my answer.

“Awesome sauce! Don’t forget to wear something killer tonight, Trista Stevens. It’s on tonight, baby! We’ll find you a sinful guy to hump and bump on, clothing optional, of course!”

I
love my friend. She likes to mess with my head too much, though. “Now, that’s my kind of plan.” Let operation
Forget The Bastard
be put into motion.

My inner cheerleader died when I heard Taylor snort at my response. “You
have something to say, pretty boy? Spit it out, I want to hear it.” I raised my brow at him, my voice scathing. My hateful glare didn’t faze him. In fact, he rewarded me with one of his own.

Lindsey glanced at
me, I saw her frowning in my peripheral vision. I’m sure my reaction to Taylor was already noted in that brilliant head of hers. I wasn’t going to explain anything, or back down from the glare war we were having.

Taylor simply got on my nerves. Since that night in Aspasia, we both had the whole I-think-
I-might/I- think-I-won’t down to a T. Add in my emotional drama and my intense awareness of him, and it was a volcano, packed with crazy, ready to erupt. We were a disaster waiting to happen.

Like a ticking time bomb, our time was numbered until showdown. It
would be a hateful mouth-off, one I was prepared for. He did tell me to start fighting, did he not? Well, here I was, fighting.

Come what may.

“O…
kay
. I’m going to order some food.” Lindsey started to walk away, but paused and looked back at both of us. “You know,” she said pointing her hot pink-tipped finger at us, waving it back and forth, “whatever’s going on…
freaking get to it!
You guys need to fuck each other, already. The tension is just too damn much.” Lindsey shook her head prettily and went back inside the villa.

If my eyes had the power to sear people, Taylor would’ve been charred to perfection by now. The only tension I had at the moment was
keeping myself from strangling this stupid man. I would also love to successfully swipe off that stupid smirk that
just
became pasted on his face while I was at it. “What?” I snapped at the infuriating man. His sudden amusement grated me to death. It was like listening to nails scratching on a chalkboard.

“Want to pay heed to her insightful advice?” Taylor delivered with such infuriating confidence.