Forced Out (2 page)

His emotion had nothing to do with the stadium. Whether it held sixty thousand or six hundred. Whether this was game seven of the World Series or a meaningless minorleague scrap. Whether there was a giant screen past the fence in center showing multiangle, slow-motion replays--or a cow pasture, like there was tonight. His reaction had to do with the field itself.

With the perfect symmetry of the diamond inside the nuances of the outfield and foul territory. With the contrast of sculpted brown dirt against a canvas of lush, carefully manicured green grass. With how lonely the snow-white island of second base seemed. With the sharp right angle formed at home plate and how the lines creating the angle seemed to stretch past the fence and the cow pasture into eternity. How frighteningly close the pitcher's mound was to home plate, but how big the entire field seemed. How only nine men covered the vast expanse before him, but how a batter who failed to reach base six times out of ten was a lock for the Hall of Fame. How each baseball field was a work of art, unique and compelling in its own right. Which made the game so much more intriguing, so unlike all other geometrically constrained sports. And now that Jack had suddenly reconnected with the game, he was forced to admit how empty the past four years had been without it. Forced to admit
how much
he'd missed this game. Like you missed the love of your life.

Like he still missed the love of his life.

Even after all these years.

Jack glanced at the burning orange sun sinking toward the glittering aqua waters of the gulf beyond the grazing black-and-white cows. Nostalgia surging back at him from all directions as he inhaled the scents of freshly mown grass, cigar smoke, and those sizzling hot dogs all intertwining on the gentle sea breeze. It seemed like such a simple game--a man attempting to hit a pitched ball--yet ultimately it was so complicated. He'd been devoted to this game, given all he had to it. In return it had destroyed him. He shook his head grimly. But here he was, back for more. In the end unable to resist the allure. Sometimes being human was nothing but pure hell.

"Come on, Pop, let's find our seats."

Jack shrugged Bobby Griffin's hand from his shoulder like a horse shaking away a pesky fly. "I'm not your
pop
," he said with a growl as the young man lumbered past.

"Be nice to this one, Daddy," Cheryl urged as she came up beside him. "I really like him."

Jack eyed an usher. The thin, elderly man was leaning over, his age-spotted forearms resting on a yellow-painted railing. A railing separating seven rows of box seats from the rest of the stands--the haves from the have-nots. The usher was wearing a short-sleeve button-down white shirt, black polyester pants, and a red cap with a shiny black visor. He looked more like a bus driver than an usher.

"Look, it's just that--"

"What's Bobby done so wrong?"

He was born a male and he's dating you. Isn't it obvious? "First of all, he keeps you out

'til two in the morning," Jack began, proud of himself for showing such restraint.

"Which is way past your bedtime."

Cheryl smiled like it hurt. "I'm thirty-three, Daddy. Don't you hear how silly that sounds?"

"
Second of all,
he's only twenty-five. He isn't serious about your relationship." Jack hesitated. Talking about this with a woman wasn't easy for a man born into a staunchly conservative household on V-J Day--even when the woman was his daughter. Maybe because the woman was his daughter. "He's using you for sex." At least he'd made progress. Ten years ago he wouldn't have been able to say that. Not nearly. Cheryl's expression tempered into one of sincere amusement, and she ran her fingers playfully through her father's full head of salt-and-pepper hair, then lightly down his grizzled cheek. "Maybe it's the other way around, Daddy. Maybe
I'm
using
him
for sex." Jack groaned, grabbed his chest, and staggered forward a few steps. "You sure know how to hurt an old man, don't you?"

"You're not old, Daddy. You're middle-aged."

"People don't live to a hundred and twenty-six, Princess."

"Can I help you?" the usher asked in a voice that sounded like it needed oil. He rose slowly off the railing like his joints could use grease, too.

"We're fine," Jack replied, clasping Cheryl's elbow and guiding her toward Bobby, who was waving at them from up in the stands. "But thanks."

"You should think about doing that," Cheryl suggested, gesturing over her shoulder.

"Doing what?"

"Being an usher."

"Yeah, right."

"No, really. You'd be out here at the ballpark all the time. For free, too. It'd be perfect. You'd love it."

Jack rolled his eyes as they neared their seats--eight rows up from the railing on a direct line behind the third-base dugout. Cheryl meant well--she
always
meant well; she just didn't understand. Being an usher would be even worse than what he was doing now, which was bagging groceries at a local Publix store for ten dollars an hour. Not very long ago he'd been a top man in the New York Yankees' scouting organization. An important cog in the greatest sports franchise in the world--at least, in his opinion it was the greatest. He couldn't bear the thought of his baseball career ending as an usher for the Single-A Sarasota Tarpons.

"Maybe I will, Princess," he said softly, "maybe I will." Bobby Griffin sat at the end of the row--he'd bought tickets for the three seats closest to the aisle. He stood up and moved out of the way as Jack and Cheryl approached.

"What are you doing?" Jack wanted to know.

"Letting you in." Bobby motioned for them to go ahead. "Look, I've got to sit at the end of the row, Pop," he pleaded when Jack didn't move. "I'm six four. My legs don't fit in the--"

"Well, I'm sixty-three, and I've got arthritis in both knees." Cheryl grabbed Bobby's hand and pulled him toward the second seat. "Come on, honey."

"But baby, I paid for the tickets. I ought to at least get to--"

"Come
on
."

"Jesus," Bobby grumbled.

Jack sat down slowly, then stretched his legs into the aisle. No way Bobby was going to start an argument now. That might jeopardize his plans for later.

He shook his head, trying to clear away the bad thoughts. It bothered him to think about boys taking advantage of his little girl; it always had. Ever since she'd started dating. Ever since the first boy had shown up at the house with that hungry look in his eyes. Cheryl was one of the nicest, most sincere people on earth, and she always felt so much pressure to give the ones she liked what they wanted. She was pretty--slim with long blond hair--but she didn't pay much attention to her looks. Never had, really. Most of the time she kept her hair up in an unruly bun, didn't wear much makeup, and dressed plainly. But he didn't know how to tell her she ought to jazz it up. Truth was, he didn't want her to jazz it up. Then there'd just be more boys.

"How many people do you think this place holds, Daddy?" Cheryl asked when they were settled in.

Nostalgia nudged at Jack again. It was the same question she always asked the first time they went to a ballpark together. She'd done it since she was a little girl, since he'd first started taking her to games. The times her brother couldn't go. She had always liked getting a feel for her surroundings. "The capacity is--"

"Eight thousand," Bobby cut in confidently.

"Actually, it's sixty-two hundred." Jack moved his legs out of the aisle as a tall couple began climbing the steps. Hopefully they weren't going to plunk themselves down in the open seats in front of him. At this point he had a perfect, unobstructed view of the field, and he didn't want to have to move from side to side to see the action between their heads. "The number was posted on a fire warning downstairs," he explained, relieved when the couple moved past. "From the looks of things I'd say it's about half full." The crowd mustered a weak cheer when the Tarpons broke from the dugout a few moments later.

As the players jogged toward their positions, Jack sat up and leaned forward, noticing one of them instantly. Before the kid even reached the third-base line on his way out to center field. He had that aura about him all the great ones had. An unmistakable charisma that caught Jack's trained eye right away. A confident, athletic stride that ate up ground effortlessly. A smoothness in everything he did--from handling the right fielder's bad warm-up toss on a short hop to adjusting his red cap with the smiling tarpon on the front after each throw back. An innate awareness of where he was in relation to everything else on the field. The impression he had a couple of gears in reserve he could call on if he needed to, and then you'd
really
see something special. And he had a gun for an arm, an absolute rifle. Of course, Jack had an advantage as far as recognizing the kid's ability. He'd spent thirty-four years scouting talent for the Yankees. Then the organization had turned its back on him.

"Yo, beer man!" Bobby shouted to a scraggly-looking guy carrying a tray of cold ones.

"Over here!"

Jack covered his ears with his hands. "Jesus, you sure got a healthy set of pipes on you, don't you, son?" Bobby Griffin was big, blond, and good-looking. A sales rep for a Los Angeles-based sporting goods company, he covered the South Florida market. According to Cheryl, Bobby was doing pretty well for himself--which only made Jack feel worse. Successful, handsome twenty-five-year-old men didn't settle down with thirty-three-year-old women. They used them. "I think the
right fielder
heard you, for Christ's sake."

"Cheryl warned me about you," Bobby shot back cheerfully, handing the beer man a twenty and signaling that he wanted three. "Said you were kinda grumpy. But that's all right, I can deal."

Jack intercepted the first cup, brought it to his lips, and took a long guzzle. It was a hot May evening in Sarasota--still eighty-four degrees at seven-thirty--and the cold beer tasted damn good.

He glanced back out to center as darkness closed in around the small stadium. Strange, he thought. You didn't see many baseball players with facial hair, especially in the minors and especially the really good ones. But the kid had a full beard and a mustache along with a mop of dark hair tumbling down from beneath his red cap. When the public-address announcer asked the crowd to rise for the national anthem, Jack did so right away. And he sang along loudly with the music as he always did, trying to make people around him feel comfortable about singing, too, though they rarely did. He'd served in the army before joining the Yankees, and he had a deep sense of loyalty to the country. His only regret with his military service was that he'd never experienced combat. Never had a chance to get to Vietnam to find out how he'd react to real bombs and bullets. He thought he knew, but you could never be sure until the chaos actually erupted around you.

"I hate the Tarpon uniforms," Bobby complained, squeezing back into his seat when the anthem was over. "There's too much red. Their pants, even. It's ridiculous. And that stupid mascot. A
smiling
fish. The whole thing's too loud."

"I thought 'loud' was your middle name," Jack shot back. "I figured you'd love their uniforms."

It was the first time they'd spent more than a few minutes together, and Jack caught Bobby shaking his head, like the young man wasn't sure he could put up with this for nine innings after all. Well, good. Bobby seemed nice enough, but it was obvious he was going to break Cheryl's heart at some point. The sooner the better. It was going to be awful to see her hurt--again, Jack thought ruefully. To see the devastated expression, the tears streaming down her cheeks. Hear the soft sobs from her bedroom at night before she fell asleep, and again in the morning as soon as she woke up. It always made Jack feel terrible as he held her in his big arms and tried to comfort her. But the longer this thing with Bobby went on, the worse the pain would be. One of these times it was going to be too much, it was going to push her over the edge. It almost had with the last guy, and he'd been a loser compared to Bobby Griffin. When Bobby leaned forward to check something on the scoreboard beyond the fence in left, Jack caught a familiar warning look from Cheryl. Thin lips pressed tightly together, one eyebrow raised, head turned slightly to the side, eyes intense like the blue part of a flame. Okay, okay he thought. Maybe this one was different. Doubtful, but maybe. And to his credit, Bobby had paid for tonight. The first one of her boyfriends who'd ever sprung for anything.

Jack tapped Bobby's arm. "Thanks for the beer, son. Tastes good."

"Oh, sure."

"Ticket, too. I really appreciate it." It killed him to say so, but Cheryl was much more important than his stupid pride. "I don't make the money I used to." That one
really
hurt.

"Every little bit I save helps."

"I understand."

Jack raised his cup and nodded. "I'll get the next round."

"Tell you what," Bobby suggested. "Let's bet on pitches for beers."

"What do you mean?"

Bobby pointed toward the scoreboard. "They post the pitch speed up there a few seconds after each one. Either of us gets the number exactly right before they post it, the other guy buys the next round. How about that, Pop?"

Apparently Cheryl hadn't told Bobby what her daddy had done before being exiled to Florida. Jack had asked her not to mention it to the neighbors, but he figured she was telling the guys she dated. "Okay, sounds good." He'd nail a few pitch speeds, then buy the next couple of beers anyway. To show Bobby his crankiness had its limits.

"Play ball!"

A chill ran up Jack's spine as he watched the home-plate umpire point at the pitcher from over the catcher's back, and heard the man in blue yell those familiar words. And he actually smiled inside a baseball stadium for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. More out of relief than anything else. Relief that tonight wasn't turning out to be so gut-wrenching after all. Relief that the bitterness wasn't crushing the experience. He took another deep breath of those wonderful scents and glanced around, his grin growing wider. This tiny minor-league ballpark was so intimate you could feel the action. Not just see it, like you did in the Bronx, because most of the seats there were so far away from the players. You felt like part of what was happening here, not like just a witness.