Flirting With Magick (20 page)

“Not at all.” I had just drained my glass and rejected his offer of
another when the buzzing oven timer interrupted the rest of the
conversation. I was glad to keep our relationship to myself for a while.

After praising him on his cooking prowess, dinner conversation inevitably turned to the subject of past lovers.

“There was someone, not long before you arrived at Avalon.” He confessed. “But that’s over now... obviously. And you?”

“Nothing worth talking about,” I replied, eager to get both Scott and Josh out of my head and try to concentrate on the here and now with Sean, even though I wasn’t in the least bit curious about his last
girlfriend. The problem was that the more I tried, the harder it was.
During the formality of the candlelit dinner, the romantic mood musi
c, and Sean’s lovely and thoughtful attempts at being the perfect host, I found myself yearning for the easy beer and pizza nights in front of
the TV
—
the ones I had with Josh as well as those which came so easily
with Scott. Don’t get me wrong; I loved romance. Josh, especially, had
a
trick of surprising me on a Friday afternoon with a bunch of flowers
at the office, then whisking me off to a bed and breakfast in the mountains
or by the sea. Other times he would surprise me with a homemade,
gourmet meal when I arrived home from working late or from a shopping
trip with the girls. Even Scott going out for muffins for breakfast had a
tender mood to it. Tonight, as sweet as Sean’s efforts were, the roma
ntic atmosphere felt forced; he was trying too hard. I went over and over in my head what I found attractive about him.

1. He was very good-looking.

2. He made me laugh.

3. I was comfortable with him.

Everything seemed alright there. I wracked my brain trying to work
out why the hell I wasn’t chomping at the bit to rip his clothes off.
All I could come up with was that we were work colleagues
—probably
not the best place to be if we got serious and then broke up. Then again
, other people made it work.

Two more thoughts entered my head. I shoved them away shamef
ully but they wouldn’t leave.

1. He's not Josh.

2. He's not Scott.

Bloody hell, get a grip, I told myself. What the hell was I thinking
?
Josh was a non-committal so and so who thought I would pander to his
every need and take him back just because he wanted me to. I didn’t
think so. And Scott, as lovely as he had been, was certainly best out of
my life. I was getting too emotional, and he obviously wasn’t looking
for the same thing. It was, in fact, a good thing that Sean told me wh
at he had seen and I moved on from Scott before I really made an idiot out of myself.

I bit my lip, feeling guilty at my thoughts, and attempted to look
at Sean in a new light as he finished tidying up (a trait I must say was
not possessed by Josh), sat down next to me, and started nuzzling my
neck. The air got hot and heavy as his kisses became more determined
and his hands dared stroke higher up my thigh and further down m
y
cleavage. I cursed my boldness at wearing such a low-cut top and tempting
chance. This was too soon. I gently pushed him away, smiling coyly to
indicate that I wasn’t offended by his persistence.

“
Sorry,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I guess I was getting a bit carried away.”

“No, it’s fine.” I placed my hand on his thigh. “Just a bit too soo
n,
that’s all.” What was with the sudden change in moral standing? I had
kissed Sean a week ago and didn’t wish to go any further, yet (even if
out of character) I’d slept with Scott three times in the same period. I
needed to cut through the awkwardness. “How about we go for a walk
? It’s a beautiful night.”

He placed a lingering kiss on my lips in reply. “Good idea.”

***

“So you’re
sure
you wouldn’t bonk Ray?” Sean kept a straight face
as I giggled uncontrollably. “Come on, doesn't it turn you on the way
he lines up his stationery? What about when he tells one of his dumb jokes? I’ve seen all you girls checking him out.” We’d walked several
blocks, and the spring night air was cool and crisp. We were playing th
e ‘who in the office would you bonk’ game and so far he had admitted to Rachel; Carmel, a sexy forty-something of Spanish descent (with
the seductive accent to match) in marketing; and Pippa, as long as she
didn’t talk. Oh, and me of course.

I mischievously left him out of my responses, instead opting for
Owen, an older, very married gent in Sales who was sexy in a Sean
Connery kind of way, and Gabriel, one of the advertising team who
somehow seemed too cute to be straight—whatever that meant—but no one was able to confirm.

“
Surely you’d bonk Bronwyn?” I asked cheekily as we approached
a pub with the heavy thump of a live band playing inside. As we got closer, the song gradually became all too familiar. “Sounds like your
mates are playing here again tonight.” Sean remarked, not hearing my
joke. “Want to go in?”

Shit. As I hadn’t been to PeaSeas to watch
Reckless Choice
play, I
didn’t know where it was, and as I was making an emotion-saving
concerted effort to stay away from Scott, after they played at the pub
near Avalon, I no longer kept track of where they were playing. “Yeah...
alright.” It was now or never. I had to show myself, if anyone, that I could happily move on. PeaSeas was a newly built bar with modern
black and white fittings, very different to the other older, more tradition
al
pubs I'd seen the band play at. The crowd seemed more sophisticated
as
well, and I was thankful that I was in my sexy top and heels. As usual
,
the inside of the room was sweltering with wall to wall bodies. As Sean
went to the bar, I argued with myself as to whether I should stay lost
in the crowd, enjoy the night with Sean, and leave
—
knowing that Scott
would be none the wiser that I was ever there—or do the adult thing
by seeking out the band members and saying hello. I knew this was th
e right thing to do. Sometimes I didn’t like being an adult.

We watched the band from the back of the room, squashed together
near an open door, which let in a refreshing breeze against the hot,
sweaty crowd, Sean’s arm loosely wrapped around my waist while I
leaned forward just slightly to allow the air to flow between us and coo
l
my dampening back. It had been a while since I had seen the band play
,
and they had somehow evolved as their popularity grew. Hair was
longer, clothes were more stylish, and
—
what was that?
—
eyeliner? And
I thought Scott couldn’t get any sexier. I ignored Sean’s groin against
my back and watched Scott concentrate on his guitar playing, his expert
fingers flicking the strings with casual abandon. I closed my eyes and
realised I was wishing it was his body I was pressed against and that it was his hand resting lightly on my tummy, as it had done so many
times before. I shouldn’t have come. It was easier when I didn’t see
him-– easier to enjoy the company and attentions of other guys. But as
nice and sexy as he was, and regardless of the fun we had had together
,
it wasn’t him I was pressed against, and it
wasn't
his hand purposefully
and protectively wrapped around me. Surely this was better. Here I was
with a guy who genuinely seemed to want to be with me. Sean didn’t
see me as a casual bed partner, another notch to add to his bedpost.
With him, I really was the only one, not one in a long line of conv
enient and easy shags.

“Hey, Abby.” I opened my eyes, not realising that the live music had switched to the jukebox while I was lost in my thoughts. Nathan was carrying his bass drum out the door and smiling a cheery hello. He looked from me to Sean, to the arm around me, which even I was
surprised hadn't yet been removed. “Hey,” he said to Sean. “I’m Nathan
. You must be Josh.”

“Sean. I work with Abby.” Sean didn’t appear to flinch, although I gasped in horror. I hadn’t seen much of Kate since she now spent most
of her time with Nathan and hadn’t even had a chance to tell her abou
t
Sean, so it was understandable that they might have jumped to conclusions.

“Oh, shit, sorry,” Nathan said to me. “Kate told me your ex was back in town, and when you and Scotty – “

“No, it’s
okay. Is she here
?” I interrupted as the devil himself emerg
ed behind Nathan through the crowd.

"No,
she had to work
late last night, so was too tired to make it tonight."

I nodded and turned to the newcomer. “Hey, Scott. How are you?
” My voice was amazingly steady, despite the fact that my insides had
turned to mush at the sight of him. He had that smudged eyeliner thing
going on, which only accentuated the greenness of his eyes, and he was
wearing a white T-shirt which left nothing about his muscular form to
the imagination.

“
Hi, Abby, good to see you.” He studied me for a moment before
nodding politely at Sean, briefly taking in the arm which was had grown
even tighter around my waist when Scott materialised. My ann
oyance
at Sean changed swiftly to cold relief when Tanya broke through the crowd
and locked her arm possessively through Scott’s. I reacted by placing my
hand over Sean’s as he rubbed his thumb lightly over my stomach.

“Can I get you a drink, baby?” She gave us a dismissive glance and
batted her eyelids at Scott. She didn’t appear to recognise me.

“I think I’ve got one coming," he said, smiling at her, which I sadl
y
recognised as the first I had seen him flash all night. "I think you’ve me
t Abby and, I’m sorry I’ve forgotten your name.”

“Sean.”

“Sean, Abby’s boyfriend.” I opened my mouth to protest, but not
before he disentangled his arm from Tanya’s and draped it affectionately
around her shoulder. “This is Tanya.”

“
Lovely to meet you both,” she said with the same false sweetne
ss she had spoken to me in that night at The Village nightclub. I noticed
a faint flicker of recognition as we locked eyes, and she smiled smugly
at me. She was wearing a slinky, off the shoulder blouse, which did
nothing to hide the fact that her pert breasts were braless, and a pair of black, faux leather hot pants which made her legs seem to go on forever. I shrank further back into Sean’s arms.

“Are you guys okay for a drink?” Scott asked us.

“Actually, it’s getting late,” I replied before Sean could. I looked up at him with my best coquettish look. “We’d better get going. Shall we?” I kept my hand locked with his as I dragged him towards the exit. “Good to see you again,” I said pleasantly to Scott as we pushed
past, avoiding eye contact while deliberately ignoring Tanya and
inadvertently forgetting Nathan.

***

“
Abby, what was that all about?” Sean asked after we left the nois
e of the bar behind and trudged back to his flat.

“What do you mean?” I had just realised we were still holding hands.

I let go, and he stopped. “Abby, I’m not stupid. He was more than
just a friend, wasn’t he? I mean you practically broke my hand when
he put his arm around that girl. She's not the one I saw last time, by
the way.”

"Yeah, he's like that," I snapped. As I reached Sean’s building, I
shook my head and turned back to him. “I’m sorry, Sean.”

“It’s okay.” He hustled me through the door. “I just want you to be honest with me. And who’s Josh?”

“Alright. This is the whole story.” I sat back on his couch, cup of tea
in hand, and gathered my thoughts. “Josh is my ex-boyfriend. We were
together for about three years and then one day, about six months ago,
he tells me he’s moving interstate. I didn’t have any warning and wa
s pretty cut up about it, obviously. Anyway about a month ago, after I
thought I’d finally gotten over him, he calls up and wants to talk… and
after what he did to me, I’ve been avoiding him. So that’s basically it with him.

“Scott and I met a few months back. We had a one nighter, and
somehow it became a regular thing, and I stupidly thought I could dea
l
with it, but I started to get feelings for him, and then when you said you
saw him at PeaSeas and, you know...” I bit my lip and stared at the floor
. “
Well, after that I called it off. I'd been avoiding him lately, until tonight
, and I guess I felt more than I thought I did, and... it was just still a bit hard to see him." Sean exhaled then pursed his lips, as though trying to work out what to say next. “I’m sorry, Sean.” I managed. “I didn’t mean to lead you on like this. Maybe we should hold off for a while, while I sort myself out. It’s not fair on you.”