Flesh: Part Twelve (The Flesh Series Book 12) (4 page)

He opens the door to
me, giving me a glimpse inside. I wrap my arms around myself as my
eyes take in the room. It's not ominous looking like the red room in
Flesh. The walls match the rest of the house, and there's good
lighting overhead. Not like any dungeon I've ever seen.

Admittedly, I don't
know what most of the furniture is. The room is missing the classic
Saint Andrew's Cross that seems to be a staple of most dungeons.
There's more than enough other furniture to make up for it though,
chairs and benches and tables. Some look like Lucian might have
stolen them from his plastic surgery practice. Others appear to be
custom made. It's an impressive spread.

My eyes dance from
piece of furniture to piece of furniture, trying to discern their
various uses. Then they finally land on the bed at the back of the
room, and I gasp.

***

“
It's the bed
from the furniture store.” I take long strides across the room
to get to it. “The one that we...”

“
Yes.” I
can hear the grin in Lucian's voice, but it's tempered with something
else. Something dark and sensual.

The frame has been
painted black, and the light floral comforter has been replaced with
a plain black one. I run my fingertips over it, my mind instantly
drifting to our coupling in the furniture store. Somehow, seeing the
bed in this room, a room built for sexual fantasy, has my hormones
heating up. A blush comes to me cheeks as I begin to realize that I
kind of want this to happen. I want to have another scene with
Lucian. A real scene.

Last time, I dipped
my toe into the BDSM world. This time, I'll be diving in head first.

I turn to him with
new resolve, my eyes landing on his satisfied expression. He steps up
to me, so close that I can smell his cologne. I straighten the front
of his jacket, my eyes growing hooded as I surrender to my secret
desires.

“
Are you
ready?” he asks.

“
Mhm.” I
nod curtly. I don't think I've ever been more ready to experiment
than I am now.

“
Good.”
He places his index finger under my chin, tipping my face up to look
at him. “In here, you will do everything that I tell you to.
You will call me Sir and only Sir.”

The way he's talking
sends a warm shiver down my spine that rolls all the way to my core.
The dominance of his voice is so stupidly sexy that I can already
feel myself getting wet. We should have done this a long time ago.
Why was I always so afraid of it?

“
Since you
want to know what goes on at Flesh, we're going to do this as if we
were at Flesh,” he continues. “You will use the standard
safety words. Yellow for if it's getting too intense. Red if you want
me to stop completely.”

“
No safety
words.” I shake my head.

“
Amy.”

“
Do the other
girls use safety words?” I gaze up at him.

He blinks a few
times before responding. “They have the option of using them.”

“
Do they use
them though?”

“
No.”

“
Then neither
will I,” I insist stubbornly.

“
Suit
yourself.” His jaw tenses slightly, a good sign that he doesn't
like the idea of me not wanting to use safety words. “Are you
ready to begin?”

I inhale deeply, my
heartbeat beginning to hasten at the realization that this is
actually going to happen. He's going to do things to me in here.
Horrible things. Things I might not be able to handle.

“
Yes, I'm
ready.”

“
Alright
then.” Lucian takes a few steps away from me before turning
back around. “Take off your clothes. All of them. I want you to
fold them neatly and put them on the bench by the door. When you're
done, you will return to me and kneel on the floor. Do you
understand?”

“
Yes, Sir.”
I bow my head respectfully.

The thought that I'm
going to get completely naked in front of him with this much light
shining down on me makes me feel incredibly nervous. Even though he's
seen me naked several times before, I worry that all of my flaws will
be amplified in the light. I don't want him to see them, but this is
what I signed up for. I have no choice.

Hesitantly, I reach
for the hem of the brown long-sleeved shirt I'm wearing. Now, more
than ever, I'm glad that I layered my clothing. It will take a while
for me to get naked, and hopefully my confidence will build with each
shed item of clothing. That's wishful thinking though.

I pull the top off
and then slip out of my skirt. All the while, Lucian stands there
with his arms crossed over his chest and his legs slightly spread,
watching me with a hard expression. I don't know if I'm pleasing him
or not, but I'm honestly too consumed by my own insecurities to care.

I turn to take the
clothes that I've removed so far to the bench near the door, but then
I hear Lucian say, “Stop.” I glance at him over my
shoulder, giving him a quizzical look. “Take everything off
first, then you can fold them and put them on the bench.”

“
What do you
want me to do with them now?”

“
Toss them on
the floor.” He nods towards a spot next to my feet.

I already feel naked
stripped down to my base layer of clothing. The pink tights I'm
wearing hug my thighs, showing off my curves in all the wrong places.
The gray camisole I still have on isn't doing me any favors either.

I take a deep breath
and start peeling off the tights, repeating over and over again in my
mind that he's seen it all before, so he can't possibly be
disappointed by the package now. Then I pull off the camisole in a
few jerking motions and toss it onto the pile of clothing as well.

“
Slow
down,” he says the words one at a time. “You're starting
to get nervous.”

I
look up at him blankly. Of course, I'm nervous. I feel like a whale
with the way the light is playing off of my rolls. PETA could come
busting through the door at any minute to try to push me back into
the ocean.

Defensively,
I cross my arms over my stomach, which only makes him scowl.

“
Arms
at your sides,” he tells me.

I
knew that was coming, but it still doesn't make me want to do it.
With a huff, I drop my arms, turning my head to avoid his gaze. I
don't want to see him judging me.

“
Look
at me, Amy. You're beautiful. There's no reason for you to hide.”

I
sure as hell don't feel beautiful right now. The self-consciousness I
was hoping would go away has come out full-fledged, rising to the
forefront of everything. He's standing before me, an Adonis.
Masculine perfection. And all I can do is wonder why in the hell he'd
want someone like me. It makes me want to start crying.

“
Amy,
stop it. You're getting inside your own head. Just look at me. Focus
on me.”

I
do look at him, my eyes locking onto those two stunning blue pools
that are so captivating. I feel the tiniest pull in my heart, more
from the realization that he can read me so well. It's astonishing
how good he is, how much he seems to know me.

“
Now
take off your bra. I want to see your tits,” his tone takes a
crude turn, but the look in his eyes is so heated that it completely
turns me on.

I
blush as I reach behind myself to fumble with my bra. My fingers are
trembling from nervousness, and it takes a few tries for me to
unclasp it. You'd think I was a teenage boy unhooking a bra for the
first time by how clumsy I'm being. It's embarrassing.

I
suck up my hatred of my body and try to pretend to be sexy, allowing
the straps of my bra to slowly slide down my arms before the cups
part from my breasts and leave me expose. I dare to glance back up at
Lucian, and he seems pleased, a half-cocked smirk on his face.
Somehow, it just makes me feel more self-conscious, but I shimmy out
of the bra the rest of the way anyway before tossing it onto the
pile.

“
Gorgeous,”
he muses. “It's hard to keep my hands off of you. Now your
underwear.” He nods to my panties.

A small sigh leaves
my lips before I begin pulling them down, trying not to be too rushed
about it, but also feeling like I can't possibly make the act look
sexy. Thankfully, he doesn't chastise me for it. Once my underwear
are around my ankles, I kick them off to the side, glancing down at
my pile of clothes.

“
Now you may
fold them,” he tells me, and I quickly get to work gathering
them and taking them to the bench to fold them before returning to
him, the soft carpet caressing the bottoms of my feet as I walk.

Kneeling in front of
Lucian feels awkward, and I'm briefly reminded of the instructions
that the front office guy at Flesh gave me. He said that Lucian likes
for his submissives to be kneeling when he enters the room. I can't
help but wonder how many women have knelt in front of him before me.
How many more will kneel before him if I can't satisfy his needs?
It's an unpleasant thought, and it only strengthens my resolve.

“
Look at me,”
he instructs.

I'm quickly becoming
aware that I have a tendency to bow my head. It probably stems from
my embarrassment of being in such a situation. Obviously, he doesn't
like it, so it's something I'll need to get over.

When I look up at
Lucian, he's gazing down at me with pure appreciation in his eyes. It
makes my heart swirl with warm, pleasant feelings. There's a sense of
satisfaction in knowing that I'm making him happy, in knowing that
I'm giving him what he wants.

The back of his
fingertips whisper over my cheek, and I find myself leaning into his
touch. My body is alight with lust, my heart coming alive with an
emotion that's completely unmerited after everything he's put me
through. Love. I'm beginning to remember that I love this man, and
though I don't want to think about it, I can't help but feel it.

“
You will stay
here,” he tells me before his hand leaves my face and he turns
away from me.

I do as I'm told,
watching him as he walks to a closet in the far corner of the room.
My heart races as I wonder what he's going to pull out. I highly
doubt it will be a flogger or riding crop or cane. There are racks
and bins around the room filled with more BDSM implements than I've
ever seen in a dungeon before. One rack on the wall has at least
twenty different whips and belts hanging off of it of various lengths
and widths. Another has just as many floggers and paddles. There's a
bin sitting next to what appears to be a padded dentist's chair that
has so many canes and riding crops sticking out of it that I doubt
any more could fit. Surely to God, no Dom could possibly ever need
this much stuff.

Thankfully, I was
right about Lucian not grabbing something to torture me with.
Instead, he returns to me with a thick black collar in his hand. I
straighten myself as best I can while he walks behind me to fasten it
around my neck. He uses the two finger rule, making sure it's not too
tight though it's still a bit too snug for my liking. Part of me
wants to ask him to loosen it, but then I remind myself that I'm in
this for his extreme Flesh experience, so I shouldn't expect him to
make exceptions for me.

Once the collar is
in place, he walks back around to face me. I make sure to look up at
him, knowing that he doesn't like it when my head is down. There's
the slightest hint of a grin on his face as if he's pleased that he
didn't have to correct me this time. He hooks a finger under the
front of the collar, and my eyes go hooded, showing my desire for
him.

But then he slips
another finger under the collar and starts pulling.

The first wave of
panic washes over me as I feel my breathing being restricted. There's
a sadistic gleam in his eyes, his grin suddenly turning wicked as he
applies more pressure until my face begins to turn red and I let out
a choked gasp. It takes everything in me to keep my arms at my sides.
Fight or flight syndrome is kicking in. My need to survive is
screaming to all of my senses to pull out of his grasp, that I'm in
some sort of mortal danger. I can't believe it though. I won't
believe that Lucian would ever really hurt me.

A pained gasp
escapes my lips as I feel the collar digging into the back of my
neck. It burns like it's cutting into me, but I know that it will
only leave a red mark behind. This is a game of mind over matter, of
how much I can endure before I pull away. And Lucian is very much
enjoying playing it.