First Lady (9 page)
Sarah? The girl from the family pictures? Acne? Lauren marveled. Sarah looked like a fashion model. And Lauren hated her with an intensity that would melt solid steel.
Sarah turned to Lauren. “And you are?” She knew damn well who she was.
“That’s my—” Dev began.
“Don’t!” Lauren interrupted, her face turning an angry red as her hurt and anger mixed. “I can speak for myself.”
Dev’s mouth clicked closed.
Lauren took a calming breath. “I’m Lauren Strayer.” Hard gray eyes trained themselves on Devlyn. “The President’s biographer.”
Dev’s stomach dropped 12 stories.
Lauren’s hands were shaking. Humiliated and torn between dissolving into tears and murder, she quickly tucked them under her arms. This has to be wrong, but I saw it with my own eyes. My own eyes! That was no sisterly kiss. “I’m going to leave now,” she ground out, feeling as though she was going to throw up.
Devlyn panicked. “For God’s sake, Lauren! It wasn’t—”
Lauren turned on her heels and marched out of the Oval Office on slightly wobbly legs, leaving the trio of stunned woman behind her.
For a second Dev wasn’t sure what to do, then she bolted for the door.
“Dev,” Beth began softly, “I wouldn’t.”
Devlyn looked at Beth with an expression so heartbroken it brought tears to Beth’s eyes. “But I have to go and fix things.” Dev’s shout rattled the pictures on the wall, then it dropped to a whisper. “She doesn’t understand.” This is not happening. She lifted her jaw a little, daring Beth not to believe her. “It wasn’t what it looked like. I would never do that to Lauren. I’d die first.”
Sarah closed her eyes as Dev’s words pierced her heart. Damn.
Beth shook her head quickly. “Don’t do it, Dev. She needs to cool off or—”
Dev’s jaw worked silently. She had no choice. “I won’t risk losing her by doing nothing.” She’ll understand once I talk to her. I know it. But memories of Lauren’s words about Judd’s infidelity haunted her. “I won’t live that way again. Ever.”
Beth watched as Devlyn disappeared into the outer office and with a tremulous voice asked Jane which direction Lauren had headed. Then she was gone.
Beth whirled around and pinned Sarah with a withering glare. She marched up to the younger woman and grabbed her by the shirt, dragging her over to the sofa where she roughly pushed her down. “Talk,” she demanded. “And don’t you lie, Sarah Turner. Devlyn might not have noticed the crush you’ve had on her since you were old enough to know what one was. But she’s the only one.”
Sarah swallowed hard. “Devlyn didn’t do anything either.” Her eyes conveyed a mixture of fear and anguish. “I think I really messed up, Beth.”
Beth groaned. I knew it. Thank, God. “You’d better hope that Dev can convince Lauren of the same thing, Sarah. Or I wouldn’t want to be you,” she said grimly, meaning every word.
MARCH
L
AUREN SAT ON A bench in Rock Creek Park, soaking in the sounds of the night: the wind rattling dry branches, the faint but sharp cracking of sticks, and the rustling of old leaves and rocks as a small animal or two scurried through the woods around her. The morning sun was still several hours away and soft moonlight bathed her in a muted, ethereal glow as she tucked her chilled hands into the soft pockets of her leather coat. Small patches of snow still dotted the brown grass, though the temperature was well into the 40s.
Removing one hand from its warm haven, she gave Gremlin — who was lying next to her on the bench with his head resting on her thigh, sound asleep — a scratch behind the ears. While she wasn’t exactly at peace, she was far more centered than when she’d briskly walked into the park the evening before. She hadn’t cried, plotted anyone’s murder, or contemplated the devastating thought of life without Devlyn in several hours. This was, she decided, something she needed very much. To be alone.
Not the “alone” she’d experienced since becoming engaged to the most famous woman on the planet.
But really, actually alone. Unless you counted Gremlin, which she didn’t. No paparazzi. No milling aides or secretaries. No agents with guns, grim faces, and annoying protocol. Just her. Funny thing was, despite wanting it so badly, she still felt a little lonely. Lauren dropped her face into her hands. “What is wrong with me?”
She let out a deep breath as her mind replayed her hasty retreat from the White House. She had known that Devlyn would come looking for her and had purposely hid in the kitchen for a few moments before going back to her quarters and packing an overnight bag. Talking to Devlyn just then would have been dangerous. Too dangerous. Because, in all likelihood, it would have been for the last time. She was that angry and hurt and that stressed.
But the last few hours of solitude had given her a little of the perspective that she’d lacked earlier. Lauren was honest enough with herself to admit that she hadn’t been fair to Devlyn when she refused her the opportunity to explain. But her blood had been boiling, and like a wounded animal she longed to lash out, to savagely inflict pain in a misguided attempt at self-defense.
She was glad now that she’d been able to escape. Glad that she’d seen David on the way out of the White House and told him in no uncertain terms that if she was followed she wouldn’t be coming back. Ever. She hadn’t meant that, not even then, when her heart felt so raw she could hardly breathe. She didn’t really believe Devlyn would cheat on her. But her heart had lied to her before, hadn’t it? “Damn.”
Lauren sucked in a deep breath and tilted her head skyward, her cheeks long dry of the tears she’d shed earlier. The faint sound of crunching wood chips in the distance caused her to turn her head and peer intently through the darkness.
Instantly awake, Gremlin jumped down from the bench and began to growl into the night, baring his tiny crooked teeth in an impressive show of ferocity.
Lauren felt her pulse pick up a little as she belatedly realized that it wasn’t safe to be sitting in the middle of a
very
wooded, very secluded park at
Then she sprang to her feet, standing behind Gremlin as a single figure emerged from the shadows. Her fists clenched and unclenched as she glanced behind her, prepared to run if she needed to. Her heart began to pound and a rush of adrenaline sang through her blood. How stupid am I?
she
berated herself. I’m gonna get myself killed!
“Who is it?” Lauren asked, hearing her voice shake a little.
The figure moved closer. “Lauren?”
The blonde woman nearly collapsed in heap when the familiar voice washed over her. “Devlyn?” It can’t be.
Dev stepped closer, giving the still snarling Gremlin a disgusted glance. “You know who I am, dog. See?” Devlyn bent down in front of Gremlin so that he could see her face. Once he did, however, he continued to bark and growl even louder. “Stupid mutt,” Dev grumbled, moving a step backwards when Gremlin’s snaggle-toothed mouth began snapping open and closed. A tiny part of her, however, was glad the worthless canine was so fiercely protecting Lauren. She’ll let him do that, Devlyn thought enviously, but not me.
“Gremlin…” Lauren warned in a soft, but firm, voice. Her gaze never strayed from Devlyn.
The small beast quieted instantly, but kept a wary eye on his mistress’ lover.
Dev sniggered inwardly, enjoying the tiny victory while she could.
“How did you find me?” Lauren asked, not masking her surprise and making no move to sit down or cross the 10 feet or so that separated her from the other woman.
Gremlin trotted over to Lauren and plopped down on her feet, already bored.
Dev sighed, her eyes showing her longing to embrace Lauren but also the fear that she would be turned away if she tried. At least she’s still talking to me. That’s something. She swallowed, knowing she had to tell the truth, but dreading saying the words. “I spoke to all of the agents assigned to you.” She didn’t mention that she’d called half of them out of bed to come to the White House to be grilled by her when her initial searching couldn’t turn up Lauren. “And this was one of the places they told me you like to come sometimes.” She was suddenly struck by the thought that they’d never been here together.
“Mmm…” Dejected, Lauren nodded. She gave Gremlin a gentle nudge and he moved off her feet, allowing her to pad back to the bench and sit down heavily. “Why are you here, Devlyn?”
Her voice was so quiet it was almost swept away by the breeze.
Devlyn’s stomach churned. She felt as if she was in some bad movie where someone else scripted the predictable lines and she was being swept away by the drama of the scene, scared and out of control. I’m here because I love you. I’m here to explain.
I’m here because I’m afraid that this life will be too much for you and you’ll leave me bleeding and broken and desperately alone.
“You know why I’m here,” she said, trying to keep her resentment and fear from her voice. “May I sit down?” She indicated the bench next to Lauren.
Lauren gave a quick nod, scooting over a little when Gremlin jumped up next to her and snuggled up to her thigh to stay warm.
“Is it safe?” Dev asked, not really caring what the answer was. She would have sat next to Lauren if a crocodile, instead of merely the ugliest dog on earth, had been resting his face in her lap. “You haven’t been holding my picture in front of him and training him to kill, have you?”
Lauren’s first instinct was to smile and she didn’t try to fight it, though the gesture was half-hearted at best. “No attack training. He won’t even fetch when I ask him, much less anything more strenuous.” An image of Dev and Sarah kissing flashed through her mind and she felt a little sick. She turned away from Dev, unwilling to look at her as she released a heavy breath.
Dev’s heart clenched when Lauren looked away, and she felt tears fill her eyes. She blinked them back and sat down with a weary groan. With a single hand she rubbed her tired, stinging eyes, wishing she could start the entire day over again. Then she tucked her hand back into the pocket of her long woolen coat. It was the coldest part of the night and an oppressive dampness was overtaking the air.
She had combed the park looking for Lauren for nearly three hours and had run across four sleeping homeless people, two of whom were children. She made a mental note to do something about them. The wheels of government turned too slow for her taste, but she could help two specific kids in the cold, if she put her mind to it. There had been a pair of young lovers on a blanket, who were… well, she didn’t stay around long to see exactly what they were doing, but their moans and the steam rising off their barely-blanket-covered bodies left little to the imagination. There was a harmless jogger and then finally came a man who was singing “Some Enchanted Evening” at the top of his lungs to his unfortunate paramour, who also happened to be an oak tree.
God, she missed
Lauren’s head snapped sideways as she realized something. She looked over the tops of her glasses, behind Dev and into the woods around them. Seeing nothing, she squinted as she gazed down the narrow path from which Devlyn had emerged. “You’re alone,” she whispered. “Or do I just not see them?”
Dev knew this wasn’t what they needed to talk about. But now that she was here she found herself in no hurry to tackle the tough stuff. That would be hard enough without diving right in. She shook her head, not needing to ask whom Lauren was referring to. “I told them to wait by the car.” Though she’d checked in with the Secret Service every few minutes and moved the car no less than six times so they would never be more than a moment or two away.
Lauren’s eyes widened. She looked at Dev again, realizing that, except for a few days at Janet and Frank’s farm in
“David must be having a fit.”
Dev studied her shoes. “Umm…”
Lauren cocked her head sideways, recognizing that tone. “What?”
“I don’t think he’s speaking to me right now,” Dev admitted a little sheepishly, cringing.
“Why? If he should be angry with anyone, it’s me. God, what I said to him.”
“He’s not mad at you.”
Lauren gave Dev a look.
“Okay, he is mad at you. At us both. He didn’t want me looking for you, and when I told him I was doing it anyway, well, things got out of hand.”
Lauren took off her glasses and stuffed them into her pocket — a light fog was settling over the park and they were steaming up. “And then?” she prodded.
“And then I fired him.”
“What!” Lauren’s voice was so loud it nearly woke Gremlin. Nearly. “It’s not safe for you to be out alone. It’s not the same for me, Devlyn. The shooting—”
“He’s not the boss of me,” Devlyn stated, hoping it didn’t sound as childish to Lauren’s ears as it did her own.
Lauren stretched out her feet and stared into the trees with unseeing eyes. “We’re quite a pair, aren’t we?”