Finding Faith (11 page)

“Faith, who—”, he was about to ask who she was going to meet in Miami when she spoke at the same time.
 

Faith’s voice interrupted his thoughts, “No, I think it would be best for me to head down to Miami. I’m sure you two will have a great time without me.”
 

And with that, she walked out of the room, leaving him standing there by himself. Alone. Jealous. Frustrated. And very, very confused about the depth of the feelings he had for his sexy neighbor.
 

There had to be a way to stop her from going down to Miami. She may not realize it yet, but he was a man on a mission. And that mission had a name.
 

Faith.
 

Faith’s life had changed so much in the last few months. Some good. Some bad. Some things...well, she was still deciding how to react to them. She was no longer on her own and she loved every minute of her new way of life. It was always Cooper, Faith, and Madison, in that order. Even when attending their neighborhood events, it was always the three of them. It was just expected.
 

If Madison drew a picture for Cooper, she drew one for Faith. If Faith was at the house when Madison went to bed at night, she had to read her story before she fell asleep. When Faith had to work late or travel out-of-state on business, Madison called her every night. Mainly to tell her about her day before she went to bed, but Faith loved every minute of their conversations. She had even taken to including Faith in the family drawings that included her, Cooper and her Angel Mommy in Heaven, as Madison referred to her birth mother.
 

For all intents and purposes, Faith was already a part of their family in every way that counted the most. Except that she wasn’t, nor did she expect to ever be, a loving partner to Cooper. At least not until a few weeks ago when things had seemed to change between them.
 

Walking back into the living room, she glanced behind her to see where Cooper was. She gasped when she saw the look in his eyes. No, that was definitely not the look of a platonic friend. His eyes were full of meaning and they were focused slowly on her retreating form.
 

“Where have you been, Faith? You and daddy took forever,” she almost jumped out of her skin as Madison started speaking. Leave it up to the little imp to call them both out.
 

“We were in the kitchen. Um, we were trying to decide what we should do before you and your dad go to the beach,” she responded, trying to get the little girl’s mind off of what had taken them so long.
 

“But, aren’t you coming too?” Her bottom lip began to poke out and quiver. “I told daddy I wanted you there with us. Why can’t you come?”
 

“Oh, honey, come up here.” Pulling the little girl up from the chaise lounge, she turned and sat down herself. Lifting Madison onto her lap, she gave her a hug. “I would if I could, but I’m going somewhere else.”
 

“But why? You don’t like the beach?” The sadness in Madison’s voice broke her heart.
 

“I love the beach. We’ll all go together another time. How about that?” Faith really wanted to get her off of this topic.
 

“Do you not want to be around us anymore?” Oh no, where did that question come from? Faith wasn’t sure how she was going to win this battle.
 

Squeezing her arms around the little girl even tighter, she gave her a kiss on the forehead, “Oh, Princess, of course I do. I love spending time with you. You’re my partner-in-crime and that’s never going to change.”
 

“But then who are you going with?” She was like a detective.
 

“Well, a friend of mine that I haven’t seen in a long, long time lives down there. He wants me to come visit him since we haven’t seen each other for a while,” she responded with the truth. “But I will be back here before you know it and we can have a picnic.” Hoping that last statement would make it all better, she waited patiently for Madison to respond.
 

“Promise?”
 

Faith sighed in relief, “I promise, sweetheart.”
 

Feeling a tingling sensation on the back of her neck, she looked up and saw Cooper standing in the entrance to the room. Lips turned up in a scowl, all she could think was that he looked pissed. He must have heard the entire conversation, but what reason would he have to be upset? Arthur truly was just a friend. Someone she had known back in college. They had never been “like that” with each other and never would.
 

Considering she was a single woman and Cooper had no claim on her, he could be as upset as he wanted to. She wasn’t changing her plans because he felt threatened that she had a life outside of him. If he wanted more from her, then he needed to step up to plate.
 

And aside from that little interlude in the kitchen just now…and the other week after the trip to Washington, DC, she admitted begrudgingly, he hadn’t done anything to show her that he truly wanted more. That their flirtation was more than just two friends who were in close proximity to each other. Sometimes, she wondered how she had gotten into this mess. Falling in love with a man who was still in love with his deceased wife had not been her best move.
 

Deciding to ignore Cooper, she turned back to Madison. That man could get glad in the same underwear he got mad in. She was not doing this with him tonight. Just because she had always been there for him in the past, didn’t mean she would stay that way. She had a life too and she would be damned if he would try to prevent that.
 

Picking up the remote control from where it sat on the coffee table, she turned up the television. Trying valiantly to ignore the man who had caused her numerous sleepless nights, she purposely looked away from him. It took all her willpower not to turn around and ask him why he was just standing there staring a hole in the back of her head.
 

After a few more seconds, he gave up and stomped back into the kitchen. His heavy footsteps hinting at his level of frustration. Good! Now he could feel a little of what she had been going through.
 

When she and Cooper had first met, it had been lust at first sight. At least for her it was. Not usually prone to jumping to conclusions, she found herself doodling his name while sitting in meetings. Or she found that she was prone to waiting for that first glimpse of him each day. For a grounded woman in her early thirties, she had become giddy at the thought of her and Cooper as a couple. A naked, sweaty, loving all night long until the sun came up type of couple. It was completely out of character for her, but that hadn’t made the thoughts go away.
 

But no matter what happened and no matter how many times she may have wished he’d look at her as more than just a friend, it just hadn’t come to be. They had lived next to each other for all these months and other than their first embarrassing meeting, she had been very careful to not make any risky moves. That didn’t mean she hadn’t given him a hug that lasted a second too
long. Or ran her hands through his hair as they were hanging out at the park, or even while sitting on the front porch watching Madison play with her friends.
 

Cooper had never given any real inkling of being attracted to her, other than to remark on her appearance in a general sense, as any gentleman would. There were those moments when it had been only the two of them, when things seemed just right. Perfectly situated for something to change, for the moment to flip. Whether they were sitting on the porch swing out front or at the dining room table after a meal. She could almost feel something bubbling to the surface, waiting to break free.
 

Just as she would begin to peel back the layers and gather enough bravado to address the elephant in the room, something would always happen. Some interruption would occur to end the moment and the opportunity would slip through her hands. Or, even worse, seconds...minutes would simply pass by without a word being said between the two of them. Usually because she was too chicken-shit to risk putting her foot in her mouth.
 

He had even gone on a few dates and asked her to watch Madison. Those had not been fun nights for her. Waiting. Wondering. Praying that her overly dramatic mind was completely and utterly wrong.
 

They were very close friends and she loved that about their relationship. That was one part of her world that she never wanted to change. They spent almost all their free time together. Finishing each other’s sentences had become a running joke. Cooper never failed to anticipate her needs, even when she was in a total funk. It was new and different, and somewhat refreshing, to only be friends without the sex mixed in. Some marriages had lasted for less time than their friendship and she would be smart to not mess that up.
 

Then again, her growing desire for Cooper, that elusive need to have something more with him, almost broke her heart. How she longed to tell him that her feelings for him went deeper than he knew. If only she were brave enough to just blurt out the words and let him know that she wanted more. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on her part.
 

When he asked her to go the beach with them for a family trip, she was so tempted to say yes. Telling him no had been one of the hardest things she’d had to do. Everything in her screamed out that this was the moment. That she should jump at this chance. But the offer from Arthur had been real. Only thing was, she hadn’t actually told him yes. At least not yet.
 

Maybe it was time to shake things up a bit. Maybe Cooper needed to understand what he had right in front of him before it was too late.
 

 

Faith had managed to avoid Cooper for almost a week. Every time he would call, she would try to avoid picking up. Not one to be deterred, he would then text her. Asking her question like where she was and when would she be home.
 

It was hard to keep making up excuses about work. Yes, she was busy, but at this point, they both knew that she was trying to avoid him.
 

And damn right she was trying to avoid him! That look in his eyes the other week had her panties soaking. It took everything in her not to strip naked and beg him to take her right then and there. The only thing stopping her was that she didn’t believe the desire was real. They had been spending too much time in each other’s company. Coupled with their closeness, it probably seemed like they “should” be having sex.
 

He had even asked her about the date she went on a few weeks ago. Madison had a playdate with a friend and the parent’s would be bringing her home around seven. Cooper had come to her house and asked her to sit outside with him. At first she thought it was odd, but his reasons became clear soon enough.
 

“Who was the guy you went out with the other night,” he opened.
 

Thrown off by the question, she didn’t immediately know what, or who, he was referring to. “I didn’t go on a date the other night.”
 

Glancing at her sideways, he asked his question again, “Fine. A month ago. You remember Faith. It was the night you came home at almost midnight. The night I couldn’t reach you. Who was he?”
 

Firing question after question at her about who he was, what he did for a living, where did they go, did she like him, and was she going to see him again? It had been daunting and he was determined to get the answers to his questions. She could see how he was such a good leader in his
military special forces unit. The man was an unstoppable force when focused on something.
 

Hackles rising at the tone of his voice and the questions he asked, she fired back, “Why do you care? It’s none of your business who I choose to date.”
 

Taking a deep breath, she interrupted him just as he was going to ask another question, “Do I ask you about the women you date? Have I ever stuck my nose in your business, even when you ask me to watch Madison?” In her anger, her voice had risen a few levels and she was practically yelling at him. “Well, have I?”
 

He looked out over her front yard as she glared at his profile. Bending over at the waist, he placed his elbows on his knees, his voice was tight with what she could only assume was anger, “I didn’t like it. And I can’t get it out of my head.”
 

Glancing at her, his face was no longer pinched in anger, but now his eyes looked tortured.
 

“Can’t get what out of your head, Cooper?” Unsure if she wanted to know the answer, she asked the question anyway.
 

“The thought of another man holding you in his arms, kissing you,” he replied. Lips pursed tightly, he reluctantly answered her question.